by Kennedy Fox
Mason told them both not to come over that night, knowing I wanted him to just hold me, but they came over first thing the next morning. They hugged me for hours, and it felt good to just have them here. But I knew they had their own lives to get back to and sitting with me wasn’t going to change what happened, so I eventually had to push them out that night. They’ve called and texted me every day since, of course.
Déjà vu.
That’s what this fucking feels like.
But this time, I’m going to get real help because that’s what I need. I want to be the friend, the sister, and the girlfriend they know and love. I can’t be that when I’m drowning in my own guilt, choking on my emotions, and hardly surviving.
“Do you know where Dalton is?” Lennon asks. “Has he been transferred yet?”
“As far as I know, he’s still in ICU. He developed an infection after surgery, so they had to keep him longer,” I say, repeating the words Mason told me yesterday. Mason’s been in contact with the officer, and he has enough friends in the department to get whatever information he wants. “I’ll be satisfied when he’s in prison across the country.”
“Or maybe he should be six feet under,” Maddie chimes in. “That’d make me satisfied.”
She told me the day after when they came to visit that she regrets leaving me alone with him in the car. When we dropped her off before our meeting, she said her gut said not to leave me. But she couldn’t have known. None of us did, not until it was too late.
“He’ll get his justice,” I try to reassure her. “Some day.”
“Not soon enough,” Lennon mumbles.
We were all raised in a Christian household, went to church weekly, and attended Bible study classes from the moment we could read. Forgiveness was embedded into our minds since childhood, but it hasn’t always been easy to do. Forgiveness isn’t for the people who’ve hurt and betrayed you. It’s for you. To give you a peaceful mindset and to help you let go of what you can’t control.
Forgiveness isn’t easy. It isn’t something that can be done overnight, but it’s something I can focus on to try to release the anger. Forgiving someone for their actions doesn’t mean forgetting; it only means realizing what’s been done can’t be changed and no longer allowing it to control your every waking moment.
I want to forgive the things that cannot be changed and move on with my life once and for all, but I’ll never forget. Never.
“I’ll be sure to tell Mom and Dad you both said hello.” I snicker, pulling myself away from those thoughts with hopes to change the subject.
The next morning as Mason drives me to the airport, he holds my hand as if it’s his lifeline. I hate leaving him behind, but I know this is what I have to do, even if he doesn’t want to let me go. He’s protective and has told me every day for the past week how much he loves me, and I don’t doubt it for a second. Hearing those words feels so damn magical, especially considering how long he’s hid and tried to fight his feelings over the years. I know he means them. I mean them too. I love him so damn much. So. Damn. Much.
Once we arrive, Mason pulls over into the drop-off zone, and we only have a minute to say goodbye.
“I know why you’re going, but I’m still sad you won’t be home with me every day and that I can’t protect you.” He brushes my hair from my face as the wind picks up. Mason sets my suitcase down and cups my face. “I’m going to miss you so damn much, baby.” With our foreheads pressed together, tears fill my eyes at the pain in his voice. “Don’t cry, sweetheart. I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be here, waiting for you to come back home to me.”
I even told myself I wasn’t going to cry, but I’ve been crying for a week straight, so why should I have expected today to be any different?
“I know,” I say softly. “Thank you.”
“Will you text or call me when you land, please? So I know you got there safely.” We pull apart, and I nod.
“Of course. It’s not a long flight. I’ll text as soon as I’m there, then call you before I go to bed,” I promise.
“I never got to take you on our first date, you know…” Mason says with a small smirk. “I hope we can do that once you’re back.”
“That’d be great,” I tell him honestly. I know being gone a week isn’t going to fix me, but distance will help in the meantime.
“Okay, baby. I better go before they all start honking at me.” Mason cups my cheeks once again and slants his mouth over mine. At first, it’s slow and testing, and then he deepens it, sliding his tongue between my lips and seeking more. A moan escapes me as he presses his body into me, and it’s when a car tire squeals that I remember we’re not alone.
