“Look, I’m sure I can get somebody to come and clean this up,” Anna looks around. “I don’t think too many people were paying attention.”
“Let him clean it up,” I bark and point at Damon, standing against the wall with his arms crossed.
“Okay, and then why don’t you let me take you home. I still have the keys—”
She pulls out the keychain with my brother’s keys on it and dangles it from her finger. That’s her great mistake because it gives me an idea. I grab the keychain and run out of the house. I can hear her behind me, saying “excuse me” as she pushes through the crowd calling my name. I ignore her and keep moving forward.
Chapter 18
NOW
“I got in!”
Mom looked at me like I’d just screamed rape. I shook the paper in my hand in front of her face. I’d applied for an early decision to my top three schools and then pretty much forgot about it.
With all the things to be miserable and obsessive about, getting into college seemed like the one thing that should be relatively painless. Either I had the chops or I didn’t, and if I wasn’t up to snuff by now there wasn’t anything I could do about it. That was the blessing and the curse of Senior year; either you had made use of your time or you hadn’t, but either way, it was all coming to an end. One way or the other, you had to figure out how to make it work. Adulthood waited for no one. And though not every parent was keen on kicking their kids out as soon as they touched eighteen, the responsibilities of real life were there.
When I saw the letter in the mailbox I was actually surprised. I hadn’t been expecting to hear from them. I probably would have if I paid more attention to things like deadlines and schedules. Maybe then mom would know what I was talking about.
“Okay, which school is that?”
“Mom! My dream school! My number one pick! How can you not know these things? Are you even my mom?”
“Well, sweetie…”
I rolled my eyes and walked away.
It wasn’t that my mom didn’t care. She did. I knew she did. She just seemed to care too much about the wrong things. She was always wondering if I was developing an eating disorder or unhealthy sexual hang-ups. She’d stopped asking about my grades years ago. Maybe that was partly my fault. I was a pretty consistent kid. How many Honor Roll Assemblies did you have to attend before everybody just assumed that if there were certificates to be handed out, I would be getting one of them?
Still, every once in a while it would have been nice for her to worry about the kinds of things normal parents worried about. If I shaved my head, there was no doubt that she would have a list of cults that required their female members to shave their heads and a deprogrammer on speed dial. But early admission to the school of my dreams and she was at a complete loss.
I flopped down on my bed and screamed into my pillow. I knew full well that she wasn’t going to follow me upstairs. She wanted to respect my boundaries and allow me space to process, or whatever nonsense she was getting out of whichever parenting audiobook she was listening to at the moment. At a time like this, it would have been nice to have a friend to call. But that would require me to trust other human beings with my phone number, and they had proven to be horrifically unreliable actors.
And then it hit me.
Damon.
He’s had my number for a few days by now and other than a few texts to ask me to read his essays, he hadn’t used it at all. He also hadn’t given it to anybody else. That wasn’t much, but it was more than I could say for most of the people I’d thought were my friends.
Was it appropriate to call him to gloat about my admission when he was still struggling to submit his applications? Somehow, Damon didn’t strike me as the type who would get hung up on something like that. He was running his own race and marching to his own tune. It wasn’t a competition for him. He just wanted to be able to do the thing he loved, and he wouldn’t begrudge anybody else a little success along the way. At least, I didn’t think he would.
I decided to take a chance. Worst case scenario, he’d decide to give my number out to whichever horrible bitch still thought it would be funny to prank me and I’d change my number again. I dialed and waited silently for the line to connect.
“Hello?”
“Hi, Damon, this is Anna,” I said.
“Anna?” he said, and he sounded confused. “Your number doesn’t show up on my phone.”
“Yeah....well…my number’s blocked,” I said, feeling a tad embarrassed at the fact that he might ask why and I might have to try to find a million ways to avoid answering.
“It’s cool. So what’s up?”
There was no cool or smooth way to tell him what I wanted without looking like a loser, so I decided to bite the bullet and just go for it.
“I have some good news but nobody to tell it to. I was hoping you could listen and pretend to be happy for me.”
“In other words… you’re saying you need a friend?”
I felt a lump climb to the beginnings of my throat. Jesus was this embarrassing.
“Yeah.” I felt foolish, but closed mouths don’t get fed.
“Sure, Anna Henderson, I’ll be your friend and instead of pretending to be happy for you, I’m going to actually be happy for you.”
“Thanks,” I breathed.
“No problem. So, what’s the big news?”
“I got into my dream school.”
“Really?!” he did, indeed, sound genuinely happy.
“Yeah, I just got the letter this afternoon. I got accepted. I just need to hear from a few other schools and…well, I’ll have to see what kind of financial aid package I’m getting, but just getting accepted is like a dream come true. I’m so damn stoked I feel like I’m seconds removed from getting this letter framed.”
“You should,” he said, so earnestly that if he was faking his excitement for me, it would make him a pretty damn good actor. “Oh man, we should celebrate.”
“We should. Wait, this isn’t your way of getting me to read your essays for you, is it?”
