Marina Tsvetaeva- the Essential Poetry

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Marina Tsvetaeva- the Essential Poetry Page 8

by Marina Tsvetaeva


  * * *

  Back? With vulgar nakedness

  Teasing and blinding to the point of tears —

  It spilled over with nothing but this golden

  Laughing lustful lovemaking.70

  * * *

  — Isn’t it true? — A clinging,

  Crumpling stare. In each eyelash there is — an itch.

  — And most importantly — this thickness!”

  A gesture, twisting me into a wisp.

  * * *

  O, a gesture already showing ripping garments

  Off! It’s easier than drinking and eating —

  A grin! (There’s hope for you,

  Alas, for salvation!)

  * * *

  Both sisterly and brotherly?

  In alliance: a union!

  — Not laying to rest — to laugh!

  (And having laid to rest — I laugh.)

  * * *

  7

  Then — the embankment. Last one.

  That’s it. Separately and without hands,

  Like neighbors shunning one another

  We plod along. From the river —

  * * *

  Crying. Without cares I lick off

  The salty plunging quicksilver:

  The heavens did not dispatch

  Solomon’s enormous moon to the tears.71

  * * *

  A pillar. Why not bang your head against it

  Till it bleeds? Into smithereens, not till it bleeds!

  Like fretting criminal accomplices

  We ramble along. (What is killed is — love.)

  * * *

  Stop it! Is this really two lovers?

  Into the night? Separately? To sleep with others?

  “Do you understand that the future

  Is in this?” I fall all the way back.

  * * *

  “To sleep!” Like newlyweds walking over their bedside rug...

  “To sleep!” We can’t walk in step,

  To the same beat. Plaintively: “Take me by the hand!

  We’re not convicts to act this way!..

  * * *

  An electric shock. (He lay on my arm as though

  With his soul! — His hand on my hand.) The current

  Pulses, in feverish wires

  It tears — he lay on my soul with his hand!

  * * *

  He clings. Everything is iridescent! What is more

  Iridescent than tears? Rain, like a bead curtain,

  Closer spaced than the beads. “I don’t know these kinds of embankments

  That come to an end. — The bridge, and:

  “Well?

  Here?” (The hearse has arrived).

  The flight upward of peace — ful

  Eyes. “Can I walk you home?”

  For the fin — al time!

  * * *

  8

  The fin — al bridge.

  (I won’t give back his hand, I won’t pull mine away!)

  The final bridge,

  The final bridge of blame.

  * * *

  Wa — ter72 and firmament.

  I take out the coins.

  A co — in73 for death,

  Charon’s toll for crossing the Lethe.

  * * *

  The shadow of a co — in

  In a shadowy hand. Those co — ins have

  No sound.

  Thus the shadow of a co — in

  * * *

  Into a shadowy hand.

  Without reflection or jingling.

  The co — ins are for them.

  For the dead poppies will be enough.

  * * *

  A bridge.

  The bles — sed part

  Of lovers without hope:

  Bridge, you are like passion:

  A convention: a complete in-between.

  * * *

  I’m nesting: warm,

  Is the rib — that’s why I cling to it so hard.

  Neither before nor afterward:

  An interlude of insight!

  No arms or legs.

  With all my bones and my entire thrust:

  Only my side is alive,

  Which I press against the one next to me.

  * * *

  All life is in this side!

  It is an ear as well as — an echo.

  I cling like a yolk to the egg white,

  like a Samoyed to fur

  * * *

  I crowd to it, I stick to it,

  I pave the way to it. Siamese twins,

  What is your union compared to ours?

  Do you remember — that woman: you called her

  * * *

  Mother? And having forgotten all and

  Everything, in an immobile exultation

  Carrying y — ou,

  She didn’t hold you any closer.

  * * *

  Understand it! We’ve lived like one together!

  We’ve come true! You lullabied me on your chest!

  I won’t — jump down!

  To dive — I’d have to let go of your hand

  * * *

  In – stead. I press tighter and tighter...

  And I’m inseparable.

  Bridge, you’re not my husband:

  A lover — a complete miss!

  * * *

  Bridge, you are on our side!

