by Kara Louise
“Bingley, I…” my master spoke but was stopped as his friend put up his hand.
“Now, I know what you are going to say. I remember all too well what your opinion of her was.” He looked toward the window. “That blasted apple!”
“Bingley, there is something…”
“No, Darcy. I must say this. Upon seeing Miss Elizabeth at Pemberley, I could not dismiss the feelings that I discovered I still had for Miss Bennet. I have every intention of calling on her!” He firmly folded his arms in front of him. “You cannot talk me out of it and I insist that you accompany me to Longbourn at the first opportunity!”
My master smiled. “Of course, Bingley. It would be a pleasure.”
It was not difficult to miss the look of surprise that crossed Bingley’s face upon hearing my master’s words. Rather than question his friend, his thoughts returned to Miss Bennet.
“I only hope she does not think ill of me for quitting Netherfield so abruptly and not returning until now. I know Caroline wrote to her to explain our situation but I cannot help but consider that she might have wondered of my long absence.”
I watched as my master looked down and nervously wrung his hands together. I knew he was contemplating an apology, but apparently it was not the time.
“I am quite certain a visit to Longbourn will answer any fears one might have, Bingley.”
I closed my eyes now with every hope that once we arrived at Netherfield, all would go well for both men.
Chapter 25
With the days drawing to an earlier close each day, the sun was reaching toward the horizon when we finally entered the park at Netherfield. Our arrival was almost a year to the day since we first saw Netherfield last autumn. The concept of calendars is not something that comes easily to dogs, not even one as used to humans as I, so this information became known to me on the good authority of Bingley, who, I discovered, was very keen on remembering dates.
Whereas I formerly would bound enthusiastically out from the carriage with nary a concern and work off all my pent up energy from the full day’s ride, it was all I could do to merely stand up and turn toward the open door once Bingley and my master had stepped out. The distance to the ground looked much greater than I ever remembered it. My body ached from the long, uncomfortable carriage ride and the very last thing I wished to do was jump out.
While pondering how I might best remove myself from the carriage with the least amount of discomfort, I felt large hands gently wrap themselves about me and I looked up to see my master, who placed me down on the ground.
“Here we go, good fellow,” my master said with a reassuring, knowing smile.
It felt good to get out, but it was in a rather slow gait that I took to the nearest tree as Bingley and my master stretched their legs and looked about the park.
“The gardeners have done well in maintaining the grounds in your absence, Bingley.”
“Yes, I am pleased. Shall we step inside and see how well it has been prepared for our return?”
I joined the gentlemen and we stepped inside. I cannot answer for them -- human noses being what they are -- but as I walked indoors, my nose drew in all the scents that evoked vivid memories of our previous stay here. The floral scents reminded me of the first time Miss Elizabeth came to Netherfield, when I found myself quite taken by this lively and amiable young lady. There was a pleasant aroma coming from the kitchen that brought back recollections of the meals we had as I sat at Miss Elizabeth’s feet, bestowing upon her my singular attention whilst all others at the table, including my master, paid her little heed. The smoke from the fire wafting from the hearth turned my thoughts to the evenings we spent in the drawing room where Miss Elizabeth challenged my master’s every thought and unknowingly tore his composure to bits.
I easily apprehended that the two gentlemen, as well, were directing their thoughts upon the former days when both Miss Bennets graced the halls of Netherfield. Bingley had a rather dreamy look affixed to his countenance as he glanced about him. My master’s posture stiffened and he walked immediately over to a window and looked out. I was quite certain the window faced the direction of Longbourn.
Bingley’s housekeeper, who had met us at the door and cheerfully welcomed us back, engaged Bingley in a discussion about the management of the estate. My master pulled himself away from the window and he called to me, announcing that he was anxious to freshen up from the long ride and wished to proceed up to his chambers. I eagerly followed as I greatly desired a nap.
My master must have realized this; for almost immediately upon crossing the threshold did he put my special blanket atop the bed and lift me upon it. I no longer had the agility to jump up on my own and depended upon him to assist me. I turned around several times, pawing at the blanket so that it would fluff up and afford me greater comfort. Once it was exactly as I wished, I lay down. My eyes closed and I welcomed the sleep that quickly came upon me.
*~*~*
Whereas I firmly believed a visit to Longbourn should be of the highest priority, neither of the men seemed inclined to pay a call. Over the course of the next few days, several neighbours called to welcome Bingley back and I fervently hoped that perhaps Mr. Bennet might call again, as he did when we first arrived. When he did not, I truly began to wonder whether a visit to the Bennets would transpire.
Oftentimes in the evening, as the men adjourned to the drawing room, I sat at my master’s feet and looked up unremittingly at him. I wished to convey to him that I had not come all this way for him -- or me, for that matter -- to remain confined at Netherfield. But to my dismay, neither he nor Bingley seemed eager to broach the subject of a visit to Longbourn with the other.
I could only attribute their reticence to the possibility that Bingley feared my master’s disapproval and my master feared the same from Miss Elizabeth, despite her show of civility toward him at Pemberley.
