by Teegan Loy
I was pulled out of my heavy thoughts when we walked into the bar and loud music filled my ears, making my chest vibrate. The dance floor was filled with guys grinding against each other. Some were kissing and touching intimately, while others were laughing and bumping to the beat of the music.
Skye guided me to a darkened corner away from the dance floor. As we wove through the bar patrons, I couldn’t help but stare at the wide variety of people, from flamboyant to reserved. Some I couldn’t even venture a guess what they were trying to portray.
Skye nudged me as he pulled out a chair for me to sit. My eyes widened when I noticed he was clutching my forearm, exposed for everyone around us to see.
“This is insane,” he whispered.
I managed to nod before I took a closer look at the people. At the table nearest were two guys dressed in button-up shirts and dark pants. They looked like they had just come from work and stopped for a nightcap. I tried not to stare, but I’d never really seen two gay men interact with each other and it fascinated the shit out of me.
They sat close, talking softly to one another. The blond reached across the table, clasping the other man’s hand, entwining their fingers. He leaned forward and gently pressed his lips against the other man’s mouth. It was intrusive for me to stare, but I couldn’t look away. I wanted to know about them, how they had made it to this point in their lives where holding hands and kissing each other seemed to be a natural part of their existence.
I was so enthralled with them I didn’t even notice Skye leave and come back with two drinks.
“Tyler? Hello.” He snapped his fingers in front of my face.
“Sorry,” I said, feeling my face flush when his fingers drifted across my cheek.
“You okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
The blond I’d been watching caught my eye and smiled. I nodded back at him, and Skye immediately grabbed my hand.
“Baby, you need to relax,” Skye said.
“Right.”
“Is this your first time?” the guy with brown hair, wearing the blue dress shirt asked.
“Um?” I looked at Skye.
“Yeah, we’re not from here. Our town doesn’t have a bar like this,” Skye said.
“My name is Pete and this is Mario.” Pete nudged Mario. “Remember our first time?”
Mario laughed. “So young and so in love.”
I almost spit my drink out. Skye chuckled and slapped me on the back. Mario and Pete moved their chairs to our table. It was amazing to listen to them describe their lives, and it also made me incredibly happy to know that in the real world, guys like Mario and Pete existed.
Skye and Pete excused themselves and headed for the bar to get more drinks. Mario looked at me and smiled. “He doesn’t know how much you love him, does he?”
I cleared my throat. “It’s not like that with us.”
“Is he your first lover?” Mario asked.
“Uh, I guess.”
“It’s okay. I was freaked the first time I went out in public too. I know this is new. I was you once, and he was so beautiful. I loved him with all of my heart, but we were young and stupid.”
“What happened?” I asked. I didn’t really know if I wanted an answer.
“It’s a long story, but essentially, he wouldn’t acknowledge our relationship, and I couldn’t take the secrets. In the end, I wasn’t important enough to him. He didn’t want me. God, that’s just depressing.”
“Why are you telling me this?”
“I’m not really sure. You sort of remind me of the way I acted with my first lover.”
“Quit saying that,” I muttered.
“Don’t like the L word, huh.”
I shrugged and drained my drink. I was grateful when I felt Skye’s hand on my shoulder. “Want to dance?” he whispered.
“Really?”
“Everyone else is doing it.”
Skye pulled me to my feet. Mario caught my eye and smiled, but he looked so sad, it made my stomach roll.
Once we got to the dance floor, I stood still, staring at Skye.
“How do we do this?” I asked.
“I don’t think it really matters.” He chuckled and waved his hand at the different dancers. Some were pasted against each other, some were going with the beat of the music, and others were just groping each other and simulating sex. At least I thought they were faking it, but when one guy near us, groaned loudly, I suspected not everyone was.
“Let’s do it our own way,” Skye said.
He ignored the beat of the music and slid his hand around the nape of my neck. He tugged on my hair, making me lift my chin so I was staring into his beautiful eyes. His kiss was tentative at first but slowly intensified. My head spun, and when he opened his mouth and touched his tongue to mine, I lost all of my insecurities.
Suddenly I wanted to leave.
“I want you,” he whispered in my ear.
I froze as the insecurities flooded my belly. I knew what he meant and it scared the shit out of me. It wasn’t that I was afraid of the physical act. I’d heard the first time hurt, but I was more frightened of giving up so much control to him.
The beat of the music grew harder, and soon we weren’t really dancing. Instead, I felt he was fucking me through my clothing.
“I gotta piss,” I muttered as I stepped away from him.
I raced down the hall where there had to be more oxygen. It took a few minutes before I gathered myself enough to stop my heart from pounding in my ears. I found Skye leaning against our table, sipping his beer. When he spotted me, he flashed a grin, and I couldn’t stop the swoop in my stomach when I looked at his messy hair and flushed cheeks.
“Hi,” he said.
I stepped into his space and wound my arms around his waist, pulling him close to me.
“I’m yours,” I whispered against his lips.
He gasped into my mouth and stilled. The lust shining in his darkened eyes told me he’d figured out what I meant. He fisted my T-shirt, crooked his finger through my belt loop, and roughly jerked me against his body. He jammed his thigh between my legs and undulated his hips, waking up my dick.
