by Lee Strauss
“THEY SAY RELATIONSHIPS forged in a crisis never work.” Lucinda was counseling me between Algebra and Bio. “For example, remember the movie we watched on HBO called Speed?”
I grunted, “Kind of.”
“Well, the cute girl and the hot guy have to keep a bus over a certain speed limit or a bomb that is planted underneath will go off. They bond during this near death, hours long crisis, and by the end of the movie they are ‘together’.”
“Okay, yeah, now I remember.”
We moved down the crowded hallway. It was getting warmer and most of the kids had switched to short sleeve shirts. I always wore long sleeves at school. Too much bumping and shoving going on.
Lucinda kept talking. “So, then comes Speed Two. Same idea except with a cruise ship. The cute girl is back but no hot guy. The reason? The cute girl says relationships forged in a crisis never work or something to that effect.”
“Luce, your point?”
“It’s like that for you and Nate. You bonded during an unusual circumstance. A type of crisis.”
“Are you trying to encourage me, or should I go slit my wrists?”
“Casey! I’m saying, face up to facts and move on.” Is this what they called tough love? I hated her right now. But she was right.
“Thanks for the pep talk. I’m going to move on. Starting right now.” Still, I couldn’t help looking for him. He hadn’t shown up at my locker that morning, not for a casual hi, not even to inquire about my health. As I waited for my Bio class to start, I checked my schedule for English and frowned. Last class.
Lucinda sat down beside me and pushed her stool a little too close to mine, accidentally brushing against my bad arm.
“Ouch,” I squeaked. The bandaged peeked out from underneath my sleeve.
“What happened to you?” she said.
“I fell.”
Her eyes went all squinty. “I heard that Nate had to carry a girl to the nurse’s office from the library yesterday. Was that you?”
I nodded. “Yes.”
Lucinda’s brow furrowed, “So, you fell in the library?”
Ashley dropped her books on the desk on the other side of mine. “I heard about that, too. That was you?”
Oh, brother. Good thing my mop of curly hair covered the massive bump there. “I tripped and caught my arm on a jagged edge of a table. It’s no big deal.”
Ashley’s mouth formed a goofy smile. “How’d it feel to be carried by Nate Mackenzie?”
“It was awesome, except for the slice in my arm and the throbbing, bleeding part.”
Lucinda hissed into my ear, “You traveled with him again, didn’t you?”
Mr. Pybus called class to order. I was glad to be out from under Lucinda’s magnifying glass. She pulled her stool farther away from me. I couldn’t believe she was mad over this.
Nate wasn’t at the jock table at lunch. That’s when I knew for sure (probably), that he was avoiding me. It was hard for me to eat; not much room for food when my stomach had a big nervous rock in it. The new girl, Kelly, sat with Tyson. She giggled and he grabbed her porcelain hand, weaving his dark fingers through hers. I knew they were going to get together. It made me think of Rosa and the heartache she'd suffered just because she was black and Patrick was white.
Lucinda looked like she wasn’t even going to sit with me. I grabbed her arm and forced her into a chair. “Why are you freaking on me?”
“I’m not freaking.” She flicked her hair.
“Yes. You. Are. Look, Lucinda, I really need your friendship right now. I can’t deal with this PMS thing you got going on with Nate.”
Lucinda’s jaw tightened. She wouldn’t look me in the eye. “Luce? Come on?” I prodded. Her eyes grew glassy, and I thought she might start crying right in the cafeteria. She forced a smile.
“I just feel stupidly jealous that you are having this life with Nate, an adventure, and that I’m not a part of it. I feel left out, like you don’t tell me anything anymore.”
“Lucinda, I’m sorry,” I said. “I know I’ve been preoccupied lately. I didn’t mean to shut you out, or keep secrets. I wish you were part of my crazy other world.”
“Really?”
“Duh, yeah.” I reached and squeezed her hand. Skin to skin. We both sucked in a breath. Nothing happened. I smiled and let go. “See, it’s just not meant to be.”
The corners of Lucinda’s lips curled. “Wow. When you did that, I thought you were crazy, Case. Thanks for trying, but in all honesty, I’m glad nothing happened. I want to and I don’t want to, you know? It’s dumb.”
