What was it with women using me?
At least with Izzy it had only cost a bit of pride, not a molar.
Penelopee wasn’t finished with her tirade. “Every year, until last year, I’d bought a brand-new set of teeth. Teeth plated in gold. Teeth made of the strongest steel. Teeth promised to be perfect. Teeth guaranteed to last forever.” She shook her head. “But they never did. When Arnold had his little ‘accident’ . . .” She gave a small laugh.
My eyebrow arched. “Little” didn’t quite describe forty-five busted bones and internal organ damage, but I let her have her way. For now.
“I saw an opportunity and I grabbed it.”
I snorted. “You ripped out his teeth.”
“Yes, like I said, opportunity.” She blew out a long breath. “Please pay attention, Blue. I expect better from my employees.”
“I don’t work for . . .”
Her own eyebrow arched.
“Forget it.”
“As I was saying, Arnold’s ‘accident’ was like a gift from the tooth gods.” A smile lifted the corner of her lips. “I pulled his teeth and had my dentist fit them into a new pair of dentures.”
“But he was a fairy,” I said. At her puzzled look, I added, “Small teeth.”
“Right.” She tapped a finger to her temple. “His teeth were much too small. That’s why I had to try again.”
I rolled my eyes. “With another Tooth Fairy?”
Apparently, the princess wasn’t all that bright either. She smiled, nodding. “I knew you’d understand. But no matter how many times I tried, the fairies’ teeth were always too small.”
“Go figure.” I looked into her eyes. “That wasn’t the only reason you went after Tooth Fairies, was it? You wanted revenge for what Arnold did. For what the Fairy Council let him do. This isn’t about teeth. It’s about destroying all fairies.”
She ignored my comment, acting as if I hadn’t spoken. “Then there was Barry. I had to kill him after I lost a piece of my disguise. I couldn’t have him tell you the names of everyone who’d bought green wings, now could I?”
Before I could answer, she rushed on. “He had such a nice smile.... I just couldn’t help myself. . . . Sadly, his were a little too big; made me look like a horse. . . .”
“A shame. Really.”
Her eyes locked on my mouth. “Fear not, Blue, my next pair will fit just right.”
CHAPTER 63
A few seconds after making her threat, Penelopee tore another piece of electrical tape off the roll on the desk, smoothing it over my bloody lips again.
I tried to duck away, but it was no use. My mouth was once again sealed. I had to find a way to free myself before I ended up gumming three meals a day.
When a knock sounded on my office door, my gumming concerns became the least of my worries. The scent of fairy dust drifted from beneath the door. My heart jumped in my chest, pounding at triple speed. “Maaannnnaaaaa,” I screamed behind the electrical tape.
“Blue?” Izzy called. “I got your message.”
I kicked at the floor, hoping to warn her of the danger, but my boots barely made a sound. I pulled hard at the floss around my hands. It dug in, slicing my wrists until they were slick with blood.
“Blue? Are you here?” Izzy called again. “I’m coming in.”
I screamed louder, but no sound passed the tape.
Penelopee stood behind me, her hands hovering on each side of my shoulders, the magic pea in one hand and a pair of bloody pliers in the other.
The door swung forward.
CHAPTER 64
Izzy stood in my office doorway, her hair the color of raining fire. She looked beautiful but tired, with deep circles beneath her eyes. Those circles grew wider as her gaze danced from me to Penelopee and then to Jonas, who still sat behind my desk, his face blank. “Jonas? Penelopee? What’s going on?” She frowned. “Blue, if this is some sort of sick sex game . . .”
The princess ignored Izzy’s question and waved her into the office. “We’ve been waiting for you.”
Smart-ass that she was, Izzy took in my bloody face and the pliers in Penelopee’s hands and then said, “I’m not a prude or anything, but—”
“Get in here,” Penelopee snapped. “Close the door behind you. We don’t want any interruptions.”
I strained against the tape, shaking my head, but as always Izzy disregarded my advice and entered the room, though tentatively. Her stubbornness would be the death of her, probably sooner rather than later by the dire looks of our current circumstances.
