Pizza My Heart 2

by Glenna Sinclair

  As soon as my hair was cut and styled, a couple of tall, silent women made a move to strip off my clothes.

  “Whoa, wait a second,” I protested. “What the hell is going on?”

  “Personal stylists,” Chaz said. “They want to see what clothes will work for you.”

  “I can undress myself,” I said. “Can’t we do this somewhere other than the kitchen?”

  “What, are you shy now?” he asked, raising his eyebrows. “I’ve seen your everything, June. What else do you have that’s going to surprise me? A tail?”

  I huffed a sigh and began trying on clothes, shivering in the cool air of the kitchen, at the clinical disinterest of the stylists. We finally settled on an outfit that Chaz loathed the least—a pair of skinny jeans, ankle boots, a slouchy tank top and a leather jacket—and it was on to the makeup.

  “You need to do this makeup as close to what they’re doing now every single day,” Chaz said. “You’re prone to dark circles, and in Hollywood, that means you party too much.”

  “I don’t party too much,” I said. “I party hardly at all.”

  “That’s neither here nor there,” he said. “Ask questions. Learn this routine. Or I’m sure we could have a stylist come every day and help you get ready. Plenty of actresses do it. I just thought you’d enjoy your privacy.”

  I tried to keep track of the steps and the brushes and the pots of powder and tubes of liquids as the makeup artist kept a running commentary of what she was doing, but it got hopeless as soon as she broke the airbrush out. There was no way I was going to learn how to airbrush my own face.

  When I was finally primed and powdered and as perfect as they were going to get me, I got to stare at myself in the mirror.

  Only it wasn’t myself.

  It was some imagining of just who Chaz thought I should be—styled to a fault, not a hair out of place.

  “This isn’t me,” I told him, looking at my sleek bob that shined beneath the lights overhead. There wasn’t a square centimeter of my face not covered in makeup. I had eyeshadow all the way up to my brow bones. At least my outfit was a little bit cute, but I was not in love with my face—not one bit.

  “Exactly,” Chaz said easily. “You’ll be great. Though I still think it would be better if you could hold a Texas accent throughout the interview.”

  “That would mean I’d have to hold a Texas accent for the rest of my life, and that’s not happening.”

  “You could lose it in a couple weeks,” he said, returning his attention to his phone. “You’d just tell everyone you took a class for fun to get rid of it.”

  “No way,” I said. “I let you take everything else from me. Let me have this one.”

  “Fine,” Chaz said.

  Devon picked that moment to get home. “Wow!” he exclaimed, coming up behind me. I looked at our shared reflection in the mirror in front of us. For the first time, it looked like we maybe belonged together. That’s how drastically my physical appearance had been altered.

  “What do you think?” I asked uncertainly.

  “It’s a big change,” he said diplomatically.

  “I don’t look like myself.”

  “You’re still beautiful.”

  “I think it’s the hair, mostly,” I said, staring at myself. “It looks like a shiny black helmet. It’s too perfect.”

  “Easy solution.” Devon ruffled my locks.

  “Don’t touch her!” Chaz shrieked at him. “We’ve been at this project all afternoon! You’re going to ruin her!”

  “I’m not going to ruin her,” Devon laughed, continuing to play with my hair, moving it aside so he could kiss the back of my neck. His lips there made me shudder. “She was perfect just the way she was, but this is nice, too. Are you ready to go?”

  Oh, yeah. I’d forgotten that all of this was leading up to getting interrogated about my intentions with America’s boyfriend.

  “As I’ll ever be, I guess,” I said.

  “Well, thanks for your help, Chaz,” Devon said. “I’ll take it from here.”

  “Oh, no you won’t,” he said. “I’m witnessing this debacle firsthand.”

  “You’ve been prepping her all day,” Devon said easily. “If it’s a debacle, that’s your problem, not hers.”

  I couldn’t hide my smug grin as Chaz paled. “You can’t blame whatever she says on me,” he said, clearly panicked. “That’s not the way this is going to work.”

