by K.N. Lee
Judge Jorgensen looked at both the Defense and Crown. “Both of you did an amazing job and I can tell by Faye-Minita’s face, she’s a bit confused at my verdict. Keep in mind, everyone deserves a second chance, people do change and you, Faye-Minita, should know that better than anyone else in this courtroom”. I look over to find Cameron glancing at me, wondering what the judge meant by that comment.
I was covered in a cloud of confusion, as I frantically began to search my brain cloud, as to how the Judge knew about my past.
Then it strangely occurred to me, Jorgensen was once a law student sitting in the back row of my own court case; the case that changed my whole life.
We got dismissed and I nervously went to grab my belongings. I said a curt goodbye to Cameron and turned around to the exit door.
"It's the same court room?" I rhetorically asked myself, shaking my head in disbelief.
11 Years Ago
I had pleaded innocent to the charges against me, but the medical examination had proven otherwise. Hard drugs were found in my system and I was charged with illegal drinking and usage of drugs and other named damages I couldn't fathom. I was ordered to go for social work for a year and transferred to a rehabilitation home.
I looked around the courtroom, with the legal students drilling holes inside of me and nodding in contempt. I felt like I was the only one occupying the large space. I simpered at the thought of my friends, they still didn't show up, only Drayton did and I was indeed surprised and dissatisfied.
I was escorted out by the policemen and on my way out, the press stormed before me, flashing lights across my face and hurling me as I bent my head to avoid the blinding lights.
"Faye, I hope you don’t mind coming to the cafe to celebrate this big success”, Sheila said, as she held my hand. The excitement was too obvious to not notice on her face.
"It sounds tempting, but I have to rush home right now. You know I wouldn't bail on this celebration if it wasn't for something important”. I looked straight into her blue, innocent eyes, apologetically and hugged her.
I checked my wristwatch absentmindedly, as I switched on the engine of my car. Alison would surely be mad at me, she had told me about her prior appointment but I had coerced her into babysitting Bastian.
The sent mail was another reason why going home that instant wasn't an option anymore.
2
Moving around in my king-sized bed, struggling while covered in sweats with my covers tossing sideways as my body jostled together with it. Somehow I could feel Bastian stirring from the other angle of the bed in discomfort. At least, he was lucky; he had no idea what it felt like to go through what I felt every night.
I started to mumble “Nonstop” in an inaudible voice, so faintly the sound of a needle dropped would still echo.
I turned over to my side, dissatisfied, stress lines forming on my forehead like I was trying to decipher what it was I was feeling and seeing.
My eyes rolled under my eyelids, which were shut tight.
My light blue tank top was now a darker shade from the sweat that poured from my body.
I was running – running from something I had no idea about. This was a nightmare, my subconscious self-whispered.
It was dark wherever I was and I was alone, the place had lost its purpose and I was not in the position to lend it to anyone. I cowered in fear as I saw myself in an estranged place, no chirping birds, no growling animals, just silence, absolute silence.
Wrapped in apprehension, that any step I took would attract the dangers in hiding, I tiptoed gently, shading my eyes against the rough branches, making sure not to rustle the leaves, then summoned every courage I had left in me to increase my stride.
I continued to run, even when I did not know whom I was running from or why I was running. All that registered was I needed to get away from this hellhole, and I needed to do so quickly.
I kept moving, not considering the essence of looking before leaping. I turned sharply around my waist when I tripped on a broken branch, falling flat on my face. "Not again!” I whimpered.
As I gathered optimum composure to get myself back up, I suddenly had an unshakable feeling of deja vu. “Why do I feel I have felt this and seen this?” I asked myself, touching my temple, apparent that I was burning up and nonchalant of my physical self.
I turned around slowly to hear the muffled cries of a dying deer, something strange was bent over its stomach and I could hear flesh being torn apart, it was merciless.
I began to back up nice and slow, as I landed my legs over each other, trying not to breathe to avoid any sound coming out.
