“You’re new and improved,” she said to her reflection as she applied some gloss to her lips. “This is how it should have always been.”
“New and improved indeed!” Hilly said, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. “Now come along, dear. Let’s not keep the doctor waiting.”
She sucked in a deep breath and allowed Hilly to guide her out of the room for the final time.
With her permission, Doctor Fierro had arranged a meeting with her closest friends. Jeb, Lydia, Benji, Laney, and Callum were going to hear the whole story behind her decision to admit herself to the hospital—it had her scared shitless, to say the least, but they deserved that much.
After all, how could they be close, as families were meant to be, if they didn’t know such a crucial part of her past?
Swallowing her nerves into place, she waited for Hilly to push the large metal door to the conference room open, and then she stepped inside to be greeted by all the faces she loved so much.
Especially Jeb’s.
“Hey, beautiful,” he said, his arms immediately wrapping around her. “Today’s the day, huh? Are you ready to get out of here?”
“I am,” she replied, nodding quickly. Glancing around the long table, she smiled at them all and then bit her lip. “But first, we need to talk.”
“That’s right,” Doctor Fierro, seated at the head of the table, spoke. With her file placed before him and a friendly smile on his face, he beckoned her to take the seat closest to him. “Let’s go ahead and get started. I’m sure you’re all eager to have Aggie home.”
Everyone murmured in agreement as she took her seat, Jeb beside her, and released a calming breath.
“Aggie has made significant improvement since being in my care. I just want you all to know how very proud I am of her. It takes a strong person to admit something is wrong, and an even stronger one to want to do something about it.” The doctor flipped through a few pages of her file and then pushed his glasses up on his nose. “Now, I know you are all curious about her diagnosis, as you’ve made it clear you want to help with her recovery as much as possible.”
“Absolutely,” Lydia stated, holding her husband’s hand tightly. “We’ll do whatever it takes to help her remain happy and healthy. We love Aggie with all our hearts.”
She smiled in her friend’s direction and felt as Jeb took her hand into his. Squeezing his fingers, she turned her head to gaze at him, overwhelmed with the love she found in his eyes.
“And I am glad to hear that, Mrs. Reynolds. I feel friendship and a sturdy support system help most when it comes to these things. Aggie is very lucky to have you. Now,”—he released a small sigh and leaned back in his seat, clasping his hands together against his stomach—“As far as her diagnosis goes, she and I have agreed you need to hear about her past in order to understand it a little better.”
“We’re all ears, doc.” Benji leaned forward in his seat and propped an elbow atop the table, staring at him intently.
Her gaze drifted to him and her insides began to twist into nervous knots again. It was scary to know all of them were about to see the most vulnerable parts of her life.
“I’m right here,” Jeb whispered into her ear, nuzzling his nose against her pulse point. “It’s going to be all right, baby.”
And she believed him. More than anything, she trusted him when he said everything would be all right. He’d been saying it all along, and so far, he’d been right.
He gave her so much strength and courage, and he probably didn’t even realize it.
I’ll have to thank him properly later, she thought with a small smile.
For the next forty minutes or so, Doctor Fierro repeated the story she’d told him. Together they had dissected every inch of the tale in his office, and now, here her friends sat, listening in on what she thought would always remain a secret. But what she quickly learned was the fact that such a secret should never be hidden away in a person’s mind, because it would eventually eat them alive and give them nothing but pain, anger, and misery.
She was relieved to let it go.
Of course, her past was not an easy pill to swallow. When Doctor Fierro revealed how she’d been sexually assaulted by her mother’s new husband, repeatedly, there were two basic reactions from her friends.
Tears and rage.
As a slew of curses flew from Benji’s mouth, Jeb wrapped her up in his arms and kissed her temple.
As Lydia buried her face into her hands and sobbed like a banshee, Jeb whispered into her ear that it was almost over.
And finally, after every single emotional cut had been bared for the world—or her world, rather—to see, Doctor Fierro stood from his seat and began circling the table with one hand behind his back.
