by Logan Chance
“Yeah.” Although I know what I can do. I can make sure Ellis gets the money Henry delivers so they can save the brewery. “I just need to check on a few things.” I rush out of the kitchen before I tell Ellis everything I’m planning.
I know, it’s all sorts of fucked up in a world of madness. Why can’t life just be easy?
Ha. Of course, that can never happen. I finally find someone I could possibly spend the rest of my life with and this happens. Don’t dwell on what ifs, I tell myself.
As soon as I step out of the kitchen I run smack dab into a brick wall. “Oh, Henry,” I say, stepping back and fixing my hair. “I didn’t see you there.”
“Kiki, I was just stopping by to see how our little arrangement was going.” He smirks this devil-like smile, and I so wish I could slap it off his face.
I don’t want to tell him he’s won, but he has.
I’d do anything for Ellis.
TWENTY-FOUR
Ellis
Never stop chasing...
Should I be happy two dogs are getting married? Normally, sure. I love a good dog wedding just like the next guy. But today, my mood is all over the place.
I can’t believe my father, throwing this lavish party for all his socialite friends and their socialite pups. This place looks like a poodle stomping ground. I don’t think I’ve ever seen so many poodles with pink bows in their hair in all my life.
Come on, I know I haven’t.
This isn’t my scene.
Back home in Atlanta, I’m just a normal guy. I don’t entertain. And I definitely don’t dress my dog up, if I had one.
And after meeting Kiki I really want one. There’s a lot I realize my life was missing before. Since meeting her, I’ve realized I’d been leading an empty, meaningless life.
The guests arrive, and I take my seat next to Henry. He’s a bit cockier today if you can believe that. Like he’s in on a little secret that I’m not privy to. Hope it’s about money. “You got those projection figures I emailed over last night, right?” I whisper to him before the ceremony takes place.
He nods. “Perfect. I love it all.”
I swell with pride, knowing all my hard work and well, Kiki’s grand ideas, will all soon be coming to fruition.
Yasmin calls for Sparkles, and the dog trots down the aisle. I may have rolled my eyes when Sparkles sits perfectly at the dais like she does this every day. Who knows, I could see Yasmin doing this daily with her dogs.
The whole crowd ooh’s and ahh’s when they’re pronounced husband and wife by Kiki. Even though I can’t get behind this particular dog wedding, I can definitely get behind Kiki. Get your mind out of the gutter. But, I’d do that too.
She’s got a brain wealthy of ideas, and I’m the lucky son-of-a-bitch she shares them with. I’m the lucky man who gets to be close to all her genius. All her pure awesomeness. Seriously, she’s life-changing.
I’ve been thinking a lot. And I’m ready to uproot my whole life to be with this woman. As I sit here and watch her, long brown hair flowing in the breeze, her blue strappy dress accentuating every sexy curve I know she has, and a smile to light up the whole enchanted evening. This girl is like ice cream on a gloomy day. Mint chocolate chip, to be exact.
I’ve never been in love, but this is damn near the closest I’ve ever been to it. And staring at her right now as she tries to help two dogs back down the aisle, I realize I’ve already fallen so hard for her there’s no escaping it.
She touches my shoulder as she passes down the aisle and it sends a shockwave straight through me. And without a shadow of a doubt, I know I want this whole thing with her. Life. Love. Marriage. Hell, even a happily ever after.
After parties for weddings are sick. Now imagine that times ten. Yes, for a dog wedding. Like this is insanity, and my father’s whole back yard has been turned into a nightclub with flashing strobe lights and a dancefloor.
Urban and Henry involve me in a conversation for most of the night as I keep catching glances of Kiki every time she passes by.
And I swear she takes my breath away each time she smiles. I wonder if that feeling of eagles swarming in my chest will ever go away when I look at her.
Her and her friends are busily keeping food stocked, and drinks full, and I just want to grab her hand and take her back to my hotel more than anything in the world.
