by T. S. Joyce
“No,” Link whispered. He shook his head back and forth in denial, his snow-colored eyes on Clayton.
“Putting out the kill order on Cole was the hardest thing I’ve ever done, second only to putting down your father. I watched my best friend, your father, Eris McCall, slowly lose his mind, and I was the only enforcer left to end his life. And it broke something inside me to kill him.” Clayton dragged his gaze from Link to Ian. “I know I’m a shit father, but I know what you’ll endure when you’re called on to put Link down, Ian, and I don’t want that for you. It’ll haunt you forever. I thought I had to make you three tough, harder than this world. Because it was my fault. I made you. I put those bears in you, and I knew from the day you were born that you would suffer because of my decision to become a father. Eris made me promise him something. We were sitting on the porch of his cabin, watching Cole, Miller, and Link play in the yard, and they were so little. Laughing and jumping around like little grasshoppers. Good boys, destined to turn into monsters. Eris was already half-gone, growling all the time, Changing uncontrollably, eyes white, talking to himself. He made me promise to save his boys from the McCall curse. And I failed—” Clayton’s voice broke on the last word, and he swallowed over and over, his eyes on his clenched hands in his lap now. “I failed Cole, and I failed Miller, and I made questionable decisions and hurt Vera inconceivably because all I could think about was saving Eris’s boys. After Cole and Miller chased their deaths, I wanted Vera to work on the cure until she could fix Link so I could keep part of my promise to Eris. Because I thought saving Link would save a part of me that had been broken the day my best friend died under my claws.”
Link sat heavily in the chair beside Nicole and scrubbed his hands over his face, over and over. “I only remember the bad parts of my father. He died when my brothers and I were young, and we were raised by my uncles. Cole and Miller turned out just like them.”
Clayton looked exhausted as he nodded and murmured, “I hated that part. I’d hoped all three of you would be more like Eris. I couldn’t do anything for Cole and Miller, but you’re different. You’re like your dad. Good. Loyal. Redeemable.”
Link slid his hand forward and Clayton grasped it in a tight handshake. “Thank you for taking care of my father.” Link firmly shook his hand one last time, then stood and left the room. The front door opened and closed a moment later.
“Excuse me,” Nicole whispered as she stood to follow him out.
She pulled her jacket from the coat rack and went outside. She followed Link’s boot prints until she found his pile of clothes. Wolf sat in the snow watching her as she approached, zipping her jacket as she did.
Arching his head back, he let off a howl, low and quiet at first, then building—a beautiful wolf song.
Nicole fell onto her knees in the snow beside him, the closest she’d ever been to Wolf. And as he lifted his nose to the falling snow and began his song again, she wrapped her arms around his neck and rested her cheek against his coarse fur.
Link was the man of a thousand heartbreaks, yet he was still here, still trying. He was a true survivor, and for the rest of his life, she would fill as many of his moments with happiness as she could.
This was her silent promise to the man she’d fallen in love with because Clayton had been right.
Link was good.
Wolf was loyal.
And both of them were redeemable.
Chapter Thirteen
“Rise and shine, porcupines!” Vera sang.
Link groaned as the lights flipped on, and he hugged Nicole closer, then pulled the comforter over their heads. “Just ignore her, and she’ll go away.”
“False,” Vera said. “Ignore me, and I’ll bring the ice bucket. Come on, love birds, shake your feathers. The early bird gets the worm. Wakey, wakey, eggs and bakey. Or eggs and cakey. I like cake. Tobias! Can you put cake mix on the grocery list?”
“Vera,” Link growled as Nicole giggled quietly against his chest.
“I’ve made good luck waffles!” she sang in an opera voice. “Link!”
Link threw off the covers and glared at the doorway where Vera stood in a pair of warm looking llama pajamas.
She pointed her finger and whispered, “Your dick is showing.”