“I’ll see you on Saturday. I love you,” he whispers before pulling away.
Looking up into his gorgeous brown eyes, I see so much sincerity in them. Mason is my whole world, and I’d be crashing down without him. Love doesn’t even seem like a strong enough word to describe the feelings I have for him.
“I love you, too,” I tell him with a half smile. He looks so damn sad, which has me tearing up.
Mason wipes away my endless tears. “Text or call me anytime during your trip, okay?”
I nod, sniffling as I wrap my arms around him for one final hug. Then I grab my suitcase with my backpack on and head toward the sliding doors. Glancing over my shoulder, I blow a final kiss to the man who holds my whole heart in the palm of his hand.
“I love you,” he mouths.
I repeat his words, then walk into the airport with a new mindset, hoping I can start over for good this time.
An hour and a half after taking off in Sacramento, I land in Salt Lake City, and after grabbing my bag and texting Mason, I’m greeted by my parents. They have wide smiles on their faces and rush over to hug me.
“Sophie! We’re so glad you’re here,” my mom says while squeezing the air out of my lungs, and I wince slightly at the pressure.
“Kay, you’re smothering her. Let me give her a hug.” My dad chuckles, pulling me away. “How ya doing, kiddo? How was the flight?”
“Flight was good. How I’m doing is yet to be determined,” I tell him with a small grin.
“I made your favorite for dinner tonight. Meatloaf with twice baked potatoes and corn on the cob,” Mom says as we walk through the parking lot. My stomach growls for the first time in days.
“That sounds amazing, Mom. Thank you.” I flash a genuine smile, also something I haven’t done in days.
I think going home was the right decision.
Walking into my childhood bedroom is like walking into a time capsule. Nothing’s changed since the day I left for college. I’ve been home a few times since then, but it feels different this time around. I’m not here for an event or wedding. I’m here for me.
“All settled in, sweetie?” Mom asks from the doorway.
“Yeah, I think so.” I take a seat on the bed. I unpacked a few of my toiletries but left most of my clothes in my suitcase. I changed into one of Mason’s T-shirts for bed because not only is it super soft and comfortable, but it also smells like him. I already miss him terribly.
“I know you must be exhausted today, but hopefully we can talk tomorrow?” she asks, patting my leg as she sits next to me.
“Yeah, absolutely. There’s a lot I should tell you and Dad,” I admit, feeling guilty I’ve left so much out. The last thing I want is to keep important things from them, but it’s hard to talk about it in general. Also, I didn’t want to worry them with me living so many miles away.
“Well, get some sleep. I’ll make breakfast for you in the morning, and then we’ll go from there.” She kisses my cheek.
“Thanks, Mom. Love you.”
My dad stands in the doorway with a smile. “It’s good to have you home, kiddo.”
“I’m just visiting,” I remind him, chuckling. “But I’m glad to be home too.”
We say good night, and soon, I’m climbing into bed with the scent of Mason all around me.
> Sophie: I’m in bed. Gonna try to get some sleep. I love you.
Mason: I love you so much, Soph. Sweet dreams!
I smile as I turn my phone on silent and roll on my side. A dream catcher I made at camp one summer hangs off my old desk and grabs my attention. I used to sleep with it every single night above my bed to keep away all my nightmares. After a minute of staring at it, I get up, grab it, and hang it on my bed.
I might be in my mid-twenties, but you’re never too old for dream catchers.
Chapter Seven
Mason
This past week without Sophie has been lonely as hell. I know why she wanted to go and knew it’d be good for her to get away, but I’ve missed her like crazy. Walking into her empty room and knowing I couldn’t just climb into bed with her was harder than I anticipated. All I want to do is protect her from everything and everyone, and it’s easier when she’s close, but I know she’s safe with her parents.
