“Yeah, I found that out when it was too late,” he snapped, giving her a dark scowl.
“Did she ever tell you why she didn’t want to marry you?”
“No, but obviously she found something wrong with me. I’ve come to the conclusion, she was just plain afraid of me.”
“It wasn’t so much you that was the problem.”
“Really? You could have fooled me. She ran off, crying, on a horse that was way too much for her to control, and broke her neck.”
“I’m doing a horrible job of explaining this.”
“Well, I couldn’t agree with you more there,” he said on a deep sigh, shaking his head.
“She didn’t want to marry you, because she was terrified of all men. Not just you.”
“What?”
“It wasn’t just you.”
“How could that be?”
“Well, it was her mother’s fault,” she sighed, shaking her head. “I really shouldn’t speak ill of the dead.”
“Her mother’s dead?”
“After learning about what happened to her daughter, and why, she just gave up. The guilt ate away at her to the point she wouldn’t eat. She could barely sleep. She just sat in the parlor all day, mourning. She was gone within a year.”
“You said she felt guilty. What did she do?”
“Rachel’s mother never really cared much for Mr. Jones, but she stayed with him until Rachel turned sixteen. She had finally had enough and decided she was going to go live with her sister. She wanted to take Rachel with her. Mr. Jones refused, saying Rachel would stay with him until he could marry her off to a wealthy husband. She got her revenge by making sure if he ever managed to marry her off, her husband would be sure to send her back weeks, possibly days later.”
“How?”
“By making sure she feared the marriage bed. She told Rachel it was all very painful and disgusting, and that only the men ever enjoy it.”
“Why would she do that to her own daughter?”
“Trying to stop him from selling their only child to the highest bidder. That’s all Mr. Jones talked about for years. Finding the wealthiest husband, they could for Rachel. He wanted to share the wealth and power. He thought he’d found that in you.”
“I still don’t understand why she would do that to her own daughter.”
“Elizabeth had been forced to marry for the same reasons. When her and Mr. Jones married he was a lot wealthier. As a matter-of-fact, he was about the wealthiest from where he came from. It was old family money. He lost a lot of that wealth when he moved out here. None of his ventures paid off like he thought they would. He was a cold man, more focused on making money and gaining power than spending time with his wife and daughter. Rachel’s mother wanted something different for her daughter. She wanted her to be able to marry for love.”
“After what she did, that would never have happened either.”
“I believe over time, Mrs. Jones would have relented, and explained things to Rachel. She would have admitted she lied. Unfortunately, Mr. Jones forced her to marry you, her pleas falling on death ears.”
“I never knew. All I knew was, within twenty-four hours of our marrying, she was dead, and she had left a note that said she had never wanted to marry me. I always figured it was something with me that she didn’t like.”
“No.”
“Why tell me this now?”
“At first, I blamed you, as well.”
“I would have never married her, had I known.”
“I know that now. I’ve learned more about you over the last four years. My point in telling you all of this is, you really need to give your young wife a chance. She came out here to marry. She’s never tried to run from you.” He just nodded his head, not sure what to say.
“Well, good day, Mr. Townsend,” she said, finally turning to walk away. She was nowhere in sight when he finally realized he had never learned her name. She had, however, given him a lot to think about. And some hope.
Chapter 12
Thursday, June 10
Sadie was already up when Tobias climbed out of bed at five thirty, the sun just barely starting to rise. When he found her in the kitchen, already rolling out biscuit dough, he noticed she was extremely pale, and looked very tired.
“Sadie, how long have you been up?” he asked, the concern showing on his face.
She shrugged, not looking up at him. “Since about four thirty.”
“Why so early?” he asked, crossing his arms over his chest. He gave her a pinched look, wondering if she had been throwing up again.
“No reason,” she mumbled. “I was just having trouble sleeping.”
“Having trouble sleeping?” he snorted, his irritation obvious. “You look like you haven’t slept in a week.”
She turned then, giving him a hurt look. “Do I really look that bad?”
He sighed, rubbing his temples. He had to keep reminding himself to be careful with what he said to her. She had been taking everything he said far more seriously than he intended it, of late. “You just look tired, is all. Why don’t you go back and lay down? I can get Thad to finish the biscuits. And I’ll help him get the rest of breakfast ready for all of us.”
“No,” she shook her head. “This is my responsibility. You all have enough to do without having to take over my work, as well.” She was afraid if they had to start doing the cooking and cleaning again, it would be enough of a reason for him to send her back. If she were sick for the next nine months, being pregnant with his child might not be enough to persuade him to let her stay.
He walked over taking her hands in his. “Sadie, I know you’ve been throwing up. You need to rest.”
She gasped, giving him an almost frightened look. “I’m alright, I promise.”
He shook his head, wondering what it was she was afraid he was going to say. She couldn’t help being sick. “Everyone gets sick at times. Please, go get some rest.”
She took a relieved breath, then nodded. “Okay.” She turned toward the door, but stopped before going through. “I need some things from Harris’. Would it be possible to go today?”