“It’s an unusual situation, and it’s not dumb,” I said. “So, we’re good again?”
Lucinda lifted her sandwich to her mouth. “We’re good.”
My Nate radar never rested, and I had my first sighting after fourth period. He was walking away from me, and I could see that he was looking down talking to someone shorter than him, but his body blocked my view and I couldn’t see who until he turned the corner.
It was Jessica. She giggled and pushed her strawberry blond hair behind her ear, then patted his arm. I felt sick. He’d gone back to her. Safe, predictable, fun-loving, pretty (stupid), Jessica. My world cracked open and I felt myself falling in.
I thought for sure that seeing them together would stress me to the point of tripping, but it didn’t. Geez, I was the most unpredictable person alive, even to myself.
But, next came English. How was I to survive that? I entered through the back door of the classroom. Nate was already in his seat, his back to me, and didn’t see me come in. Mr. Turner called the class to order and then I held my breath and waited. Would Nate turn to see if I was there? Seconds ticked by. Then, he did it. He turned slowly, and raised his chin in acknowledgment before turning his attention back to Mr. Turner.
Mr. Turner handed out worksheets on William Shakespeare-The Man, and the whole class was devoted to that. I couldn’t concentrate. I could barely breathe. Nate had looked at me. It meant he didn’t hate me entirely.
Mercifully, the bell rang. I fully expected Nate to high tail it out of class before he could run into me. He surprised me by coming to my desk.
“We should talk about it,” he said as I gathered up my books.
“Okay. Now?”
“Can’t. Baseball practice. After that?”
“Sure, what time?”
“Seven o’clock. I’ll come to your house.”
I nodded, forcing down the dread. I really wished we could get this over with. Seven o’clock was a long way away.
After school I packed up my homework, swung my backpack over my shoulder and walked with Lucinda past the baseball diamond.
“I think I like basketball season best,” Lucinda said. “You don’t have to worry about the weather, or squint through the sun to see a cute guy’s face. Everything is nice and close.”
“Sports are all consuming for some people.”
“Meaning Nate?” Lucinda pushed a pair of sunglasses onto her face. I followed suit—the spring glare was blinding. “How was English today?”
“He wants to talk after baseball.”
“That’s good.” She saw my face. “Isn’t it?”
“I don’t know. Something happened…”
“I knew it. You are secretly dating.”
“Lucinda, honestly, if Nate was more than a friend to me, I wouldn’t be hiding it from you. I wouldn’t hide it from anyone. I’d shout it from the mountain tops, so stop acting like I’m dating on the sly.”
“Hey, I’m just joking.”
I ignored her. Lucinda swung her arm around my shoulders giving me a quick squeeze. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be insensitive. You know I’m rooting for you, right? I just want whatever makes you happy.”
At that moment, Nate caught the ball, and then looked up from across the field spotting me. He paused before throwing the ball back to the pitcher.
“I’m sorry, too, Luce. I know I’ve been a nut case lately.”
Her cell phone rang, and Lucinda dug through her purse looking for it.
I pointed to my watch and mouthed, “Later.”
She nodded, while answering her phone and mouthed back “Call me,” meaning after the talk.
On the bus I daydreamed about the coming meeting, imagining all the ways Nate could back out of our friendship. It was like we were breaking up, even though we'd never actually gone out. It would be the “non break-up” break-up.
What speech would he choose? The “it’s not you, it’s me,” speech, or a revised version of the library talk. “I thought I was stronger, Casey, but I can’t do this anymore. Besides, I have my future to look out for and let’s face it, I’m leaving for Toronto soon.”
When the bus stopped at my stop, I was thoroughly depressed. And thirsty. The sun beat down on my head, and my throat was parched. It could’ve been a result of the heat, or it could’ve been the effort I was putting into holding back tears. Without thinking I walked into the convenience store, welcoming the blast of air-conditioning, and headed straight for the refrigerated drinks. My arm reached out to grab a dark soda, nearly missing contact with another whiter arm.
“Oh, excuse me,” I said.
The girl had long blond hair pulled into a ponytail and bright-red glossy lipstick on her lips. She wore a colorful retro dress—it reminded me of the one I’d borrowed from Rosa— with a short jacket that didn’t match and flat tie up shoes. She flashed me a wide smile, revealing straight, white teeth.
