by Laura Acton
“Hell, yeah! That would be great.” Kyle beamed.
Dan slid out of the driver’s seat and headed for the front passenger side as Kyle climbed into the rear. Zach’s face was alight with glee as he jumped up into the cab and behind the wheel.
Halting at the bumper, Dan peered at Scott, Adam, and Jeff. “Dual cab. Room for one more.”
Jeff glanced hopefully at his eldest cousins. He sincerely wanted to go but would acquiesce if they decided one of them should ride with Dan.
They could read his expression and shared a smile. Scott suggested, “Jeff, you go. We’ll follow in our vehicles.”
Throwing his arm around Dan’s shoulders, Jeff grinned. “Yeah, I’d like that a lot, Runt!”
Jeff and Dan took their seats, and everyone put their seat belts on as Scott and Adam went to their vehicles. Zach waited for Dan to tell him to drive.
Reaching out to the stereo, Dan pressed play and ‘Born to be Wild’ by Steppenwolf blared. Dan cranked up the music then flashed Zach a lopsided grin. “Perhaps we can find an empty parking lot to do some doughnuts in?”
“Awesome!” Kyle exclaimed as Zach pulled out of the storage unit.
Remembering Sara and We Won’t Be Late
66
December 25
General Broderick’s Home – Yvonne’s Sitting Room –– 5:00 p.m.
William stood in the middle of the yellow and blue room—Sara’s previous bedroom—both he and Yvonne felt closest to their daughter in here. A kaleidoscope of colors from the Christmas lights on a small tree became refracted by the tears welling in William’s eyes as his gaze fixated on the few keepsakes of his beautiful, sweet Sara.
Not a single day passed he didn’t think of Sara, the sweet light of his life. He kept count—seven thousand ninety-eight days, one hour, and thirty-nine minutes—roughly nineteen and a half years. Although, today always seemed the hardest—more so than her birthday and the day of her death.
Sara only graced this earth with her brightness for seven years, five months, ten days, eleven hours and fourteen minutes. Born three weeks early, just like Danny, on February ninth at 4:07 a.m., four pounds, and eight ounces. Died July nineteenth at 3:21 p.m.
Numbers always stayed with him—he tracked the years, months, days, hours, and minutes associated with his sweet, beautiful little girl. How could he not? Mathematics is something he excelled at, one reason he was such a fast marksman—just like his son. Daniel inherited his aptitude for mental calculations and languages, but the light which shone in him was all Yvonne.
Sara possessed Yvonne’s kindness and gentle strength. Though truth be told, William recognized some of himself in her. The day she took on three older boys, protecting her Danny, well, that was all him. Sara inherited the need to safeguard loved ones. Daniel received the trait from him too—in spades.
His second daughter, lovely, wild Becca was unlike Sara and Daniel. She had fewer inherent restraints, the result of how they raised her. Becca’s formative years were vastly different from Sara’s and Daniel’s. With Sara’s death and Danny’s reaction, neither he nor Yvonne could bear to lose a third child.
As a result, they tended to indulge Becca more than they should. After what happened with Daniel, William couldn’t bring himself to be ultra-strict. His decision turned out to be wrong and came with its own set of consequences. Becca possessed a heart of gold, but she grew up flighty and irresponsible and happily bounced through life.
Becca doesn’t think before acting, only flashes her beautiful smile and bats her lashes to get what she wants. Her puppy dog eyes get me every time. I coddled her when I should’ve required more self-discipline. I screwed up with both children … too hard on Daniel and too soft on Becca.
With Daniel back in their lives, William hoped his son might be a positive influence on his sister—perhaps ground her. Becca is still young and has time to find something which gives her life purpose. Yvonne believes fashion design could be the ticket. I hope she is right.
His vision blurred as his eyes beheld the yellow bunny on the shelf. Sara will be forever seven. He imagined her golden ringlets bouncing as she ran to him with her light-filled emerald green eyes dancing and a smile so bright the gloomiest shadows faded from view. Her tinkling laughter and squeals of delight as she and Daniel raced like the wind on their bikes filled his ears.
