A Jar of Hearts

by Cartharn, Clarissa

  “James,” she said softly, closing her eyes.

  He cupped her face and leaned into her. His lips ached to taste her. He wanted to caress her tongue with his, to dive into her mouth and reveal her inner most secrets.

  “James, stop,” she said.

  “Hmm?” He glanced up at her eyes and was met with an icy stare. They weren’t the warm green ones he had always taken granted for. “Anne?”

  “What’s your going rate for fucking a blind woman?”

  “What?”

  She stepped away from him. “No, that wasn’t right. We should take account of everything you’ve done from the very beginning. How much for taking a blind girl out to dinner?”

  “Anne, what are you talking about?” He inched closer to her, frowning. He had no idea what she was on about.

  “Stay away from me!” She gritted the words between her teeth angrily. “James, I know! I’m blind but I’m not stupid! I know. Julia paid you to take me out.”

  “What?” He paled, finally realizing what she was saying. She must have heard Julia berating him over the phone. There was no other way she could have known. Julia would certainly never tell her.

  “Oh stop the pretence already, James. Just give me your charge and I’ll pay you off now. Julia would never have been able to afford it anyway.” She fumbled her way to her bag on the sofa.

  “Are you saying I’m so good that Julia could never have afforded my rate?” he chided.

  She scowled. “Why don’t you tell me how much I owe you so I can be done with you?”

  He scratched his brow. “No charge for you.”

  She stopped. “Excuse me? That is absurd. Stop being the sudden gallant knight and tell me how much it is I owe you.” She reached back for her bag,

  “Okay, stop it,” he said, moving to pull her away from her bag.

  She caught his arm, locking in his wrist as she swung at him with her other fist. “And I told you to stay away from me!”

  His instincts raced, blocking her attack. He let out a relieving sigh. His chin would have taken a week to recover from that blow if it had met her punch. Where did she get such brutal strength? He didn’t have time to think about that one as she repeatedly slapped his chest with bare palms and then aimed at his face again with a clenched fist.

  He blocked it again, swerving her around so she was spooned into him. In her state of rage, it was the safest place for his face. His cock was another matter, because he felt it hardening from all their wrangling.

  “And I had told you earlier that we should spar,” he teased.

  He locked her into his body, trying to hold her firmly as she writhed in his arms.

  “I hate you!” she screamed.

  “And I love you,” he whispered into her ear.

  She froze for a brief instant and then resumed her wriggling even more intensely. “You lying despicable bastard! Let me go!”

  “Anne… stop! I’m not lying. I love you.”

  She finally managed to pull out of his arms and then swirled to attack him again. He blocked her punches, dodging them as he moved back, trying not to hurt her in the process.

  “Anne, Julia didn’t pay me and I would never take any money to date you,” he pleaded.

  She swerved a fist at him and he ducked.

  “Damn it, Anne, can we talk this out at least!” Where was the placid Anne he had fallen in love with? On the other hand, he quite liked this fiery side to her as well.

  His pleas made no difference to her anger as she continued with her attacks against him, one fist after another. He had to find some way to reason with her, but would she listen in such a state? Finally, having had enough, he put considerable distance between them. As long as she could touch him, she would attack him.

  “Where are you, you bastard?!” she minced in rage.

  There was only one way to end this. He raced into her and threw her over his shoulder in one smooth fireman’s lift. She was stunned and he had to take advantage of that as he sped up the stairs and towards his bedroom.

  “What are you doing?” she mumbled in shock and then screamed, “What the fuck are you doing?!

  She beat his back and he winced. There were going to be bruises in the morning, but so as long as she left bruises of another kind too, he would be fine.

  He threw her on his bed and leapt onto her as quickly as he could, holding down her legs by sitting on her and pinning her flailing arms against the bed.

  “Get off me, you fucking… bastard… asshole…!”

  “Are you done with the swearing? Because it doesn’t suit you at all.”

  “Get off me,” she repeated between clenched teeth.

  “Only if you hear me out,” he said, taking deep breaths of air. She had exhausted him with all her tussle.

  She grew quiet, her body still rigid from her rage. It would have to suffice, he thought. She was listening, at least.

  “Julia was worried about you,” he started. “When she said she would pay me, she only meant the extent she would go to just see you happy again. I would never take money to date you or any other woman. But there is no other woman, Anne. Not since I laid eyes on you. It’s only ever been you.”

  “I don’t believe you,” she almost whispered.

  “What will it take to convince you?”

  She was silent, contemplating his question for a while. “Say it to me again,” she muttered at last. “I… love you.”

  He released her hands and stretched out over her. She stayed rigid and still, her breasts rising and falling quickly as he bridged the gap between them. She had to want him, he thought, his eyes resting on her lips. His thumb brushed the corners of her mouth, his cock pressing achingly hard against her stomach.

  “I love you,” he whispered, his raspy voice grazing her face.

  Her fingers spread over his wide, muscled shoulders, feeling him as if she was testing the credibility of his declaration. Did she believe him?

  She raked up her hands to his face so slowly that he thought he would die from the hardness she was rousing inside him. And when she speared his fingers into his hair and sucked in a deep breath, he swore under his hoarse breath. There was only so much a man could take!

