“Mmm.” Jeff nodded.
“Well, Greg got the idea to invest in a racehorse. At first Travis ranted like the father of the bride at a shotgun wedding. The frivolousness of it all. I mean who spends all their savings on a racehorse? Especially when money was so tight. But it wasn’t the firm’s money, so Travis had to hold his tongue.”
“How’d that work?”
“Not so good.”
“What happened?”
“Nothing in particular. But the tension was growing.”
Jeff’s stomach flipped. That earlier odd sensation nearly had him gripped by the throat. What was he missing? “Wasn’t this Greg the guy who saved you?”
Pam nodded, dropped her gaze to the floor, and took a deep breath. “I can’t go there. Not now.”
“Sorry.” He pulled his hands from his pockets, stepped to the side and waved an arm toward the living room. When Pam brushed passed him, the urge to reach out, grab her, and pull her against him shot through him like a rocket. Quickly, he shoved his hands back in his pockets. If he dared touch her, he’d have to kiss her, and he knew as sure as his name was Jefferson Davis Parker that if he did that, this time he wouldn’t stop.
Halfway to the sofa, the doorbell rang. From over Pam’s shoulder he could see the tall good-looking kid. Well, at twenty-two Kenny probably couldn’t be called a kid anymore.
“May I help you?” Pam asked.
“You must be Pammy Sue. I’m Kenny Parker. My mother gave me this to bring over. Said you two needed real food.” Holding a covered casserole, Kenny stuck both arms straight out passing the dish off to Pam, then turned to his brother and flashed the Parker smile. “I’m not even going to ask why I’ve been given strict instructions not to leave this house until you do. But out of curiosity, would it have anything to do with why Mrs. McCarthy is at our kitchen table talking wedding plans with Mom?”
Kenny wasn’t sure whose mouth came closest to hitting the floor. “Do you two need to sit?”
Pammy Sue seemed to struggle to snap her jaw shut before offering a weak nod. Jeff on the other hand looked ready to swoop Pammy Sue off her feet and carry her away to heaven-knows-where. Though the bedroom struck him as a pretty strong contender.
Hands in his pocket, Jeff followed Pam to the sofa, started to sit beside her when, halfway to the cushion, he straightened and moved over a place. Interesting.
Kenny took the seat opposite the sofa. “Let me take a stab at this. Are we talking shotgun wedding?”
“No!” Two voices echoed.
“It’s not what you’re thinking.” Jeff let out a heavy sigh. “It’s all a misunderstanding.”
Pammy Sue whipped her head around, gaze locking onto his brother Jeff.
How could this man be so much older than him and such an idiot?
“I made an error in judgment, and the church board has asked for my resignation.”
“Ooh.” Ken winced. “I’ll take the short version, please.”
By the time Jeff and Pammy Sue finished recounting the last twenty-four hours, Kenny thought he had a pretty good picture of what was going on. “I know as the youngest Parker my opinion doesn’t count for much, but I gotta admit, I’m with Mrs. McCarthy on this one. If you announce your plans to tie the knot, then there’s no fuel for the gossip. Besides, any moron can see you two are crazy about each other.”
“I’m married,” Pammy Sue muttered. And Kenny thought he could see a piece of his brother’s heart break off and whither.
“You mean were married?” Kenny asked.
Pam looked flustered—or was it startled? If he didn’t know better, the way her eyes momentarily rounded before her brow creased to form a perfect V, he’d swear he’d just told the woman something she didn’t know.
“It doesn’t matter.” Jeff sprang up from his seat, his hand rubbing the back of his neck. “I’m leaving the church anyway. Going back to the climbing the corporate ladder.”
“You can’t!” Pammy Sue bolted to his side.
“You don’t understand.”
“Try me.”
“This town needs my Dad, not me.”
“Mrs. McCarthy doesn’t think so. She and your mom concocted a plan to change the board’s mind.”
“They what?”
“They came up with a plan for a few well-placed phone calls. That's what they came over to tell us.”