He held dear a memory of Sara’s fourth Christmas—the sight of her rosy, winter-kissed cheeks as she made snow angels in the backyard. Surprising his children on Christmas morning brought him an enormous amount of joy. For nineteen years he missed his little angel and the delight she brought to the entire family. This year all my children are home. Daniel restored the magic of Christmas with his surprise homecoming and breathed life into Sara’s memories.
As William continued to stare at Sara’s rabbit, he wondered what career his girl would’ve pursued. With her caring nature, maybe something in the medical field … a nurse or doctor. She loved animals—perhaps a veterinarian. Whatever she chose, Sara would’ve made a difference.
Although, perhaps she did even though she would always remain young. William held her close in his heart, a constant light as he fought the evils of this world. A reminder of why he did what he did—protecting innocence—a guardian on earth.
A gentle hand rubbed his back, and William turned, instantly knowing who entered the room. William sighed as he regarded Yvonne. Sara took after Yvonne in more way than sharing the same shade of emerald eyes. A true Broderick female, Sara possessed Yvonne’s gentleness supported by a steel core.
Yvonne’s eyes clouded with tears gazing at her daughter’s stuffed rabbit. They both mourned and missed their daughter, but Yvonne knew William never released his sorrow. He still carried his grief with him, along with the heavy cloak of blame he wore, due to both Sara’s death and Daniel’s estrangement for so many years.
Their family had been altered so significantly on July nineteenth, nineteen years ago. Everything changed that terrible summer day. They all bore the emotional scars. Becca included, though only three at the time she a had been deprived of having her father and Daniel in her life.
Yvonne attributed many of Becca’s flighty behaviors to trying to gain their attention. She knew Becca loved her brother and father, missing them both dearly when they were at the Yukon base. Becca didn’t comprehend why Danny couldn’t live at home. Several times Yvonne attempted to explain to Becca, but her daughter never fully grasped the reasons. By the time Becca matured enough to understand, she simply accepted they lived apart.
All the hurt needed to remain in the past. Daniel came home, and now they would embrace a brighter future. Her voice soft, she said, “William, time to lay your burden down. You carried unfounded guilt for far too long. It isn’t your fault Sara died, any more than Danny’s. You didn’t know the driver talked to Danny before you arrived. Let the pain go and remember only the good.”
She peered up at William and noted the tears welled in his eyes. Tears he had a hard time letting fall. Yvonne reached up and tenderly touched the corner of William’s eye with the tip of her thumb and slowly traced his cheek. “Let go, my love. Release your tears, regrets, and self-reproach. The threadbare and tattered mantle of guilt was never yours to wear. Shed it now and allow the light and warmth to fill you anew.”
William’s tears fell. What started as a drip soon became a solid stream. He reached out and held onto Yvonne as the river of aching and remorse washed out of his heart and soul—cleansing him.
Yvonne allowed her tears to flow too. Hers were ones of joy though. William liberated himself from his self-imposed prison as he lay his head on her shoulder. She whispered to him as she stroked his hair, “Sara is smiling today. Do you hear her laughter?”
William’s deluge ebbed, and he finally pulled back enough to look into Yvonne’s eyes. “Yes, she’s smiling. Her Danny is here for Christmas. God blessed me with you. After we lost Sara, you held me up and kept me strong when all I wanted to do was curl up and die.
Thank you, sweetheart. You are my light, soul, and heart.” He thumbed away the droplets glittering in her exquisite eyes and kissed her gently.
After their lips separated, Yvonne said, “Welcome home, my love. I’ve missed you too. Time for your wounds to heal.”
William turned to study the bunny and reached for the small plush toy. “There isn’t a day I don’t think of our sweet daughter.”
“Same here. So full of light and goodness. Though here only a short time, she profoundly affected many. Her life served a purpose. Sara brought joy to all those she touched.”
William smiled and let out a small chuckle.
“What are you thinking?” Yvonne asked.
“Well, … our Sara didn’t exactly touch everyone with joy. Remember the boys who hurt and taunted Danny? The one on the ground holding his family jewels definitely didn’t experience joy at her touch.”
A half-suppressed giggle escaped Yvonne at the memory. “Dan took such superb care of Sara. He always made her happy and watched over her, but Sara was no slouch. She fiercely protected her Danny.”
