by S. C. Adams
“Why are you being so weird?” he yells. “I’m not using her. We both want to hook up! Sounds like you may be deflecting a bit, bro. Besides, why do you care? What does it matter if I fuck your baby mama’s best friend?”
There is nothing wrong with Luke having sex with Emma at all. They are two consenting adults, just as Jillian and I had been. I’m worried about looking bad to Jillian. I don’t want my best friend to crush her best friend’s heart and make things awkward for us forever.
I know that Luke is right. I’m going to have to talk to Jillian soon, but I don’t feel like I’ve done anything wrong. And so, I decide that I am going to hold out and wait for her to hit me up first.
I had no idea how long I would be waiting for that call.
35
Jillian
We are sitting on the beach together, enjoying the sunset. The wind is blowing through my hair, the salty smell of the ocean wafts through the air, and my body is wet and ready.
I can feel him behind me, soaking in the sun and the pleasure. He is rubbing my shoulders, his legs wrapped around me, and I know what he wants.
Suddenly, it isn’t the beach anymore. We are out in the forest. The trees are everywhere, and only the surrounding wildlife knows what is about to happen.
It’s the mountains. The mountains that I want to return to. I am lying on the forest floor with my legs spread and my body ready to succumb to pleasure.
Mason walks up to me, naked and buff, strong and capable. I think he will insert his massive member straight inside me, but he waits. He gets down on the ground with me, sitting between my legs with his hands and mouth moving slowly to my trembling center.
He eats me out, licking my wet pussy like a master. The forest sways and moves along with his movements. He is in total control of me and the trees. He is going to feast until he is satiated. I, in turn, keep my hands securely behind his head, running my fingers through his hair and digging my nails into the back of his neck.
There is a loud noise nearby, startling us both. Is there someone in the forest with us? We aren’t sure what it is, but that doesn’t stop him from kissing and licking my sex, touching my G-spot with the tip of his tongue. We can get caught, but that makes the sex even hotter.
He moves his head from my lap, his face coated with my cum. He still makes me wetter than any other man has.
“On your knees,” he orders. “I want to fuck you from behind.”
I do as he says, and immediately, I feel him entering me and stretching me. I am bent over for him, and he gives me his cock perfectly. He slaps my ass hard, the reverberation echoing in the forest.
“Oh, Mason!” I cry out.
Each time I call out, he spanks my ass, harder each time. His cock is so deep inside of me that I feel like he will break me. He is merciless, going harder the louder that I scream and moan. It’s an elegant forest dance that is building up in intensity with each passing moment. He keeps slapping my ass.
I rub my clit as aggressively as I can, causing my walls to shatter and collapse around his mighty base. He pulls out and rolls around on the ground, ending with him lying down on his back with his big dick up and ready for me. I know what he wants from me, and I am happy to give it to him. I miss bouncing on his cock.
He loves watching me while I ride him. I love straddling him and grinding into him hard, leading the dance and pumping his fine weapon. He grabs my breasts and holds them while they bounce up and down. I love being on top of him.
He exclaims, moaning loudly and growling like an animal. We keep whispering sweet nothings into each other’s ears, fucking each other harder and reaching the edge of pleasure. He grabs onto my ass, I slide down his shaft once more, and together, we climax and tremble against each other.
Suddenly, I am no longer in the mountain forest having hot sex with Mason. I am in my bed, naked and alone.
“What the fuck,” I say, grumbling.
Even though it is indeed a dream that I am waking up from, it felt real. Once I accept that I’m awake and the mind-blowing sex isn’t really happening, I grow frustrated and annoyed. I hate that I am still dreaming about him. He makes appearances in my dreams often, despite not seeing or speaking to each other in over three weeks.
I am groggy all morning, leading up to that afternoon when I have to get ready for work. My managers want to talk with me about the upcoming months, and I’m not sure what all is going on. I’m not sure if we’ll be taking pictures or discussing business, so I dress for both.
I get in my Lyft, still feeling off and perturbed from my dream. It feels like harsh punishment to keep having Mason in my dreams without having him in person. It hurts because in reality, I realize that another day has gone by where I haven’t heard from him. He isn’t talking to me, and I’m not talking to him. I feel sure that he doesn’t want me and that I will be caring for our child on my own—a mother to a child, just a random chick that got pregnant to an absent baby-daddy.
Emma calls me on my way to the studio.
“Hey,” I answer.
“Honey, you better get in here now,” Emma says with urgency.
“I’m on my way. What’s up?”
“Vivian and Trish both came up to me and asked about you being pregnant,” says Emma. “They know.”
My heart sinks. “How do they know?”
“I’m not sure how they found out,” she says. “They didn’t talk to you about it?”
“Nope,” I reply, becoming more nervous by the second.
“If Vivian and Trish know, then probably all the managers at K-Plus know,” says Emma. “You’ll need to tell them once you get in. There’s no point in hiding it anymore.”
I spend the rest of my long ride to work worrying myself sick. I become more agitated the longer I sit in the back of the Lyft, cursing at the unnaturally slow traffic. It is a Sunday afternoon, and downtown feels like Monday rush hour with some major delays on the side.
