by Quinn Loftis
Peri waved her off. “When you live for thousands of years, a fifty year leave of absence is like a two-week vacation.
Alina nodded. “Guess I can see that.”
Cyn looked down at her hands. She remembered that five decades-long hiatus like it was yesterday. She’d spent the entire time in Farie. She was scared that if she left her realm, she’d run into him. She had to regain control of her emotions. She didn’t want to turn into an emotional blubbering female who batted her eyelashes and blushed at a mere glance from a male, even if he was the prince of the elves. Every time Cyn had been around Thalion, she’d come very close to doing those things. It didn’t sit well with her. She knew then that she had to cut off any possibility that she would see him, at least until her feelings toward him had faded.
“What did you do during that time?” Alina asked.
“I did a lot of meditation.”
“That’s code for I sat on my ever-enlarging backside and did nothing,” Peri quipped.
Cyn shot her a look. “Some of us understand the power behind meditation. Just because you don’t understand it, doesn’t mean it doesn’t work.”
“Pray tell, what was the purpose for the meditation?” the high fae asked.
“Discipline. It takes discipline to sit and empty your mind.”
Alina nodded. “There are lots of studies done on the health benefits of meditation. It can lower blood pressure, help the immune system, and reduce anxiety.”
“All things that drastically affect the fae race,” Peri said dryly.
“You may not have the health issues, but that doesn’t mean you don’t experience stress or anxiety,” Alina pointed out.
“Who invited the voice of reason into our circle?” Peri asked as she folded her arms across her chest.
“You did, actually,” said Cyn. “In fact, you drug her from her bed.”
“Details, details.”
Alina looked at Cyn. “Did the meditation help?”
Cyn shook her head. “It was like he was in my blood. No matter what I did, I couldn’t get him out of my system.” She pinched the bridge of her nose and squeezed her eyes closed tightly. “Every time I closed my eyes, I saw him. In the quiet of the night, I heard his voice in my ear.”
“They have medicine for that,” Peri told her.
Alina laughed. “Do you ever stop?”
“What? Being amazing?” the high fae asked.
“You say amazing, the rest of creation says annoying. It’s semantics really.” Alina tossed back.
Peri tapped her chin with a long, thin finger. “I want to be annoyed with you, but any time someone insults me with something I deem worthy of the breath it took to say it, it’s hard to hold a grudge.”
Cyn grinned. “Your reasoning never ceases to amaze me.”
“See.” Peri looked at Alina while pointing at Cyn. “Amaze. I amaze her.”
Cyn shook her head at the Alpha female. “Just let her have this one.”
Alina chuckled. “Good idea.”
“Back to the five decades-long sulking,” Peri prompted. “What made you decide it was time to come out of retirement?”
Cyn narrowed her eyes at Peri. “You don’t remember?”
“Since then I’ve saved the world, dealt with a bat-shit-crazy witch, and endured the company of wolves and teenage girls, at the same time. I’ve also discovered that I am mated to one of those annoying wolves. Cut me some slack if I don’t remember the time when you were sulking in the forest and talking to the dandelions about your confused emotions.” Peri practically growled.
“Fine.” Cyn relented. “I won’t hold it against you. Although I don’t know how you could forget dragging me by my ankles across said dandelion field all the while griping about not having to do everything yourself.”
Peri’s face lit up. “Oh, that’s right! Good times, Cyn, good times.”
“Where did she drag you?” Alina asked.
“Would you like to tell her?” Cyn asked her comrade.
Peri cackled. “Now that I know the story behind it, it’s so freaking funny.”
“Not funny, Perizada. Not funny at all.” Cyn deadpanned.
“I literally dropped her off at the front door of the one place that she was trying to avoid—the palace that housed her man. Of course I didn’t know he was her man at the time,” Peri said, waving her hand absently. “I told her she needed to get in there and change the prince’s mind by any means necessary.”
“Why?” Alina asked, her face scrunched up in confusion.
“I had a little birdy tell me that difficult times were coming. I knew we were going to need all the supernaturals we could get to be a united front. The prince was being a pompous ass and, at the time, I thought my stoic little warrior would be able to beat some sense into him. Apparently it was a totally different kind of beating she had in mind.” Peri cracked herself up, practically falling over in laughter.
Cyn cut Alina a sharp look when the female Alpha began to laugh. Alina quickly covered her mouth and attempted to turn it into a cough. “You have to admit that was pretty funny,” Alina said, her eyes twinkling with humor.
“I refuse to encourage her idiocy with compliments of her humor.”
“That’s the Cyn we know and love.” Peri hooted.
“So what happened after she dropped you off?” Alina asked.
Cyn cleared her throat as she brushed her hair back away from her face. “Well, I’ll have to set the scene for you to fully appreciate it. You see, it was a dark and stor—”
“No.” Peri cut her off, holding up her hand. “Just. No.”
Cyn laughed. “Okay, fine. It wasn’t a dark and stormy night. It was late in the evening though, so it was almost dark. I stood at the door to the palace, cursing a certain high fae, when suddenly the small door to the right of the large gate opened. I was truly hoping it would be a butler or something. But no. My life couldn’t be that easy. There he stood, in all his glory, looking as angry as a wet hen.”
