One Chance at Love

by Carole Mortimer

  Dizzy sat up shakily, doing her best to straighten her dress. ‘It’s all right, Zach—’

  ‘It is not all right.’ He impatiently pushed her shaking hands aside, to pull up her dress and rezip it, pausing to look into her too-wide eyes, the swollen vulnerability of her lips. He straightened abruptly, drawing in a deep breath. ‘I will not take advantage of a guest under my own roof!’ he rasped.

  Dizzy swayed uncertainly, her hair in disarray about her shoulders. ‘I—’

  ‘I won’t!’ Zach said again firmly, bending down to kiss her hard on the lips before striding out of the room.

  What if the guest wanted to be taken advantage of?

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  DIZZY was still mulling over the problem the next day as Christi berated her for not confiding in her what had happened after she’d gone to bed the evening before.

  She was in love with Zach, admitted it, accepted it and the pain she knew could come along with the acceptance. But Zach was determined not to repeat last night while she was still his guest and, short of moving out to a hotel, she didn’t see how they were going to go on from here. And they had to move on, had to discover exactly how they felt about each other.

  ‘—don’t you think?’

  She blinked, looking up at Christi as she realised her friend had asked her a question. ‘What did you say?’

  Christi looked ready to explode. ‘Will you please get your mind on this conversation?’ she snapped. ‘It’s very rude of you to be lost in thoughts of last night when you refuse to tell me what those thoughts are!’

  She smiled at her friend’s frustration with her preoccupation. ‘Sorry,’ she grimaced ruefully.

  Christi gave a disgusted sigh. ‘I was saying that I think it’s a little unfair of you not to confide in me, when I was the one who made it possible for you to be alone with Uncle Zach last night.’

  Her smile deepened; she was completely at ease with her emotions now, knowing they had been inevitable from the moment she had first gazed at her ‘Greek god’. And she was convinced that Zach was nothing like her parents, that he would never let her down the way they had. Admitting to loving him made her feel vulnerable, but at the same time she had never felt so alive and happy in her life. Figuring out what to do about this love, now that she cherished it, was what filled her thoughts at the moment.

  ‘Don’t think we didn’t appreciate it,’ she teased her friend.

  Christi perked up interestedly. ‘How much?’

  She shrugged. ‘Your uncle and I haven’t spoken at all today, so what do you think?’

  Zach had kept to his usual routine of an early walk, early breakfast, working in his study until lunch time, a quick lunch in there, and then disappearing for the afternoon. It had given her no opportunity to see him, let alone attempt a private conversation with him.

  ‘I think the two of you are just being stubborn,’ Christi said disgustedly. ‘You’re so right for each other.’

  Her eyes widened. ‘We are?’

  ‘Of course you are,’ Christi nodded impatiently, pacing the room, the two of them having just had coffee in the lounge after a late lunch.

  Perhaps they were, although from what Zach had been led to believe about her it probably wasn’t as apparent to him. He probably thought he was having a nervous breakdown, being attracted to a drifter and a sponger, a woman who shared a man’s bed just because he was ‘lonely and had soulful brown eyes’!

  He would have to be told the truth about that before things went any further, and that could make things awkward for all of them. Even if Zach were still attracted to her, she had no reason to suppose he would want to be involved with a twenty-one-year-old virgin with as many hang-ups as she had. No man welcomed complications like that into his life!

  ‘Maybe,’ she said non-committally. ‘But don’t go making any plans for calling him Zach,’ she warned ruefully. ‘Even supposing your uncle does admit to being attracted to me—supposing he does—’ she repeated firmly at Christi’s sceptical snort ‘—I would say one night in his bed is all he would be interested in with a drifter like me who shares anyone’s bed for the night just for somewhere to stay.’

  ‘We’ll see about that!’ Christi said indignantly. ‘He’ll answer to me if he dares… Oh, God, what a mess I’ve made of things!’ she groaned.

  ‘You weren’t to know this would happen.’ Dizzy shook her head. ‘None of us were.’

  Christi straightened determinedly. ‘Well, I’m going to go and tell him the truth right now, and be damned with the consequences.’

