by Amit Khan
I had complete control over Tilak.
I should have been the happiest person at that moment. Every plan of mine was being carried out to perfection. Yet my mind was full of doubt. I didn’t know…why? Maybe I was not confident enough. Maybe it was my first crime so I was scared.
The reason turned out to be different from both these possibilities.
Fear in my mind was not at all wrong.
The crowd in the penthouse was increasing. Tilak Rajkotia was a rich and famous guy. Naturally, he earned the sympathy of many well-wishers in town. Soon they started deciding regarding final rites to be performed.
“Mr. Tilak,” Dr. Maalpani stood up and said, “I want to talk about something important.”
In spite of a big crowd, there was grim silence in the penthouse at that moment. Doctor’s words reached everyone easily. All heads turned towards them.
I was waiting curiously too.
“It is very important,” Dr. Maalpani repeated his words. He was talking in a steady voice and composed manner. “Fifteen days back Brinda handed me an envelope… a sealed envelope. She wanted me to keep it safe. She wanted me to hand over this envelope to you in case something happened to her. She has probably written her final wish in this envelope and she wants it to be fulfilled.”
Dr. Maalpani took out a white envelope from his pocket. It was really sealed with reddish brown tar seal. Dr. Maalpani extended the envelope towards Tilak.
“Final wish!” Tilak was taken by surprise. “What final wish?”
“That, we will know after opening the envelope. That’s the only way of finding out Brinda’s final wish. She did not say anything more. Maybe, she wanted it to be a secret!”
My body shivered with new uncertainties.
My hands and legs felt numb.
‘Some new trouble’, I thought.
Was there a new hitch!
I felt a jolt. It was such a well-executed thing so far. And now there was a risk of losing it all.
My head was beginning to spin.
●
Tilak Rajkotia finally stood up to accept the envelope from Dr. Maalpani. He looked at it with bewildered eyes and confused mind.
All the people around were aware of the envelope by now. They could sense mystery around that thing in Tilak’s hand.
All faces were curious and tense as if it was not a letter but some kind of explosive that could go off any moment.
Like a time-bomb.
“Why did you not tell me about this before?” Tilak demanded to know.
“It was Brinda’s wish that this envelope is opened only and only after her death. In fact, she did not want to hint anyone that this kind of envelope even existed.”
“Surprising. Really surprising.”
“Why don’t you open it and read, Mr. Tilak,” someone from crowd suggested.
Obviously, that suspense was killing everyone.
My condition was critical. Even after death, Brinda had managed to haunt me. She had put my life at gunpoint by this new trap.
Tilak opened that envelope. The seal had to be broken to do so.
There was a paper inside the envelope.
I had walked up to him by then. As he started reading it, I started scanning it as well.
‘Dear Tilak,
I know this sealed envelope must have taken you by surprise. I had not hidden anything from you after marriage. There was no need to do so. Our lives were transparent and our relationship was crystal clear. Like a transparent glass. Seeing through each other's hearts was so easy. Reading each other's minds as possible. This letter is the first thing that I have ever done without your knowledge and I hope you will forgive me for that. Actually, it was necessary to hide this letter from you, Tilak.
It was something that had to be hidden.
At least as long as I was alive, I could not have revealed this to you. The Brinda that you loved so much; Brinda that you considered a cultured, virtuous lady, was actually not so virtuous.
Brinda was an immoral woman.
I don’t even remember how many men I have been in my life.
In fact, it makes me hate myself to remember all those moments that have been etched in my memory forever. I cannot forget the life I have lived. A sinful life!
Tilak, I have a request. This corrupt body of mine does not deserve auspicious fire. Please donate my body for medical research. Let my body be dissected and decimated for the purpose of research. Maybe that will wash away my sins.
I hope you will grant me this wish. This is my final appeal to you.
Yours forever,
Brinda
It was a strange letter.
I could relax now. It was not a dangerous letter for me. Brinda had not written anything that could be bad for me. I was able to breathe normally.
