by Amanda Perry
“Jack told me that my one stipulation to coming to live with them was that I respect the rules and remember they’re my family. I was a thirteen-year-old boy with no place to go and no one to show me how to be an adult. I didn’t look too good when I showed up at their house. The next day, Maggie took me to a store for some clothes that fit, and my new brothers wanted me to play with them like I belonged there. It took me a long time to figure out that they were my family, and they wanted me to be a part of it.”
“Lochlan, of course they want you,” I whisper, lacing my fingers through his.
He lets out a small laugh. “I know that now. It took a long time, but I learned. The guys never gave up. It was weird as hell coming into a house with so many other guys. Ironically, I was more concerned with the guys calling themselves my brothers than I was with the fact I now had two dads. I didn’t know their stories, and I didn’t really give a damn either. They lived in a perfect house and appeared to be the perfect family. Then, about six months after I got here, Talen got hurt because of me.”
I gasp, but don’t dare say a word. I want him to tell me what happened, and if I say anything, he may get distracted.
“It wasn’t a big deal once he got checked out, but we didn’t know that at the time. He was climbing the side of the house, trying to show off his skills for me. He wanted to impress me into liking him. He wanted me to want to be his brother. Anyway, I let him. I walked away and didn’t tell anyone about his antics. He ended up falling off the second story. He could have died, and it would have been on me. He ended up with a broken arm and a bump on the head. He was a lucky little shit.”
The urge to run and check on Talen nearly overwhelms me, but I stay put. I need to hear the rest of Lochlan’s story. I give his hand a reassuring squeeze, and he continues. “I talked to him when he woke up in the hospital. I told him he was a fucking idiot for climbing up the side of the house like a damn monkey. I told him I’d kick his ass next time he tried anything reckless like that again. I said I wasn’t going to lose my brother just because he didn’t have common sense.”
“Was he upset?” I ask, unable to stop the question from tumbling out.
Lochlan snickers. “No, the fucker was giddy. He was way too happy that I called him my brother. I think Talen was the first to discover that I’m perpetually grouchy. It’s just how I am. It took the others a while to adjust to that little fact about me. I also learned later that my father gave up custody of me to Jack, Maggie, and Collin easily.”
I turn my body and rest my head on Lochlan’s shoulder, but keep my eyes on him. “Where is your father now?”
He shrugs his large shoulder. “He’s been in and out of jails all over the country to be honest. I think the last we heard, he was serving a ten-year sentence in Georgia. Who knows, though. I don’t much care where he is. Collin and Jack taught me what a real father is supposed to be like, and I never want anything to do with my birth father again. He’s not a nice guy, never will be. He’s not my father, he’s just the guy who helped create me. Collin is my dad, Jack is my pop. That’s how it will always be for me.”
I nod against his shoulder, looking up when I sense his eyes on me. “Thank you for telling me, Lochlan. I know it wasn’t easy for you.”
“I don’t get how we got so damn lucky,” he mumbles, pushing my hair away from my eyes. “You’re too good for us, Parker.”
“I’m not.” My brow scrunches at his words. Of course, I’m not too good for them. If anything it’s the other way around. I don’t deserve this family.
He shakes his head, not saying anything more. His eyes dip down to my lips, then back up again. Warmth fills my belly and I wonder if he wants to kiss me as much as I’m dying to kiss him. They flicker between my eyes and lips a few times before he lowers his head and presses his lips against mine briefly.
I gasp against his mouth. Partly in surprise and partly because of how much I like the feel of his mouth on mine. I’m not sure he knows this is my first kiss. He’s making it perfect, and I wouldn’t change it for anything.
“Promise you won’t give up on us,” Lochlan whispers, barely pulling away from my mouth. “Things might get crazy soon, but we all care about you so damn much. So please, just don’t give up on me, on us.”
I blink in surprise, not understanding his words. “I’d never give up on you, Lochlan. I wouldn’t give up on any of you, I promise.”