  We feed the river with our bodies!

  I’ve bitten into your life like ivy,

  Like a tick: rip me out by the roots!

  * * *

  Like ivy! like a tick! —

  Godlessly! Inhumanly!

  Du – mp me, — like a thing,

  Me who didn’t respect

  * * *

  A single thing in this

  Hollow, material world!

  Tell me it’s a dream!

  That it’s night, and after night — it’s morning,

  * * *

  The Ex — press train and we’re in Rome!

  In Granada? I don’t know myself,

  Having tossed away the Mt. Blancs

  And Himalyas of feather beds.

  * * *

  The cha — sm is too vast:

  I warm you up with my last blood.

  Lis — ten to my side!

  This is surely truer

  * * *

  Than ver—ses... Aren’t you

  Warmed up? To whom will you sell yourself in the morning?

  Te — ll me this is a delirium!

  That there’s not and never will be an end

  * * *

  To the bri — dge...

  — The end.

  — Here? —A divine, childlike

  Gesture. —Well? — I’ve sunk my teeth in.

  — Ju —st a little more:

  For the last time!”

  * * *

  9

  With the factory buildings, booming

  And responsive to the call...

  The innermost secret from under the tongue of

  Wives from husbands, and of widows

  * * *

  From friends — to you, the innermost

  Secret of Eve from the tree — here it is:

  I’m no more than an animal

  Wounded in the gut by someone.

  * * *

  It burns... As though my soul’s been torn out

  With the skin! The notorious

  * * *

  Nonsensical heresy called the soul

  Left through a hole like steam.

  * * *

  Pale Christian feebleness!

  Steam! Plaster it with poultices!

  It never was after all!

  There was just a body, the body wanted to live,

  It doesn’t want to live anymore.

  * * *

  Forgive me! I didn’t want to!

  The wail of ripped open bowels!

  This way the condemned wait for the firing squad

  At three in the morning

 
* * *

  Playing chess... With a smile

  Teasing the corridor’s peephole.

  We’re just chess pawns!

  And somebody plays us.

  * * *

  Who? Benevolent gods? Thieves?

  As big as a peephole’s eyelet —

  An eye. The clank of

  The red corridor. A bar’s lifted up.

  * * *

  A puff on a shag of tobacco.

  A spitting, so we’ve lived it up, spitting.

  ...Along these checkerboard pavements is

  A straight road: into a ditch

  * * *

  And into blood. A secret eye:

  The moon’s listening peephole...

  .....................................................

  And looking sideways:

  “How far away you are already!”

  * * *

  10

  A shared shudder

  In unison. “Our dairy bar café!”

  * * *

  Our island, our temple,

  Where in the morning we were —

  * * *

  Part of the riff-raff! A short-lived pair! —

  We celebrated our matins.

  * * *

  With the bazaar and vile stench

  Permeated through with a dream and with spring...

  Here the coffee was foul —

  As though it were made entirely of oats!

  * * *

  (To extinguish capriciousness

  With oats in racehorses!)

  That coffee hardly smelled

  Of Arabia,

  * * *

  But of Arcadia...

  * * *

  How the waitress smiled at us,

  Seating us next to each other,

  With a worldly and compassionate —

  Guarded smile of

  * * *

  Gray-haired mistresses:

  You will wither away! Live!

  She smiled at our madness, at pennilessness,

  At a yawn and at love, —

  * * *

  But mainly — at our youth!

  At a chuckle — without reason,

  At a grin — without intent,

  At a face — without wrinkles —

  * * *

  O, mainly — at our youth!

  At passions wrong for this climate!

  Youth that has wafted — from somewhere,

  That has poured in — from somewhere

  * * *

  Into the dim cafe:

  — A burnouse and Tunis! —

  Smiled at hopes and muscles

  Beneath the decrepitude of raiments...

  * * *

  (Dear friend, I’m not complaining:

  A scar on top of a scar!)

  O, how the hostess

  Saw us off in a starched

  * * *

  Dutch bonnet...

  Not quite recalling, not quite understanding,

  As though we were taken away from a celebration...

