“I’m the most careful man ever born,” he answered.
She looked ahead again. “Is that all you ever did before this, Buck, work on ranches and herd cattle?”
“All I ever knew. Then when the railroads came in, there were fewer jobs for trail men. And I was a little tired of it anyway. I’d been working up in South Dakota. I even considered settling down. But a few things happened that changed all that, so I started wandering, ended up at Cripple Creek doing this.”
“You said once you made a point of following Wade Tillis around. He must have had something to do with you not settling in South Dakota. I know from the way you talked that day you stood up against him that he had something to do with Mary Beth. Were you going to settle down with her?”
When there was no reply she halted Pepper and turned the animal to face him. He was just staring at her, quietly smoking.
“You don’t play fair, Shortcake,” he told her. “I asked you not to bring up that subject.”
“But you know almost everything about me. You made me tell you about Jimmie.”
“That’s different.”
“Why? Aren’t we good friends now?”
He threw his cigarette stub down, dismounting to smash it with his foot, then remounting. “All right. Wade Tillis owned the ranch I worked on in South Dakota. Mary Beth was his niece. Now, are you satisfied?”
“That’s it? What happened to make you hate him?”
He pushed back his hat and sighed. “For one thing, Wade inherited the ranch from his brother. His brother was a good man, worked hard all his life. Wade was always no good. He used people, took anything he could get the easy way. He came to the ranch acting high and mighty. His sister-in-law was already dead, so he became Mary Beth’s guardian. He was suddenly a rich landowner, and everyone else was beneath him, including all the ranch hands, like myself. By the time he came to take over the ranch, I was already in love with Mary Beth Tillis, and she loved me. I’d saved like crazy, had enough money set aside to start a place of my own. We were going to get married. Then along came Wade Tillis. When he found out about our plans, he quickly put me in charge of a cattle drive, never revealing what he really had in mind.”
Buck dismounted again, walked to a rock shelf, and looked out over the valley below. “As soon as I was gone he carted Mary Beth to the nearest train station and put her on a train East, sent her to a finishing school. I wasn’t there, but I know she didn’t want to go. It must have been torture for her to be sent away like that, without being able to explain or say good-bye. When I got back she was gone, and for a long time I couldn’t even find out what school she was attending. Tillis told me I wasn’t good enough for her. The only reason I put up with his insults and stayed on was because I knew Mary Beth would come back sooner or later. Why Tillis didn’t fire me, I’ll never know, except that I think he enjoyed seeing the pain in my eyes, enjoyed lording it over me.”
He began to roll another cigarette, and Harmony dismounted, walking up to stand beside him. “Gosh, I’m sorry, Buck. I guess maybe I shouldn’t have asked.”
He looked down at her, the pain still there. Then he shrugged and lit the cigarette. “I managed to correspond with her finally, through a maid who sympathized with us. Then word came that…that Mary Beth had come down with some kind of fever.” He swallowed, smoking quietly for a moment, looking out over the valley. “Then we got the news that she had died.” He swallowed again, cleared his throat. “It was just like Fast Horse—someone I cared about being sent away, to die alone and never come back. I never saw Mary Beth again, never got to…hold her…talk to her…make her my wife. From that moment on I never hated anyone the way I hated Wade Tillis! And he knew it! He made damned sure he stayed out of my way—had me fired. I wanted revenge, but I knew there would be a better time and place to seek it. It’s pretty hard to get revenge against a man with power and money. And Mary Beth was gone, so nothing mattered anymore. I drifted off. I heard that Tillis had found gold on his property, mined it, and then sold the mine and the ranch for a tremendous amount of money. Other strikes followed and he bought more land, set up supply stores, owned a good share of the towns he occupied—and charged exorbitant prices for his goods. That’s how he got so rich. He’s a good businessman, but he never did a hard day’s work in his life. If he hadn’t inherited that first ranch, he never would have made it and probably wouldn’t be worth anything today.” He took a drag on the cigarette. “At any rate, I kept track of him, stalked him, began following him. Wherever he went, I showed up, making him nervous, reminding him of what he did to poor Mary Beth. I know it bothers him some, and I’m glad. I want him to squirm, to worry. I enjoy that. And someday the time will be right—just right. I’ll know when that day comes, and when it does, I’ll have my revenge!”