Lochlan nods slightly, a gentle smile turning up the corners of his mouth as he leans down and kisses me softly again. My mind becomes consumed by Lochlan and his kisses, but there’s a nagging thought trying to push its way forward. What would the other guys say if they saw me kissing Lochlan? Would they be mad if they find out?
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
Dear Journal,
My first kiss. I hadn’t put much thought into what it would be like, but Lochlan made it perfect. I didn’t expect him to kiss me; I didn’t think he liked me that way. Maybe he still doesn’t? I just don’t know anymore. It’s all so confusing. I like Lochlan, a lot. But I like Talen and Dominic and Declan and Duncan just as much. That makes me a whore, doesn’t it? I mean, sure, Maggie has two husbands, but she doesn’t have five. It’s just wishful thinking on my part that all five of them would want me. I’m sure of it, but Austyn maintains his belief they’re interested in me.
My head hurts just thinking about all of this. I don’t want to hurt anyone. This family, these guys, they mean too much to me. I think the best way to fix things is to try and avoid them, but I don’t know if I can do that.
Today is the day Talen and I are going to the aquarium. He won’t tell me what the special event is that’s going on, but he promised me I will love it. I trust him. I just hope I don’t mess up the relationship between the guys by doing something stupid.
“Ready to go, Parker?” Talen asks, poking his head around the door frame to my room.
I shut my journal, shoving it under my pillow and stand with a smile. “I think so. Is this okay to wear to an aquarium?” I glance down at my converse shoes, dark jeans, and grey v-neck shirt. Simple and functional is what I decided on when getting dressed this morning.
Talen steps into my room, taking a few long strides to place himself in front of me. “You look perfect.”
The way his eyes heat up sends shivers through my body, and I lean closer to him. His hands come to rest on my hips, and he smiles gently down at me, pulling me the small distance it takes to have our bodies touching. Being this close to him has my body on fire, but it’s a good burn. It’s familiar to me now, after experiencing the same sensations when the other guys touch me or hold me in their own ways.
Thinking about the others snaps me back to my goal of keeping the guys at a distance, and I shake myself out of my Talen fog, stepping away from him. “Um”—I clear my throat and chew my thumb nail— “should we go?”
Talen blinks at me a few times before his brow draws together in confusion. He doesn’t say anything. He simply nods and follows me from the room and to the car. The ride to the aquarium is silent, which is normally comfortable with Talen. However, this time the silence is heavy and awkward to me. I didn’t mean to upset him, but I don’t know what I’m doing. I’m too afraid of messing things up to do what I want to do.
“Come on, Parker,” Talen murmurs, pulling me from my inner turmoil. “We don’t want to be late for the surprise.”
We get out of the car, and Talen starts to reach for my hand, but stops himself and shoves his hands into his pockets. I can’t stand him being upset. I don’t want to hurt or upset the others, but Talen is right here in front of me. I can at least try to make things better with him for now.
Taking a deep breath, I link my arm with his. My cheeks burn with my bold move, but the smile lighting up his face tells me I did the right thing. He takes his hand from his pocket and puts it around me, tucking me to his side. He makes me giddy, and I feel cared for when he holds onto me like this. I can’t stop myself from melting into hi
m, and his smile widens as I do. Talen’s my strong peace keeper. He always finds a way to make me comfortable and happy.
“Will you tell me the surprise before we go in?” I watch him hopefully.
He eyes me for a second as we wait in line, and then shakes his head with a grin. “I can’t say no to you. We’re going to feed seals and otters. I arranged it ahead of time so we can be in there with the trainers.”
“I get to feed otters! Real live ones?” I bounce up and down on my toes, not believing I really get to be up close to adorable otters and seals.
Talen nods. “They’ll let you hold the new baby otter, too,” he informs me, chuckling when I squeal with excitement. “I’m glad you’re excited, Beautiful. Let’s go have some fun.”