  ‘Let me tell him.’

  Christi halted at the door, her expression uncertain. ‘I should really be the one—’

  ‘Let me,’ Dizzy repeated softly. ‘I—there are some other things to discuss, too,’ she reminded gently. ‘Like my relationship to the artist of Knollsley Hall and the portrait in the library,’ she explained flatly as Christi looked puzzled.

  ‘None of that was your fault,’ Christi defended instantly. ‘We don’t get to choose who our parents are.’

  ‘No,’ she conceded dully. ‘And they usually don’t get to choose us, either.’

  ‘Most parents would be proud to have you as their daughter,’ her friend said indignantly.

  She gave a bitter laugh. ‘My parents aren’t like “most parents”.’

  ‘Oh, I know that,’ Christi said fiercely. ‘Sometimes I could—’

  ‘Don’t waste your energy being angry at them,’ Dizzy advised softly. ‘I wasted too many years doing that. It just makes you bitter and twisted, and in the end achieves nothing.’

  ‘Maybe you’re right,’ Christi accepted with a sigh. ‘But Uncle Zach isn’t going to be concerned because your father is Martin Ellington-James, and your mother is Valerie Sherman,’ she said with certainty.

  Her mouth twisted. ‘But does it make me more acceptable, looking at the way I am and the way I live, to admit that they’re my parents, or is it easier for him to believe I’m just an old school acquaintance whose parents lost their money several years ago?’ She gave a rueful smile.

  ‘We both know that neither of those versions are true,’ Christi defended. ‘Besides, we all have a secret or two it’s difficult to admit to.’

  ‘Including Zach?’ she said disbelievingly.

  ‘Including him,’ Christi nodded. ‘And your secrets aren’t so deep and dark that they should matter. Good gracious, you can’t really believe he wants to go on thinking you’re a sponging drifter!’

  She shrugged. ‘The daughter of Martin Ellington-James, MP, isn’t going to be quite so easy to dismiss as penniless Dizzy James.’

  ‘Uncle Zach isn’t like that,’ her friend said with certainty. ‘And he does care for you, I’m sure of it.’

  She was sure he felt something for her, too, otherwise he wouldn’t have drawn back last night, no matter what code of ethics he had been brought up with. But he had loved his fiancée, been devastated when she died, and second best in the life of the man she loved just wouldn’t be enough for her.

  ‘We’ll see.’ She gave Christi a reassuring smile.

  ‘When?’

  She blinked at the abruptness of Christi’s question. ‘When what?’

  ‘When are you going to tell him?’ her friend prompted determinedly.

  ‘Well—I—the next time I see him, I suppose,’ she shrugged.

  ‘Why not now?’ Christi pressured. ‘He can’t have gone far.’

  If only Christi knew! Zach hadn’t gone very far at all. But offering her the temptation of going in search of Zach, when she knew he was off bathing nude in a lake only two miles from here, was something she wasn’t sure she could resist any longer. Maybe finding him at a disadvantage like that wouldn’t make her feel quite so nervous about what she had to tell him.

  ‘Go on,’ Christi urged as she saw her hesitation. ‘He always goes off towards the lakes,’ she supplied eagerly. ‘I suppose there are more birds to watch around there,’ she shrugged.
>
  Poor Christi didn’t know her uncle at all if she still believed that bird-watching tale, although, if she hadn’t seen Zach’s nude bathing for herself that first day, perhaps she would have found it difficult to believe, too!

  ‘OK.’ She firmly made her decision. ‘But if I’m not with him when he comes back send out a search party,’ she attempted to tease.

  Christi hugged her impulsively. ‘Good luck.’

  Dizzy gave a rueful smile. ‘Just don’t expect too much, hmm?’

  ‘Are you kidding?’ her friend grinned. ‘I already have my bridesmaid’s dress of sackcloth and ashes all picked out! Uncle Zach’s sure to make me do some sort of penance for the lies I’ve told him about you,’ she grimaced.

  ‘Half-truths,’ Dizzy comforted.

  ‘Lies,’ Christi insisted. ‘Although maybe he’ll be so relieved to know the truth he’ll forget all about being angry with me,’ she added hopefully.