“When people are admitted here, the public often sees them as crazy in some way. I do not believe Aggie to be crazy—as I’ve told her myself. She is simply a young girl who became burdened with far too much, far too soon. She was robbed of her innocence and emotionally tortured by a sick, sick man.”
“Sick man, my ass,” Benji growled. “Let me see that motherfucker. I’ll show him ‘sick man’.”
“Calm down, Ben. It’s in the past,” she offered, leaning forward in her seat to see around Jeb’s large frame. “He’s not...I don’t even know if he’s still alive.”
“Well, I can make sure he isn’t,” Benji promised, his jawline tightening. “Stupid son of a bitch.”
“I can see you care very much for your friend, Mr. Palmer,” Doctor Fierro said, stopping directly behind his chair. “But bringing violence into this won’t help anyone. What I’d like to see from you—from all of you,”—he glanced around the table—“Is overwhelming love and support for Aggie. That’s what she needs most.”
“Of course. There shouldn’t be any question about that.” Lydia wiped at her eyes with a tissue and sniffled softly. “I’ll always remind her how loved she is by our family. She’ll get so much support from me, she’ll be sick of it.”
“Never,” she replied, laughing half-heartedly. “I could never get sick of you, Sugar.”
“And as far as her medication goes,” Callum interrupted, tapping his knuckles against the tabletop. “Is that something insurance can cover, Doctor? Or will she have to pay that out of pocket?”
“Callum, no.” Frowning, she shook her head. “I know what idea you’ve got and the answer is no.”
He gave her an innocent look as if to say, ‘what did I do?’, but she knew exactly what he was trying to do. Allowing him to pay for her medication was out of the question.
This was something she’d have to do on her own because she owed herself that much.
Well, actually, she owed herself a lot of things, but being capable of paying for the medicine that would keep her well was a darn good start.
“Actually, her medication is a new one. I have plenty of samples available to help her out until she finds herself in a position to be able to afford them. But,”—he smiled as he approached her chair, stopping behind it—“From my understanding, her new business endeavor promises to be a success, and I wish her all of it.”
“New business endeavor?” Laney smiled excitedly. “What’s this, Aggie?”
And then it was time to tell her friends about the plans she’d been making during her stay at the hospital. It was a big dream—a far stretch, even, but it was something she knew she could be good at and something she’d enjoy very much.
“Well, after the tornados destroyed most of the town, Mrs. Lockaby closed down her beauty parlor indefinitely...and then she moved away with that fellow she met off that dating site, as you all remember, so...I was thinking maybe I might open up a beauty parlor of my own in the near future. I’d still be doing massages if people wanted, but I’d like to extend my talents and maybe offer hair and nails, too. I’m going to go back to school to earn a cosmetology degree.”
Various whoops and cheers sounded around the table and all she could do was smile. She felt so p
roud and the support of her friends meant everything to her. Attending a bonafide school for once in her life and actually accomplishing something was something she’d always wanted.
But not as much as I want Jeb.
As if he could somehow read her mind, he placed a hand on her knee and gave it a gentle squeeze. She turned her head to gaze at him and he winked in her direction.
Gods, I love him.
“We’re almost finished here,” Doctor Fierro said, interrupting her thoughts. “But before you all go, there is one last thing I’d like to discuss with you. I feel it’s important to inform you that Aggie’s felt some sort of betrayal as far as her involvement in the LGBTQ community goes. It is my understanding that at least one of you is transgender.”
“I am,” Lydia and Benji both said without hesitation.
“It’s none of my business, really, but thank you for your honesty.” He smiled at them and returned to his seat. “As I said, she feels like she’s betrayed the community because for a long time, she has identified as gender-fluid, or gender-neutral if you prefer. Agnes was a huge part of who she was, but for all the wrong reasons.”
As the good doctor had once explained, she’d created Agnes in her mind to protect her from all the bad things happening in her life, especially after what had happened with her mother’s new husband. It was just too much for her young mind to handle, and Agnes seemed to be stronger.