Penelopee moved around me, slipping behind Izzy, effectively cutting off any means of escape unless Izzy pulled a Humpty Dumpty through the window. The princess opened the palm of her hand to show off the pea. The once shiny vegetable looked drab, as if all of the shine had been eaten away by stomach acid—which it had been, but I wasn’t going to be the one to share that news with Isabella. I doubt she’d see the humor.
Izzy licked her lips. “What exactly is going on here?”
Penelopee let out a loud laugh that cracked through the small room like a gunshot. “I’m so glad you asked.” She waved the pea in front of Izzy, back and forth, until the pink-winged fairy’s eyes grew distant and foggy.
Which, much to my surprise, didn’t take all that long. I’d expected longer from Izzy, given her half-human blood; at the very least a squeak of protest, not straight-up drooling idiot like Jonas.
A smile curved over Penelopee’s mouth. “Isabella,” she said, “take these.”
Izzy held out her hands, grasping the bloody pliers Penelopee had handed her in her thin, pale fingers. They gleamed with malevolent intent, or so it seemed to me. But I might’ve been projecting. Losing a molar and a pint of blood did that to a guy.
“Good girl,” Penelopee said, focused on Izzy’s blank gaze. “Now rip out every one of his teeth.”
Not even pausing, Izzy turned to me, her face as empty as Old Mother Hubbard’s cupboard. Gone was the fiery stubbornness in her gaze, along with any and all recognition of yours truly. Without flinching, she grabbed the end of the electrical tape across my mouth, ripping it free.
I yelped as a few more layers of lip flesh went along with the tape. “Izzy,” I yelled, trying to break through the pea-induced thrall holding her. “Wake up.”
Her hand, the one with the pliers, rose above my head. My blood dribbled down the end and onto her hand, but she didn’t appear to notice.
“Izzy!” I screamed again. “No!”
She paused, her fingers inches from my mouth.
I took a relieved breath.
A mistake, since her brief hesitation had nothing to do with my plight but rather a logistical issue. Namely, where to start with her teeth-ripping. Back or front. Right or left. Uppers or lowers. So many possibilities.
A few seconds later, my mouth full of rusty-tasting pliers, I begged Izzy one last time to return to her senses. Because if she didn’t, who knew what would happen to either of us.
Izzy wrapped the ends of the pliers around my front teeth, pulling back long enough to stare into my eyes.
Sweat pooled on my lower back.
And then she winked.
CHAPTER 65
Was my mind playing tricks on me? Or had Izzy just winked at me? My eyes narrowed on hers, but only my grim reflection appeared in their blackness. The pliers tightened, pushing into my already swollen bloody gums.
I yanked against the floss around my wrist, terrified not only of the thought of losing thirty-two of my best electric-white features but of what would happen to the Tooth Fairy standing over me if Penelopee had her way and strung me up like a blue-haired piñata.
When Izzy didn’t rip my front tooth free as fast as Penelopee liked, the princess stepped forward, her eyes locked on my bloody mouth.
“Do it. Now,” she yelled, moving to stand directly behind Izzy. She watched over Izzy’s shoulder, her hot breath on my cheeks. I closed my eyes against the onslaught of less-than-fresh
princess breath and Izzy’s dead-eyed gaze.
This was it.
My luck had finally changed.
But not quite in the way I’d expected.
In the blink of an eye—my eye, to be more precise—Izzy spun around, knocking me in the jaw with her wings. I flew back, crashing against the wall, chair and all. The chair splintered under the assault, freeing my hands from their flossy bounds.
I leaped to my feet, ready to smite Penelopee.
But I was too late.
She lay on the floor at Izzy’s feet, a large and still growing pliers-shaped welt rising on her forehead. I glanced from Izzy to the downed princess. “Nice shot.”
The fairy shrugged. “I played a little fairyball as a kid.” She bent down, checking the princess for a pulse, and then shook her head.
“She’s dead?” I asked, not particularly caring either way. She had killed eight fairies and one Barry. Not to mention ripping out my back molar without hesitation.