As I backed up slowly in extreme veneration of the creature, I remembered to look back to see if anything was in my path. I luckily turned around in time but unnecessary anyway because there was nowhere else for me to run to. Behind me was a ledge, which only led its way down deep into a dark abyss, and before me, laid the dark beast, a dilemma I had to make a decision quickly or I would be forced to face my doom.
I faltered, confusion and terror taking over me, hesitant on the next step to take as darkness engrossed my sight, my face twisted like I had taken vinegar.
I slid my hand into the ragged mess of my hair; I had no way of seeing a way out of this dark, dreary forest. I was trapped with a beast.
I heard a clap that echoed throughout the place as I stared in terror into the darkness before me. I turned away to see a shadow of the dark figure. I could not really make out what the figure was, since I squinted my eyes so much, the only things I could come up with was that It stood on its hind legs, it had a large frightful face, a rare large tail that perceived like a dinosaur, with fearful eyes that glowed like fire, blinding my sight.
I saw something on the beast, in resemblance to a cape, that surrounded its neck, clothing it's dark figure and hiding away its entirety, unable to decode its real nature.
I spoke as lightly as I could mutter out, trembling under my low voice, “Hello? Hello, if you can hear me, I need help!” I shrieked, treading softly on the rustled leaves. “There’s something there!” I continued panicking.
I then pointed towards the direction of the shape devouring the deer. The figure stopped eating its meal and walked towards me, deterring its visibility and taking slow and heavy strides towards me. It then stood directly across the other figure I was trying to communicate with, having a kind of strange bond that confused me even more, as my eyes adjusted to both figures, letting me have my peace at that instant as they both walked away slowly.
They stopped abruptly when they got to a far distance, turning back in the same accord as they merged together in one body, turning towards me in a stronger and larger body and charging towards me, as they now gained wings.
I shrilled in a deafening voice, unable to hear myself anymore, too petrified and too tired to run on my heels, voices like run, hide, move all mumbled in my head, but all attempts to use one of them were futile, it was like I had toxins in my system, I couldn't communicate with my head.
I begged for the figure not to approach me, but it would not listen. It kept making its way closer and closer, with me fading away from myself.
It stood inches before me and for a moment, I thought it heard me beseech him until it fiercely gripped me by the arm and jostled me into his, a free hand from his large wings grabbing a fistful hold of my hair.
A buzzing sound started in my ears causing me to lose all senses and footing, as I started to descend into the darkness. I had taken a step backwards off of the ledge, tried to let out one final scream, but realized I could not. I was fatigued beyond my own comprehension, my eyes turned blurry and my knees went soft, it could have had a feeling of a jellyfish. I could not move at all.
My eyes opened wide and it took me a few minutes to realize I was experiencing sleep apnea. My body remained numb by all means and every trial to bring it to life was all in vain.
I tried to scream, but nothing came out. All I could do is move my eyes slowly and my
fingers, even slower.
It was a horrible and traumatic feeling.
I managed to look downwards in the direction where Bastian would lay but he was nowhere to be found. I could not move my head, but I tried my best and managed to move it inch by inch, I turned my head to the right-hand side and my eyes got bigger at the instant. The closet door sprung open and all I was able to see were two bulging eyes glaring at me from within the darkness. A tear rolled down my left eye, as I was trapped in my own body with nothing I could do. It was like a shackle surrounded me or like an enchantment from the highest priest of darkness, preparing my sacrifice and with no way of waking up from the living nightmare.
Suddenly, I felt great pressure on my chest and immediately looked up to see Bastian wagging his tail happily at me, and licking a part of my body. He then stopped bluntly, growling at me. A squeak of surprise left my lips, his face inched close to mine and he bared his teeth at me and began barking. Frankly, I tried to get away from him, only to be yanked up, that harsh movement tore a bit of my skin then I locked eyes with him. My blood suddenly went cold, Bastian towered over me by nearly a foot and his fluffy, close to perfection features could have taken my breath away – if fear hadn't done that already.