Nicole pursed her lips, but her shoulders were shaking from laughter now. She’d snuggled into her warmest pajamas for this little slumber party, but Link hadn’t bothered putting on a stitch of clothing after he’d Changed back into his human self last night. Apparently, werewolves had no modesty.
Link looked at his cell phone on the night stand and growled. “You made good luck waffles at four in the morning?”
“You’re welcome,” Vera said as she disappeared down the hallway. “Get up or I’ll bite you.”
Link’s eyes rolled closed, and he let off a long, annoyed sigh. While he was distracted with his irritation, Nicole took the opportunity to hug him closer and sniff his skin. He smelled different right out of sleep, and she loved that she was the one who got to snuggle against him like this. He’d relaxed in the night, and when he smiled down at her, his eyes were a shade between gray and white.
“Do you feel better this morning?”
“Loads better,” he said, kissing her forehead. “And I’ll feel even better after the hunt.”
“Hunt?” she asked.
“We’re low on red meat, and the caribou have dipped lower in the valleys where it won’t be so miserable to hunt them. Tobias has been scouting their movements.”
“Oh. But I can just buy us more red meat from the store in Galena.”
Link leaned down and kissed her lips softly, then eased her back and leveled her with a look. “I love that you have the means to take care of yourself, but money is temporary. Even if you can cover us for five years, you’ll get accustomed to that lifestyle and won’t acclimate to Alaska. If you were living in Anchorage, it would be different. You would work a steady job and meat wouldn’t get scarce. But in Galena, you haven’t seen the meat section in the store lately. It’s mid-winter now, and any meat you can find is expensive.”
“Why?”
“Because the people here hunt their own meat, and even if they didn’t, it’s hard to get deliveries here between the storms. Ian and Tobias run deliveries from bush planes, but they’re grounded half the time because of the weather. And it’ll get worse as winter goes on. You need to learn how to hunt protein for yourself.”
“For us,” she said with a frown.
“For us,” he amended quietly. “Wolf needs this.”
“Oh. Well, why didn’t you just say that? Wolf needs to hunt?”
Link dipped his chin to his chest in answer. “He isn’t fighting the meds, Nicole, because he wants to stay here, too. You know what he said when we first saw you?”
“Oh gosh, I literally have no guess.”
“He wanted to fuck you and put a baby in you before Ian killed us. That’s where we were at—the desperate procreation part of our little crazy-party.”
“Jesus.” She bit her lip and studied his troubled eyes. “What does he say now?”
“That he wants to fuck you and put a baby in you so we can hold it and take care of the two of you. So he can raise his pup.”
Chills blasted across her forearms as she imagined Link holding their child, smiling down at the little bundle in his arms. She suddenly wanted that more than anything in the world, and it was the new goal. Save Link and build a family with him. Nicole hugged him tighter to absorb his warmth. “Wolf has hope.”
Link’s lips lingered on top of her hair. “We both do. This makes Wolf sick, though, so when I have a good day off the meds, I need to make him happy. Hunting makes him happy.”
“I’m coming with you.”
“Thata girl.”
“Waffles!” Vera yelled from the kitchen.
Link laughed and rolled out of bed. “We’re coming.”
“That’s what she said,” Vera called.
Nicole s
norted and shook her head as she made her way into the bathroom. By the time she was scrubbed, brushed, and dressed for the day, Vera, Tobias, and Link were already cracking up in the kitchen.
For a minute, Nicole leaned her back against the hallway wall and closed her eyes, just listening to the sound of Link’s deep laughter. God, she loved him.
When she strode around the corner, Link lifted his head immediately. His greeting smile was breathtaking in the soft glow of the single light above him. They sat around the kitchen island, digging into a pile of waffles stacked so high they teetered dangerously and bowls of whipped cream, strawberries, blueberries, several flavors of syrup, and assorted jams. Link wore a pair of jeans but no shirt, and Tobias was dressed much the same. So many muscles in one room.
Vera swatted her ass as she sidled up to the table and grabbed an empty plate. “Mornin’ sunshine. Heard ya got boned last night.”