  — Our street! — Now it’s not ours anymore... —

  —So many times along it... — No longer we... —

  * * *

  — Tomorrow the sun will rise in the west!

  — David will break up with Jehovah!

  * * *

  — What are we doing? — Par — ting.

  — That most stupid of words

  * * *

  Means nothing to me:

  We are par — ting. — One out of a hundred?74

  Just a word with two syllables

  Behind which there is a void.

  Stop! Is it Serbian or Croatian,

  I guess, is it the Czech country going crazy in us?

  Par — ting. To part...

  What super-most-natural of nonsense!

  * * *

  The sound from which ears explode,

  They stretch beyond the limit of longing...

  Par — ting — it’s not in the Russian tongue!

  Not in the woman’s! Not in the man’s!

  * * *

  Not in God’s! What are we — sheep,

  Yawning at suppertime?

  Par — ting — in what language?

  There’s no such meaning,

  * * *

  Not even a sound! It’s simply the dull

  Noise — of a saw, for example, through a dream.

  Par — ting — is just a nightingale’s moan,

  That of the swan of Khlebnikov’s

  * * *

  School... 75

  But how did it turn out this way?

  Like a dried up reservoir —

  The air! You can hear a hand touching a hand.

  To part — this is surely thunder

  * * *

  Out of the blue... This is the ocean dashing into a cabin.

  The outermost cape of Oceania!

  These streets are too steep:

  To part — this surely is going down

  * * *

  A mountain... This is the sigh of soles

  Weighing a ton...76 A palm, finally, and a nail!

  A reason that knocks you down:

  To part — this is really separately, isn’t it,

  * * *

  But we’ve grown into one…

  * * *

  11

  To lose everything right away —

  It couldn’t be tidier.

  Countryside, suburb:

  An end to the days.

  * * *

  To bliss (read — to stones),

  To the days, to the houses, to us.

  * * *

  Empty dachas! I revere them

  The same way — as I did my old mother.

  * * *

  This surely is action — to stand empty:

  What is hollow doesn’t stay empty.

  * * *

  (Dachas, a third of you empty,

  Better for you to burn down!)

  * * *

  Just don’t shudder

  Having opened the wound.

  Countryside, countryside,

  A tearing of sutures!

  * * *

  For without superfluous words,

  Ornate ones — love is a suture.

  * * *

  A suture, and not a bandage, a suture — not a shield.

  “O, don’t beg for shelter!”

  A suture by which the dead are stitched to the earth,

  By which I’m stitched to you.

  * * *

  (Time will still show with which stitch:

  A light one or three—ply!)

  * * *

  One way or another, my friend — arms at attention!

  Into smithereens and slivers!

  Only that of glory that has burst:

  It’s burst but didn’t come apart at the seams!

  Under the tacking thread — is a living red

  Vein and not decay.

  * * *

  O, the one who breaks off

  Doesn’t lose!

  The countryside, the suburb:

  A divorce for brows.

  They’re executing nowadays in the

  Villages — a draft of wind for brains!

  * * *

  O, one who walks away doesn’t lose

  At the hour when the dawn breaks.

  I stitched a whole life for you

  During the night, from scratch.

  * * *

  So don’t reproach me for it being crooked:

  The suburb is: — a rip for sutures.

  * * *

  Untidied up souls —

  Are covered with scars!..

  * * *

  The countryside, the suburb:

  The furious span

  * * *

  Of the suburb. With the boot of fate,

  Do you hear it — along the moist clay?

  ...Blame it on my quick hand,

  Friend, and the tenacious living

  * * *

 
Thread — whichever way you damn it!

  The fin — al lamp—post!

  Here? A look is — just like —

  A conspiracy. The look —

  Of the lower races. “Can we go up the mountain?

  For the fin — al time!”

  * * *

  12

  Like a thick mane

  Rain in our eyes. — Hills.

  We passed the suburbs.

  We’re in the countryside.

  * * *

  There is — and isn’t for us!

  A stepmother — not a mother!

  Nowhere to go further.

  Here we’ll pack it in.

  * * *

  A field. A fence.

  We stand like brother and sister.

 

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