“Look who decided to show up.” Thalion’s voice filled her mind as the memory took shape and reality slipped away.
“Thalion,” Cyn said, hoping she sounded cordial rather than breathless. The smug look on his face, however, led her to believe it was the latter that he heard.
“Please.” He motioned for her to enter. “Come in. To what do I owe the honor of your company?”
Cyn took several tentative steps forward, attempting to skirt past him into the palace. Her goal had been to keep from touching him, but the prince had other plans. He moved closer to her just as she passed him, causing her shoulder to rub against his firm chest. Stupid prince, she mentally grumbled.
“Perizada sent me,” Cyn told him.
“Why didn’t she come herself?” he asked her.
“Because she’s Perizada and does whatever the hell she wants to.” Cyn slapped her hand over her mouth when she realized what had slipped out.
Thalion chuckled. “I take it you aren’t happy to be here?”
Cyn felt bad for being so rude, but she didn’t want to let her guard down. She was pretty sure if she did, she’d end up letting him kiss her. That is … if he still wanted to kiss her. What if he didn’t want to kiss her anymore? Wait, why did she care? She was supposed to be trying to avoid any feelings toward the prince. Easier said than done, apparently.
“We are asking you to reconsider your position on the matter we previously discussed.”
“Five decades ago?” Thalion interrupted, sounding none too pleased.
She cleared her throat. “Yes, five decades ago.”
“Where, exactly, have you been for the past fifty years, Cyn?”
“I’ve had responsibilities to attend to,” she answered, looking everywhere but at him.
“Were you avoiding me?”
“Why would I do that? I would have to care about you in order to expend the energy to try to avoid you.”
Thalion took a step closer to her. Cyn was sur
e he loved crowding her and watching her squirm under his attention.
“Why don’t I believe you, beautiful?” he asked softly.
“Perhaps you have an inflated view of yourself. Perhaps you think the world revolves around you. Perhaps you think that everyone else in the world makes their decisions based upon where they are in relationship to you,” Cyn offered as she took a discrete step back. She didn’t make it another step before Thalion had wrapped her in his arms, pulling her tightly against him.
“I’ve missed you and your insults,” he whispered against her ear as he buried his face in her neck.
Cyn didn’t know what to do. Her body was stiff with surprise, but part of her brain was screaming at her to wrap her arms around him and sink into his warmth. She couldn’t let that happen. She must not allow herself to give in to emotions that would distract her from her task. Cyn had been born a warrior, plain and simple. She’d never known any other lifestyle. Ever since she could walk, she’d been conditioned to believe the sole purpose in her existence was to protect and serve her own race, as well as any others that the council commanded. She was a servant to her people. She didn’t have the luxury of having romantic relationships, especially not with the prince of a completely different race.
Cyn felt his hand glide slowly up her spine until his strong fingers were wrapped around the back of her neck. Her breathing had increased, and she was pretty sure a pack of wild boar was attempting to do the cha-cha in her stomach. Why did he affect her this way? In all her centuries of life, Cyn had never been brought to her knees by the touch of a male. Yet there she stood, in Thalion’s arms, and had he not been supporting her, she’d have been a puddle on the ground.
“Didn’t you miss me?” he mumbled, his face still pressed close to her neck.
Cyn nearly laughed when he added, in a voice that sounded much too pouty for a grown man, “Even a little?”
She had missed him. She’d missed him so much at times that it hurt to breathe. There hadn’t been a day that had gone by when Cyn hadn’t thought of the prince of the elves. No night had passed without his face consuming her dreams. He was everywhere and nowhere at the same time, and she’d felt as if she were going mad.
“I need to know your answer, sir,” she said, drawing the discussion back to business—a topic she was much more comfortable with.
“I’ll answer your questions if you answer mine.”
“Games? Again?” Cyn asked.
He shrugged. “I like to play with you.”
Deciding that if she ever wanted him to release her she’d have to go along with him, she gave him her answer. “I did.”
He froze. Thalion’s hands stopped the kneading and petting, and his chest no longer moved up and down from his breathing. It was as if time itself had stopped and he’d stopped with it. Cyn pulled back to look up at him and her breath caught. The look of longing on his face was painful to see.
“You did what?” He finally exhaled and asked.
Cyn bit her bottom lip. “I did miss you.” There. She’d said it. Now they could finally get on with the business at—her thoughts were completely derailed when Thalion’s lips took possession of hers. He was like a starved man being set before a huge feast.
Cyn knew she should push him away. She should put an end to the madness and force him to understand they can never happen. That’s what she should do, but her body and her heart weren’t listening. So instead, Cyn wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled herself more tightly against him. She had yearned for his touch. Cyn had been haunted by his scent and the memory of the sound of his voice. On more than one occasion, she sworn she could feel his breath on her neck, only to turn and see no one there. But he was there now. She felt his flesh and blood beneath her fingers as her hands slid up his neck and into his hair. Going against everything she knew to be true, Cyn let herself get lost in the moment, get lost in him.
