This isn’t real. It’s a dream. It has to be. Logan isn’t dead. He can’t be.
Nate shocked him again. And once more.
The tears now streamed down my cheeks in a steady waterfall. Logan was dead. Dead. He was gone.
My lover. My protector. My hero.
Dead.
No. No. Please, Logan. Please, come back to me. Please.
I squeezed my eyes shut, unable to watch them anymore. Overwhelming pain engulfed me, smashing into me like a vice. I covered my face with my cuffed hands, not wanting to see Logan’s lifeless body. I’d lost first my mother, and now my sweet Logan.
No. Not Logan.
Mind-numbing misery surrounded me, sucking the breath out of my lungs. My sweet Logan was gone.
Gone.
I curled into myself and sobbed.
CHAPTER FORTY-THREE
Nishi
A hand gently touched my arm, jerking me out of my haze of pain. I blinked up at Noah, who gazed down at me with kindness in his eyes.
“Nate brought him back, Nishi. He’s alive. Now we’re giving him a blood transfusion.”
What? He was alive? I hitched in a breath as Noah gently drew me into his arms, offering his comfort. I couldn’t hug him back with my hands bound, so I simply leaned into him and accepted his warmth. His strength. He was Logan’s dreg partner. His best friend. He loved Logan as much as I did.
Logan was alive!
Alive!
A joyful sob burst out of me. He was alive!
Noah gently set me away, and I watched urgently for the next several minutes while Nate hooked Tony up to an IV line that appeared to be gathering Tony’s blood into a collection bag. Then Nate gently pressed a small pump that forced Tony’s blood into Logan through an IV line in Logan’s arm. Direct transfer of blood. My mother had told me about that and how amazing it was. Now I was witnessing it for myself.
Nate glanced up, catching my stare. “Tony’s blood seems to contain the most powerful healing properties of all of us, so he offered to go first to help give Logan that extra boost he’s going to need to survive.”
Mama had mentioned the special healing properties of dreg blood, but I didn’t really know what that meant.
“In emergency situations such as this, another dreg’s blood helps boost the injured dreg’s immune system and encourages faster healing,” Nate informed me. “Tony had to go through several blood transfusions in a short amount of time recently, and as a result, he has developed faster healing abilities. So sharing his blood with Logan will give Logan a better chance at survival.”
“Okay,” I whispered. Sharing blood. Faster healing abilities. Boosting immune systems. It was all so fascinating. Like science fiction. Almost unbelievable.
Except it was real. All the dregs were living proof that miracles did exist. Each one of them was special, a miracle in his own right. Truly incredible individuals. And I loved them all, even the ones I barely knew.
Noah gently squeezed my arm. “Let’s get those cuffs off you, all right?”
I held my arms out while he slid a key in the lock and freed me. It was only then that I realized they’d already un-handcuffed Logan. I’d been so scared, so full of pain and worry, that I hadn’t even noticed when they’d freed him.
These guys were amazing. A group of true friends—brothers—who always had each other’s backs. I’d never known that kind of loyalty before. That kind of unwavering trust and acceptance. If Logan survived, would I become a part of their close-knit group? Would they accept me as a part of Logan?
“He really loves you, you know,” Noah murmured. “I’ve never seen him so crazy over a girl before. Did you know he’s been celibate for seven years? But you had him from the start. He was ready to break his vow of celibacy to be with you. Because that’s how much he loves you.”
I swallowed hard, my eyes swimming with fresh tears. Why had Logan made a vow of celibacy? And why had he chosen me to break that vow with?
“Thank you. I love him, too. More than anything.” I hesitated, then asked to the group in general, “Are you guys all okay with me being with him?”
Tony cleared his throat across from me where he sat generously donating blood to Logan. I glanced up at him, expecting some resistance, but instead, I got something totally unexpected.
“I wasn’t so sure about you at first because of your association with the Black Dragons,” Tony admitted. “But it’s obvious you love him. And that’s really all that matters, isn’t it? Love. Of course we accept you. If Logan loves you, then so do we.”