But now she knew she’d had the strength all along.
“The world still has a lot of growing to do, especially here in the states,” the doctor continued, toying with his tie in thought. “There are many people out there who still see homosexuality, or any sexuality other than their own, as a sin or mental illness. I assure you that is not the case.” The corner of his lips turned upwards in a smile as he removed his glasses and placed them atop her file. “Being someone who likes to dress as both a male and female is not a sickness. Aggie,”—his eyes landed on her—“You are not crazy. Who you are as an individual is completely, one-hundred percent normal. I hope that by meeting other gender-fluid people, you were able to come to that conclusion.”
“Yes, Doctor Fierro.” She nodded. “It was a pleasure to sit down and speak with them. Thank you for that.”
Turning to her friends, she explained the meeting she’d had only a short week ago. Doctor Fierro had invited five people, all who identified as gender-fluid, to sit down and talk with her. They shared their life experiences with her, told her stories about the adversity they had been through themselves, and gave her as many hugs as she wanted. It had been a touching moment, and one she would never forget.
Her only regret was that she wasn’t really like them at all. They were beautiful, awesome people, and she’d simply been hiding behind a figment of her imagination.
Not anymore, she thought.
“But if she decides to dress as a man, she can, right?” Benji asked, his eyebrows furrowing. “I mean, that’s just who she is. She likes to bounce back and forth.”
“She can if she wants to, yes.” Doctor Fierro gave a small nod. “But what I’m trying to establish here is that what you are, any of you, is not wrong. People have been basing their opinions of the LGBTQ community on religion for years upon years. Did you know that back in the days of Ancient Greece, it was actually quite normal for soldiers to have lovers within the ranks?”
“I did actually know that,” Callum stated rather proudly. “I read a lot.”
“Well, it is true. People today,”—the doctor sighed—“They exhaust me. Labels are such a boring thing when you think about it and terribly misleading. How can you possibly describe everything there is to know about a person with only one word?”
“You can’t,” she said, her big smile returning. “It’s impossible.”
“Precisely my point, Aggie.” Reaching his hand across the table, he waited patiently for her to shake it. When she did, he smiled broadly. “I wish you the very best on this new road you’re heading down, Miss Reed. I look forward to seeing you for our first visit in two weeks.”
“Thank you, Doctor Fierro.” Shaking his hand vigorously, she blinked back happy tears and laughed. “Thank you for giving me my life back. I’ll see you in two weeks.”
After saying goodbye to Doctor Fierro, Hilly, and the rest of the staff at the hospital, she stepped out into the fresh air and sunlight for the first time in, well, way too fucking long. Stopping on the sidewalk, she tilted her head back and lost herself in the simple bliss of the sun’s rays kissing her skin.
“What are you doing, Aggie?” Benji asked as he shuffled up beside her.
“Enjoying the sun.”
“It’s fucking freezing out here, babe. Come on—let’s get you to the truck.”
“Just a minute,” she said when he grabbed her arm. “Just let me enjoy it.”
“Come on, Ben. She’s fine,” Lydia insisted. “We need to go ahead of them anyway, remember?”
“Oh. Oh, right. See you later then, Aggie.”
As her friends walked away, she inhaled the sweet scent of nature with an appreciative smile on her lips. People seriously had no idea how much they’d miss even the simplest of things until they went without it for a long period of time, even just the smell of fresh air.
The soft squeak of brakes finally pulled her out of the almost-hypnotic state she’d been in, and she opened her eyes to see Jeb’s truck. He quickly got out and hurried to the other side to open the door for her.
“Your chariot awaits, my lady,” he said, giving her a small bow.
She rolled her eyes, blushed, and then got in the passenger seat. Once they were on the road, she scooted closer to him and looped an arm through his, resting her head against his shoulder.
Finally, she was home.
The music playing on the stereo was soft and mellow; it threatened to put her to sleep.