Her mirth, music to William’s ears. Squeezing the bunny, William said, “I still think about that day. Though only six, Sara bested all three of those miscreants.”
Yvonne said, “Reggie, Drew, and Perry always caused trouble at the park. Never liked those boys. Still makes me angry they deliberately knocked Danny off the jungle gym by throwing a football at him when he was distracted.”
William stared at Sara’s favorite toy in his hand. “I still cringe when the image of his blood covered little face pops up, even minor head wounds bleed so much. My memory of him clutching Sara’s bunny and trying hard not to cry as Jasper stitched him up chokes me up—he attempted to be brave.”
“Stoic, like his father,” Yvonne interjected.
“Yes, our boy behaved courageously, but so did Sara. The way Mrs. Fliedner described Sara’s actions, our girl embodied both Florence Nightingale and Athena when coming to the aid of Daniel. Rushing over to him and not being fazed by the blood, then insisting Daniel hold her yellow rabbit to make him feel better. She would’ve made a fine nurse.
“After those troublemakers started laughing at Daniel when he cried, calling him a baby with a bunny. Sara marched up right up to them and gave them a piece of her mind. When they pushed her and tried to kick sand in Daniel’s face … well, Sara never allowed anyone to be mean to her Danny.”
A proud papa grin expression lit William’s face. “Secretly, Sara impressed me. My tacticians couldn’t have launched a better offensive. Those hooligans never knew what hit them. She became a warrior goddess. Still can’t believe she head-butted Drew in the stomach, gave Perry a fat lip, and kicked Reggie in the groin. Those boys were as shocked by her actions as the mothers in the park.”
Yvonne’s eyes danced. “Truthfully, Sara surprised me. By the time Selina Fliedner reached Daniel, Sara had returned to him, knelt down, and comforted him as he threw up. That was his first concussion and stitches. Once you brought Danny home and tucked into bed, Sara snuggled up to him.”
William grinned. “I gave up putting her back into her bed after finding her cuddled up next to Daniel twice. Those two were inseparable.”
A warm smile graced Yvonne’s face. “Like twins born two years apart.” Her smile faded. “His grief was so intense.”
William embraced his lovely wife. “Yes, and although he no longer blames himself for her death, I believe he still mourns her. But he brought Sara back into the open, and her light back into all our lives.”
Hugging William, Yvonne smiled. “Yes, he did. And speaking of him … I haven’t seen Danny or the other boys for a few hours. Where did they go?”
“I’m unsure. Brody sent Daniel a letter, and after he read it, he said he needed to go someplace. He asked his cousins to go with him. Strange … he and Scott are closest, but he asked Zach to go with him first.”
“Did you read the letter?”
He shook his head. “If Daniel wants to share the contents he will. We need to respect his privacy.”
Yvonne agreed wholeheartedly with that statement. “I agree. Dinner isn’t for another hour and a half. Sit with me and let’s share our memories of Sara. It’s been too long since we talked of her on Christmas.”
Moving towards Yvonne’s favorite chair, William sat down and tugged her onto his lap. “You go first.”
Yvonne’s eyes glazed over for a moment then focused on William. “One of my favorites is from Sara’s sixth summer. She and Dan spent their days riding bikes. Becca being only two and too little to go riding with them, still begged to tag along every time they headed out to ride.
“I found the three of them in the garage one day. Sara was in the process of attaching Becca’s stroller to her bike with a rope. Becca gleefully smiled in her stroller while Dan appeared to be trying to stop Sara. When I asked them what they were doing, Sara peered up at me with those huge innocent eyes and stated, ‘taking Becca bike riding.’”
Yvonne chuckled. “Oh my, my heart flip-flopped thinking what could’ve happened if I hadn’t come upon her before they set out. Sara insisted she only wanted to make Becca happy. Danny tried to take the blame assuming Sara would be in trouble, but I could tell Sara came up with the plan.”
A smile bloomed as Yvonne recalled the day. “After I finished explaining to Sara reasons why tying the buggy to a bicycle might not be the best scheme, I decided to reward her thoughtfulness and treat the children. It was such a glorious day so we took a long walk to the ice cream parlor. Sara enjoyed pushing Becca’s buggy all the way there. I allowed her and Danny to run a bit with the stroller. I can still hear the peals of laughter from all three. A thoroughly splendid afternoon.”