I could notice his demeanor, recognition not part of it, as I narrowed my eyes to watch my Bastian closely. His piercing blue eyes lacking emotion, opening his mouth when he saw me breathing heavily. A gasp left my lips when it dawned on me that this creature on me could be somebody else, maybe the shadow in the midst of the darkness that flung the door open. I fidgeted, it was someone else, I concluded.
Brusquely, a voice echoed from my closet “Come here. Come to me”. The closet door swung shut and suddenly with a huge gasp, I sat up in my bed, the sound of the voice tearing me away from any dead thoughts. I jerked forward, adrenaline almost pushing me away from my queen-sized bed.
I let out a scream and then stopped when I realized I was wide and fully awake.
I saw Bastian yawn sleepily from his corner of the bed and stared at him with his droopy eyes.
“Was it just a nightmare?” I thought, panting heavily, sweat covering my forehead and my entire face rolled up in a crease. As I looked at myself from the bed mirror, I noticed my hair in an entangled mess, like I had just finished having rough sex and was waiting to be paid. I waited a few moments to catch up with my breath and to brush off the accumulated fear of moving at all at the thought of being gripped by the scary monster from my nightmare. I hit myself back to reality, and then made my way to the bathroom, turning on the tap of water, and splashing some against my dreadful face.
Looking up at myself through the blue rimmed mirror plastered to the white wall, a shade that brings out the beauty in me, but contradicted its purpose at my sight as I stared into it...
“What was that all about?” I asked myself the umpteenth time, contemplating if I was beginning to lose my mind, as the whole episode came into remembrance all over.
That registered letter she received must have spawned the strange dream. It was opened and left on top of the laundry basket before I went to lay yester night, I picked it up and read it out loud, convincing myself it was the letter to start with.
It was an invite by the homeowner of Rosendale Manor, Danielle Montgomery.
Danielle was inviting me to a reunion of a few people that made an impact on her life –like she really had one.
I began to wonder if Danielle finally got her life together, just like I did.
I dropped the envelope and went to my nightstand, I still could not pinpoint it, but I started to wonder how Danielle located my address, as it was unlisted throughout, especially after the “accident”. I became a ghost after what I went through in the woods, eleven years ago, just the memory of the incident, I endured during that rave party never left my thoughts no matter how much I tried.
After being referred for rehabilitation and after different therapy sessions upon session that brought out bad results, I had to finally lie to myself and pretend everything was okay when it clearly was not. I pretended to have the happiness I did not have and somehow, maybe it had to blend in at some point.
The invite was for next month and I had no intentions of going back there. Nothing could take me back to Rosendale. Nothing.
I took off my dirty night wear and wrapped myself around in my fluffy towel, flickering my eyes back and forth, still on edge and getting over the terrible nightmare as the seconds went by. I got into the shower, closing my eyes tightly as the chilled water wrapped my entire body, dripping towards my back and penetrating my soul. It gave me comfort and for a moment, I finally felt a moment of peace.
I spent more than my normal wash time. Once I got out of the shower, I changed into to a neat nightgown to go back to sleep.
I pulled the blanket over my head and was drifting back to sleep, a part of me hoping so strongly that I had a good dream this time. As I closed my eyes, the closet door squeaked open ever so slowly, leaving the door slightly ajar. I felt as if the darkness was watching over me and waiting.
I rushed over to my appointment, which is to possibly take over a new client as I was told the client’s current attorney has found herself in serious situation.
I was to meet them at a legal hot spot, “The Jilted Lover”. It was located in upper Manhattan, a coffee house that only the legal world frequented, as it had great Wi-Fi and comfortable seating, a sophisticated arena that had eyes for the top-notch around the precinct. Expensive coffee was sold and this deterred lots of the “regular” New Yorkers away. The staff and services were wonderful and also accommodating.