Luckily, I’ve had to work all week, and afterward, I spent my free time in the gym. It’d been a while since I’ve boxed with my trainer, and I utilized this time to kick his ass. After catching Tyler up on the latest events, he didn’t even chastise me for being weaker than usual. Though, after a few sessions, I was able to finally beat him fair and square.
I’ve kept in contact with the officers to get updates on Dalton, but I’m still waiting for him to be transferred to the jail from the hospital. Of course my father got in my business as soon as he was informed and gave me shit for being involved in yet another scandal. Surprisingly, he hasn’t blamed me for threatening his reputation like he usually does. This was obviously different from the Weston incident, but considering both are from the same family, I expected him to chew my ass.
Today I finally get to pick up Sophie from the airport, and I’m so damn excited to have her in my arms again. She texted and called every day, letting me know what she’s been doing and how she talked with a professional counselor there from her father’s church. I’m happy she spoke to someone and that she plans to continue when she’s back home. I wish I would’ve suggested it after Weston so she wouldn’t have the weight of it all burdening her. Knowing Sophie, though, she does things on her own terms and can’t always be persuaded.
The moment I see Sophie on the escalators coming down to the baggage claim, I light up like a kid on Christmas morning. She looks ten times better than when she left, and she even smiles when she spots me.
Rushing toward her, I don’t stop until I scoop her up in my arms. “Oh my God, I missed you so much,” I say into her hair.
“I missed you too.”
I pull back slightly, cup her face, and capture her lips. She kisses me back but then breaks away a moment later. It’s then I remember we aren’t alone and people are walking all around us. Leaning my forehead against hers, I breathe out a sigh of relief. “So damn happy you’re back.”
“Me too,” she says, swallowing tightly.
I grab her hand and lead her to the carousel to grab her bag. Once we’re in the car, I reach for her hand and realize she’s quieter than usual.
“Everything okay, babe?” I ask as I pull onto the highway.
She looks at me and nods. “Yeah, just tired.” She reassures me with a smile.
I bring her hand to my lips and kiss her knuckles. “We’ll be home soon, sweetheart.” I flash her a wink.
The moment I pull into the driveway, I know shit’s about to hit the fan. Serena’s car is here.
And so is my father’s.
Motherfucker.
Of all days for them both to come over, they chose today.
“Why are they here?” she asks as I grab her suitcase from the back.
“That’s a goddamn good question,” I grit between my teeth. “I’m sorry, Soph. I know having people over is probably the last thing you wanted when you got home.”
She swings her backpack on and shrugs. “It’s okay. Not your fault.”
I lead her into the house, open the door, and when we walk into the living room, I notice my dad and Serena sitting on the couch. When they see me, they both stand. Liam’s in the recliner, looking uncomfortable as hell. I glare at him, silently thanking him for the non-heads-up.
He smirks and shrugs, then turns his attention back to the TV.
“Hey, what are you two doing here?” I ask, looking at my father. I don’t mind Serena being here, who’s come over a couple of nights this week to hang out, but my dad isn’t one for just popping in.
Looking over at Sophie, I notice she’s uncomfortable and offer to carry her stuff to her room for her.
“No, it’s fine. I can do it.” She takes her bag and walks to her room off the living room.
“It’s about Dalton,” Serena begins as soon as Sophie’s through her bedroom door.
I brush a hand over my jaw, inhaling a deep breath. “What about him?” I look back and forth between them, noticing the tension.
Before Serena can respond, my father shoves his hands in his slacks pockets, and blurts out, “He’s dead.”
Blinking, I’m too stunned to speak, and before I can open my mouth, Sophie gasps from behind me. “What?” The three of us turn toward her, and I notice the color has drained from her face.
“Soph…” I don’t even know what to say, so I stop myself. I hold out a hand, but she doesn’t take it as she walks closer. We direct our attention back to my dad and Serena.
“Are you sure?” she asks softly.
My father and Serena both nod.
“How? What happened?” I ask.