“You already agreed to do that anyway.” There was a pause and then a deep breath before Damon decided to fill the silence. “You haven’t had too much to smile about lately.”
“True,” I said, answering honestly. “So what do you have in mind?”
“I don’t know, what do eggheads do during the offseason?”
“You should find out pretty quick. If you’re going to be a vet, you’re going to be joining our ranks pretty soon. How about we go for ice cream?”
“Sounds great!”
By eight-fifteen I was standing outside of my house, waiting for Damon to pick me up. My mother decided that it would be too cruel to forbid me from leaving the house to get ice cream with the only friend I’d had in months and comforted herself by watching me through the kitchen window as I waited for Damon to arrive.
We were just two friends getting ice cream.
Nothing more.
My mother had her hopes up, though.
Damon was gorgeous and dare I say, charming, and the fact that he treated me like a person definitely made him uniquely qualified to be crushed on. If I’d managed to successfully bleach Adam from my heart, then maybe there would have been a chance. But right now, I really just needed a friend. And that was what he was offering. Friendship. I’d have been a fool not to take it. If something else comes of this, though…then I guess it’d be another hurdle to tackle.
As my mind ran, the lights of an approaching car came into view. I was more than happy to see it drawing nearer and nearer and forgot all about my wayward thoughts. So happy, in fact, that I didn’t recognize the rebuilt Volvo behind the headlights until it was too late.
“Get in!” The voice said. It wasn’t a question, but a demand. And one he had no right to issue.
“Adam? What the hell are you doing here?” I looked over my shoulder. If my mother was still peeking out the window, it would take her less than two point five
seconds to storm out here and rip Adam a new one.
He stopped the car and got out without killing the lights or turning the engine off. As he walked toward me, he looked worse than I’d seen him in a long time.
My reaction was a mechanic one. I was stepping closer to him, my heart thumping in my chest at the grim look on his face.
“Did something happen?” I whispered, moving even closer toward him. My mind immediately went to his sister. She was wheelchair bound, yes. But she was no longer at risk of losing her life.
“What?” he said, raking his fingers through his hair. The look on his face now didn’t scream death of a loved one.
My heart settled.
My common sense found its place.
“You look like shit,” I deadpanned and took a step back to put more distance between us.
Adam scrubbed his face with his hands and scratched his head. Something was wrong. But not something as bad as his sister getting even more life altering news. Adam looked broken and I shuddered at the thought that maybe Angelique fucked up. Maybe he was here looking for a shoulder to lean on. If that was the case, Adam was even more of an idiot than I thought.
“I didn’t sleep well last night,” he said, and I rolled my eyes.
“Not my problem.”
“I haven’t been sleeping well for a long time,” he continued. When he shifted his eyes to meet mine, I looked away. No matter how much I wanted to not give a shit about Adam, I knew just how easily his eyes could disarm me.
“I wanted to see you.”
“So you decided to drop by unannounced?”
“I didn’t exactly think this through.” There was a vulnerability in his smile and a softness behind the trouble in his eyes, begging me to lower my guards, if only for a minute. I knew better. Of course I did.
Opening myself to him even a little bit was more than just damaging. It was stupid. And I learned a long time ago just how much stupid could wreck even the smartest people.
“I also didn’t expect to find you out on the curb,” he said, and I waited and waited and waited for the punchline, but it never came.
“And yet, here I am.”
Adam raked his fingers through his hair again, and my eyes, much to my dismay, followed his actions.
“Do you think we can talk?”
“Isn’t that exactly what we’re doing?” I shot back.
He shook his head and let out a short, low, humorless laugh. “I mean away from here. Somewhere private.”
“I’m expecting someone,” I said and intentionally allowed my eyes to drift to the road. Where the hell was Damon, anyway?
Adam’s jaw tensed, but relaxed so quickly I’d have missed it if I had blinked. He kicked a rock on the ground and shoved his hands into his pockets.
“Can you take a ride with me?”
“Jesus Christ, Adam. That’s not how this works. Not anymore.”
He arched a brow at me. The same brow he used to arch. The same way he used to arch it. It was a practiced look that never ceased to get from me just what he wanted. But we weren’t Adam and Anna anymore. Despite how derailed that look might have had me feeling, I knew better than to think it meant what it used to mean.
Adam inched closer and in no time, his hand was on me, squeezing into my shoulder, rubbing tension away only to replace it. And my heart, that feeble fucking thing, it skipped a beat and then another.
“Adam, no.”
“Anna, please.”
He stroked the back of my neck now, disarming me even more. For the first time in forever I fucking wished my mother was playing the peeping Tom. Because she wouldn’t have allowed me to cave. She wouldn’t have allowed me to talk to Adam, to consider a word he was saying, to get into a car with him.
“I’ll drop you off wherever you’re meant to be.”
“I’m not really keen on showing up in your car. No offense, but the last thing I need is anyone seeing us together.” I didn’t want to end up the subject of another rumor and spend the next six weeks enduring bullshit from misguided girls intent on defending Angelique’s honor.