“Vera,” Tobias groaned.
Link just shook his head and ate another bite, like he was used to Vera’s antics, but Nicole laughed and apologized through her blazing blush. “I tried to be quiet.”
Vera pointed to her ears. “Fox hearing. So, if you need any extra warm clothes, I have some you can borrow. It’s cold as a witch’s puckered teat out there, and you’ll be on a snow machine most of today.”
“Are you not going? I thought Tobias has been scouting.”
“Nope.” Vera shoved a wedding magazine toward her. “Today, I feel like wedding planning, and Tobias has offered to help.”
“Yeah, offered,” her behemoth mate muttered, then grinned and dodged Vera’s swat. “She’s covering everything in glitter. Do you know they can make glittery icing for wedding cakes?”
“And it’ll be pink to match my dress,” Vera said dreamily.
Around an enormous bite of waffle, Tobias said, “We’ll all have the glitter-shits for a week.”
“It’ll be wonderful,” Vera whispered through a faraway smile. Blinking hard, she said, “After Link is all better, of course. You have one day off the meds, and then you need to stop by here after the hunt.”
“Can he give the injections to himself?” Nicole asked, taking a seat on the stool next to Link.
“He can, but each one is different, so he has to get them from me.”
“How does it work?”
“Oh God, run,” Tobias said with a wink.
Vera offered her mate a glare and then canted her head. “I’ll give you the simple explanation.”
“I’d appreciate it. Chemistry wasn’t my favorite subject in school.”
“It’s more like molecular biology and genetics. I’m basically giving Link some pretty brutal viruses that repair his damaged McCall DNA. The viruses are why he gets so sick. No human would survive this process, but Link has werewolf healing, which gives him a chance. I just need time. Each virus he survives gets him that much closer to keeping his sanity.”
That sounded horrible. Swallowing a bite of fruity waffle that had suddenly turned to cement in her mouth, Nicole asked, “Will he be on the medicine forever?”
“No. The idea is to get the right combination of viruses in the right order that his body can handle, and when he is okay enough to stay even, I’ll wean him off. If I can get the right combination of viruses for Link, I can improve the serums and eventually cure the McCall curse for all his living lineage. If the douche-buckets don’t go on killing sprees first.” She swung her attention to Link. “I mean, frankly, I don’t even want to cure your family because most of them went after Elyse. And they’re thieves and users, the lot of them. No offense.”
Link set his fork on his empty plate with a tink, then leaned back and slid his hand over Nicole’s thigh. “None taken. I was there when the McCalls stole from countless people who were just trying to survive. I heard them brag about brutalizing women and cheer each other on when they went on a manhunt.” His voice dipped lower. “I was there when they hunted Elyse. I don’t harbor any affection for the McCalls. Most of them turn terrible before the insanity even hits.”
“Because the pack went rotten,” Tobias murmured, leaning over his half-eaten breakfast. “You did yourself a huge favor the day you broke away from them. You’d be in the ground long before now if you’d stayed.”
“So, Clayton…” Nicole murmured, watching her mate’s face to gauge his reaction.
“Yeah, that kind of blew my mind.”
“I’ve hated him for so long,” Tobias admitted, “and now I feel like I’m on unstable ground. I mean, he was still a shit dad, and I still want to rip his intestines out through his mouth hole for what he did to Vera, but in some sick way, I kind of get it. He had to put his best friend down after his mate left him.” Tobias lifted his gaze to Link. “I can’t even imagine if Vera left me and then I had to put you down. Maybe I’d do the same messed up stuff to keep a promise to you.”
“Aw, bromance,” Vera said, looking mushy. “You two should bro-hug.”
Tobias growled out a very human-sounding noise, and Vera laughed. “Can’t growl at me, McBeefcake. Your bear is sound asleep.”
Link huffed a laugh and shook his head, then cleared the empty dishes to the sink. And while he rinsed them, Nicole helped Vera put everything away as Tobias pulled out a map and spread it out over the kitchen table.