But, I play the game.
I socialize with Henry because we need his firm. Laughing at all his pompous jokes. His snide remarks. Man, this guy really is an ass.
How had I never noticed before?
I tell a few people about the dog beer we’ll be launching in just a few short months. The amount of interest is insane, and I’m excited to tell Kiki.
A while later, I find myself standing alone, overlooking the party like a bystander not wanting to get too close.
“Great party, isn’t it?” my father asks, stepping up beside me. He looks out over the water, holding his cigar away from his mouth. “Want one?” He holds out another in his hand, and I take it from his hand.
“Great party.” And only because a great girl orchestrated it.
He hands me the cigar cutter, and I chop off the tip. “Let me light that for you.” He produces a lighter, and I breathe in the sweet taste of oak and chestnut.
We stand quietly together, sucking on our cigars and looking out over the calm waters of the Intracoastal. There’s so many things I need to say to him, but I can’t muster up a single word. It’s been too long. The animosity has grown into something unrecognizable, even to me.
It eats away at me, leaving nothing but sticks and bones, and I try with everything I can to pick up the pieces and work through the madness in my mind.
Is my dad a bad guy? Absolutely. But, maybe parts of me have been shut off to the idea of a healthy reunion for so many years.
Maybe he’s right about hate not being the opposite of love. Maybe I’m fucking growing up, and need to put the bad blood behind me. My mother has. Why can’t I?
“Kiki’s a great girl,” he says, breaking down a barrier to try to extend the tiniest of an olive branch my way.
“Yeah, she’s definitely something else.” I chuckle a little at the thought of Kiki dancing and singing.
“Hold onto a girl like her.”
“Like you held onto Mom?” The daggers can no longer be contained.
“Now what happened between me and your mother was a long time ago. I’ve apologized, and she’s forgiven me, why can’t you?”
“Because you never apologized to me.”
He doesn’t say anything for a while, before breathing out a measly, “I never realized you expected an apology too.”
“I didn’t expect one, Dad,” I turn to face him, “I deserve one.”
He blinks at me.
“Nice party. How much did this one set you back? You know we need money for these projects, right? Maybe if you just did something you could be proud of in your whole fucking life.” I walk away, unable to face him a second longer, the light of the moon leading my way closer to the lapping waves. I snub out the cigar and place it next to my shoes. Maybe the soft sand between my toes will help.
“I was looking for you.” Kiki walks up behind me, kicking off her shoes. “Is everything ok?”
I take in a deep breath of the cool air and let it out smoothly. “Yeah, just my father.” I turn to face her as she dips her toes into the water. “It’s like this party for example, he can fund this but can’t pay back the loan Bearded Goat gave him.”
“I know.”
“Like I don’t know where his head’s at.” I glance over my shoulder at the lights of the party, not stopping anytime soon. “It’s like his priorities are so twisted up.”
“Have you talked to him about it?”
I stuff my hands in my pockets. “Yeah, Urban and I tried. He doesn’t care.”
“Well, you have Henry. So, everything will work out.”
“Yeah, thank god we have Henry.”
Kiki’s
eyes grow serious and I remove a hand from my pocket to swipe back a strand of brown hair floating across her face. I tuck it behind her ear and then continue a path down her cheek. So fucking soft.
“I need to tell you something, Ellis.”
“Are you alright?”
She shakes her head, pushing my hand away from her face. “No, listen. I think you’re a great person,” Oh no. “but I can’t do this. There’s no future for us. And even if there was, I can’t be with you.”
This is out of nowhere. “I thought we were getting along so well.”
“I’m so sorry, Ellis.” And she rushes away from me, back to the party.
And don’t worry, I rush right after her once I’ve grabbed my shoes. I’m not a fucking idiot.
The minute I get back to the party it’s loud, chaotic, too many bright lights and flashing colors, and people everywhere, blocking my view. I push a stranger out of my way, apologizing under my breath as I push another. The noise level has amped up, and Kiki is nowhere to be seen. I scan the crowd, making my way through them best I can as I try to find her.