Thalion’s fingers explored the contours of her face as his lips continued to coax and seduce hers. He traced her jaw, down her neck, and across her collarbone, eliciting a gasp which allowed him to deepen the kiss. It wasn’t until his other hand had managed to push her top up in the back and press against her flesh that she finally was snatched back to reality. She knew the minute he realized that she was backing away because of his groan.
“No.” He practically growled. “Don’t leave again.” His eyes bore down into hers, the weight of all of his emotions heavy in his gaze. “Beautiful, Cyn, do you not feel how right this is between us?” Thalion caressed her cheek, and she instinctively turned her face into his hand. “See how you respond to my touch? You come alive for me. Please do not walk away.”
“I need your answer,” she said after several minutes of silence. The mask was back in place, her emotions tucked neatly away behind the wall she kept between herself and the rest of the world. She had a duty, and Thalion was not a part of that plan.
His jaw clenched as his eyes hardened into cold stones of ice. He stepped back, and the loss of his closeness sent a chill through her. Thalion’s hands balled into fists at his sides as he pulled his shoulders back and rose to his full height. “My answer stands the same. I will assume yours does as well.” He turned his back to her and began walking. He was walking away from her.
Cyn fought the urge to call out to him. It took everything in her, but the separation needed to happen. Whatever attachment they’d formed, it needed to be broken. As she flashed from the palace, she felt the tears pool in her eyes and cursed each one as they began a trail down her face.
“Stop the train.” Perizada’s voice penetrated the memories of Cyn’s past that had surrounded her. “He walked away?” She glared at Cyn as if she’d been the one slighted. “Who the crap does that?”
“Walk away?” Alina asked. “Everyone does that.”
Peri snapped her finger at the Alpha female. “Don’t justify his behavior because everyone else does it.”
“Really?” Alina cocked an eyebrow at the high fae.
Cyn jumped in before Peri could do something she’d regret. She knew how emotional Peri could get, even if others didn’t realize it. She was extremely loyal to those she claimed and didn’t like for them to be hurt. “Peri, he was frustrated,” Cyn reasoned. “I thought he was giving up too. I thought that was what I wanted.”
“You weren’t relieved?” Alina asked.
Cyn shook her head. “A part of me that I didn’t want to admit existed hoped that he would never give up. I thought we couldn’t be together, but it killed me to think of him with someone else.” She turned to Peri. “When you told me I had to go to him, I experienced nausea for the first time in my life. The thought of seeing him smitten with someone else was almost too much. I nearly disobeyed an order.”
Peri’s mouth dropped open and closed. “You never disobey orders.” She shook her head. “You were gone over him even then.”
Cyn couldn’t deny it.
“And yet, after that encounter, when did you see him next?” Alina asked.
Cyn smirked. “The next time was only two and a half decades later, but by then I was done crying. I had moved on to being angry.”
Peri chuckled. “This ought to be good.”
Cyn laughed. “It was the time you sent me to get weapons and training from him.”
“Did you actually stab him this time?” Alina asked.
Cyn’s eyes danced as a small smile curved on her lips. “I wouldn’t really call it a stab. More like a gentle thrust.”
Peri’s cackle rang out through the quiet night. “Where is Jen when I need her? Gentle thrust. Oh man, that is good, and only topped by the fact that you, serious Cyn, are the one who said it.” Her laughter died but she continued to shake her head. “Gentle thrust. Classic.”
Chapter 10
“In my long existence, I have come to the conclusion that there is absolutely nothing sexier than the woman I love holding a dagger against my neck while denying her desire for me.” ~ Thalion
Thalion nodded, his face tight with the emotions he’d felt on that day. After having not seen her for fifty years, their reunion had been hot and brief like a flash of lightning. He’d tried to coax her to stay, but he knew that if he ever wanted to capture Cyn’s heart, she’d have to give it willingly. Walking away from her, not knowing when he’d see her again, had been the hardest thing he’d ever done.
“She wasn’t ready,” Thalion finally said. “Her body responded to me, and even her heart and soul, but all Cyn listened to was her mind. Duty before love. She’s a warrior. It’s how she’d been raised to think. I was frustrated, and I knew that if I stayed any longer I would just become angrier. So I backed off.”
“How much time passed that time, before you saw her again?”
Thalion sighed. “Twenty-five very long years. They almost felt longer than the five decades had.”
Reeve chuckled. “You knew that she belonged with you. In your mind she was already yours. Not being with her didn’t make sense to your heart.”
“You’re right. I couldn’t reconcile why the woman I loved wasn’t waking up in my arms every morning or kissing me every night.”
“I think I remember this time period.” Reeve scratched his head. “You were very volatile. No one wanted to spar with you.”
Thalion couldn’t help but chuckle. He had been quite unbearable to be around. “The one person I wanted to see was the one person that never showed up. It was maddening.”
“But I do remember a certain fae warrior who wasn’t afraid to spar with you. When she appeared to fight you, I take it that was the end of the three-year drought?”
He chuckled at the sharp look Thalion sent him.
“You did look like a man deprived of water before she showed up. When you saw her standing there, it was as if the skies had opened up and rained down upon you.”