He gave her a big smile, thinking maybe they were making some progress. This was the first time she had asked him for something without going through one of his brothers. “Sure. Once you have rested for a little bit, and we have all eaten. I’ll get everyone started on what needs to be done today. Then, if you are feeling up to it, I’ll take you into town, myself.”
“Thank you,” she smiled back, looking more like herself, already. “That sounds wonderful.”
*******
After resting for about an hour, Sadie got up feeling much better, and thinking she might actually be able to hold down something for a change. She walked out of the bedroom to find everyone had eaten, and the kitchen was clean, except for a covered plate of food sitting on the still warm stove.
No sooner than she had stepped in the room, Wally had turned and sat the plate on the table, and pulled a chair out for her. “Here you go, Sadie. Tobias wanted to make sure you ate something. He’s been worried about your throwing up for the last few days.”
“Oh, I’m alright. You don’t have to wait on me,” she smiled. “I’m sure you have better things to do.”
“Tobias told me to make sure you were eating before I run out to tell him you are awake. You don’t want me to get in trouble, do you?”
She smiled at the boy, shaking her head at his crafty words. She knew Tobias really wouldn’t blame him for her not eating. “No, I guess not,” she said, taking her seat so he could push her chair up to the table.
“Do you want some milk to drink? Or do you want coffee?” he asked, working really hard to keep a neutral expression. He had no memories of his mother being pregnant. He was still learning to walk when his little sister had been born. But the other night he overheard his brothers, Cade and Ezekiel, talking about how his mother had thrown up a lot when she was pregnant with Jolie. They were both thinking Sadi
e was pregnant, now. That was a conversation he was sure he wasn’t supposed to have heard, but he was hoping they were right. I would like, very much, not to be the youngest for a change. Like his mother, his sister hadn’t been around long enough for him to remember her much, either.
Besides, Cade and Ezekiel both said they thought Tobias might come around quicker once Sadie was pregnant. Another conversation he was sure he wasn’t supposed to have heard.
“I think I better drink water with a little ginger in it,” she grimaced. “It might help settle my stomach. Then maybe I can have some milk.”
He gave her a big grin, darting over to get her a glass of water.
“Wally, I need hot water, like for coffee,” she said, stopping him before he pumped water into a glass. “It’s the only way the ginger will get into the water.”
He nodded his head, turning to get the kettle they used to heat water for coffee. Sadie always drank coffee with breakfast. If she wanted milk instead, he might just be getting that niece or nephew he was hoping for.
*******
“Well, hello, Mrs. Townsend,” Mrs. Harris greeted her as she stepped through the door to the general store. “How are you doing today?”
“Better than I did this morning,” she smiled. “And please, call me Sadie. While I’m exceedingly happy to be married to Tobias, the missus sounds so formal. In such a small town, it seems so out of place.”
“You think Sapphire Springs is a small town?” Mrs. Harris asked, giving her a big smile.
“I came from New York City. Maybe out here, this little town seems larger. I don’t know. But where I come from, this is small. And most certainly, less formal. I love the differences. People out here are far friendlier.”
Mrs. Harris chuckled. “Well, I’m glad you like all of us. You’ve definitely made a difference in that ornery Tobias. He’s been a lot happier in the last few weeks.”
Sadie blushed, but still managed a shy smile. “Well, I certainly hope so. I’m really happy here.”
“So, what brings you in today, Sadie?” she asked with a wink.
“I need more fabric.”
“You’re making yourself another dress?”
“No,” she shook her head, blushing some more. “I need fabric for baby clothes.”
“Oh, I see,” she smiled. “Does Tobias know yet?”
“No,” she shook her head. “I wanted to wait a little longer. You know, to be sure everything is going to be okay. It’s still early yet.”
“Yes, I understand,” she said, leading her over to the fabric. “We have some new fabric in that I think might meet your needs just fine.”
By the time she and Mrs. Harris had looked through all the fabric and found what she wanted, Tobias had come back from his errands and was ready to go. Mrs. Harris was still wrapping up the last bit of fabric when he walked in the door. He noticed it, wondering what she was planning on doing with it, but didn’t bother to ask her. She breathed a sigh of relief when she realized he wasn’t going to say anything, and gave him a big smile. “Hello, Tobias. I’ll be ready when Mrs. Harris is through wrapping my purchases.”
“That sounds fine. Do you feel like eating at the café, before we head back to the ranch?” he asked, picking up her already wrapped parcels.
“Yes, I’m feeling much better. That would be wonderful.”
Chapter 13
Monday, June 14
Tobias frowned as he watched Sadie dash from the kitchen the same way she had for the last six days at this time. The first few days he had thought she was sick. By day four he had suspected something different entirely, but had decided to give her a few more days to choose when to tell him. Now, on day seven, he was certain he was right. With a grim look on his chiseled features, he followed her down the hall to the water closet. He stood behind her, at the door, waiting for her retching to stop before he spoke.
“Sadie, do you have something to tell me?” he asked, uncertain how he felt right then. He wanted children, but after his mother died while having his sister, the thought of Sadie going through childbirth terrified him.