  He crushed his lips against hers, stabbing his tongue hungrily into her mouth. She moaned and her sounds only starved him more for her. He was in no mood for sweet loving after all the beating she gave him. He wanted to hurt her too, one that she would also love.

  His hand moved hastily under her dress, tugging her panties roughly off her. His fingers dove eagerly into her pussy, slipping easily through her juices and plundering her heat. His eyes sought her face, partly to ensure she was okay with what he was doing to her. She arched off the bed as she pushed her pelvis further onto his hand. Her grinding had him almost gasping for air and he was caught between breathing and losing his sanity. He chose the latter, burying himself between her thighs, tasting her core.

  She bucked off the mattress as his tongue thrust in and out of her. Finally, her thighs clenched, her fingers knotting his hair and pulling his head further into him so he could taste her orgasms on his tongue.

  She stilled, taking deep panting breaths and he lifted his head off her to glance up at her. Her skirt was ridden up to her breasts, gathered messily at her neck. She was all bare to him except for her twisted garments that were clumped between them. She was certainly a sight. Her panties were torn and dangling to one hip and her flimsy bra hadn’t protected her breasts from his hands, weaving chaotically into her skirt.

  Her disheveled state revealed his madness to possess her and yet here he was, hard again and wanting more.

  He snaked up her and kissed her brow. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

  “No.” She touched his torso with her fingertips as if he was fragile.

  He pulled in a sharp breath of air. If she continued, she would probably break him.

  “It was different,” she whispered. “I’ve never made love like that before. I didn
’t know… there would be so much pleasure in such pain.”

  It was true. He had always been so delicate with her and he knew it should shame him a little at least for being brutal with her, but the truth was he had been thrilled by their rough sex. And now to know she had felt the same…

  He buried his head into her shoulder, wrought with the torment to have her again. “Does it make me a sadist to want to do it all over again? Right now?”

  She gathered his head in her hands and kissed him tenderly. He speared his tongue into her mouth, tasting her all over again. He clasped her nape, holding her captive under him as he kissed her deeply, releasing her only when she broke away to gasp for air.

  His hand ran down her spine to cup her buttocks, his mouth capturing her nipples. She let out a whimper as he suckled onto them. He lifted up her arms and pulled her clothes off her. He took her hands and helped her wrap her fingers around the bars of the headboard.

  “Don’t let go until I say so,” he rasped into her ear.

  He removed the rest of his clothing and then straddled her. He looked down on her naked body. She was perfect in every way, he thought as he admired her. His cock rested on her sex, quivering to enter her. He thumbed her clit and she arched her back with pleasure.

  He burrowed his head back into her juncture, wrapping his lips around her clit.

  “James,” she moaned, releasing her hold from the bars to feather his hair. But he clasped her hands and returned them to the bars.

  “You want me inside you?” he whispered.

  She nodded, unable to blurt out the words.

  He smiled. “Then don’t let go.” He kissed her breasts. “That’s gonna have to cost you. I forbid you to cum.”

  She closed her eyes, pulling in a sharp breath. He pushed his fingers between her slick folds and watched her writhe with passion. Her scent rose to his nose and he couldn’t help but return his tongue to her clit. Her erratic breathing filled the air as he laved her nub, flicking it with his tongue.

  “James, I need you,” she groaned.

  “Beg me.”

  “Please.”

  He thrust his fingers in and out of her like a piston. “Properly.”

  Her hands grew white from her tight hold on the bars, her voice almost breathless. “Mercy.”

  It was all he needed. He wanted release just as much as she did. He sat on his knees, spreading her legs apart.

  “I won’t be gentle, Anne,” he said hoarsely.

  “I know.”

  He unwound her hold on the bars and threw her on her stomach. He tugged her buttocks up into the air and then began to mount her.

  “Are you sure?” he asked again.

  “Yes,” she uttered.

  He entered her slowly and she let out a little cry as he broke her seal. He thrust into her softly and as she became accustomed to him, he increased pace. He yanked her up against him, continuing to pound into her roughly until their bodies clenched together from the orgasms racing their hearts.

  They lay in bed, her head tucked into his shoulders, cherishing the warmth their naked bodies gave each other. He caressed her arm and she let out a sigh.

  “I used to hate you,” she started.

  “Why? Did I do something to make you feel that?”

  “No,” she said softly. “On the contrary, you did everything right. Too right.”

  She lifted up her head and he kissed her lightly on her brow.

  “You know you can tell me anything,” he said.

  She thumbed his jaw tenderly. “You were too much like Eric. You spoke like him and I bet you look like him too. I’ve touched you. I know.” She wrapped her arms around his waist tightly. “I couldn’t think I could love someone who was so much like him. I hated you for it. I hated that you were like him and yet… not him.”

  He closed his eyes. I am Eric, Anne. I’m still here.

  “Are you saying you love me now?” he asked aloud.

  “I’m… attracted to you. I know you said you loved me, and I’m sorry I can’t say the same back to you. At least, not yet.”

  “Shhh,” he whispered, turning on his side to hug her closely. “I didn’t say it so you could say it back. I told you how I was feeling and that was all to it.” He kissed her cheek. “Besides, attraction is always a good place to start.”