The words were spoken bitterly, almost in a hiss. His jaws flexed with repressed anger, and his eyes were watery. She felt out of place, unable to console him, guilty over bringing back memories he would rather forget.
“I’m sorry, Buck. I didn’t know it was anything that bad.” She toyed with the reins of her horse. “Sometimes I feel like that about my parents. I was only six when they abandoned me. Sometimes I wish I could do something to hurt them. I wish I could find them just so I could tell them I hate them, but they probably wouldn’t even care. It’s a terrible feeling to know somebody you love is just…gone…and that they’ll never come back.”
He looked down at her, throwing down the cigarette and stamping it out. He suddenly grasped her arms. “That’s why I don’t want to leave you here, Harmony,” he told her, his grip tight and desperate, his blue eyes suddenly pleading. “I’m afraid if I go away, I’ll come back to find you gone. I don’t want you to be gone! I want you for my own, Harmony Jones. I haven’t cared this much about a woman since Mary Beth.”
His grip frightened her, and suddenly his face came closer. His lips covered her own, searching, pressing, his strong arms pulling her close, pressing her against his hard-muscled chest. He crushed her to him, searching her mouth hungrily, pressing that strange hardness against her belly—it had frightened her so when Jimmie O’Toole had done the same thing—telling her what he would do to her. She suddenly realized that if Buck Hanner thought for one moment that she wanted him, he’d do awful things to her too.
Her heart raced with panic. Not this way! Not this soon! Not at all! She began pushing at him, but his grip was powerful. More and more it reminded her of the night Jimmie had held her wrists, pressing himself against her, kissing her against her will. She had wanted Buck Hanner to kiss her. She knew secretly that she had. Yet now it frightened her.
She twisted her face away. “Stop it!” she gasped. “What are you doing!”
“Damn you, Harmony Jones, I love you!” he said in a husky voice. “Do you know the hell it’s been being up here alone with you and never being able to hold you, touch you? Don’t you have even the smallest idea—”
“You let go of me!” she screamed. “Let go! Let go!”
She kicked his leg hard and his grip lightened enough for her to wrench herself loose. She pushed at Pepper, urging the horse a few feet away from him, and yanking her rifle from its boot, she turned it on him.
“Did you think you could get me by making me feel sorry for you first?” she raged. “You go on back to Cripple Creek, Buck Hanner! You’ve already overstayed your welcome. Now I know why you took so long in showing me everything!”
He stood there, staring at her, looking like a lost little boy. He cursed himself inwardly. What had made him do that? It was not at all the way he’d intended to approach her. He was going to be so careful, so gentle, so tender. He was going to very calmly tell her he loved her and wanted to make her his wife—to take care of her, love her, protect her.
“I’m sorry, Shortcake!” he said, total devastation in his voice. “I…I don’t know what came over me. It was just…talking about Mary Beth—”
“You just thought you’d give it one
hell of a try before you left!” she yelled, tears coming to her eyes. “I knew all men were the same—just like Jimmie, pushing and grabbing and hurting! You can leave now, Buck Hanner! I don’t need you anymore!”
Their eyes held. He knew damned well she’d never shoot him…or would she? Sometimes she acted like a crazy child, at others she was a rational woman.
“I mean it, Harmony,” he spoke up. “I’m sorry. I never meant—” He turned and mounted up. “I do love you, Harmony. You think about that. You think about it real good while I’m gone. I’ll ride back now, get my things and get the mules together. You’d better bring Pepper. I’ll be taking her too. There’s still some daylight. I’ll leave today.”
He kicked Indian’s sides, charging past her at a gallop. She turned to watch him go, then put the rifle back with shaking hands. She was not shaking from fear, she realized, but from an awakened desire she’d never known she possessed. She touched her fingers to her lips, still able to taste the kiss, the sweetness of it, the power of it, the message in it. Buck Hanner was all man and could undoubtedly answer her questions about whether or not it was pleasurable to be with a man, but every time she considered finding out, she remembered Jimmie—the ugliness of his touch and the horror of his words. No. Let Buck Hanner be angry and leave. It was best.