After Tobias and Link had decided the best way to caribou territory and they’d packed enough supplies for a two-day hunt into the back of the sled behind Link’s snow machine, Nicole said her goodbyes and thank-yous to the two people who already felt like dear friends.
Nicole was nervous about the first hunt away from the cabin. Hardware Jack had taught her about rifles, and Link had worked with her on her aim relentlessly, but until now, she’d only taken birds and snared rabbits alongside her mate. Everything else had come from the grocery store or Link’s meat cache from his cabin. But she should be a part of this. She’d grown up thinking that red meat just came from a grocery store, but it didn’t. There was a process to getting it from the animal to the table, and she wanted to learn about respectfully and legally taking an animal. She’d taken her hunter safety course in Mission and even bought herself a hunting license, but a part of her had never really believed she would use a single tag. However, now when she thought about it, it was almost laughable that she’d expected to live out in the Alaskan wilderness and not learn this essential part of life here. Plus, she was mated to a werewolf, and unless she wanted to become some coddled, kept woman, she needed to learn to keep up.
As she adjusted her goggles and thick winter hat and pulled the green scarf tighter around her face, she suddenly realized that not a single Silver had asked or even stared at her birthmark. She’d forgotten about it completely for the first time in her life.
“Link?”
He ripped the motor and twisted around in his seat in front of her as the exhaust from the snow machine surrounded them. “Yeah? Here, let me help. You’ll get frostbite if your cheeks are exposed.” He pulled her scarf higher to cover everything up to her goggles.
“Did you tell the Silvers about my birthmark?”
“No. Why would I? You’re beautiful.”
Heat crept into her cheeks at his unexpected compliment. “Well, they didn’t ask about it.”
Link frowned and slid a pair of sunglasses over his sparking eyes. “Why would they? It’s just a mark. Elyse has a big scar down her face, and no one cares about that either. The Silver brothers are covered in marks from enforcer jobs and from fighting other bears. I have scars from wolf fights and friggin’ Vera the Chompy Fox. Who cares about perfection? It’s the imperfections that give you character out here.” He kissed her over the scarf until she giggled, and then he pulled her arms around his waist and hit the handlebar throttle.
Stunned, she turned and waved to Vera and Tobias, who stood on the front porch seeing them off.
“Bring us back a yummy roast!” Vera called and blew tiny kisses with her fingertips.
As the cabin dis
appeared through the blurring trees, another layer of belonging slid over Nicole’s shoulders. Now she did really want to have a successful hunt because she could give Tobias and Vera part of the meat as a thank you for last night, for this morning, and for Vera working to save her mate. It wouldn’t be just a trinket or useless gift either. It would be something that would aid in their survival. Now she understood why Elyse ran cattle, and why everyone around the homestead helped maintain the herd, even Elyse’s brother, Josiah. Out here, the best thing you could do for loved ones was keep them fed, keep them from hard times, and keep them healthy.
Buck—er, Dad—had done that for the people he cared about.
Nicole hugged Link’s waist tighter and rested her cheek against his back as the wind whipped the untucked end of her green scarf around her.
It was incredible getting to know her father in this way. She’d come to Alaska so scared that she would eventually go back to Kansas disappointed and have no better idea about where she came from or about the man who had been there when she was a baby. But instead, she got tiny, daily glimpses of him from the people around here and from Link.
Forty-five minutes of snowy driving later, and Link stopped the snow machine and pointed to a towering tree with a charred split in the middle from lightning. “This is the beginning of Buck’s trap-line.”
“It is?”
“This is Fire Tree, the very beginning of the line. I’m going to take you along it so you can see what Buck did for work. You’ll see where he spent his days and the woods he loved. He sold and traded fur during the winter, and that’s how he took care of Clotilda, and when you were a baby, it’s how he took care of you and your mom.”
“Link,” she said on a breath. “I was just thinking about him.” It was as if he’d been reading her mind, and now he was giving her another present—another piece of her dad.