  “Let’s go,” Devon said, and I could’ve sworn he was fighting laughter. It made me feel better that we were both on the same side ahead of this stressful interview. Ganging up on Chaz helped take my mind off of the task at hand.

  The ride to the studio passed by too quickly. Chaz barked questions at me the entire ride, quizzing me harder than he had all day on questions Kelly would ask.

  Finally, though, I was freshly powdered and varnished and miked up, seated across from a woman who, if possible, was wearing even more makeup than I was. Kelly’s hair was mile high and rock solid, curls cascading over her shoulders like blond boulders. She checked her lipstick in her cell-phone camera, baring startlingly white teeth, before smiling at me.

  “You ready for this, darling?” she asked, and I couldn’t help my stomach’s flopping, full of nerves.

  “As ready as I’ll ever be,” I squeaked.

  “You’re going to be marvelous,” she assured me. “Everyone will be tuning in.”

  “That’s kind of what I’m afraid of,” I admitted.

  “Nonsense.” She laughed. “That’s a good thing.”

  A good thing for who? Excellent for her show’s ratings, I surmised. But not great for me, as millions would tune in to analyze every feature of my face. For the first time, I wished there was a way I could be wearing even more makeup, if only to hide myself.

  “You’re live in fifteen, Kelly,” someone from behind the bright lights illuminating us called. She slipped her phone into her jacket pocket and beamed.

  “Wait, this is live?” I asked, my mouth dry. “I thought it would be prerecorded.”

  “Darling, this is a historical moment,” she said. “Relax. Ride the wave. You’re about to be famous.”

  I didn’t have time to puzzle out what that meant.

  “And five, four, three, two…”

  “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen,” Kelly said, turning that full-wattage beam toward the camera. “I’m Kelly Kane and do I have a special edition of the show for you tonight.”

  It was mesmerizing to see her do her spiel. I’d personally never watched any of her programming, but Devon and Chaz hadn’t been lying when they said she was good at what she did. She conveyed poise, professionalism, and mischievousness simultaneously. I found myself more interested in watching her talk than I was in being nervous.

  I looked over her shoulder as someone gesticulated wildly. Beyond the lights, just off set, Chaz and Devon watched. It made me feel better to see them, to know they were here with me, until I could make out what Chaz was trying to convey. Oh—I improved my posture immediately and plastered a smile on my face.

  “Joining me in the studio tonight is June Clark. If you don’t know the name already, hold tight. You’re about to start hearing it more and more.”

  I pursed my lips and frowned before breaking out into an uneasy smile again, prompted by Chaz’s exaggerated gesturing. What in the hell was Kelly talking about? Did this have to do with her saying I was about to be famous? Was this interview going to launch me into stardom? I had my doubts about that.

  “Everyone, this is June,” Kelly said, turning to me, that smile still so bright that I was sure she had some kind of hidden mechanism stretching her mouth apart for her. “You might know her better from this photo.”

  Colors and lights shifted behind us, and I realized there was an enormous screen, currently showing the horrible photo of me taken with Devon at the airport upon our mad dash through the terminal.

  “That’s not the best photo of me,” I said u
neasily, laughing weakly.

  “Well, you do clean up nicely,” Kelly chirped.

  “Thanks,” I said before I considered the fact that it wasn’t that great of a compliment. That meant I looked like shit before this extreme makeover Chaz had orchestrated. He gave a big thumbs-up behind Kelly, and she continued.

  “June Clark is the one you see in this picture, hat pulled down over her face, hanging on for dear life to America’s boyfriend, Devon Ray.” Kelly folded her hands in her lap, leaned forward, and adopted a look of mild concern. “June, what were you trying to hide?”

  “Um, hide?” I squeaked. “I wasn’t trying to hide. To be honest, I didn’t know what was happening until we were in the thick of it.”

  “Surely you knew photographers were going to be there to meet Devon Ray,” Kelly said, winking at the camera conspiratorially.