As my Lyft pulls up to the front of the building, I see Emma standing outside waiting for me. I leap from the car and make haste.
“Hold up,” Emma says, halting me.
“I thought you said I needed to get to work as soon as I could?”
“I want to talk to you a minute first before you go in,” she says.
I glance inside the building, noticing two managers standing near the stairs, glancing down at their phones and looking at us in their peripheral vision.
“How did they find out?” I ask.
“I’m not sure how they figured it out—or who told them—but don’t freak out, all right? Just relax first before you go in and face them. Stay strong and confident like you’ve been the past month and a half.”
“I’m trying,” I say anxiously.
“How’s the baby?” Emma asks.
“What are you talking about? I’m not due for another seven months.”
“You know what I mean. How are you doing with the baby? Are you hurting at all today?”
“Not really,” I say. “I’m sore, but I’m sore every day lately.”
“Have you called Mason and ended your freeze yet?”
My heart skips a beat when hearing his name. “No.”
“Well, I encourage you to call him,” she says.
“You’ve been saying I should call him ever since we stopped talking,” I say with a snort.
“My point is going to be that it might be good to patch things up in case you hear bad news in there,” she says. “You don’t need to keep ignoring him out of pride. After this, you’re calling him.”
I take a deep breath and step into K-Plus, ready to accept my fate.
36
Mason
Deliveries are slow that day. Sunday’s are usually mild regardless, but it’s too quiet, even for living in a mountain town.
This day is also unique because I’m returning to L.A. after being away for weeks. I decided that I’m going to be the bigger person and talk to Jillian first. Neither of us have says a word t
o each other in three weeks, and neither of us wants to be the one to talk first. I’m done with waiting and wondering. I’m going back to talk with her and figure out what is going on with us.
The roads are nearly empty for me until I reach Los Angeles County. Built-up traffic keeps me from reaching K-Plus when I want, but I make it there with the sun still in the sky and people still at work.
I want to go in and look for her, but I don’t want to make her look bad or unprofessional in any way, so I hold back. I wait outside of K-Plus for her to be done working. I assume she is in, but my backup plan is to talk with Emma if I can’t get Jillian. I see Emma’s car in the parking lot and know she has to be there.
I am proved right shortly after I saw her car. Emma comes walking out of the building, surprised to see me standing there. I wave to her, and she comes over to me.
“Mason?” she asks.
“Hi, Emma,” I smile. “How are you?”
“Fine. How are you?”
“I’m okay,” I reply. “You wouldn’t happen to know if Jillian is working today, would you?”
“Are you waiting outside for her?” she asks. “Is that why you’re here?”
“Yes,” I answer. “I need to talk with her.”
“You’ve got that right,” she sneers. “What is up with you two? Why are you guys being so weird?”
“I don’t know, and that’s what finally got me in the car. I barely even remember what got us not talking in the first place. I don’t want her to be alone anymore.”
“Well, I’m glad you’re here,” says Emma. “Better late than never. She’s a little busy at the moment, though. She’s in a meeting with our managers right now. They found out that she is pregnant and wanted to talk with her ‘about her condition.’”
“Oh, my God,” I utter.
“Yeah, so this could go either way,” she says. “It might not be a good idea that you’re here because she might be really upset when she comes out of there.”
“Should I leave?”
“No, well, I don’t know what you should do,” Emma admits. “If she is really upset, seeing you might make her feel better. I mean, I’m not sure. I’ve had a hard time getting a read on her lately. She’s been crazy hormonal. She’s bitten my head off a few times recently. She can be vicious.”
A couple of minutes later, Jillian comes walking out of the building, looking flustered and lost. She sees Emma and I standing in the parking lot together, and she slows down to a stop once she registers that it is me.
“Mason?”
“Hey, Jillian,” I reply.
“So?” Emma asks her. “What happened? What did they say? How did they find out you were pregnant?”
Jillian and I stare at each other for several seconds, and I’m savoring the moment. I’ve missed her terribly, and I’m instantly angry with myself for having let things go this far. I hope she misses me too.
“Hey, lovebirds,” Emma interjects. “You guys can go crazy on each other later and get a room. Jillian, talk to me!”
“I’m not sure who found out and told management,” says Jillian. “I have my theories, but they didn’t want to tell me who told them. They just said, ‘Gossip travels fast among models.’ Figures that they wouldn’t give up the rat. I don’t care, though.”
“I would care,” says Emma.
“It’s done,” says Jillian. “I’m not going to waste my time staying mad. It’s out there, and pretty much everyone at K-Plus knows now.”
“So, what did they do?” I ask.
She hesitates a second before answering me. “Well, they said they’re not going to call me until after I’ve had the baby.”
“That’s bullshit!” Emma yells. “We could sue their asses, Jillian. You’re not even showing yet! You could totally have a case.”
“What did I just say about not staying mad?” Jillian responds.
Emma smirks. “They better give you severance.”
“Well, they did give me something interesting,” says Jillian. “They said they felt bad about having to stop calling me for these shoots. Apparently, Kayla Baker heard about me being pregnant, too.”
“As in the owner and CEO, Kayla Baker?” Emma asks with wide eyes.