We spend a full hour playing with and feeding the seals and otters. Our time comes to an end too soon, and the trainers make us leave. Talen doesn’t let me mope around for long. Soon we’re walking through a butterfly exhibit where colorful butterflies land all over us. I manage to snap a picture of Talen with a butterfly on his nose. We walk the rest of the aquarium, taking pictures of sharks and clownfish, and plugging our noses as we watch flamingos walk around their area.
“I never realized how smelly flamingos are.” I cough, still covering my nose. “They’re stinky little suckers.”
“Yeah, they really are.” Talen laughs, dropping his hand from his nose. “I remember thinking the same thing on my first trip to the zoo. They didn’t have them at the aquarium I went to the first time.”
“When was your first trip?” I ask, snuggling into his side as he slides his arm around my shoulders.
He sighs and shrugs. “It’s kind of a strange and long story.”
“We’ve got time if you want to tell me,” I coax, my curiosity flaring.
“When I was ten years old, my parents were murdered by my aunt,” he explains. I gasp in horror and turn my body around in his arms to face him, stopping us both in our tracks. I didn’t expect him to say something like this at all. Though, I don’t dare say a word, fearing I might say the wrong thing. “She tried to kill me, too, but she didn’t succeed. My aunt got life in jail, and I haven’t seen or heard from her since. It was some twisted jealousy thing because my mom had a husband and kid and a decent home.
“Anyway, I went to the hospital. I had to be there for a long time, and I don’t remember much from the first few days. I do remember the social worker I had. She was kind and welcoming. She didn’t treat me like I was trouble, and she never pushed me for information on what happened. I never wanted her to find out because I didn’t want her to look at me differently, unkindly. What kind of person has an aunt who would do such a horrible thing? That’s what I thought at the time anyway.
“Her sons came around one day. She couldn’t find a sitter, but she had promised to stop by and see me. She didn’t want to break her promise. One of them wouldn’t leave me alone even when I asked him to. He talked constantly. He sat with me, chattering away about his brothers and how I would really like them. I told him I had no siblings. It was the start of me telling him about my past, my father and mother, and the life I had growing up. Maggie heard all of it from the hallway, though I didn’t know that at the time. Later that day, she told me that when I was released I would be going home with her, Duncan, and Declan.”
“Declan was the one who wouldn’t leave you alone? Maggie was your social worker?” I ask, a small smile forming at his happy ending.
He shakes head, and his lips twitch up slightly. “It was Duncan actually. He’s pushy, but he’s my brother. Of course I loved my parents, but Maggie, Jack, and Collin are my adopted parents and I naturally slipped into calling them Mom, Dad, and Pop. I wouldn’t change my family for the world.” He pauses and searches my face. “That includes you, Parker. No matter what, I wouldn’t change you for the world.”
A blush stains my cheeks as Talen continues. “Maggie used to be a social worker, obviously. It’s when she first started fostering. When she took me in, I was ten. I’d mentioned for my birthday the following week my parents had promised I’d go to the zoo.”
“They took you?” I guess, a smile tickling my lips at the image of a tiny Talen on his birthday.
“Yeah,” he confirms, hugging me tightly. “They took me and the rest of my new brothers. It took me a long time to recover from losing my parents, but finding Austyn helped a lot.”
“Finding Austyn?” I ask, not understanding.
Talen throws his head back and laughs loudly. “He never told you how we found the little monkey?”
“Nope.” I can’t hide my burning curiosity. “What happened?”
“For my birthday every year, my parents take me to the zoo. It’s just a tradition now. For my twelfth birthday, it was the same as the year prior. I’d started to come to terms with the fact that my birth parents were never coming back, and I was healing. Maggie, Jack, and Collin never forced me to call them mom or dad or pop. It came natural after a while, like I said.
“Austyn was part of social services from birth,” he explains. “He’d run away a lot from his foster homes, though. We were there for my birthday visit, and there was a commotion in the monkey exhibit. We went to see what was happening and found Austyn there. He insisted he was a monkey and that’s where he was staying.”
“No.” I gasp, covering my mouth to hold in my laughter.