William smiled. “Sara possessed a golden heart. I think we should share this one with Becca. Makes me sad Becca didn’t have the chance to go riding with Danny and Sara. One of my favorites is when Daniel taught Sara to ride without training wheels. Sara’s face as she pedaled around the park—pure joy. I’m glad I shared that memory with Daniel last summer.”
He then confessed, “You know the lecture I supposedly gave Daniel about using his words first? I didn’t reprimand him. Instead, I told him the way he handled himself with those bullies and how he helped Sara overcome her fear of riding made me proud.”
Yvonne’s eyes twinkled with merriment. “I know.”
“How?” Her admission stunned William.
“The way Danny gaped at you as if he had been awarded the finest treasure. He always sought to live up to what you expected of him, and he basked in your approval when you praised him. I’m happy you didn’t scold him. I was proud of him too. Our son and daughters inherited qualities from you which make me swell with pride.”
William embraced Yvonne. “I’m the luckiest man on the earth because you agreed to marry me. Thank you for our three wonderful children. Merry Christmas, my love.” He leaned in to kiss Yvonne long and slow showing the depth of his love for his one true love.
General Broderick’s Home – Front Driveway – 6:15 p.m.
Zach put Dan’s truck in park as the hard rock music with a beat blared. His grin a mile wide matched the ones on Jeff’s and Kyle’s faces. Dan’s expression, though only a hint of a grin, made Zach happy.
Scott and Adam approached the others with broad grins. As the doors opened, Adam called out, “That was loads of fun. Glad we found an empty parking lot.”
After unbuckling, Kyle leaned toward Zach in the driver’s seat. “Zach, I swear I’m never riding with you again. This is a truck, not an airplane. It isn’t supposed to fly.”
Chuckling as he got out, Jeff said, “Kyle, you’re one to talk. We could say the same for you except this isn’t a boat either. You came exceedingly close to ending up in the pond.”
“Not like I planned on hitting the ice.” Kyle blushed a bit, embarrassed at his near accident. He had not expected to hit an icy patch in the lot and almost skid into a pond. Only Dan’s qu
ick reaction from the passenger seat kept them from skidding into the water.
Scott came to a stop by Dan’s door. “Where in the hell did you learn to drive like that? Did TRF send you to some sort of training?”
Dan’s mind went back to some happy times with Brody. Then he turned to Scott, and his smile turned into a lopsided grin. “Brody actually. He was one hell of a defensive driver. He got our asses out of some tight spots with his skill. He loved fast cars and wanted a red Corvette. I’m sure he could’ve been a racecar driver like Grandfather Loving.”
Adam grinned, pleased to hear Dan talk about Brody. “Perhaps we can rent a Corvette, but when you’re not on heavy-duty pain meds. We shouldn’t have let you drive under the influence.”
“It was only in the parking lot,” Dan retorted.
“Yeah, Runt was safe enough,” Jeff defended. Though he recalled a time when Dan drove in a much worse condition. Christ, Dan was shitfaced drunk the night he and Brody drove the tank. Someday he would share the story with Dan, but not tonight.
Jeff still remained clueless about what caused Dan to drink so heavily on his nineteenth birthday—more excessive than anyone should or would to celebrate being legally old enough to consume alcohol. If the reason Dan drank near oblivion turned out to be something bad, Jeff didn’t want to bring him back down. His cousin spent enough time on an emotional roller-coaster today. So he decided to keep that particular story to himself.
“I suppose so. Even on meds, Dan did better than Kyle.” Adam smirked at his youngest cousin.
“Hey, I wasn’t that bad!” Kyle protested as he crossed his arms and assumed a mock indignant glare.
Scott grinned at his younger brother’s antics. “Just be satisfied you’re better at handling a boat than they are. Remember the time Adam ran us aground?”
All trace of being disgruntled disappeared as Kyle laughed. “Yeah, I do. Dan, you missed a great trip, Jeff taught me how to fly cast. I wish you could’ve gone with us. We need to go camping and boating this summer.”