“That’s the one,” she confirms. “She really doesn’t want women to model when they’re pregnant, apparently. She thinks the stress of pregnancy and work combined is too much to handle.”
“This coming from someone who probably doesn’t have kids herself,” I add.
“She just had a kid with her husband,” says Jillian. “I think she’s probably speaking from experience. I don’t think it comes from a bad place.”
“So, you’re not allowed to work for seven months?” Emma asks in disbelief.
“Not necessarily,” she answers. “They took me off one gig and are offering to give me another. K-Plus is expanding into maternity wear this spring, and they need models for the new maternity line. So, when I really start showing, I’m going to have a gig until I give birth! I’m totally okay with that. It’s not that different from what I’ve been doing, and it’s a job! I guess I still technically work with K-Plus. I’m just on a temporary hiatus from anything intense.”
“Who knew getting pregnant could get you work!” Emma says happily. “That’s so great, girl. I’m so happy for you!”
The girls hug. Jillian looks at me while they hug, her green eyes staring into my soul.
“So, you’ve got a couple of months off,” says Emma. “What’re you going to do first? Do you want to go out and celebrate?”
“As long as it doesn’t involve drinking,” I interject. “You know, because of well, you know.”
I feel like a stuttering buffoon, unable to form any coherent sentences of any kind.
“Mason, how are you?” Jillian asks.
“Doing well, thanks.”
“You mind if I ask why you’re here?” she asks.
“I really wanted to talk to you,” I answer. “I know I could’ve called or texted, but I thought it would be better to speak in person.”
Jillian and I both look over at Emma, trying to silently communicate our wish for privacy. She doesn’t get the hint right away, but when she does, she lifts her eyebrows and goes back into the K-Plus building.
I clear my throat, licking my dry lips and hoping I won’t sound foolish.
“I wanted to say—I miss you. I don’t like us not talking.”
“Me either,” says Jillian.
“I don’t know what I said or did to upset you back at your place, but I would take it back, whatever it is,” I continue. “I’m sorry, and I don’t want you mad or upset with me anymore. I liked where things were going with us. I want to be there with you like I said I would be. That’s how I’m feeling. I don’t know about you.”
“I’m an emotional fucking rollercoaster every goddamn day,” she says, laughing. “That’s how I’m feeling. I’m a mess. I already want this child out of me so I can go on living my life the way I wanted. But I’m ready to have this baby, I think. I do still freak out on occasion, but I’m not the disaster I was when I first found out I was pregnant.”
“You weren’t a disaster,” I say reassuringly. “It happens.”
“Yes, I was! I got mad because of that one stupid phone call you had with Luke that morning!”
“So, that is what it was.”
“Yeah, I got mad because you says I am just a friend,” she explains. “You were going out to talk on the phone, and I heard you say it more than once.”
“I didn’t mean it the way it sounded,” I say desperately. “I was downplaying it to Luke—he’s one of my boys—that’s just how we talk—”
“Mason,” she interjects, stopping me. “I’m not mad. I want to apologize for my despicable behavior that day. I way overreacted. I’m confused, sick all the time, and have to push a baby out of my vagina in seven months—I’m just overwhelmed. I’m also very hormonal. In fact, I bet it was my hormones that made me freak out
on you like I did.”
“I did wonder about that.”
“I’m sorry, Mason,” she says. “Can you forgive me?”
“I can forgive you right now,” I say. “Watch: I forgive you. It’s okay, and thank you for apologizing.”
“Well, thank you for forgiving me.”
We stand there in silence for a few awkward moments, unsure of where to go from there.
“So,” I say. “Are we—we’re cool, right?”
“Oh, yeah,” Jillian replies with a smile. “Also, you know, I’m sorry for ignoring you like that for almost a month.”
“We’re both guilty of that,” I say. “I’m sorry I didn’t try talking to you more after that day. Sorry it took me this long to get here.”
“It’s okay,” she replies. “I’m just glad you’re here.”
Even though I have just arrived in Los Angeles, I’m already thinking about what it will be like to take us far away from there.
“Since you have some time off, maybe you’d want to come hang with me at my place?” I propose. “We could catch up, go for a hike, watch movies. Whatever you want. Anything that doesn’t involve booze.”
“Anything that doesn’t involve booze?” she asks with raised eyebrows.
“Yes, ma’am,” I tell her. “Ladies’ choice.”
“Okay!” she agrees. “Let’s go to your house. Could I get some clothes and toiletries first?”
The ride up the interstate through the mountains is quiet. We hardly speak or look at our phones. We have her phone synced up to the music player in the car and let her playlist act as the soundtrack to our journey—not the physical journey we are on at that particular moment but on the journey we embarked on from the moment I took her to Luke’s beach house.
We are quiet because we still aren’t sure where we stand with each other. I’m happy to have her with me, and she’s content sitting in the passenger seat of my car, but with such a gap between seeing one another, we aren’t assuming anything. We aren’t forward about anything, sexual or otherwise. We can be anything we want: good, platonic friends that have a kid together, friends that have terrific sex whenever they see each other, or maybe we can be nothing at all. I’m hoping for more.