Home Torn

by Tijan

  Dani took sympathy and murmured, “Look. I’m new. I’m not that good at the friend thing, but I am pretty perceptive and what I see…Lori’s not the type to yearn for children. I don’t see that in her, but I gather that she’s the type to just be happy being married.”

  “No. No. You’re right. I’ve been having this tug-of-war with her and another girl. They both want to settle down and I’ve been completely honest with them both. They know that I’m dating both of them, but the problem is that I want a mother for my children someday.”

  “You’re dating the wrong girls,” Dani spelled it out. “Stop looking at why you’re comfortable around them, dating them, and go for the ones that scare you. There’s probably a reason why those scare you. A good reason.”

  Like she should be giving advice.

  Two men. One she’d loved and he left. And one who’d loved her and she left.

  And speaking of…Dani saw Jake enter the bar, wearing a shoulder holster.

  He crossed the bar and stopped beside Robbie.

  “Hey, Jake,” Robbie greeted and stood.

  “Hi, Robbie.” Jake looked at Dani and said stiffly, “Mae likes the extra hand at closing time.”

  Dani nodded asked, “Want a drink? On the house?”

  “Nah.” He nodded to Mae as she came down the counter. “Heya, Mae.”

  “Jakey.” Aunt Mae nodded, her eyes skimmed over his tired features, Dani’s guarded face, and Robbie’s uncomfortable posture. “Haven’t had this many fine male specimens at my bar at one time since I gained my extra ten pounds.”

  “Aunt Mae.”

  “What? A lot of good-looking folks around here tonight. Just thought I’d share my musings.” She slapped the counter and murmured, “Thanks for coming by, Jakey. I think the night will be all right. Katey’s here and Jonah’s around these parts.”

  “I can wait a bit. Take Dani’s offer and have a coffee, while I’m at it.”

  “It’s your time,” Aunt Mae said, agreeable, as she moved back to close some tabs for the waiting customers.

  Robbie glanced from Jake to Dani, then back again. Dani saw the silent question and nodded her okay. She could handle it, he could return to Lori. She gave him a soft smile just as he turned away.

  “You seem to be getting along pretty well with some folks,” Jake commented as he sat down.

  Dani poured him a cup of coffee and murmured, “I’m sorry for what I said earlier. To Julia.”

  Jake looked up and waited.

  “I just wanted to hurt her like she hurt me and I knew I could do that through you. I’m sorry though. It’s not true and it was a cheap shot.”

  “I know. I told her later about our conversation. She seemed to calm down a little.” He took a sip and opened his mouth, but Dani cut him off.

  “I know what you’re going to say.” She held his gaze. “You’re going to tell me that she’s hurting and you’re who she leans on and depends on. I get that. I know Julia’s hurting. I saw it tonight and I figured it a long time ago, but she’s pushing me out. She’s gotta stop pushing me out of the home. Just cause I left doesn’t mean I left my home.”

  “I know. That’s all I was going to say. I don’t think it’s right, either.”

  Dani fell silent and closed another customer’s tab. As he wrote his signature, Jake leaned back and glanced around the bar. “Is that…is Jonah wiping the tables?”

  Dani hid back a grin and refused comment. Jake could think whatever he wanted. She owed him no explanation.

  Kate approached, but seemed to hesitate as she took him Jake and Dani’s silence. “Can I…,” she eased forward. “Can I interrupt?”

  “Are you interrupting is the better question, Kate?” Jake grinned. “And you’re not interrupting anything except me tasting a finely brewed cup of coffee.”

  Kate rolled her eyes and dropped to the stool on his left. “So. Dani, what did Robbie talk to you about?”

  Jake groaned and mumbled, “Kate, the guy’s not good enough for you. You gotta just move on.”

  She shot him a glare and said pointedly, “I can move my attention onto you and make your life hell if you don’t shut your trap.”

  “Trap’s shut.”

  “He wanted to know what I thought about Lori. That’s all.”

  “What’d you tell him?”

  “I told him…” Dani looked up and saw Robbie frowning down at Lori’s pouting smile. She could see the war wager inside of him, even across a still-crowded bar at closing time. “I told him that Lori doesn’t strike me as yearning for kids, but would be happy married.”

  “You told him that?!” Kate asked, horrified.

  Jake frowned at his partner.

  “Kate,” Dani murmured, “Robbie is a guy that wants kids. Trust me.”

  “How do you know what kind of guy Robbie is?” Jake asked as he turned his studying gaze on her.

  “I know the type. All’s I’m saying.” And Dani turned away.

  Boone had wanted kids. It’s why she’d taken the job at the orphanage in the first place. She wanted him to know she was okay with kids, that she could even teach them. And now…now she wondered why she had cared.