  “I really didn’t. I don’t really think about those kinds of things. I’m…um…I’m from Dallas. Our most famous resident is Tony Romo. And I’m not dating him.”

  “Well, you better not be!” Kelly exclaimed in pretend outrage. “You’re dating Devon Ray! You can’t have both of them!”

  I swallowed. She was making me look like a fool, but then again, maybe I was one. I didn’t know how to play this game. She hadn’t asked any of the questions Chaz had prepped me with. I was afraid to look over in the wings, afraid to see what kind of faces of despair he and Devon were making.

  Devon had to be mortified that I was up here, being a dummy on live television.

  “You met Hollywood’s hottest actor right now in Dallas, didn’t you?” Kelly asked.

  “That’s correct,” I said.

  “You delivered his pizza,” she said, and burst into wild laughter, as if she’d just uttered the funniest string of syllables known to man.

  “That’s also correct,” I said, puzzled at her mirth.

  “Tell us about that.”

  Now she was an “us?” There was more than one of her? That truly was terrifying.

  “It was just a normal day, delivering pizza,” I said, shrugging.

  “Pizza delivery,” she cooed. “That’s your full-time job?”

  “No,” I said, struggling to not curl up and die of embarrassment. Everything that came out of Kelly’s mouth was either patronizing or condescending.

  “What were you doing with your time, then, June?”

  “I was caring for my grandmother full time,” I said. “Pizza delivery was a part-time job.”

  “Your grandmother was sick.’’

  “Yes.”

  “And she raised you.”

  I paused. Had Kelly done her research, or had Chaz let her know? And how in the hell would Chaz know such a thing? It had to have come from Devon, and that pipeline of information was extremely troubling.

  “June?” Kelly prompted, her voice sickeningly soothing. “Did your grandmother raise you?”

  “That’s correct.”

  Behind her, Chaz flung his arms up in the air. God only knew what that was supposed to mean. I didn’t understand what direction Kelly was attempting to steer me, but I didn’t like it. I didn’t want to play her game.

  “I delivered pizza for extra money,” I said, trying to smile again. “It helped make our lives more comfortable. And it was just by chance, during one of those shifts, that I stumbled upon Devon Ray.”

  “It was love at first sight, wasn’t it?” Kelly gushed.

  It most certainly was not. Devon had made a drunken pass at me, and I’d rebuffed him by snapping a photo of him at his lowest point.

  “I was certainly surprised,” I said, chuckling. “I guess there’s a lesson in that, Kelly. You never know what’s going to be behind the doors you open.”

  “Very inspirational,” she said, nodding wisely. “June, I want to get back to your grandmother. Devon visited her. She was his biggest fan.”

  I swallowed. “That’s correct.” Chaz made an elaborate pantomime that conveyed the idea that he was going to hang himself. What did he want me to do? Burst into tears?

  “Do you think you attached yourself to Devon because after she died, there was no one else to help you?”

  The idea was so ludicrous that I snorted at her. “Really?”

  “Pardon?”

  “Devon and I…we fell in love with each other,” I said. “It wasn’t perfect. It wasn’t like a fairy tale. Not at first. It was awkward and messy and confusing and weird and wonderful. It wasn’t something you could wrap up in a bow, Kelly. We stumbled upon each other at strange and difficult points of our lives. And what we have right now is real. And amazing.”

  I looked past Kelly as she took a moment to shuffle her notecards, noticing that Chaz and Devon were standing perfectly still. I didn’t know if that was good or bad, but I was done playing dumb. If Kelly asked me another stupid question, I was going to eviscerate her—live television interview or not.

  “Why was it that your grandmother was the one who raised you, June?”

  Kelly propped her chin up on her hand as if she were helping me to think up the answer to the question. I had no idea what she thought I should say.

  “I think it’s because family sticks together, Kelly,” I said, adopting her same ponderous tone.

  “Because your parents weren’t fit to raise you,” she said.