“No, I don’t believe so,” she mumbled, keeping her head down, not wanting to look him in the eyes.
“Are you sure about that?” he snarled. “I’ve seen a woman get sick like this before.”
“I don’t know what you mean,” she said, taking a deep breath, trying to settle her stomach. “I’m fine.”
“Why don’t you want to tell me?” he snapped back, sounding almost hurt.
“There’s nothing to tell,” she said, still keeping her head down.
“Just how long have you known you were pregnant, Sadie?” Tobias asked, snarling at his wife as she hung her head over the commode.
She looked up at him, shaking her head. “I don’t know what you mean.”
“Sure, you do. If you’re far enough along for me to notice, there’s no way you don’t already know.”
“I...”
“Don’t try to lie to me again,” he boomed, nearly rattling the walls of the little room. “How long have you known you were pregnant?”
“About three weeks,” she answered, trying her hardest not to cry.
“What, does having my baby disgust you that much?” he snarled, wanting to pound his fist into the wall.
“No,” she said, giving him a startled look. “How could you think something like that?”
“Then why are you crying?” he asked, throwing his hands wide.
“Because I was hoping you wouldn’t notice until it was too late.”
“Too late for what?” he asked, just sounding baffled.
“I was hoping by the time you realized I was pregnant, you would need the physical side of our relationship as much as I do, and you wouldn’t be able to stop. It’s really the only relationship I have with you. It’s the only time I feel close to you, and now I’m about to lose that, as well.”
She had stood, and now pushed passed him to leave, not realizing the stunned look she was leaving behind her.
*******
“How did my wife know what I had said about getting her pregnant?” Tobias snarled at Ezekiel on his way through the barn door.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“There’s no way she could have heard from anyone but you. I didn’t tell anyone else. And we were out on the range when I said it. Not another soul for miles, but the horses.”
“Maybe Gray Wind told her.”
“You’re not funny,” he snarled.
“Would you, please, tell me exactly what your problem is?” Ezekiel snapped, finally getting his fill of his brother’s snarly attitude.
“Sadie heard I was planning on getting her pregnant, then moving her back to her old bedroom,” he grumbled, running his hand through his hair before putting his hat back on.
“And?”
“She’s pregnant.”
“That’s what you wanted, isn’t it?”
“Yeah, but she’s known for three weeks, and I just figured it out today.”
“So, what?” he shrugged. “It’s not like you give her any reason to want to talk to you.”
“She doesn’t want me to move her back to her bedroom.”
“Oh, no,” Ezekiel said, slapping his hands to his face, feigning horror. “Whatever are you going to do? Your wife wants to sleep in the same bed with you, and she’s not afraid of you touching her. How could your life be so horrible?”
“Shut up,” he snarled, turning to storm back out of the barn. “Get started. I have something to take care of.”
“Only if that something is your wife,” he growled, slamming his fists on his hips.
Tobias didn’t bother to turn back, he just kept going, heading back toward the house. His plainspoken brother had finally made him realize something. Sadie was neither afraid of him, or disgusted by him. She wasn’t running. At least not yet. But if he didn’t set things right soon, she might.
He had reached the back door, b
ut stood there with his hand raised to the knob, uncertain how to proceed. After a few seconds, he shook himself deciding his course of action was obvious. The truth.
He opened the door slowly, not wanting to startle her, and found her standing at the sink with her back to him. “Sadie,” he said in as gentle a voice as he could, knowing how hurtful he’d already been this morning.
“Yes?” she sniffled, refusing to turn around.
He walked up behind her and wrapped his hands around her upper arms, just so he could touch her. What he really wanted to do was, pull her into his chest and wrap his arms around her, but he didn’t think she would let him, right now. “I need to talk to you, Sweetheart. Could you come and sit down, please?”
She nodded her head, unable to speak for fear she’d ask him if he was finally going to send her away. If he hadn’t thought of that yet, she certainly didn’t want to put the thought in his head, but she had no idea what else it could be. She had never seen him like this, except for in the bedroom. She turned to walk around him, still avoiding eye contact, and took a seat, laying her hands in her lap and lowering her gaze to the floor, not saying a word.
He sighed, pulling a chair out so he could sit facing her. All he wanted to do was take her in his arms and hold her close, but he knew he had a lot to make up for first. “First things first. If you have already moved your things, I want you to move them back to our room.”
“What?” she gasped, finally looking up at him. “Now, you’re resorting to cruel jokes” I know you don’t want me now that I’m pregnant. The least you could do, is pretend I’m not even here, instead of tormenting me with the one thing you know I want.”
Tobias slid off his chair to kneel before her. “It’s not a joke, Sweetheart. I don’t want you all the way down the hall from me. I need you close while you sleep, so I can keep you safe.”
“You must have realized I am in love with you,” she stammered, so emotionally distraught she couldn’t even feel embarrassment at her own words. “This is…”
His Unexpected Mail-Order Bride (Historical Sapphire Springs Book 1) Page 10