My throat tightened, emotion clogging it. Fresh tears burned my eyes. Tony was willing to accept me so readily. Was it because of Grace? I loved Grace. She was awesome.
No, I think it was more than Grace. It was Tony’s love for his dreg brother. For Logan.
Noah nodded. “I totally second that. If Logan loves you, then so do we.”
The other dregs all murmured their agreement.
“Most of us at one time or another didn’t believe in love,” Noah went on. He glanced toward the back of the van where Tracker, Jacob, Ryan, and Luke all waited. “In fact, there are still a few of us who are disbelievers…”
I followed Noah’s gaze in time to see Luke roll his eyes. Luke was a disbeliever? He did seem jaded and harsh, but I had never imagined he didn’t believe in love. Didn’t everyone believe in love? I could imagine that perhaps Ryan was a disbeliever because of the sexual pheromone and the fact that he was an obvious player, but Luke?
“Anyway,” Noah went on. “Despite the few disbelievers in the group, I know I am speaking for all of us when I say we are grateful Logan found you. You make him happy, and that’s all that matters.”
A new wave of emotion crashed over me. These guys were all awesome, but I was a lone female amongst their midst and I really wanted another woman to talk to right now.
Mama.
Oh Mama, I so want to talk to you right now.
But Mama was gone forever. I had no other woman to talk to.
Or did I?
I glanced back at Tony. “Will you tell Grace to call me later? I really think it would be nice to have another woman to talk to.”
Amazingly, Tony’s expression softened. He fished his phone out of his pocket and tossed it to me. I caught it, glancing back at him questioningly.
“Go ahead, call her. I’m sure she’d love to talk to you.”
My heart clenched as fresh emotion washed over me. I really was a part of the dregs now. They accepted me simply because Logan loved me and I loved him.
“Thank you,” I choked out.
Tony nodded, glancing away.
I found Grace’s number in the phone under “Grace Bounty Babe” and let out a soft chuckle at his nickname for her. She answered after the second ring.
“What’s up, stud muffin? Did you kick some Black Dragon ass?”
I chuckled softly. “This is Nishi. Tony let me use his phone. And yes, the dregs all kicked some ass.”
“Well, hello adorable little Nishi,” Grace answered with laughter in her voice. “How are you? And how is my stud muffin?”
I let out another soft giggle. I loved Grace. She was so cool. “Your stud muffin is fine. He’s currently giving blood to Logan.”
Tony reddened and the other dregs all chuckled.
“Oh no,” Grace murmured. “What happened?”
A sob burst out of me, the seriousness of the situation hitting me again, and I found myself blubbering out everything that had happened. The dregs all glanced away from me, giving me privacy, though I knew they heard every word.
“Hang in there, girl,” Grace said gently. “If my stud muffin is sharing his super dreg blood, then I believe wholeheartedly that Logan will be fine.”
I glanced up at Tony, who was watching me. Could he hear Grace’s side of the conversation? Probably. These guys all had acute senses, after all.
I smiled at Tony. He gave a nod of his head and looked away.
“I’m scared,” I told Grace. “What if he dies? I can’t live without him.” I let out a quiet sob.
“Oh, Nishi. Be positive. He will survive. He has to. You are his future.”
Her words warmed my heart, relieving my fears. You are his future. She was right. I was Logan’s future. And he was mine.
“Thank you, Grace. Thank you so much. You’re awesome.” Calling her had been the right thing to do. She wasn’t Mama, but she was a close second.
Grace chuckled. “Any time, Nishi. Is Tony available to talk?”
“He sure is.” I tossed Tony’s phone back to him. He caught it and lifted it to his ear, murmuring softly to Grace.
I tuned him out and focused on Logan. His color was slowly returning. Grace was right. Tony’s blood was helping him. Overwhelming relief swamped me. Logan was going to be fine. I just knew he was.
You are his future.
It wasn’t more than fifteen minutes later that Nate unhooked Tony. “Let’s roll!”
The dregs disbursed, heading to their vehicles. Noah patted my arm in reassurance, his gaze kind as he moved away.
And then we were all leaving the city, heading back toward the maze.