I arched my back and started grinding against him. I wasn’t sure how many songs played before the stimulation became too much. I didn’t want to be here anymore. A bed in our hotel room was waiting for us.
“Fuck, Skye, stop. I’m going to come in my pants.”
He stepped back, gripping my biceps, and gave me a slightly quizzical look. “Anything for you,” he whispered.
I swear every bit of blood in my entire body was now in my rock-hard cock. Skye gripped my hand and dragged me through the crowd of writhing, sweaty guys. He had his phone out, viciously jabbing at the screen. He growled at the person on the phone before jamming it back into his pocket.
“Fifteen fucking minutes,” he snapped and roughly slammed me against the wall. I grunted when he crushed into me, yanking my shirt out of my pants and slipping his hands under the fabric. He traced my ribs as he made his way up to my nipples.
The second he touched me, I bit down on his shoulder. That fucking car better get here soon or I was going to shove my hands down his pants in the entryway of the bar. He smashed his lips against mine and dug his teeth into my bottom lip, almost drawing blood.
The outside door opened, blasting us with chilly air. It settled me down.
“Did someone order a car?” the doorman asked.
Skye nodded and shoved past the guy. I pressed my palm against my dick, trying to shift it into a more comfortable position. Skye flung open the door of the cab and pushed me into the back of the stale smelling vehicle. The back of my head banged against the seat when he attacked me. I couldn’t even think enough to be embarrassed.
The next thing I knew, Skye was tossing bills at the driver and pushing me out the door. We sprinted through the hotel lobby toward the elevator and poked at the button. We stood for about three seconds before Skye was heading for
the stairwell.
“Can’t wait,” Skye groaned into my ear.
We bounded up the stairs, pausing at every floor to kiss or grab each other. When we reached our floor, I thought I was going to explode. The need to feel his skin against mine was overloading my senses and fogging my brain.
Coherent thoughts were impossible as Skye shoved the keycard into the slot, flinging the door open. My shirt was the first casualty when he tore it from my shoulders, ripping the collar. Things didn’t slow down until we were totally naked.
He shoved me on the bed, dropped to his knees, and engulfed my dick in his mouth.
“Holy shit,” I shouted.
He snickered and set a slow, torturous pace, making me feel like I was going to explode into a million pieces.
“C’mon, I’m almost there,” I said.
I thought he was going to finish me off, but he grinned around my dick and let it fall from his mouth. I wanted to cry, to beg him to end it, but he had other ideas.
“Skye,” I whined, but then I felt him massaging my ass. He dragged his finger down my crack and I shivered when he came to my hole. The bottoming thing still made me uneasy, but I wanted to give it a shot.
He circled his finger, pressing harder with each pass until he breached me. He groaned and bit my shoulder, sending pain and pleasure rocketing through my body.
“Okay?” he asked.
“Yeah,” I breathed.
He reached across me and came up with a small bottle of lube. I had no idea where he’d been hiding it. The slickness made things easier as he started sliding his finger in and out of me. It felt odd. Not bad, just different.
He pushed in deeper and I forced myself to breathe through the pain, but then he hit my prostate and it made me buck my hips and shout. He hit it again and a bright white light flashed in front of my eyes.
“Fuck, I’m ready,” I said, grabbing my cock and squeezing.
Skye pulled his fingers out and I felt empty. He ripped open a condom and paused for a few seconds.
“What’s wrong?” I asked, almost panicking.
“Trying not to come,” he said through gritted teeth.
He took a deep breath and begged me to turn over, saying it would be easier if I were on my stomach. I rolled over, rose on my knees, and glanced over my shoulder. His face was bright red, and he was gripping his cock so tightly it almost looked painful. He poured more lube into his hand and made sure everything was nice and slick.
I winced when the cold lube hit my hole, but then there was something much larger than a finger trying to gain entrance.
“Calm down, Tyler. I promise I won’t hurt you. I’ll stop if you don’t like it,” he said.
I sighed and dropped my chin to my chest. Even with the knowledge that we weren’t going to be forever, I trusted him not to cause me physical pain.
“Do it,” I said.
The moment he penetrated me, he grunted and swore.
“Oh, god,” I gasped as he pushed in further. It burned and felt weird. I wiggled my hips in hopes that it would help me loosen further.
“Tell me if it hurts,” he squeaked.
“It’s fine.” I slapped at his arm. “Just . . .”
He pushed harder, and by dumb luck, he grazed my prostate and everything went fuzzy. The pain was still there, but it was tolerable.
“Skye.” I arched my back into the burn.
He babbled words that didn’t make any sense. I almost thought I heard him say something about love, but it had to be wishful thinking on my part. But nothing lasts forever and my orgasm was building quickly. When I got my hand on my dick, things were over before the fat lady finished her song. Skye didn’t last much longer.
We were down to our last few hours together and my stomach was in knots. Skye’s dad invited us to breakfast, but we decided to spend the morning together. He used the excuse of going over the playbook before the rest of the team arrived. We hadn’t mentioned the game the entire morning. We both knew once we stepped out of the room, I couldn’t touch him or even look at him.