“Yes.” Talen laughs. “The best part is no one could get him out. They couldn’t catch him. Imagine a little six-year-old climbing trees and yelling like a monkey. My mom and dads told him he could stay with us if he came out. He never left after that. Mom said she was raising monkeys anyway, what’s one more added to the group.”
“You guys both got your happy ending,” I murmur, almost to myself as I think of how lucky they are to have the family they do. The one I’m now part of.
Talen’s eyes spark as his expression turns serious. “Nearly there, Parker. Nearly there.”
My cheeks darken again, and I tuck my chin to hide my blush. Talen takes hold of my hand as we continue touring the aquarium without another word about Talen’s past or Austyn.
“This was the coolest day ever.” I sigh, leaning into Talen as we walk to the parking lot. “Thank you, Talen. It was more fun than I ever thought I could have at an aquarium.”
“Anything for you, Parker,” he promises me, quickly kissing the top of my head.
His words hold a deeper promise than my mind is able to fully comprehend right now. Talen didn’t take his hands off me the entire day. Some part of him was always touching me. The gentle touches mixed with the amazing time we experienced today solidify my feelings for him. There’s no way I can deny he means to me as much as Lochlan, Declan, Dominic, and Duncan do.
“Parker?” Talen’s quiet voice breaks me from my musings, and I look up at him, raising an eyebrow in question.
“Hmm?”
“Are you okay?” He frowns.
I nod and smile up at him. His frown remains in place as he regards me. “Are you?”
I stop walking and set the bag of souvenirs down. Silly boy refused to leave the place without making me pick out my favorite little trinkets. I couldn’t help but get a stuffed flamingo for Greyson. I hope he likes it.
Talen pulls me into his arms, hugging me tightly and lifting me off the ground. “Never better, Beautiful.” He murmurs against my hair as I savor being in his arms. “I’m glad you had fun. I’ll bring you here again.”
I lean back and grin wildly at him. “I can’t wait to go out with you again.” My comment is innocent, at least I meant for it to be. But it sends a shiver of excitement through me at the thought of going on a real date with him some day. One where I hug him and kiss him without worry of what he may think my intentions are.
The idea of kissing him causes my eyes to dart to his full, perfect lips. It fills me with a sense of pride knowing I put such a bright smile on them. I want to put more than a smile there, though. Without conscious pl
anning as to what I’m doing, I lean closer to him, a shuddered breath escaping me. His eyes widen as my tongue darts out, licking my lips. He takes quick action, leaning down to press his mouth to mine.
I gasp in surprise, but I notice him give me the chance to pull away. Instead, my arms tighten around his neck. My reaction assures him deepening the kiss is okay. His tongue slides along the seam of my lips, and I readily open for him. It’s probably crystal clear in the way I follow his lead I’m not exactly experienced in this, and it’s surprising how sexy I find his slight dominance over the kiss.
I pull back, panting and trying to catch my breath. Talen gives me a few more soft kisses on the lips, then one on my nose, then my forehead before allowing my body to slide against his until my feet hit the ground. I shake slightly. My eyes shine bright, and my cheeks burn hot.
“You okay?” Talen whispers, not letting go of my hips even after I stop wobbling. “Was it okay that I kissed you?”
I nod slowly, staring at him with wide eyes, nervous and excited at the same time. I really need someone to talk to about this. I have no idea what to do right now.
“Hey,” Talen murmurs, pressing his lips to the top of my head. “Don’t worry, everything will be fine. I promise.”
I don’t answer, but my body relaxes slightly as I allow him to pull me the rest of the way to the car. The ride home is a comfortable silence, unlike the ride to the aquarium. Talen holds my hand the entire way. As juvenile as it sounds, I find it amazing, and I never want to let go.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
DUNCAN
“This is horse shit!” Lochlan yells, pacing the room and muttering curse words. “A damned disaster! So fucked up! Un-fucking-believable!”
“Okay, Lochlan.” Dad sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “We all understand how you feel about the situation, and we feel the same. Though, we’re not as loud about it. Your temper isn’t going to fix the issue.”