You are his future.
I clung to Grace’s words. Logan would survive. He had to.
He was my future.
And I was his.
CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR
Logan
I dreamt of blood and violence and brass knuckles.
Darkness. Pain.
Death.
A soft voice called to me, a gentle touch reaching into my dreams and pulling me out, slowly into wakefulness.
I blinked.
Once. Twice.
And there she was. My angel.
My Nishi.
She sat on the edge of my bed, leaning over me, her eyes wide and watchful, her face filled with concern.
My gaze locked on hers. “Nishi.” It came out sounding raspy and weak.
Her expression changed. Her mouth widened into a beautiful smile. Her eyes filled with happy tears.
“Logan! You’re awake!” She let out a quiet sob, squeezing my hand in hers. “I was so worried. I was afraid–”
“Shh,” I whispered, squeezing her hand back. “I’m here. I’m fine. I will never leave you.”
A tear spilled down her cheek, then another. She wiped them away, her gaze never leaving mine. “Am I your future, Logan? Are you mine?”
“Of course, little one. I love you. Always and forever.” Her sudden insecurity baffled me for a moment, but then again, I’d been badly injured, and I couldn’t blame her for being afraid.
“Why did you make a vow of celibacy?” she asked softly. “And why did you break that vow with me?”
I blinked up at Nishi, momentarily confused. “What?” How did she know about that? Noah must have said something to her. I wasn’t sure why he’d told her, but she did have a right to know about my past. About Himari. And it was time I told her.
I sighed, rubbing a hand over my face, trying to find the right words to begin.
“If you’ve made some kind of religious vow to be celibate and broke that for me,” she rushed on, “Then I don’t want you to resent me for that.”
Oh Nishi. I could never resent you.
“Come here,” I murmured. “I need to hold you.”
She hesitated, then settled next to me on the bed. I drew her into my arms, mindful of my injuries. “I didn’t make any religious vow of celibacy. I loved a girl once, long ago. Her name was Himari. She was a whore at the facility where the dregs were kept as prisoners. She was taken away from me quite cruelly. Murdered. Right in front of me.”
Nishi let out a soft gasp. “Oh Logan, I’m so sorry.”
I drew in a deep breath. Slowly exhaled. “Her death haunted me for a long time, so I vowed to become celibate and never to fall in love again. I maintained that vow until I met you. I was just trying to protect myself, is all. Keep from being hurt. But you broke through my walls. I fell for you the moment I saw you. You are more important to me than anything in the world, Nishi. Than any stupid vow. Understand?”
Nishi’s eyes filled with fresh tears. “Am I really that special to you?”
“Yes,” I assured her. “You’re that special. You are my love, Nishi, now and forever. Only you.”
She smiled at me, her face filling with joy. “And you are my love, Logan. Now and forever. Only you.”
She snuggled against me and we lay in contented silence for several moments, our love flowing between us.
“Your heart stopped,” she announced softly. “But Nate managed to shock it back to life. I was so scared, Logan. I thought I’d lost you forever.”
“Shh.” I gently kissed her brow. “I’m a dreg, remember? I’m not easy to kill. You’re stuck with me now.”
A knock came at my apartment door, then the sound of approaching footsteps.
“That’s either Noah or Nate,” I told Nishi quietly. “If it’s Noah, my connection to him alerted him that I’m now awake, and he’s come to see how I’m doing. If it’s Nate, he’s coming to check on my injuries.”
“Doesn’t matter who it is,” she murmured, “I love all of the dregs. They are special like you. Each and every one of them.”
Nate paused in the doorway, smiling at us. “Glad to see you’re awake. Mind if I check out your wounds?”
“Sure.” With Nishi’s help, I slowly sat up. Then I endured Nate’s probing while he inspected my injuries. Finally, he put his medical supplies away and stepped back. “Looking good. Tony’s blood must have given you faster healing abilities. I’m not sure if you would have survived without it. Your heart stopped and we had to use the defibrillator to shock it back to life. For a moment there, you had us all worried.” He glanced at Nishi. “He’s going to be fine now.”