“Non-fat large latte, with two brown sugars and a spot of lactose-free milk, please. I will have a chocolate chip cookie as well”. I ordered my usual on getting to the cafe. I sipped the hot drink patiently, taking a notepad out of my black bag, as I scribbled some writing on it, waiting with full composure for my new clients.
I spotted two people walking in and something told me it was them. I turned calmly to approach the table I had instructed my new possible client to sit on, it was my tradition to choose this exact spot.
I had them sit near the side window where it was a bit more private, in case things got heated between the Attorney and I. Things like that were prone to happen and I loved abiding by the boy scout motto.
As I approached the table, the hairs on the back of my neck stood up, I began to have flashes of being lost in the forest again, during the night of the rave.
I felt sweat drip down my forehead, my heart started to beat faster than usual and my pulse started to race. “Get yourself together", I mentally told myself, as I felt the warmth of coffee dripping down the side of my cup and onto my finger.
I pulled myself together and pulled the iron chair out to sit, dropping the coffee on the table. As it burned at my skin, I dried my hand with the paper napkins on the table, apologizing frantically as I lifted my head up. It was then when it dawned on me, I had been sitting across a known Attorney and client when our eyes connected. A strange sensation took over me and I felt wet to the ears, embarrassed about my recent coffee spill but the joy I felt seeing them brushed it away, this time it was joy. "Drayton! “I looked at my client while his mouth was widely opened. I could see the thin lines forming on his face, amazement enveloping the atmosphere, as I looked sideways to see the Attorney.
“Ophelia?" I screamed. We both stood up from our seats, attracting stares from various parts of the coffee house as Drayton joined us, jumping at each other in joy, as we hugged one another in excitement.
Ophelia Jones happened to be an old classmate, one of the smartest and brightest girl’s in her high school. Women like me could not even compare. While Drayton was a troublemaker, and best friends with my high school romance; Juan, one of the chain smokers and lowlifes, not like I was any better.
I just stared at the two of them and smiled, flickering my eyes at every second on each of them, as I was so happy to see them.
I
was so dazed to see someone, anyone, from my past at all. It reminded me that I was not such a nomad after all and it was at this moment, I also realized that Ophelia was holding Drayton’s hand. The sight of those two holding hands amazed me, as I covered my mouth in astonishment. Now it occurred to me why they were here, and without saying, they looked so good together.
“Oh. Now I see what the issue is here!” I looked at the two of them holding hands and they pulled apart quickly when they noticed me staring.
"I'm sorry, I practically forgot that we can’t do this", Drayton said quietly and shamefully, “We just really care about each other and that’s why we thought it would be best to find another person to represent the case”, he added.
I took sips out of my already cold coffee cup and listened intently to Drayton’s story of what he was supposedly guilty of and how Ophelia and he met and fell in love. It was the love part, which warmed my heart the most, as Drayton was the last person I could imagine to fall in love.
I deepened in my own ocean of thoughts as Ophelia excused herself to go to the bathroom, leaving Drayton and me alone.
"It's really nice seeing you again, you really have no idea”, he said as he smiled. I could see the happiness boldly written all over his handsome face. We exchanged pleasantries and made funny jokes. We talked about the past and all the crazy times we had together until Drayton switched to a more important discussion.
"Faye, please can you come to the house today?" he narrowed his eyes at me, sliding his home address to me on the table. “I am proposing to Ophelia tonight, which is why I suggested we find another lawyer for my case”, my eyes dropped in sweetness. Love sure did feel good, I thought to myself.
"She doesn’t know about the proposal yet and I would love it to come as a pure surprise to her, as it is my birthday and she thinks I am throwing a mini gathering. I want it to fall in place for an engagement party and I would love to have you there. I don’t have any other friends around anymore, we have all grown up and apart". He paused for a little while and I could see the desperation in his voice, turning him down at this critical moment would be a hard blow to his face. "Would you please come?" he finally asked the one million dollar question.