  She tuned back in and heard Jake saying, “…he’s just tall. That’s all he’s got going for him. He’s tall and he’s got a big head—”

  “I don’t dissect Julia, so stop dissecting Robbie,” Kate said hotly.

  “You’re always ranting about Julia,” Jake cried out. “You think it’s easy going from you complaining about Julia all day long to Julia raving about you all evening. A guy could go crazy in those situations.”

  “Julia can focus on me now and Kate can get a much-appreciated breather,” Dani slipped in as she grabbed the glasses Jonah had just brought to the counter. She turned to take them to the sink in the back and found that Jonah had followed.

  “You don’t have to do this,” she started.

  Jonah shrugged and grabbed a rack.

  “Really,” Dani said again.

  “I help out when I’m here. Don’t think I’m doing this because I like you or anything,” he teased.

  “Keep up that behavior and you’ll have my ex hassling you with speeding tickets,” she warned.

  “Right. Like Kate would ever let that happen,” Jonah murmured as he started placing the dishes on the rack, ready for the dryer.

  The guy got her to spill out her worst secret of her life. That made her uneasy. He’d spun her head around, stirred up a whole lot of badness better left packed down and now he was helping her out and teasing. Dani couldn’t figure out if she thought he was okay or if she should send him packing. Thank goodness he’d given up his pitch for her car. That just pissed her off and he seemed to clue into that one.

  Sighing, Dani stated, “I’m okay, you know. I’ll probably join my aunt for a night-capper and crash at her place.”

  Jonah laughed and remarked, “You think this is all about you. It has nothing to do with you. Why do you think I rode with you, hung out at the bar with you, and am here right now?”

  Dani’d already shared her feelings. Any other words would’ve been a waste of breath.

  “Because I’m avoiding my sister. She’s always trying to set me up with a ‘quality’ girl.” He rolled his eyes. “My sister doesn’t like to accept the fact that I’ll settle down when I choose to settle down. She’s worried I’ll end up getting some ‘not of quality’ girl pregnant and I’ll be trapped for the rest of my life.”

  “Cause you’re doing so well to avoid that. Ask me, but your sister has reason to worry about that.”

  Jonah laughed and pushed the rack of dishes through the dryer.

  “Hey.” Kate slapped a hand on the doorframe. “We’re all heading out. Jonah, you need a ride anywhere?”

  “Nah. I’ll be good.”

  “Okay,” her eyes lingered on the two, but she said, “see you later.”

  “Drive safe, Kate,” Jonah called out as he opened the dryer and pulled the dishe
s before sliding a new rack through.

  “Yeah, yeah.” They could hear her distracted response fade as she moved away from the doorway.

  More dishes came piling in and both kept cleaning. The bantering stopped and they had settled into a peaceful quiet between the two.

  Dani was okay with it. She preferred it.

  Jonah seemed lost in his own thoughts.

  An hour later, Mae came to rest at the doorway and mused, “You got two girls who aren’t giving up the scent. They’re bloodhounds. Jonah, this is your dirty work. You do the deed.”

  “Jake could arrest you and haul you off to jail,” Dani suggested.

  “Jakey’s not here. He’s long gone. Everyone’s gone except those two.”

  “What?” Jonah glanced up. “My sister’s gone too?”

  “Yep. Headed out with the rest of that crew.” Mae nodded and moved out into the bar.

  “Kate did say they were ‘all’ heading out,” Dani pointed out.

  Jonah groaned. “I didn’t think…I thought Aid would come and ask me. Hell, my sister probably did this on purpose. She probably thinks that I’ll go home with you...”

  “No.”

  “Come on,” he persuaded. “You live on the river. I’ll just call up and have one of the guys shoot a boat down to pick me up. I’ve got a change of clothes at the station in my locker.”

  “Falls River runs into Loon Lake?”

  “Yeah. The channel is gorgeous. I’ll take you on a boat ride sometime. Better yet, you should just canoe through it.”

  There goes the night-capper with Aunt Mae, but then again, Dani didn’t seem to have the nightmares when someone slept in the same house. It could work for both of them. “Fine.”

  Jonah grinned and nudged her hip with his. “Thanks, Dani. Who knew we’d have such a great friendship?”

  Both ambled into the main room and the two jumped up when they saw Jonah emerge. His grin stopped them in their tracks and he threw an arm around Dani’s shoulder. “I’m only going home with one lady tonight and I’m sorry, dears, but this one gets first dibs.”

  Dani sucked in her breath.

  Aunt Mae burst out laughing.

  One of the girls glared. The other sniffed. But they both turned towards the door. Jonah had spoken and Jonah was a god.