It was not until a full two days later that the decision was made at last and the long-awaited visit to Longbourn was planned for the afternoon. While seated in the breakfast room that morning, Bingley casually mentioned it.
“I was wondering, Darcy,” he began.
My master looked up. “Yes?”
Bingley seemingly needed to gather up courage to continue. “Do you not think it would be neighbourly… to call on… to call on the Bennets at Longbourn?” Bingley kept his eyes directed at the plate of food in front of him and did not look once at my master. “Certainly we do not want to appear uncivil.”
“I quite agree with you, Bingley.”
“Perhaps we could….” Suddenly, apprehending my master’s acquiescence, Bingley looked up. “You agree with me?”
My master brought his napkin up and dabbed his mouth. “Yes. In fact, Bingley, I think we ought to call on the Bennets this very afternoon.”
It goes without saying that Bingley was both pleased and surprised at my master’s willingness to call. Now that it appeared my master had agreed to see Miss Elizabeth again, I wondered when he would exhibit the same strength of spirit and admit to his friend that he had been wrong about Miss Bennet.
I enjoyed watching these two men as they each displayed completely different peculiarities that betrayed their nervous excitement in anticipation of seeing the woman each so deeply admired. Bingley’s manner took the form of walking restlessly about the room, arms flailing as he spoke unceasingly about every topic imaginable. I wondered whether he even took the time to breathe, as his words poured out in a never-ending deluge.
It was quite fortunate, however, that he was so disposed to speak, as my master’s inclination was quite the opposite. He stood and gazed out the window or planted his arm on the mantel of the fireplace and gazed at absolutely nothing outside or across the room. He nodded every once in a while to one of Bingley’s effusions, but I truly believe he heard not a word.
My master remained perfectly still except for the nervous tapping of his fingers. On occasion I thought I heard his breath catch, letting it finally
escape ever so slowly, as if a fleeting thought had caused him some uncertainty.
I must admit, much to my chagrin, that my master did not seem to exhibit what I would consider a confident deportment in this thing humans call love. In most every aspect of his life, I had known him to meet every challenge with assurance, but now I saw him questioning his own worth! I wished that he would receive some sort of encouragement on this visit that would allay any and all of his fears that persisted concerning whether Miss Elizabeth returned his favour or not.
Mindful that the rituals of human courtship were beyond my comprehension, I was quite of the opinion that if he only confessed his undying love to her, how could she not return it? Whilst he had done it once before, he had done it all wrong! I knew he had learned much about himself since those days at Hunsford and I hoped that Miss Elizabeth would take notice that he had tried to attend to her reproofs. I could only hope as well, that once my master saw her again, he would display a more outward show of regard towards her.
Unfortunately, I was unable to accompany them as Bingley wished to ride. I suspect it was so that he could pound the horse to Longbourn in rhythm to the pounding of his own heart.
*~*~*
I anxiously awaited the return of my master and Bingley from Longbourn. Despite the slight pain and overall weariness due to my infirm condition, I found it exceedingly difficult to rest and so I paced the floors of Netherfield. However, I knew not whether I anticipated or dreaded their return more. If they returned too soon, that would be an indication that they were not well received, and I did so want them to triumph.
When the men did finally return, I greeted them at the door. Bingley was more exuberant than I had ever seen him, which I perceived as a very heartening sign. However, my master’s mien was as reserved as he was before they departed. I did not know what to make of it. Bingley talked of the joy of seeing the Bennet ladies again, how friendly and engaging they all were, and how angelic Miss Bennet in particular remained. But it soon became clear that my master’s manner had not improved upon seeing Miss Elizabeth again. How could this be? Could Georgiana’s words have had so little effect on him?
Bingley crossed his arms across his chest. “I only wish, Darcy, that you would make an attempt to be more forthcoming in conversation. If you would enter into some sort of dialogue, it would not appear so much that I dragged you along with me against your will!”
“Against my will?”
“Well, what are they to think? You hardly uttered a word there today. You stood there absolutely grave and silent!”
My master guiltily glanced down at me as I lowered my head onto my paws and let out a rather loud and long groan. I knew my master could be quite the conversationalist. He was knowledgeable of all manner of subjects and could discuss anything from literature to history to managing an estate. Indeed, I had been witness to many a lively debate between my master and his friends, sometimes going into the wee hours of the night. It seemed, however, that the basic civilities escaped him when was confronted with the presence of an engaging lady.
I would have been completely disheartened had not my master informed me that night in his chambers that they had received an invitation to return to dine at Longbourn in a few days. He also explained his behaviour to me.
“You cannot think ill of me, Reggie, for my behaviour today! I… I did not feel welcome at Longbourn, particularly by Mrs. Bennet. Her veiled incivility coupled with Miss Elizabeth’s refusal to even look at me left me with lingering doubts. Nevertheless, I knew I was lost as ever in her mere presence and will do all I can to hold on to any hope of encouragement from Miss Elizabeth as to a change in her regard for me.”