We snuck out before housekeeping came in to clean the room. It stunk of sweat and sex and needed to be sanitized. Plus, we knew the moment Gavin arrived in town he’d be looking for us.
Things were neat and tidy when we returned.
As the seconds drained away, I sat on the bed, trying not to think of what was going to happen. Skye sat beside to me, and I let my head fall on his shoulder. He put his arm around me, squeezing tightly. I buried my nose in his neck and inhaled, memorizing his smell and wondering when I was going to get to touch him again.
Gavin’s booming voice echoed down the hall and I started to untangle from Skye, but he grabbed my cheeks and pressed his lips to mine.
“Open up, girls,” Gavin shouted as he banged on the door.
Skye ignored him and shoved his tongue into my mouth. I punched him in the side and we both fell off the bed.
“Fucking let me in, you shitheads,” Gavin shouted.
“Skye,” I grunted. “He’s not going to go away.”
He rolled off me, ran his fingers through his hair, and calmly went to answer the door. I stayed on the floor.
“Hold your fucking dick, V,” Skye said.
He took one more look at me before he opened the door. The moment Gavin pushed his way into the room, things changed.
“Holy shit, Ty? Is your back okay?”
“Oh, yeah. Just a precaution,” I said and sat up.
Gavin filled us in on the bus ride and what we’d missed at school.
“I saw Brooke downstairs with your mom,” Gavin said. “And Lindy is with Ashley.”
Skye visibly flinched, and I rolled onto my stomach, ignoring Gavin’s jabs about how stupid we were to let those ladies get away. When I didn’t respond, Gavin nudged me with his foot. I sighed and stood.
“You sure you’re okay? You look really pale,” Gavin said.
“I’m fine, buddy. Maybe a little case of nerves, but nothing to worry about.”
“Since when do you get nervous?”
“Since this is the championship game and probably the final time I’ll step on a football field in uniform,” I said.
“What the fuck, man? I thought for sure you’d play in college. I’ve heard rumors about U of M, Michigan State, and Ohio State coming to scout this game. It’s a great opportunity.”
“I’m not sure if I want to continue to play. I’d like to be able to use my brain and my body when I’m older, and playing football seems to go against self-preservation.”
“A scholarship would be nice,” Gavin said wistfully.
I didn’t think Gavin had anything to worry about when it came to football and college. Those scouts were probably coming to look at him and they were going to get an eyeful.
Skye snorted and stalked around the room. “You both know the moment I step onto the field, all eyes will be on me. No one will even notice either of you.”
He flicked my ear and kicked Gavin, which turned into a wrestling match between the three of us. Laughing and out of breath, we leaned back against the bed and grinned at each other.
“You both know those scouts will be watching. Maybe they’ll recruit you as a pair. You’re kind of a match made in heaven.”
Even knowing Gavin meant on the football field, my face went hot and I choked, coughing and gasping for air.
“Team meeting in fifteen,” Gavin said.
“Give me a second,” I said as I stumbled into the bathroom. Hanging around Skye and hiding my emotions was going to be a pain in the ass. The guy in the mirror thought I was insane, but I straightened my back and transformed into the star quarterback of Middleton Lake High who was happy and well-adjusted.
I opened the door and almost ran into Skye. I’d hoped he’d left with Gavin. It would be much easier to walk into the team meeting without Skye by my side.
“Where’s Gavin?” I asked.
“I told him we’d meet him downstairs.”
> I sat on the bed and waited for the ceiling to crash down on my head. He took a seat next to me and leaned against my side but didn’t say a word. I wanted to ask what was going on inside his head, but I was too chicken.
“Ty.”
I turned to face him. He immediately closed his eyes and rested his forehead against mine. My heart pounded in my ears as I fought to keep all my emotions in check.
He leaned closer and brought his hand to my cheek. I held my breath and allowed him to gently kiss me. For a few moments, I let myself to just feel him.
Before I fell apart, I broke the kiss. “We’re going to be late.”
He nodded and stood, heading to the door. I sighed and followed.
My heart felt like it snapped in two.
Chapter Ten
The winter months came and turned the city of Middleton Lake completely white and cold. The only bright spot was the time I spent with Skye. People accepted the fact that Skye and Brooke had broken up. She seemed to have moved on with Thomas Crow, of all people. Lindy still wouldn’t talk to me.
Skye hung out at my house a lot, staying over or having dinner with us almost daily. He said his dad worked a lot and his mother had gone out of the country. He didn’t like being alone all the time. Ashley told me his parents were headed toward a divorce.
He invited my mom to watch him play the piano at several recitals and competitions. He was immersing himself into my life and it was making me incredibly uneasy.
Things were still weird between us. Under the dark of night, we acted like boyfriends, but when the light of day hit, we were only friends. And we never talked about it. I knew we should, but I didn’t want to upset him. Today was the only time that mattered. I didn’t want to think about tomorrow.
As graduation neared, Skye’s mood darkened, and the only time he seemed relaxed was at my house hidden away in the basement or out in our backyard.