  Dizzy felt the same way herself. She had been a party to Christi’s deception, even if she hadn’t altogether approved of the idea.

  She didn’t exactly rush to the lake, for she was in no hurry to make her confessions.

  She looked much as she had that first day, her hair confined in the thick braid down her spine, although, as usual, curling wisps insisted on framing her face. The baggy T-shirt was clean, even if it did nothing for her figure, the same with the faded and patched denims. She wasn’t exactly dressed in a way guaranteed to convince Zach she was the daughter of very wealthy parents!

  She could hear the splash of the water even before she came down the last hill that sided the lake, although it took her a few minutes to spot Zach’s sleek head as he swam effortlessly about a hundred yards from the shore.

  When he spotted her, was he going to walk unconcernedly out of the water, unselfconscious of his nakedness, or would he stay in the water that must still be a little chill, despite the warmth of summer?

  She tensed nervously as she realised she was about to find out. Zach’s gaze narrowed on her as he swam lazily back to the shore, where his clothes lay in a neat pile at her feet. After the intimacies they had shared the night before, she was self-conscious about facing him again, all the more so because she knew he was naked beneath the water.

  She was unprepared for his opening comment as he trod water several feet away from her!

  ‘I wondered if you would ever come back here.’ He met her gaze steadily.

  Dizzy gave a start of surprise, swallowing hard. ‘Back?’ she repeated in a voice that sounded slightly higher than normal.

  He shrugged broad shoulders. ‘From the time you must have arrived the other day, and the way you looked at me when we met, I suspected you might have seen me here on your way to the castle.’

  Deep colour brightened her cheeks, and she thrust her hands into her denims pockets. ‘Was it so obvious I was attracted to you?’ she snapped.

  ‘Hardly,’ he drawled lightly. ‘You looked more surprised than anything. But when you began to choke, as soon as Christi mentioned I had been bird-watching all afternoon, I was certain you must have seen what I was really doing.’ He became suddenly still. ‘Did you like what you saw, Dizzy?’ he prompted huskily.

  ‘I—yes,’ she answered in a rush. ‘I—I liked it very much.’ Her cheeks felt as if they were on fire, her wide-eyed gaze fixed on him as she wondered if he intended walking out of the water to dry in the sun today.

  Her eyes widened even more as he began to walk towards her, her breath catching in her throat, only to be released in an unsteady groan as black swimming trunks were revealed as he left the water behind him.

  He shot her an amused glance as he picked up the towel from beneath his clothes, to begin drying his hair. ‘What did you expect, Dizzy?’ he teased softly. ‘I haven’t swum in the nude since I realised you must have seen me that day, and that you could do so again any time you felt like taking a walk down here.’ He took pity on her, and explained, ‘I’ve been waiting for some comment from Christi about my afternoon activities,’ he added with a questioning look.

  Dizzy shrugged, still slightly shaken by the expectancy she had felt as Zach waded out of the water towards her. Not that he was any less devastating in this minute pair of bathing trunks, with water glistening on the golden beauty of his body, and his true masculine power revealed.

  ‘I didn’t think it was right to tell Christi,’ she sighed. ‘It would have been almost like breaking a confidence.’ Besides, it would have put her in the awkward position of trying to pretend Zach’s nakedness that day had meant nothing to her!

  He hung the towel around his neck, the impact of his honey-coloured eyes all the more apparent without his glasses, his hair falling untidily across his forehead. ‘I’m glad you didn’t say you didn’t think Christi would be interested,’ he drawled.

  ‘Zach—’

  ‘Dizzy,’ he derided.

  She frowned. He seemed different today somehow, almost as if—as if he were flirting with her! And why shouldn’t he? After last night he must think she was more than willing to fall into his arms any time he asked her to.

  Zach watched her curiously. ‘What’s Christi up to, Dizzy?’ he finally asked. ‘And why have you let her get away with it?’

  She blinked, dragging her gaze away from the flatness of his chest and stomach, and up to meet his golden gaze. She instantly felt as if she were drowning in a sea of sensuous honey.