There hadn’t been very much to do at the hospital when one wasn’t in therapy or group activities, so taking two or three naps a day was pretty much something everyone did. Hopefully she’d find many things to do to keep her busy and wouldn’t need naps to save her from boredom.
Going back to school will keep me busy, she decided. And there won’t be any more visiting hours to worry about either. I can see my friends whenever I want.
And luckily for her, the person she wanted to see most of all was seated right beside her, currently stroking his thumb over her knuckles.
“We’re almost home,” he said after a few minutes of driving. “Are you sure this is what you want, Aggie? To live with me, I mean?”
She lifted her head and stared at him, lifting a perfectly shaped eyebrow—thanks to Lydia smuggling in some tweezers at their last visiting session. “Are you kidding me? Of course, I am sure. I want nothing more.”
“I’m just double-checking, baby. Please don’t be offended.” He lifted her hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles, grinning. “I want you there, don’t doubt that. I just had to make sure. Again.”
“Well. I’m doubly sure about it. I don’t want to live alone in that apartment. Besides,” she whispered, leaning in until her lips touched his ear. “It means we can have sex anytime we want, which I hope will be numerous times a day.”
She felt him shiver and his grip on the steering wheel tightened. “Damn, baby. That...yeah. Yeah, that’s going to happen. I promise.”
Giggling softly, she rested her head against his shoulder again and watched the beautiful autumn scenery pass by.
When they finally made it to his house, she leaned forward and pressed her palms against the dashboard, frowning. “What is that?”
“What’s what?”
“That.” She pointed towards the large barn sitting a few yards behind his house. “That wasn’t here last time.”
“Oh, that,” he said, as if it wasn’t a big deal. “I decided I needed one.”
“A barn? Whatever for? Do you plan on becoming a farmer?”
“Maybe I do.” With that, he pus
hed open the door and got out, his hand already waiting for hers. “A lot’s changed, Aggie. But all for the better, I swear.”
“Well, I anticipated that, Jeb. But a barn? Why do you need a barn?” It had her completely stumped. She’d never pegged him as the type for the farm life, but maybe she’d been wrong.
Gods, was she in love with a farmer?
“Don’t worry about that just yet. Come and look inside,” he said excitedly, tugging gently at her hand. “I’ve been sprucing up the house.”
“I can’t imagine it needed much.” Laughing, she followed after him. “It was so beautiful already, Jeb. What could possibly need—oh my god.”
Halting abruptly, she stared at the house she’d be calling home for the rest of, hopefully, forever. A banner had been carefully placed along the top of the front porch, and it read:
WELCOME HOME, AGGIE
Her hand immediately flew to her mouth and she released a strange noise, a mixture between a squeal and a sob. She wasn’t sure why, but it hit her like a punch to the gut, except the punch came from a fluffy pillow filled with happiness.
It was hard to explain, actually.
“Do you like it?” He asked, gripping her waist gently. “It was Laney’s idea. She thought you’d like it.”
“I love it,” she replied, turning to face him. “Oh, Jeb. I love it more than you could ever possibly understand.”
“I think I might have an idea.” He smiled again, and this time it reached his eyes, as he cupped her face between his cold hands. “I’ve dreamed of a moment like this my entire life, beautiful; finding someone to love me as much as I’ll love them. I’m so glad you’re here. I’m so glad you’re better. I only hope I can keep you happy.”
“You do that every day, simply by existing,” she admitted, touching his face in return. He’d trimmed his beard since their last visit. It seemed shorter, even. But she wouldn’t hold it against him. He still looked ridiculously handsome. “Take me inside, Jeb. Welcome me home properly.”
With that, she tiptoed to kiss him, and it soon grew from tender and sweet, to hungry and hot. The cold weather surrounding them became insignificant when he scooped her up in his arms and carried her up the steps. Once they were inside, it was all she could do to keep from ripping his flannel shirt off. She desperately needed to feel his skin against hers.
One of These Days (Prairie Town Book 4) Page 24