She blinked rapidly. “Thank you. All of you have been great.”
Nate turned away. “We’re dregs. We look out for each other. No matter what. That’s what we do.”
“Thanks, man,” I called after him.
He paused at the doorway and turned back. “The others will want to come see you, then Tony, Tracker, Jacob, and I will be heading out. You and Nishi are welcome to come with us if you’re ready to leave here now. Idaho’s a pretty cool place, less people, more open areas. And no gangs or Company assholes.”
I held his gaze. “I plan to leave here soon, if I can convince Nishi to join me.”
She let out a soft gasp, turning to me.
Nate left us alone, the outer door closing behind him.
“Really? You truly want me to leave with you?”
“I do. I love you, little one. I want you in my life. Always. And someday, when you’re ready, I want to make you my wife.”
Her eyes filled with happiness. She leaned forward and pressed her lips to mine. “I will marry you right now, Logan.”
I chuckled, gently threading my fingers through her soft hair as I looked into her eyes. “Not today, my Nishi. But soon. Let me get better first. Okay?”
There was a sharp rap rap rap! at the outer door, then the thud of several sets of footsteps. Nishi and I glanced up as Noah, Ryan, and Luke came into the room.
“Hey man!” Ryan stepped forward and clasped my hand. “Glad to see you alive. Thought for a moment there that you were a goner.”
I jerked my head in a nod, emotion filling my chest. “Yeah. Nate told me. Believe me, I’m glad I didn’t die.”
Luke stepped forward and shook my hand. “We killed all the soldiers who kidnapped you, but the senator wasn’t there.”
“That’s because they took him to the hospital,” Nishi announced. “When I tackled him, he fell back and hit his head on the concrete.”
Noah swiped something on his phone. “Hmm. It says here that State Senator Collins was admitted to the hospital late Thursday night after suffering a hard blow to the back of the head from a fall down a flight of stairs.” Noah snorted, lifting his gaze. “A fal
l down a flight of stairs? That’s not very original. There is no mention of the dead soldiers.” He swiped his screen again, then tap tap tap…
“Oh, here’s a more recent article. Senator Collins is still in a coma two days after a fall that caused him to hit the back of his head. Doctors say it is unknown this early on if he will recover, as he is suffering from a deep swelling of the brain. A source for the senator says the senator’s family is praying for a speedy recovery and thank everyone for their prayers and well wishes.” Noah paused, studying something on his phone.
“What is it?” I asked.
Noah startled, glancing down at me. “Oh, um, nothing. He has a wife and daughter. She’s—the daughter—she’s, well, hot,” he murmured, his face heating. Luke and Ryan exchanged glances, Luke letting out a soft snicker.
Ryan snatched Noah’s phone and he and Luke checked out the senator’s daughter.
Luke let out a low whistle. “I’d do her.”
Ryan snickered. “Me, too.”
Noah’s face turned redder. “Knock it off, you two.”
Luke handed Noah his phone back. I reached for the phone, curious to see what had caught Noah’s attention. “Let me see.”
Noah hesitated, then handed me the phone. Nishi leaned closer to me, and I made the picture larger so we could see it better. In the photo, Senator Collins—the same asshole who had beat the shit out of me with brass knuckles and steel-toed boots—stood next to a woman who was obviously his wife, and a younger, beautiful blonde who looked to be in her early to mid-twenties. The younger woman had her father’s golden hair, but her eyes were softer, gentler, a striking blue.
I shrugged and handed the phone back to Noah. Sure, she was pretty. The girl was probably a pampered brat, having grown up as a senator’s daughter. And the fact that she was Collins’ daughter made me dislike her already.
“She’s pretty.” Nishi looked at Noah. “I hope she’s not as evil as her father.”
Noah cleared his throat, obviously embarrassed that he’d even mentioned the daughter. “Well, it appears, for now, that he’s still in a coma. I guess we can only hope he never wakes. But I think it would be smart for us to monitor his condition, so that if he does wake, we can be ready.”
The Trainer (military romantic suspense) (The Dregs Book 5) Page 28