She turned and mounted up, sure she could still smell the scent of him even though he was gone—the smell of man, fresh air, leather. She shivered with a feeling she could not even understand, feeling suddenly weak and out of control. Why did the little inner voice tell her it might be exciting to give Buck Hanner his pleasure? Why did she have this terrible curiosity about him, about being with him? Yes, the timing was right. It was good that he leave, right now. It was best.
When she got back to the cabin, he was nearly packed, tightening straps angrily, cursing when something went wrong. He said nothing to her. She realized he had said he loved her. Loved her…How could that be? Nobody loved Harmony Jones. Everyone left her. Surely he’d only told her that to have his way with her.
Her lips puckered. “Go ahead and leave!” she pouted.
“What the hell do you think I’m doing!” he grumbled.
“Good! I have to be on my own sometime. And you obviously have been here too long, Mr. Buck Hanner! You’ve shown me you’re just like all the rest! Don’t talk to me about love! Love hurts! People love you and then they leave you! I want nothing to do with love, and I don’t care to have a man tell me he loves me just so he can do bad things to me!”
He jerked at a strap, then looked up at her. “Well this man doesn’t tell any woman he loves her unless he means it!” he barked. “And I never would have done ‘bad things’ to you against your will, even though I stole a kiss, for which I apologized! If you were more woman than child you’d understand they aren’t bad things at all! They’re good things, Harmony Jones; someday you’ll understand that!” He mounted up, whirling his horse. “And I’m the one who’ll make you understand it!” He picked up the lead rope to the mules. “Now get down off that horse and get your gear off so I can leave!”
She blinked back tears, suddenly wanting to beg him to stay. But that would mean losing the present battle, and she did not like losing. She dismounted, taking off her bedroll and her rifle and canteen.
“I’ll leave the saddle on,” she announced. “It’s rented anyway, and I won’t need it.”
“Fine!” He rode his horse closer and yanked the reins from her hand. “I’ll be back in a couple of months.”
“I’ll be here!” she replied. “I’ll be rich by then, and I’ll be thinking the same way I’m thinking right now!”
Their eyes held, and he suddenly dismounted. When she backed up a little, he came closer to her anyway. “I love you, Harmony,” he said quietly. He bent closer, and she let him kiss her again, she didn’t know why. It was a quick, gentle kiss, soft, sweet, delicious. Then he simply turned and mounted again. “I’m betting you won’t feel the same at all when I come back,” he added.
He turned his horse, taking up the rope attached to the mules and to Pepper’s reins. “You be careful now!” he called out. “Remember everything I told you—everything! I’ll be back, Harmony Jones! You think I won’t be, but I will. You’ll find out you can trust me after all. And by then you’ll know you love me just as much as I love you.”
She watched him ride away, screaming inside for him to come back but making no move and saying nothing. Soon he disappeared amid a thick stand of pines, and the last mule followed.
Tears ran down her cheeks then. “Good-bye, Buck,” she said quietly.
Chapter Ten
When Buck got up from the bed, he stared down at the young prostitute with whom he’d spent the night. It had been a long time since he’d been with a woman, and he was hoping this one would make him forget about Harmony Jones. But if anything, she made him want Harmony more. Surely bedding a woman would be more fulfilling if she were someone like Harmony. He didn’t feel satisfied, not satisfied at all. Actually he felt more frustrated.
He let the girl sleep while he pulled on his underwear and pants. Then he poured water into a washbowl and washed and shaved before he pulled on a clean shirt. The girl slept through it all, and when Buck finished dressing, he laid a two-dollar bill on the pillow beside the girl, wondering why such a young, pretty thing did what she did. Perhaps she had no choice. It might be a matter of survival. For Harmony, survival was working her gold claim. Who could tell which way she would have turned if she hadn’t inherited it? He grinned then. No. Harmony Jones would never turn to this! She was too smart, for one thing. She’d find a way into some kind of business. Selling her body was the last thing she would do. It would be hard enough for any man to get her to give that body freely and willingly. Harmony Jones would die before she sold it.