“No problem, you go ahead,” she said.
“Thanks.” I took a soda, handing it to the girl. “Is this the one you wanted?”
“Yes, that’s great. It’s so hot out today. I’m just dying of thirst.” She accepted the can revealing a handmade beaded bracelet on her wrist. Alphabet beads spelled the name “Adeline.”
I took a second soda for myself and watched as Adeline walked the aisles nonchalantly and then scanned the candy bar rack. She had ear buds in I hadn’t noticed right away and she started singing, aloud, right there in the store. Crooner-type music, maybe Michael Buble, and she had a pretty good voice, too. I had to admire her, the carefree way she dressed and her unrestrained public singing. Like she couldn’t care less what anyone else thought of her.
A pang of envy gripped me. Why couldn’t I be like her? Why couldn’t I just be a normal girl? I got in line to pay and Adeline followed in behind me, soda can in hand. I guessed she'd decided against the candy bar. She flicked a strand of blond out of her eyes.
The cashier rung in my order and I plunked a five-dollar bill on the counter. I collected my change and turned slightly towards Adeline, behind me. Her eyes were different. The previous sparkle had disappeared and she seemed disoriented.
And she had dark rings. She opened her hand, peering at the change resting in her palm, before laying it out on the counter. Then she walked purposefully out the door, all the carefree attitude of a moment ago, gone.
“Hey! Wait a minute.” I ran after her. “Adeline?” She spun on her heel.
“Do I know you?”
“Uh, no. I saw your bracelet.” She checked her watch and peered down the street.
“Oh, well, I have to catch a bus.” She walked on, and I followed her. I tried to put myself in her shoes. I supposed I could come off as a bit of a wild-haired stalker.
I softened my voice, “I was just wondering, um, did you just go somewhere?” This was tricky.
“We’re all going somewhere, aren’t we?”
“I know, it’s just, I noticed your eyes.” She looked down, self-conscious. “I mean, it happens to me, too. I uh, go places. I get rings under my eyes.”
I sounded like an idiot. I couldn’t bring myself to say I’m a time traveler. She’d think I was on drugs for sure. Unless I was right and she was one, too.
She stopped and stared. “What do you mean, go places?”
“Well, sometimes, I feel this dizziness and a bright flash of light, and I trip….”
“You fall down?”
“No, by trip I mean I travel.”
Her eyes widened. “You’re a traveler?”
I nodded, keeping my expression friendly in a non-psycho way.
“Time?”
“Yes, I travel through time.”
She turned and continued walking. Maybe I'd missed something. Did I read the signs wrong? We arrived at the bus stop and she slid onto an empty bench. I sat beside her, keeping enough space between us.
“So, when you trip, to when do you go?” she said.
“The eighteen hundreds.”
Her left eyebrow shot up. “Really? Wow. And I thought I had it bad. How’s that, anyway?”
I shrugged. “Okay, I guess.”
“I hang in the nineteen fifties. But my dad and I are moving to California soon, and I’m worried.”
“I get that,” I said. “It’s hard enough when you know what to expect. It’s the reason I never go anywhere. I’m a non-traveler on this side of things.”
Maybe Adeline had the answers I wanted. “Do you know why?” I said. “Why you, uh, we, travel? Is there some cosmic point, or something?”
Adeline considered me for a moment. “I don’t know. I wish I did, believe me.”
I let out a disappointed breath. I wasn’t really surprised, just, it would’ve been nice if she knew. “Have you met any others?”
She shook her head, “No, you’re the first. Have you?”
“Yes,” I told her about Samuel.
“Wow. That’s crazy.”
A bus screeched to a stop. “I’m sorry, I gotta go,” she said. “But hey, thanks for chasing after me. It’s cool to know I’m not alone.” She took the first seat and leaned her head against the window, closing her eyes. She was exhausted.
Me, Samuel, and now Adeline. For so many years I'd thought I was the only one.
Now I wondered how many of us there were out there. I tossed my soda can in the recycling bin and headed towards home.
And I remembered Nate and our impending 7:00pm appointment. Ugh.