Izzy sighed, wiping her hands on her jeans as she rose to her feet. “Nope.”
“Too bad.”
She grinned. “Lovers’ quarrel?”
“Funny,” I said, rolling my eyes. “You know she was the one who attacked you in your apartment?”
She glanced down at the still unconscious princess. “I had a feeling. Any idea why?”
My eyes narrowed. “You don’t know?”
“Would I have asked if I did?”
Smart-ass. “She wanted your teeth,” I said, as if that explained everything. And, in a way, it did. Just not to anyone with an ounce of logic. “Apparently, Penelopee couldn’t find the right fit.” I motioned to the denture container on the desk.
Izzy slowly stepped over the downed princess, making her way to the desk. She lifted the lid and grimaced. “Half of these are baby teeth.”
I shook my head. “Not baby. Fairy teeth.”
“She killed all those fairies for their teeth?” Her forehead wrinkled. “Why?”
“Besides being absolutely bonkers?” I asked with a grin. “Does her motive really matter?” Izzy would figure out the connection to her father soon enough. How she’d feel about it I had no idea, but one thing was clear: Izzy had avenged her father’s murder.
“I guess not.”
To take her mind off the topic, I knelt down, plucking the pea from Penelopee’s palm. The princess’s body bounced from the contact. “What’s with the pea?” I held it up, rolling it around my fingers. Had I somehow broken the damn thing when I’d swallowed it? “Why did it work on Jonas but not you?”
“Yet another perk of being the Tooth Fairy, I guess.”
“Perk, huh?” I frowned. “Was one of these perks trying to have me killed?”
“Are we back to that again?” She blew out a harsh breath. “Fine. I’m sorry I lied to you.”
I snorted. “That’s it?”
“What more do you want?”
“How about,” my voice rose to a girlish screech, “a ‘Gee, Blue, sorry for trying to have you killed’?”
Her mouth curved into a deep frown. “I do not sound like that.”
“But you admit to wanting me dead?”
She shook her head. “It wasn’t like that.”
“Right.”
“Stop it,” Jonas shouted from his seat behind my desk. “Isabella saved your life. If not for her feelings for you, the Council would’ve had you killed once you did as they wanted and found where Arnold had hidden the pea.”
CHAPTER 66
My eyes locked on Izzy’s face. “Is that true? Do you have . . . um . . . feelings for me?” The very thought left me slightly dazed and itchy. But not in a bad way.
“No.” She bit her lip. “I don’t even like you, let alone have a single warm feeling for the blue hairs on your chinny chin chin.”
I raised an eyebrow.
“I would’ve killed you. Just like that.” She snapped her fingers. “But we needed you alive . . . to get the pea . . . no matter what the Council said. It was the best way. The only way . . .”
I frowned. “. . . to restore your family’s good name by bringing back the pea Arnold stole. That was why you kept the Council from killing me.”
Her gaze darted to Jonas and then back to me as a splash of color heated her cheeks. When she spoke it was in a low whisper. “I had to clear my father’s name. He deserved as much; after all, he’d given up everything, including my mother and me, for his fairy brethren.” I thought of the paintings in the storage locker where Arnold had hidden the pea. His prized possessions. “He never planned on keeping the pea. He told Clayton and Peyton that he was worried about it, worried someone would try to use it against the Shadows, causing another war. He just wanted to make sure it was safe.” She glared down at the princess. “Penelopee must’ve caught him before he had a chance to tell the Council where he’d put it.”
“What does any of that have to do with you and me? Why didn’t you search for the pea yourself? Why get involved with me?”
“There is no you and me, Blue. You made that clear when you slept with her.” Again Izzy’s gaze returned to the princess on the floor.
“I didn’t . . .” At least I was pretty sure Penelopee and I hadn’t done the horizontal electric slide. Not that I could remember a damn thing about that night. She must’ve drugged my whiskey.
“It doesn’t matter.” Her thin lips said it did, more than she wanted. “What I did, all of it, was to keep you alive to find the pea and save the fairies.”