“Does it matter?” My dad scoffs. “The bastard who tried to kill you and your friends is dead. That’s all that matters.”
“It matters to me,” Sophie retorts. “How’d he die?”
Serena swallows hard, looking down at her shoes, and I know something’s off. “Serena, what is it?” I push.
“Two guards were transferring him from the hospital to take him to get processed at the jail. He was supposed to have his hearing next Monday to get officially charged. Then he would’ve stayed there while waiting for trial,” Serena explains.
“Right…” I know how it all works. “So then what happened between leaving the hospital and going to the jail?”
“There was a struggle during the transfer,” my father starts. “He reached for the guard’s gun and started fighting him. The other guard tried to get control of the situation and meant to tase him.”
I narrow my eyes, not buying any of this. “Meant to tase him?” I probe, crossing my arms over my chest.
“He was startled and grabbed his gun instead and shot him,” he continues. “There wasn’t anything they could do. The gunshot was right in his chest. He bled out.”
Looking at Sophie, I see she’s expressionless. I’m not sure what she’s thinking and don’t want to ask with other people around. I wrap my arm around her waist and pull her into my side, her breathing uneven.
“You okay?” I lean down and whisper.
Liam walks over before she can answer. “So let me guess, the Westbrooks are gonna come after the state for a wrongful death suit?”
“Possibly,” my dad answers though he doesn’t look the least bit worried. In fact, he looks like he’s already handled it. Handled them.
My jaw tightens. The events surrounding Dalton’s death are suspicious as fuck, and knowing my dad’s connections, this no longer sounds like an accident.
“If you’ll excuse me…” Sophie walks around me and goes upstairs. As soon as I hear the bathroom door shut, I step closer to the monster of a man in front of me.
“What’d you do?” I hiss, narrowing my eyes.
“Why do you assume I had something to do with this?” He asks it so casually, and it’s all the answer I need to know he’s responsible.
I hear Liam grab Serena’s attention, and they both take off toward the kitchen. Things were tense between us before, but now they’re about to snap.
“You called the hit, didn’t you?
How many prisoner transfer deaths are there really?” I ask tightly.
“At least a dozen since I’ve been the DA,” he responds. “It’s not that uncommon. It happens.”
“Quit your shit,” I growl. “Why’d you do it?” I ask, more calmly now. I don’t need him to admit it for me to know the truth. I just want to know why.
My father leans in, clenching his jaw as he lowers his eyes at me. “You should be thanking me,” he hisses, his voice low and guttural. “As long as he was alive, he’d always have the opportunity to fight for bail, parole, or take an insanity plea. Hell, you know the justice system is fucked. Why do you think I’m constantly stepping in to protect you?”
“Protect me?” I glare. “Or protect your reputation?”
“Both,” he admits shamelessly. “Now you don’t have to worry about anything. I did that for you, son.”
I scoff. This man is unbelievable. “You mean you did it so there’s another thing you can rub in my face, hold over my head, and use to try to control me. You should’ve just let the system take care of him. He murdered a woman; he would’ve had to do his time.”
“You and I both want to believe that, but there are too many people who slip through the justice system. It would’ve pulled you and Sophie back into court to continue fighting. Is that what you would’ve wanted? For her?” he challenges, and it causes my hands to ball into fists.
“Don’t…” I warn at the mention of her name. “You might be able to live with having blood on your hands, but I can’t. Not anymore.”
“And what’s that mean, Mason? You have more blood on your hands than I do,” he nearly spits in my face before shoving me aside and walking toward the door. My feet stay planted, not wanting to give him another glance. “Oh, and Mason?”
“What?” I answer without moving.
“His parents won’t come after Liam or you. It’s over.”
While that should be a relief, it causes my stomach to knot. Anything my father is involved in is never good. He more than likely paid them off to stay away. I should be relieved, but nothing my father does is ever selfless. He’ll want me to pay him back someday, and it won’t be anything good.