He shook his head and donned his hat, picking up his gun belt and strapping it on. Then he quietly left the room, to walk downstairs and outside into the bright sunlight. He had work to do for Jack Leads as soon as breakfast was over. And soon he had more trips to take, but none that would bring him close to Harmony’s claim. He would just have to pray for her health and safety, and hope for the best until he could get back to her.
Thinking of her, worrying over her, was torture. He loved and respected her enough to let her do what she thought she must, realizing she had a need to prove something to herself and others—a need to feel free and independent. But his manly instincts nipped at him constantly. He should be with her, providing for her, protecting her, helping her work the claim. Yet, if he went back there and offered his help, she’d accuse him of trying to get a piece of the claim—and a piece of her. The claim he didn’t care about, but she’d be right about herself. He didn’t want just a piece of her; he wanted all of her, from the top of her pretty blonde head to the tips of her tiny toes—and everything in between. He wanted it all for himself, not just as a matter of conquest. He wanted her because he loved her and wanted her with him forever. He never dreamed he would love another girl, not after losing Mary Beth. But now there was Harmony. Harmony Jones. A delightful name. A delightful girl. The next two months or so without her were going to be painful and lonely. He missed her companionship, even missed her quick temper.
He walked into Wanda’s restaurant, and several people looked up at him. Some began to whisper. He knew what they were thinking, knew they were curious. They were wondering if anything had happened when he and Harmony Jones were alone up there on the mountain. He sat down, and Wanda brought him coffee.
“Morning, cowboy,” she said.
“Morning, Wanda. Bring me the usual.”
“Anything for Buck Hanner. When did you get back?”
“Last night.”
She set the pot on the table and looked at him with concern. “That little gal okay?”
Buck shrugged. “She was when I left her. I think she’ll be just fine. She learns quick. When I left she could pan, work a sluice, shoot a rifle, clean and ski
n small animals.” He gave her a smile. “She’ll be all right. Fact is, I wouldn’t want to be the man who might decide to go there and give her a hard time.” He said it loud enough for others to get the message. “Harmony Jones is an independent girl, and she’ll use that rifle right quick if necessary.”
Wanda laughed. “She is an independent one.” She gave him a wink. “And my guess is you wouldn’t mind her being a little more dependent—on you, maybe?”
Buck laughed lightly and rolled a cigarette. “I wouldn’t mind at all. But right now I’m just her guide, Wanda. Nothing more.”
“Well, good luck to you,” she offered, turning to pour coffee for someone else.
“Just a guide, huh?” A man to Buck’s left sneered. “I’ll bet.”
Buck lowered his cigarette, laying it in an ashtray and turning to face one of Wade Tillis’ men, a big, burly brick of a man who usually followed Tillis around like a bodyguard. Tillis himself was nowhere in sight, however. Two other men sat at the table with the big man, who was called Buffalo. The three of them eyed Buck, grins on their faces.
“When are you going to collect on that bet?” Buffalo asked him loudly. “You took the little filly up there and left her. I guess that means you win two hundred dollars. There’s a lot of others who bet on her. They’re all over at the Mother Lode, waiting for you to make the official announcement.”
Buck leaned back, eying all three of them steadily. “I’ll not go over there and make an announcement. I’m sorry it all turned into such a circus. The girl doesn’t deserve that. You can go tell your friends she’s there and she’s fine and she’s making a go of it. Forget my own bet. Just return the money I put down. I don’t want any profit.”
Buffalo laughed. “Maybe you already made your profit, while you were up there alone with the little filly.”
The words were barely finished before Buck was out of his chair and landing into the man, half dragging and half throwing the much heftier Buffalo out the door, knocking over two tables in the process. A couple of women screamed, and Wanda came running in time to see Buck Hanner forcing his huge opponent through the door.
Rapture's Gold Page 17