Everything had been like a dream. Was it all one-sided? I don’t think so, no I know so. It’s real. And Kiki feels it too.
I spot Poppi and head in her direction. “Have you seen Kiki?”
She looks lost and shakes her head. “I think she just left. Is everything ok?”
“No, it isn’t.” And I run away. After the woman I know for sure I’ve fallen for.
TWENTY-FIVE
Kiki
Never trust yourself…
That was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. And the moment Ellis ran after me, I knew I wanted to turn around, to hug him and say I’d never leave him ever again. But I couldn’t. I can’t give in.
I need Henry to follow through with his end of the deal, and I text him right before I start my van, “it’s done.”
I drive away, not really sure where I’m going but I know I can’t go home. I can’t go to the Dog Spaw. I can’t go anywhere Ellis may be able to find me.
I need time away. I need to heal.
I need to bawl my fucking eyes out.
Because I walked away from him once, and I don’t know if I saw him if I could do it again. In fact, I know I can’t.
So, I head to the one place I know I can find some peace. My mother’s house.
I pull into her driveway, and all the lights are off. Ugh. I hope I don’t wake her.
I creep up the cobblestone pathway leading to her front door, and use my key to let myself in. I’m as quiet as a mouse as I sneak into the kitchen to try to find wine, or anything that will help ease the pain of losing Ellis.
Wine goes well with ice cream, doesn’t it?
I open the fridge, and the kitchen light clicks on.
“What are you doing here? I almost called the police,” my mother says, looking a bit frantic as she holds up a frying pan.
“Why would you call the police?” I grab the wine out of the fridge and shut the door.
“I thought you were an intruder.” She glances at the clock. “What are you doing here so late?”
I hold up the bottle, my eyes tearing up. “I need wine.” I move to the counter, trying my best not to completely meltdown. “Want some?”
My mother sets the frying pan down and steps closer. “Sure, why not.”
I laugh a little, the humor keeping the tears from falling faster.
“Here let me.” My mother takes the wine bottle from my hands and opens a drawer. “Sit down at the kitchen table and I’ll bring you some.”
I nod. Most people binge on chocolate. Me, I usually binge on ice cream. Most times I call the girls and we watch movies, but not this time. This time it feels more catastrophic and the only things a girl needs in times like these are her mother and wine. I watch each movement of my mother in her long pink robe, uncorking the bottle, and pouring us both a glass. I’m the product of divorce and don’t get to see my father too often. But, let me say he missed out with having my mother around.
She has a way to calm and soothe without even saying a word. I know in the past she’s been hard on me about getting married, but it’s all part of who she is. A confident, competitive woman.
She sets the wine glass down in front of me, and I pick it up and take a sip, letting the cool buttery flavor fill my tongue of the Chardonnay.
“Thank you.” I’ve nearly chugged half my glass, and my mother hasn’t even touched hers.
“Rough day?”
“The roughest.” I take another big gulp. “Ellis and I broke it off.” I don’t go into the details of Henry and him forcing me to do it, mainly because it’s late and I am not feeling the full effects of my wine yet.
She rubs my back. “Oh no, that’s horrible. He was such a great guy.” I love the past tense. Like Ellis is no longer that great. Like it was his fault we’re no longer together.
The first tear drops, just thinking about how great he is. “It just never would’ve worked. He lives there, I live here.”
My mother stops rubbing my back and picks up her wine glass, taking a small sip. “Well, you’re right this has been a rough night.”
I laugh a little through the tears that are heavily falling now. “I know.”
My mother, bless her heart, doesn’t say anything, just hands me a box of tissues and takes another sip of her wine. We sit in silence for a few minutes, and it’s exactly what I need right now. I finish off my glass of wine, and my mother fills another one for me.