Jeff’s face pinched as though he’d swallowed a mouthful of sour milk. “I’ll talk to them. I know how mom can be on a crusade.”
Kenny knew exactly what his brother was talking about. Their mom on a mission was worse than a pit bull on a steak bone, but his dear big brother was missing the point here. Though he had little doubt Mom and Dad both would face their worst fears to save Jeff’s job at the church, Kenny was willing to bet his degree that his mother’s primary mission involved a church wedding, not a church office.
“Jeff.” Pam’s hand rested on Jeff’s forearm.
“I’m sorry.” Jeff closed his eyes a fraction longer than a blink. “I don’t know how to fix this.”
“Get married.” Kenny leaned back and crossed his arms. “Seems to make sense to everyone except you two.”
Pam and Jeff shot him a stunned glare that screamed What planet are you from?
“Hear me out.” He raised his hand to silence the impending argument. “And feel free to correct me, if I get anything wrong. There are several reasons why people get married, and most often there are a completely different set of reasons people stay married.”
Jeff didn’t flinch; Pam gave a weak nod.
“We’ll start with love, desire, sex, security, friendship, and probably another dose of sex and desire.”
“Little brother—”
“I said hear me out. Then you have trust, friendship, love, respect, comfort, companionship, did I mention love?”
Pam nodded; Jeff glared.
“Feel free to tell me which one of those does not apply to you. Because from where I’m standing, you have the flash fire to get you to the altar and the steady flame to keep you there.”
“You don’t understand,” Jeff took a step back, away from Pam’s touch.
“No.” Kenny waved an arm at his brother. “Don’t pull away. Stand next to her. Take her hand in yours. Better yet, hold her in your arms, then look me in the eye and tell me you don’t want this woman in the rest of your life.”
“My life is going to change. I’ll be starting over in a new career. An inexperienced old man competing with bright young minds. Somewhere far enough away where people don’t think of me as the wayward pastor.” Jeff turned his attention to his brother. “Pam came home to Hope’s Corner looking for peace and to be close to her family. She needs that safe harbor and help, professional help, to finally put her past behind her. Not more upheaval. I’m not the man she needs. Not now.”
“I didn’t hear you don’t want her.” Kenny quirked an eyebrow at his big brother.
“Of course he wants me. He’s a man. What man doesn’t want sex?” Pam sank onto the nearby sofa.
“Is that what all of this is about?” Kenny directed his question to Pam.
Her cheeks turned pink, and her gaze dropped, but she didn’t respond.
Jeff shifted in her direction before stopping in place. “I told you, Kenny. It’s just a blown-out-of-proportion misunderstanding.”
“Is that it?” Kenny kept his gaze on Pam.
“Just a misunderstanding,” she repeated.
Their mom made it look so easy. One well-placed lecture and all shifted as it should be. He doubted a lead pipe could knock any sense into these two. Maybe he should just go home and let nature have a shot at them? “Well, if that’s all there is to it, then I guess there’s no reason I can’t go home.”
“You should go with him.” Pam stood and smiled at Jeff. “I wouldn’t want to give Etta Mae anything else to worry about.”
“What about you? Are you okay?” Jeff took a half step, then stopped short, again, a
nd shoved his hands in his pockets, again.
“I’m good. Really I am. I’m sure by tomorrow everyone will come to their senses.”
And pigs will fly. Kenny resisted the urge to roll his eyes.
Jeff hitched a shoulder, hands still in his pockets. “If you’re sure?”
“Positive.” Pam nodded and smiled a little brighter.
“I’ll check on you tomorrow then?”
“Sure.”
“Okay, then. Tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow.”
Good heavens, this could go on all night. How old was his big brother? “We’d better get going before Mom and Mrs. McCarthy reserve the church.”
“God, don’t remind me.” Jeff spun around and moved toward the door at a quick clip. Pulling open the door, he paused to glance back at Pam. “Lock the door behind me.”
This time her smile seemed more genuine. “Good night.”
On the front porch Jeff turned to his brother. “How bad is it?”