  Dani shook her head, but couldn’t help grinning the entire drive home. She was thankful he didn’t make small talk. Neither seemed the need to fill the silence. It would’ve been unnatural. Dani had gotten used to silence for hours. She saw that Jonah was content too.

  She led the way inside, Jonah held the screen door as she fitted the key in the lock and stepped through. Instead of flicking on all the lights, Dani crossed towards the patio and clicked on a lamp in the corner. It set a nice, relaxing, glow through the room.

  “Drink?”

  “What do you have?”

  “Knowing Aunt Mae—probably everything.”

  “Beer then. Nothing fancy.”

  Dani pulled out two bottles and walked outside to the screened-in patio.

  Jonah glanced around the place as he sat down. “This is nice.”

  “It’s Aunt Mae’s, but if you ask her, she’ll say it’s mine.” Dani uncapped both bottles and slid one over to him. It ended right in front of him.

  “Nice.”

  Dani grinned and took a sip. “I helped out in Mae’s bar for years. Boone never knew that about me.”

  “Guessing he didn’t know your hometown, either.”

  “What makes you say that?”

  “He’s not here,” Jonah stated. “If you were my girl and I proposed to you, nothing would keep me from following you and taking you back. Nothing.”

  It was true. There was so much Boone didn’t know about her. So much that she had chosen not to tell him. It wasn’t a conscious decision, it was just…that was how it was. She just hadn’t told him all those details about herself. And, come to think of it, she hadn’t done a lot of the talking anyway.

  “So, the gang liked you tonight.” Jonah tipped his head back and took a large swallow.

  “I liked them too. Lori was a bit iffy, though.”

  “Lori is a bit iffy.”

  “Robbie asked me if I thought Lori would be a good mother.”

  “What? No!” Jonah exclaimed.

  “Yeah.”

  “What’d you say?”

  “I told him that if he was asking a stranger, he probably knew the answer.”

  “Yeah, Robbie knows the answer, he’s just comfortable with those girls.”

  “I said the same thing.” Dani took another sip.

  “Kate’s so far-off on that guy, but Robbie’s clueless.”

  “Most guys are,” Dani noted. She set her bottle on the table and mused, “What else do you know?”

  Jonah let out a small grin before he answered, “I know that my sister worries about Kate. I know that my sister feels guilty because she’s always been accepted and Kate has to fight for it. I know that Robbie has a little crush on you. I know that Bubba secretly loves it when Aiden and Kate drag him onto the dancefloor. I know that Stilts has a thing for Lori—you can’t say anything about that, by the way. And I know that Aiden and Kate both really like you.”

  Dani held her breath, but Jonah continued, a slow drawl, “Kate hasn’t been accepted into our social circles and she feels a camaraderie with you because you weren’t either when we were young. And she idolizes you now that you stood up to your sister. Kate’s wanted to do that for years and she hasn’t. She was scared of Erica and she’s scared of Julia. But she likes you. And I think both of them are relieved that they don’t have to talk with Lori or Brooke anymore. There’s another female around so it’s not as obvious when they want to snub Robbie’s girlfriends. And I know that Kate has a little crush on me, but she’ll never act on it. And I know that you let me come here tonight because of a reason. You wouldn’t have, if you really didn’t want me here.”

  They didn’t know her. They really didn’t know anything about her, but they thought they did. And she was a little frightened by how Jonah seemed to already know her too well in the span of a few days.

  “It’s a little alarming how intelligent you are.”

  “Glad that my boss doesn’t think so.” Jonah chuckled. “So, Dani. Tell me. What’s the reason that you wanted me here tonight? Are you going to ravish me? You want me to screw you and you can pretend it’s this other man of yours or Jake? Or…what’s the reason?”

  A normal girl would’ve gotten pissed. But, just as Jonah had pointed out, Dani wasn’t like other females. And she saw right through him. He wanted to make her mad. He wanted her to get riled up because he thought he could get the truth then.

  So she said honestly, without a fight, “It’s the nightmares. Sometimes I hear the water rushing down on us and I hear the screams as everyone is running for cover. I heard a few people get trampled. But it’s the breathing that’s the worst.”

  “A buddy of mine told me once that he could handle the nightmares. He always knew to just expect them, but it was the flashbacks that got him. He said they were an intrusion and just not welcomed. They shouldn’t have been there, but he said it was his brain that was healing itself. It really had nothing to do with him. Guess that helped him. He’s been on the force for another ten years.”

  “What happened to him?”

  “He saw a kid go under and tried to save him, but the undercurrent swept the kid out of his grasp. The body had moved farther down the river by the time he got to him, but it was too late. He said, he saw the life actually leave the boy. He saw it in the eyes.”