“Kiki, you don’t have to have your whole life figured out ahead of time. Hell,” she laughs, “I’m still figuring mine out along the way.” She wraps her arms around me, curling me into a hug.
“I know. I just so wanted to figure things out with him.”
I stay at my mother’s house and the next morning, I feel like I’ve cried a river. My eyes are puffy, and I look like I was hit by a Mack truck, and feel like it too.
“Morning,” my mother singsongs, cooking something that smells delicious on the stove. “Hope you’re hungry.”
I doubt I could eat, even though it all looks so delicious. I make some sort of inaudible sound, and my mother shushes it away.
“You need food.” She places a plate in front of me, and I smile at the eggs and bacon positioned in a smiley face for me.
“Mom, you do know I’m not five-years-old anymore, right?”
She smiles, leaning over to kiss my cheek. “I can spoil my baby anytime she’s here.”
It’s always good to come home, to remember where you came from. Sure, I know my mother doesn’t live too far away, but I don’t get home as much as I should. And that thought saddens me.
“What are you doing today?” I ask my mother.
She shrugs. “Haven’t really come up with anything. You?”
“I need to go to the Atwood’s to collect all the decorations, and make sure everything turned out ok.” Leaving right in the middle of the party I was throwing was probably not the best idea. But, the party was dying down, and hopefully they don’t hold it against me. “I should get ready.” I take a bite of the eggs, and try my best to gather the courage of facing them.
Not so much the Atwood’s, but Ellis. I hope he’s not there.
Like I said, once the money is handled, and the deal goes through then I know for a fact Ellis will be back on the first flight to Georgia. It’s sad, sure, but it’s for the best.
Now their brewery will have the products I helped come up with. Now every dog in America (ok the Southeast, until they expand) can have a healthy doggy treat. That thought makes me smile.
“Do you want me to go with you?” I love my mom.
“No, it’ll be ok. I’m a big girl.” Even though I don’t feel like it right now.
TWENTY-SIX
Ellis
Never trust the hype…
“What exactly is that?” I ask, rubbing out the crick in my neck from sleeping in my car. Yes, you heard that right. I slept in my car
while waiting outside Kiki’s house, in the mere hope I’d get to see her and try to understand why she said the words she did.
Is she right?
Is this whole thing going nowhere?
My life is in Atlanta, but I know she’s my life now, too.
My brother draws back my attention when he clicks on the email. “It came this morning. From the Wright Brothers and Associates. Says they have no dealings with us.”
I slam my fist on the desk. “What does this mean? Henry played us?”
Urban clicks the mouse, trying to back out of the email to see if there’s anything else explaining what’s going on in his inbox. “I emailed their company a few days ago, just to make sure everything was on the up and up and we were ready to move forward. Ya know, because I was tired of Henry not committing to anything real.”
“Right.” Any time Urban or I asked Henry numbers and figures he always laughed and pushed it aside. Now I see we were taken for...what exactly? “It doesn’t make sense.”
“I know. We haven’t signed any paperwork. We haven’t given him anything. So, I’m not really sure what’s going on.” Urban stands from his chair. “I’m going down there.”
“Well, I’m coming with you.”
We hop in Urban’s black SUV and head downtown to the Wright Brothers Investment Firm. If anyone can put an end to all the back and forth that we can never seem to get answers to, someone there can. Now that I’m thinking about it, Henry’s been calling the shots and making sure no one knows which way is up or down.
“That man sure talks a good talk.” I stare at my brother, wondering if he’s realizing what I am.
“Yeah, like a con man.”
The type of man to make you agree to anything he’s asking you. A part of me wonders if that’s why Kiki said yes to his proposal. I shake that thought away as quickly as it came. Henry is a player, in the worst kinds of way.
Not like how Urban plays around with women, but a different kind of player. A user. A kind that makes you believe every word that comes out of his mouth. Like, yes, he has the money to back every project we’ve ever needed to get done. “Are we stupid for believing this guy?” I ask him.