“Is what?”
“Mom and Mrs. McCarthy?”
“That depends.”
“On what?”
“Do you believe in long or short honeymoons?”
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Abigail Clarke was laughing so hard, Pam feared the woman might burst a blood vessel. “I fail to see what’s so funny.”
“Grilled cheese without the cheese. I’d like to meet this Euphemia McCarthy.”
Pam smiled. “I suppose, if she weren’t talking about me, I might find some humor in the analogy.”
“That’s my girl. Laugh lines show a life well lived. Worry lines mean too much of life was wasted. You shouldn’t fret so.”
“I can’t help it. This whole mess is all my fault.” Pam dipped her french fry in ketchup and took a bite.
“I suppose trouble, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. Some folks see trouble coming and think only of the challenges. Others see the opportunities. Though I suppose in some ways, it does feel like learning to drive.”
“Excuse me?”
“Getting married. When you learn to drive, you find yourself behind the wheel of this big ominous machine with no idea how to operate it. There’s a long road ahead of you, yet you have no idea where it’s taking you. But you know if you ride the clutch or grind the gears, or any other number of mistakes, you can do serious damage. Same with marriage. The future is open to you, yet any number of mistakes along the way can leave people hurt. Lots to worry about if you let yourself dwell on the unknowns.”
“I never worried about marrying Travis.” She swallowed the last fry and shoved the crumpled wrappings from her lunchtime burger into the paper bag.
“Children don’t think ahead. You were barely more than a child the first time you got married.”
First time? The only time. There was only one man for Pam. One love of her life.
“Honey, you’re thinking too hard.” Abigail brushed her thumb across Pam’s brow until she felt her forehead relax. “My Edgar was a strong handsome man. I loved him with every fiber of my being. When Percival came courting after the incident with Judith Abernathy, I was horrified. No woman wants to marry a man to appease town gossip. But worse still, to betray the love of Edgar. I couldn’t do that.”
“But you did marry Percival.”
Abigail smiled. “I did. But I didn’t make it easy on the poor man. Daddy was furious with the entire situation. Being a man of his times, he thought it only right a girl should marry. Percival had asked for my hand, and Daddy was more than happy to get the wedding over with sooner than later. Didn’t make no never mind to him if the groom was only proposing out of a misplaced sense of duty. But it mattered to me.”
“I thought you said Percival had been working up the nerve to court you anyway?
“Oh, he said he was, but I didn’t believe him. I thought he was just being noble. Though I wouldn’t face it at the time, I’d already developed feelings for the man. I knew how good, and kind, and dear he was. It would have been just like him to put a woman’s reputation and honor before his own feelings and happiness. Yes, I knew he was a good man even then.”
Abigail smiled and for a few seconds Pam knew the older woman had gone off to someplace only she and Percival had ever been.
“Anyway.” Abigail rubbed her hands across her thighs and pushed to her feet. “Daddy and I reached a compromise. I’d let Percival court me proper, and Daddy would put away the shotgun. Every night Percival and David would have supper at our house. Then Daddy or one of my brothers would take David off to watch the horses, or some other chore they’d come up with, while Percival and I sat on the front porch. Sometimes we’d go into town to see the new picture show. Those nights were a big hoo-ha. Dinner out and all.
“As each week passed, something inside shifted. I knew it, felt it, but I refused to accept it. Loving Percival, giving him my all, could only mean that my love for Edgar wasn’t everything I’d believed it to be. A lie. I couldn’t live with that.”
The words sliced through Pam. A lie? She’d promised to love Travis for the rest of her life. She’d loved him with all her heart. That wasn’t a lie. It couldn’t be.
Taking a seat on the edge of the bed, Abigail held the silver-framed photo of her family. “I’d always wanted children. As my heart filled with more love for Percival, I thought maybe Edgar would forgive me if I married to have children. After all, Edgar loved me. He’d want to give me whatever made me happy. He’d want me to have children. I was starting to look for any justification I could. I hadn’t admitted it to myself yet, but deep down, I wanted to marry Percival. I wanted to be his wife in every way.”