  He threaded his fingers into her hair as she tucked her face under his chin. But who was he kidding? He was splitting in two in the inside. He was glad she was loyal to Eric, but he didn’t understand why it hurt that she didn’t love James. I am both, damn it. It doesn’t matter either way. She loves Eric and she is with James.

  He closed his eyes, sinking into his dreams. Tomorrow he would wake up and everything would be fine. He would be Eric and she would love him like she always did.

  CHAPTER 22

  She opened her eyes with a smile and turned into the warm body beside her. Eric. She had always loved his smell. She pressed her nose against his neck to sniff him. He moaned in his dreams and she almost laughed out aloud.

  She kissed him lightly on his chin, loving the feel of his day old stubbles. He wound his arms around her, hugging her tightly so her breasts pressed against his hard torso. It was then she remembered that she was still naked. They had made love for most of the night and right now she was in a serious need of a shower.

  Love? She paled, growing stiff as she registered where she was. This wasn’t Eric.

  She shifted out of his embrace and felt her way towards the bathroom. How could she have mistaken him for Eric? She turned the faucet on, standing under the heavy spray of the water. It felt soothing on her tired and spent body. She could try lying to herself but she did enjoy his lovemaking. In that regard, he was nothing like Eric, who on the other hand, had always been gentle when they had sex.

  She grabbed a towel and wiped herself dry. I love you, she remembered his words. A chill ran up her. She had denied loving him last night, but the truth was she was beginning to feel for him. Other than the sex, he was every bit her Eric. Perhaps, fate was giving her a second chance.

  She rummaged in his closet and found a shirt she could don temporarily. She couldn’t go traipsing in his kitchen naked. What if the windows were open? Her stomach rumbled and she headed down to fix herself something to eat.

  Something knotted inside her as a feeling of déjà vu surfaced over her. This felt too familiar. She brushed her hair aside with the back of her hand and focused on what she needed to do. She loved berry yoghurt or pancakes, but she would have to check the fridge for any of those. He preferred orange juice and a toast.

  She bit her lower lip. She was muddling up her fantasies with her reality again. No, it was Eric who liked orange juice and toast for breakfast. She had no idea what James liked.

  “You’re up,” he said, startling her.

  “I didn’t hear you come down.”

  “Were you trying to run away again?” he asked as he gathered her in his arms. “I don’t think I’d be able to let you go this time.”

  He nuzzled her neck and she chuckled. His naked legs brushed against hers, tingling her, enjoying the feel of his skin.

  She stood on his bare feet, tippy toeing up to kiss him on his lips. “I was just trying to get some breakfast.”

  “Yeah?” he said between his kisses. “Come back to bed.”

  “It’s past eight in the morning. I really should be going home.”

  He groaned. “You’re a big girl. Julia will understand.” He cupped her breasts, kissing her cleavage. “Let’s go back to bed, please.”

  She caressed his hair, running it through her fingers. “Let me fix something up for myself and I’ll think about it.”

  “Okay,” he grumbled.

  “Okay.” She smiled, kissing his brow. “What will you have?”

  “You.”

  “I’m being serious.” She laughed.

  “So am I.” He sulked.

  “Oh come on, I promised you. After breakfast. Now, what do I ge
t you?”

  “You know, orange juice and toast. And there’s berries and yoghurt in the fridge,” he said, ambling lazily back towards the stairs. “I’ll get a shower while you’re at it.”

  She stilled. You know? How could she? And how did he know what she liked to eat for breakfast?

  She clenched her palm. There were too much uncanny resemblances between James and Eric. Was he… could James be Eric?

  The door bell rang before he could climb back up the stairs and he looked warily at the door. Who could it be at such an hour?

  “Jamie! Jamie! Open this damned door or I’ll shoot my way in,” Avanna screamed angrily.

  He gave a quick glance towards Anne who was standing frozen in the middle of his kitchen.

  “James?” she asked.

  “Stay there, Anne. I’ll sort it out.” His voice was stern, but with Avanna hammering on his door, he couldn’t help sounding strict and protective.

  “Who is it?”

  He ignored the question, turning the door knob to open it. Just a woman I fucked to try and get over you. He swiped a palm over his face. He was so screwed.

  Avanna pushed open the door, barging past him. “I was told you were on a date with a bitch last night. Is she here now?”

  “Avanna, stop.”

  “Who was she, Jamie?”

  “You need to leave now, Avanna.” He moved to grab her arm but she dodged him, heading down the hallway.

  Her high stiletto heels clicked rapidly against his floor as she strode into his house in her skin tight pants and black leather jacket. “I want to know if she is here.”

  “That’s none of your business,” he said quickly, following her. “We’re over, Avanna, so you had better get out of my house.”

  “And I told you we’re not done until I say so.” She turned, staring directly at Anne. “Is that her?”

  “Avanna…”

  “She’s wearing your shirt! You fucked her, you fucking bastard!”

  “James, what’s… going on?” Anne asked nervously.

  “You fucked my boyfriend, you bitch! That’s what’s going on!” Avanna shouted angrily.