My chest started to burn, but not with my typical electrical current. “You’re lying.”
She ducked her head. “When the Council put the hit out on you, I was worried we might never find the pea, so I had to act.”
“By act,” I paused, “you mean stop the fairies from outright murdering me.”
She shrugged. “You say pea, I say pea pod.”
“Right.” I took a step away, needing to distance myself from her, from her cold, clinical talk of my murder.
“The twins and I came up with the idea of protecting you until you found the pea.”
“By acting like a damsel in distress.”
She shrugged. “You expected me to be weak, to need you, so I used your assumption to get what I wanted.”
“But you were distressed. Penelopee as Jack the Tooth Ripper had already tried to kill you once. It was only a matter of time until she tried again.”
Izzy laughed. “I can take care of myself, Blue. I didn’t need you or anyone else to protect me.” She paused, a smile lifting the ends of her lips. “Can’t say the same for you, though.”
I crossed my arms over my chest. “Is that so? If I remember correctly—and I do, by the way—I was the one saving you last night.” I leaned down until our lips were inches apart. “From your ex-lover and his plot to wipe out all of Fairyland. Not that you bothered to mention being engaged to your archenemy.”
She snorted. “You wish.”
“Excuse me?”
“I had everything under control last night.”
A smile spread over my face. “Is that so?”
“I had Damien exactly where I wanted him.”
“Uh-huh.”
“Fine,” she said, smacking her palm into my chest. Blue sparks shot between us, but she didn’t move away. “We’re even then.”
“Not quite.” I held out the magic pea. When she didn’t move to take it from my hand, I pushed it toward her. “Go ahead. Take it. It’s what you came here for.”
She still didn’t move.
Jonas wasn’t as hesitant. He leaped from his place behind my desk, snatched the pea from my hand, letting out a yelp as he shocked himself, and then ran out the door. The pitter-patter of his tiny retreating boots were the only sound in the room. Izzy and I watched as he ran and then turned to face each other. Silence filled the air between us.
Finally, when I couldn’t take it anymore, I said, “Guess I’m out of a job. Serial killer’s caught. You’re no longer
in danger. And the pea is safely with the fairies.” I motioned to the open doorway and the scurrying of fairy feet down the hall. Damien was still on the loose, but I would find him. And then I would make sure he paid for what he’d done.
“That makes two of us,” she said.
I tilted my head in question.
“I turned in my floss this morning.”
My eyebrow rose. “You quit being the Tooth Fairy? How is that possible?”
“I never wanted the job, Blue.” Her eyes met mine imploringly. “I wasn’t lying about that. I only agreed to save your ass.” She frowned, as if regretting her decision. “After the fairies sent Henrick to kill you, I knew I had to do something other than keep you distracted from finding the pea. The only way the fairies would listen to me and not chop you up into blue bite-sized pieces was if I held the highest power.”
“Wait,” I said, holding up my hand. “Henrick came to my apartment to kill me?”
“But your little girlfriend there,” her finger pointed to the downed princess, “got to him first.” She laughed. “I guess you owe her your life. Of course since she was inside the apartment to kill me, I don’t plan on thanking her anytime soon.”
I stood, staring at Izzy, trying to take it all in. So many times I could’ve lost her. And now she was simply going to walk out of my life. As much as I wanted to stop her, I knew she deserved better than all of this. She belonged in a world without serial killers, sadistic fairies, and blue PIs. A world where things made sense. A world where murderous princesses didn’t rip out your teeth for revenge and a new set of dentures. A safe world.
“So what now?” I asked with a small smile. “Do you go back to your former life, minus the ex-fiancé? A nine-to-five life working for the man?”
She tapped her finger to her lip. “Kind of. But I’ll be working with, not for, only one man.”
“One—”
“A blue-haired man.”
“What?”
“Partners?” She held out her hand. When I didn’t take it soon enough, she snatched my hand in hers. “Until death do we part.”
I nodded slowly, shocking both of us literally and figuratively. “Partners,” I repeated.
The Fairyland Murders Page 21