  I cocked my head at her, blood roaring in my ears. “What?”

  “I said, because your parents weren’t fit to raise you,” she said loudly, oblivious to my growing anger. I noticed that Chaz had laid an arm on Devon behind Kelly.

  I exhaled until my lungs were completely empty, then drew in a fresh breath of air. “I think that I would prefer to stay on topic here. My family is not up for discussion.”

  “June, darling, the sole purpose of this interview is to let America know just who you are,” Kelly said. “Didn’t you agree to that?”

  “I just wanted to make sure they knew that I look like a normal human being,” I said, jerking my thumb over my shoulder. “Not like that awful photo you showed earlier.”

  “Don’t normal human beings have families? Parents?”

  If she had a point, I was failing to see it—and failing hard. Chaz and Devon were becoming huge distractions behind Kelly, both of them arguing heatedly but silently.

  “What I’m trying to say, June, is wouldn’t you want to meet the people responsible for your creation?” Kelly’s luminous eyelashes fluttered slightly. “It’s really quite moving the lengths they’ve gone through to find you.”

  “I don’t think I understand what’s happening,” I said. “I think we should probably jump to a commercial break. Those are still a thing, right? Wouldn’t a commercial be nice right about now?”

  “June, what would you say if you knew your parents were watching you right now?”

  Chaz and Devon stopped their bickering, frozen behind Kelly, and still I failed to understand where this was going.

  “I wouldn’t say anything,” I said. “My grandmother is the only parent I’ve ever known. I haven’t needed anyone other than her. You said it yourself. She raised me. I don’t know anyone else.”

  “June, turn around.”

  I looked cautiously over my shoulder in case there was a bear or something immediately threatening my life, but was faced with two people on the big screen behind us. Neither of them looked familiar. The man wore a torn jean jacket, and he shifted from foot to foot. He had a shock of dark hair that looked like the only styling it had seen was the wind. The woman was dark-haired, too, with large, melancholy eyes. She stood completely still, clasping her hands, the cardigan over her bony shoulders looking as if it were carefully picked out for this very situation.

  “June, who do you see?”

  “A man and a woman,” I said automatically.

  “Don’t you recognize them?”

  “I’ve never seen them before in my life, to my knowledge.”

  The woman’s face crumpled, and she hid it with her hands. The man lo
oked abashed, putting his arm around her shoulders and pulling her close.

  “I really don’t know them,” I reiterated. “And I don’t understand what’s going on.”

  “Oh, I think you do, June,” Kelly said. “You’re just not ready to admit it to yourself. You’re blind to your own truth, and it breaks my heart.”

  “I am very curious to discover what you think my truth is,” I told her hotly.

  “June, your very own parents are right here in this studio with us tonight,” Kelly said breathlessly. “And if you’re willing to, right here and right now, reconcile with them, forgive them for what was done, and what wasn’t done, we would love to make that happen for you. So you can move forward with your life.”

  I shook my head, unable to take my eyes off the man and woman on the screen. “Can they see me right now?”

  “Yes, they can.”

  “And hear me?”

  “Naturally.”

  “Then you are a cruel person,” I said, whipping back around to face her, trying to keep the tears threatening to fall from my eyes to a furious shimmer. “You have no right to meddle in my life like this, in their lives. None of us gave you permission. This interview is over.”

  “That’s just the thing, June,” Kelly said. “This was never meant to be an interview. This was meant to be an intervention. Your parents want back in your life. They want a second chance to be good parents to you. You just won’t let them in, and that’s perhaps the cruelest part of this.”

  “I’m a grown woman,” I said, incredulous. “Why in the world has it taken until now, this very moment, for them to want in on the action? Because I’m in love with Devon Ray? Is that interesting and attractive to them?”

  “June, I need to remind you that they can hear you,” Kelly said solemnly.

  “This is all a farce,” I said. “All of it. We’re through here.”

  “You’re going to have to sort this out, June, sooner or later,” she said. “We want to be here for you. We want to help you through it.”