  ‘Dizzy.’ He took the step that separated them, clasping her arms. ‘I’ve known from the first time I kissed you that your experience with men must have been limited to the platonic rather than the sensual,’ he told her gently.

  She shook her head. ‘How could you know that?’ she defended. ‘I haven’t—’

  ‘I know because of this, Dizzy.’ Even as he spoke huskily, his head was lowering to hers, his thumb on her chin, parting her lips to receive his, gently savouring the taste of her before deepening the kiss.

  Her hands were drawn instinctively to touch him, to feel the silky texture of his skin, to know the strength of the muscles that rippled beneath that skin. He was steel and velvet at the same time, and her fingertips tingled as she touched him, her hands moving up and down the strength of his back, halting uncertainly as she encountered the material of his bathing trunks.

  His lips left hers to travel across her cheek. ‘Yes,’ he encouraged gruffly. ‘Touch me, Dizzy!’ he urged at her self-conscious hesitation.

  He was like satin to touch, a flesh sculpture, perfect in every way. And from the reaction of his body, her inexperienced caresses pleased him immensely.

  Finally he put her away from him, gazing down at her with warm eyes. ‘We have to talk,’ he said apologetically.

  Dizzy’s senses were so fevered that it took her a few moments to realise he didn’t intend making love to her. ‘But we aren’t in your home now,’ she pointed out disappointedly.

  He smiled gently. ‘We’re still on my land. And we have several things to talk out before we do anything else. Shall we make ourselves comfortable first?’ he suggested softly.

  She was very much afraid that making themselves ‘comfortable’ included Zach putting his clothes on, and as Zach began to do just that she bit back her regretful sigh and sat down on the grass to wait for him to join her.

  Dressed in the professor’s clothes, his hair neatly brushed, he made it seem as if the moment of closeness a few minutes earlier had not happened.

  Zach carefully filled and lit his pipe before joining her on the grass, sitting a polite distance away, as if he, too, felt the chasm yawning between them.

  ‘Tell me,’ he leant back against a tree, the smoke from his pipe filling the air, ‘who is Henry?’

  It had been the last question she had expected, and for a few seconds she just stared at him. ‘Henry?’ she finally managed to repeat.

  ‘Yes,’ he nodded. ‘Whoever he was, he certainly wasn’t your lover,’ he added with certainty.

  ‘Did I ever sa
y he was?’ she defended indignantly.

  ‘Stop delaying the inevitable, Dizzy,’ he said wearily, the glasses back as a screen between her and his emotions. ‘Is Henry a boyfriend of Christi’s she doesn’t want me to know about?’

  ‘Certainly not,’ she frowned.

  Zach sighed. ‘Well, my dear niece is definitely hiding something.’

  Dizzy blushed. ‘Then why don’t you ask her these questions?’ She pulled up a blade of grass beside her, ripping it to shreds in her agitation.

  He watched her steadily. ‘Because you’re as involved in this as she is,’ he stated calmly. ‘The two of you are so familiar and at ease with each other that it speaks of a long and loyal friendship, not the old school acquaintances who can barely stand each other, but feel a certain loyalty because of a girlish equivalent of the “old school tie”, that you would have me believe.’

  She had told Christi that wouldn’t work, knew they had given themselves away numerous times over the last few days. And Zach was far from the unobservant man buried in his books that Christi seemed to believe him to be!

  ‘If you weren’t so judgemental, Christi wouldn’t have had to try to convince you of her maturity to handle her own money by showing you just how irresponsible she could be but isn’t!’ Dizzy attacked, breathing hard in her anger. Zach had lulled her into a false sense of security with his kisses and caresses, leaving her defences wide open, she realised now, when it was too late to do anything about them. Christi knew she was going to tell Zach the truth, but she doubted her friend expected it to be in quite this way, she thought in dismay!

  Zach’s eyes narrowed behind the glasses. ‘Is that what the two of you have been doing?’

  She shrugged resentfully. ‘Well, you have to admit that I’m a perfect example of irresponsibility!’

  ‘Not quite,’ he drawled, his gaze considering. ‘Who are you?’