“I’ll drop you down the street.”
I rolled my eyes, but took out my phone and sent a message to Damon, telling him about our change of plans. Because yes, smart as I was, I was also an idiot.
Great. I’m running late anyway. Meet you there, sprinkles are on me. Damon’s reply came only a short minute later.
“Done,” I said and told Adam where I was to be taken. He agreed, promising he would try his hardest to wrap up the conversation by the time we got there.
Adam looked over his shoulder and ushered me to the passenger side. He held the door open and closed it the same way he always did. A part of me hated him for it. This wasn’t a reconciliation. It took me forever and a half to get used to the bridge that had broken between me and Adam. This closeness, this whiff of normalcy, it would send me spiraling once again. On the bright side, at least I was already in therapy.
Locked in the confines of Adam’s car, I felt uncomfortable and short on air. We both sat in the gloomy silence as the street signs zoomed right by us. Neither of us saying the things we really wanted to say.
It wasn’t long ago that knowing where we were headed would be a mystery, because my attention would be one-hundred percent focused on Adam. Right now, that wasn’t the case. Head pointed toward the passenger window, I watched as the world went by. I was so focused was on the outside that I didn’t miss the moment Adam whizzed right by the turn he was meant to take.
“Hey, you’re going the wrong way,” I said.
He kept his eyes on the road and didn’t say anything.
“Adam! This isn’t funny. Pull over and let me out.”
He sped up.
“Where the hell are you taking me?” My heart began to pound as I considered the very real possibility that getting in the car with Adam had been the worst decision I’d made in a very long while. So bad in fact that it might just be the last one I ever get to make.
When he took the exit ramp for the highway, I knew I was in trouble. I grabbed my cell phone and he finally looked my way, snatching it from my hand and sticking it in his pants.
“Don’t do that,” he scolded.
“Adam…I need you to let me out of this car and give me my phone back.” I tried my best to keep the panic out of my voice, but I doubted I was very successful at it.
“I’m not gonna fucking hurt you,” he said, but the words didn’t sound very certain on his lips. “Remember how we used to talk, Anna? Remember how easy it used to be? How easy everything used to be?”
“Adam! This isn’t the time for trips down memory lane. You are kidnapping me right now! Do you understand that? You are taking me someplace against my will!”
“You agreed to come. I didn’t force you to get into the car,” he said, mostly to himself. He was seriously coming unhinged, and that was what scared me the most. Sane Adam hated me. He might even do something to scare me or humiliate me, but he would never hurt me. But crazy Adam? I had no idea what he was capable of. Or what happened since the last time I saw him to have the turn of events be what they are right now.
Terror crept up my spine and there was nothing I could do to shake it. I had every reason to be scared. Every right to be terrified. I begged Adam to let me go. Pleaded with him. It didn’t matter where he let me out, in the middle of the road or on the side of it, anywhere would be better than where he was taking me.
No matter what I said, Adam didn’t budge. He kept his eyes forward and his scowl in place. What exactly was going to happen, I wasn’t sure. But what I knew without a shadow of doubt, was that it wasn’t going to be something good.
Adam took another quick turn two exits up the highway and I knew immediately where we were going. It was an abandoned hunting cabin, or at least it had been back when this area was able to support wildlife. Now it was a dilapidated old cabin hidden in the woods that teens used to smoke weed and get laid.
Or murder their ex-girlfriends.
Chapter 19
NOW
I didn’t want to die. Scared as I was when Eva’s car went hurtling down the precipice at the side of the road, I’m not sure I was as riddled with fear as I am now. The look in Adam’s eyes scream murder and no matter how much I begged, or how much I pleaded, how soft I spoke or how serious my tone, he was not listening.
Throwing the car into park, he turned to me, an indecipherable look etched into each corner of his face.
“Get out of the car.”
Now, I wasn’t so sure. “Fuck that,” I hissed. “I’m not getting out of the car.” I crossed my arms over my chest and stared at him.
“Weren’t you just begging me to stop the car so you could get out. Now the car is stopped and you can get out.”
Adam stepped out of the car and walked around to my side. I wrapped my arm in the seat belt. He was going to have to drag me out of the car to murder me. There was no fucking way I was going to simply walk towards my death. If he was going to go all psycho-ex on me there was going to be plenty of physical evidence in his car to clean up.
“I promised I wouldn’t hurt you. So far I have kept my word. Right? Let’s talk.”
“I can hear you fine from where I’m sitting.”
Adam exhaled and looked at me the way you look at a three-year-old throwing a temper tantrum.
“I forgot, I’m just some asshole to you.”
I scoffed.
“You’re one to talk.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means that you decided I was an asshole a long time ago. I don’t remember whining about it. And I certainly didn’t kidnap you to talk it out!”
“No, you just wrote me off like I was some loser!”
“I wrote YOU off?” Obviously he was living on a whole different planet. One without oxygen. “When half the school thought that I ran a car up a tree to murder your sister who did you believe?”
Filthy Pride: Dark Bully Romance Page 12