My master looked down at me solemnly. “I promise, Reggie, that I will attend to her at dinner in two days’ time and attempt to determine whether now she might be receptive to my suit.”
I reasoned that this would certainly give my master more of an opportunity to engage Miss Elizabeth in conversation; particularly during the meal. He would have ample time throughout this more prolonged visit to establish whether or not the elder Miss Bennets had genuine feelings for either gentleman.
Again, I waited expectantly for their return that night; hopeful that I would find that there had been abundant conversation and occasion to display singular attention. And apparently there was -- for Bingley!
When they returned that evening, Bingley entered the room as if he was the Prince Regent himself. His smile was permanently etched across his face and he could not praise Miss Bennet enough nor doubt her affections.
“Did you see her smile at me when I walked into the dining room? That was all the invitation I needed to sit beside her.”
“Yes, Bingley, and I did not disregard your expression of alarm directed my way when you took that seat.”
“I was quite afraid of you, Darcy. If you were not staring at Miss Elizabeth all evening, your stares were directed at Miss Bennet. How was I to know whether you would take me aside, declaring that Miss Bennet was unfit even to be my dining companion?”
“Surely, you do not believe I would do such a thing!”
“I would hope not, but I never before saw you so adamant about something, Darcy, than declaring Miss Bennet’s unsuitability and her absence of feelings for me last year in London!”
The two men eyed each other and my master straightened and nervously pulled at his coat. With measured words he said, “I must beg your forgiveness, Bingley. It was very wrong of me to make such a declaration. I should never have interfered. It was absurd and impertinent.”
A very surprised smile appeared and Bingley retorted, “I am quite astounded by your admission, Darcy, but quite pleased. I cannot help but wonder what has brought about this change of heart.”
My master looked down. “On our recent calls at Longbourn, I easily perceived that my previous assessment of Miss Bennet’s affections was quite misplaced. It is clear that she esteems you highly and I have no doubts of your happiness together.”
“That is quite remarkable coming from you, Darce. In all our years of friendship, I cannot recall one time when you have been wrong!”
“You are mistaken, Bingley. I have made countless grave errors -- many of them quite recently.”
A sly smile crept across Bingley’s face. “I cannot help but wonder if there is something more.”
A firm thumping of my tail acknowledged the truth of this, but my master did nothing to confirm his friend’s suspicions.
“I… I only wish to set things right, Bingley. I have been confronted lately with the results of my interference. I can only tell you that I have been much distressed by my actions.”
“Good! I am glad to hear it! It serves you right for causing me such unnecessary torment!”
“I am truly regretful, Bingley.”
“I am pleased you no longer disapprove. So I have your blessing to ask for her hand?”
“Of course, good friend.”
“Good!” He turned a stern gaze upon my master. “But I would have you know, I had every intention to make her an offer whether or not you gave your blessing!”
“I am most happy for you, Bingley.” My master chuckled softly.
This confession to his friend had been difficult for my master but he bore it admirably. However, I knew he was not done with his apology. He grew even more grave as he took a deep breath and he shook his head slowly. “Bingley, there is one more bit of information I need to relate to you which does not reflect well upon me either.”
“What is it?” Bingley asked nervously.
“I fear that although I abhor deception, I did withhold information from you in concert with your sisters.”
“About what?”
After a rather long pause, my master finally answered. “When we were last in London, Miss Bennet was also there, staying with her aunt and uncle in Cheapside. She even paid a call to your sisters and we agreed… we agreed that information should be kept from you.”
“What? Miss B
ennet was in Town and you did not tell me? Lord, she must think me unfeeling! How could you?”
“For the reasons we had previously addressed. Although I thought myself to be acting in your best interests, the scheme was wrong in its entirety, Bingley, and I accept full responsibility for my part of it.”
Bingley looked away. He seemed to know not what to say. I wondered whether he refrained from speaking so that he would not say something harsh to his friend. They both were silent for quite some time, both feeling all the awkwardness of the situation.
Finally my master spoke. “It is very apparent, Bingley, that Miss Bennet holds a spirit of such a generous nature that she will not hold this offence against you. You may tell her that in all truth you were completely unaware of her calling upon your sisters. I am quite certain she will forgive you. I can only hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me, as well.”
Bingley breathed in deeply. “She is an angel, is she not?”
Bingley suddenly laughed and I was grateful that the tension bearing down upon my senses had broken and given way to levity.
“Although this incident is far more serious than the other, I cannot help but forgive you. I cannot tell you how much pleasure I have derived to have seen such an expression of distress upon your countenance twice in one day.” Bingley’s eyes danced merrily.
“Twice?” my master asked.
“Yes. Just now, of course, and earlier at dinner when you were seated next to Mrs. Bennet! I found it more and more difficult to stifle a laugh each time I looked over at you. You were either silently staring at your plate of food or if you were in conversation with her, you looked as though you were suffering from an excruciating toothache!”
The men continued their discourse; Bingley teasing and gloating at my master’s expense, a situation I had never before had the occasion of experiencing. But I must say my master tolerated it reasonably well. Perhaps he viewed it as atonement for his interference.