“So you married him to have children?”
Abigail’s grin grew. “I married him because of children, but not to have children.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Sally Cooper.”
Pam waited, hands in her lap, her right hand twirling the gold band on her left ring finger.
“Sally and Benjamin Cooper were blessed with fertility. Nine young’uns in all. Right about the time Percival and I were courting, Sally’d given birth to number seven. Or was it eight? No matter. They were a good Christian family. Benjamin was a hard worker but feeding a family that size wore hard on a man. Those of us who had life a little easier would stop by and bring things to help out. Daddy had done some butchering. He gave me a side of pork to take over with a trinket for the new baby. Sally, being prideful and all, gave the expected objections, but in the end, she’d agreed that my Daddy had butchered more meat than our family could eat or store, and taking the extra food off our hands would save it from spoiling.”
“Your dad did that on purpose?”
“Daddy was as good a man as they came. He set the standard for the men in my life.” Abigail set the photo she’d been holding back in its place. “That baby was the cutest Cooper yet. They were all picture-perfect. Curly gold locks, big blue eyes, chubby cheeks, and grins that could win over the devil. I remember that day so clearly. The older children were at school. Most of the younger ones were napping in the other room. Little Becky came around the corner, her steps slow and minced. I guess you could call it a three-year-old’s version of tiptoeing. Her gaze shifted back and forth from her mama to the new baby. Sally didn’t say anything, but I knew she’d seen Becky sneaking up on her. When Becky finally stood beside the bed, Sally handed me the baby and patted her lap for Becky to climb up.
“That child’s face lit up like the afternoon sun. Sally held Becky tight in her arms and softly said, ‘Who do I love more than all the stars in the sky?’ Becky scrunched her face and almost whispered her response. ‘Me?’ Sally squeezed her little girl and smiled. ‘I love you more than all the stars in the sky forever and ever.’
“I didn’t think a grin could grow any brighter, but it did. Becky kissed her mama’s cheek, said, ‘I love you forever and ever too,’ and then scurried off to play. Sally watched me holding the baby for a long moment before she fin
ally said, ‘With every child my heart is so full of love, I wonder how can I possibly have any love left for another? But the heart is an amazing thing. It can hold more love than anybody can give.’ That’s when I realized the truth.”
“The truth?”
“I didn’t have to stop loving Edgar to let myself love Percival. There’d be no dishonor in moving on. Little Becky and her mom helped me to see that Edgar would always be alive in his corner of my heart.”
His corner of my heart. His corner. Travis’s corner of her heart. It would always be his. Always.
“I have to go!” Pam shot up, gave Abigail a quick peck on the cheek, and flew out the door. She had to talk to Jeff, before he did something stupid.
Jeff sat at the farthest table in the back corner of the Last Chance Café. After spending the better part of the night tossing and turning and beating up on his pillow, he’d given up on the idea of getting any rest and decided a gallon of coffee at a neutral location was required. He wasn’t sure why he'd grabbed his Bible on his way out the door, but he had.
Instead of working through his next plan of action, he found himself sipping coffee and reading through the first book of Romans. If any of the folks coming and going had thought to stop and say something to him, spotting him nose deep in the Good Book had given them reason to walk by without so much as a nod. Halfway through lunchtime and the book of Ephesians, the place was humming with activity. He dared glance up just in time to see Alice Healey pulling out a chair at the table beside him. Their eyes met for only a fraction of a second, but it was long enough for her to drop her purse on the seat and turn, walking in his direction. He should never have looked up.
Steeling himself for what would no doubt be the first onslaught of public reprimands he would have to endure until the scandal passed by, Jeff closed his Bible and forced a pleased-to-see-you smile. His chair scraped against the floor as he stood. “Mrs. Healey.”
“Don’t you be getting up on my account.” Alice waved him off. “I don’t want to interrupt, but I wouldn’t forgive myself if I didn’t take at least a few moments to let you know how much I hope you change your mind.”
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