●
11
My Honeymoon
The next few days were dream-like. Time just flew merrily. Those were very happy days of my life- the happiest. I completely forgot that I was a call-girl in a nightclub once. My roots were connected to Foras Road was a fact that absolutely vanished from my conscience. The fear that used to make me spring up in bed in the middle of the night with the fear of having to go back to the nightclub was gone. I was free. I felt free. My mind was able to think clearly. Happiness was the only feeling in it during those days.
I was feeling like a princess.
I had everything.
As far as Brinda’s funeral was concerned, there was no problem. According to her final wish, Tilak Rajkotia gave consent to take her body to the medical research centre. He informed so to Dr. Maalpani. Then remaining formalities were completed by Dr. Maalpani. He brought some documents to the penthouse. Tilak signed them. Then he personally supervised the process of sealing Brinda’s body and taking it to the research centre. That chapter ended and ended well.
Then began the most important chapter of my life…Marriage!
You must be thinking why I am mentioning my marriage. You might wonder what that has got to do with all these events.
In fact, the real catastrophe in my life began after my marriage.
It was pure disaster.
Till one month after Brinda’s death, we tried our best not to draw any unwanted attention. Tilak and I were content with spending that time in peace. It would have been inappropriate to marry immediately after Brinda’s demise. We were living together so people were gossiping. There were talks of our relationships. I did not mind because that was good from my point of view.
One month later we got married in a simple ceremony.
The next day we flew to Singapore for our honeymoon.
I remember the resort very well. The resort in Singapore where we stayed for the honeymoon. It was a beautiful resort. It was especially reserved for honeymoon couples. None of the rooms were rented to anyone else. However, at that time, there was only one client in that resort who was not accompanied by his wife.
He was an Indian.
Sardar Kartar Singh.
Yes, that was his name.
He was a tall, strongly built guy. His age must have been around 35 years. He preferred to wear a red turban all the time and spent his entire day drinking alcohol. I never saw him sober.
There was a special reason that Kartar Singh was allowed to stay at the resort which was otherwise reserved for honeymoon couples.
Kartar Singh was married two years back and he had stayed at the resort with his wife. They were madly in love with each other. Their married life was blooming but four months back his wife died suddenly. Kartar Singh was in a state of shock. He had kept his date and was there to cherish second wedding anniversary. He had promised his wife to be there for the second anniversary. His wife left him before he could fulfill his promise. But he was there. Remembering her! Alone!
The happy memories had turned in to pain and Kartar Singh was seeking the help of alcohol to deal with it. He had spent some fabulous moments with his wife in that resort. Now all he had
was those memories.
Everybody sympathized with him.
Even I saw him. He was looking miserable. Somehow I felt that I had seen him somewhere.
●
Tilak and I were the happiest couple in the world.
Everything we dreamt was coming true. That honeymoon week was special.
All those days that we spent at the resort, we had sex many times. Not just nights; sometimes even during the day, Tilak would pull me closer and take me to the peak of ecstasy in no time. We had sex everywhere – in Jacuzzi, shower, kitchen, in front of the mirror, on the sofa and using the writing table and chair. Tilak had bought me a book of Kamasutra and we constantly tried various variations and poses to bring spice to our lovemaking. I had ordered several exorbitantly priced nights and sexy undergarments from Harrods in London to arouse Tilak. His favourite was a see-through nightie of white satin. Every time I wore it with high heeled sandals and open my hair, we would end up making love at least twice in quick succession.
He was crazy about me. Crazy about my beauty! Crazy about my smile! Crazy about everything about me! I had realized early on that sex was a hook or a leash by which I could control Tilak, like the way I had manipulated and controlled all the men in my life before him. I had made elaborate plans to buy sex-toys and BDSM accessories to keep him entangled and interested in me for the next few months until I gained control of his wealth.
A new trend was popular in Singapore in those days. It was a special tour organized for honeymoon couples.
Chartered planes were hired by honeymoon couples. At midnight those planes would take off with the couple. A romantic journey high up in Singapore sky! Celebrating honeymoon in a flying airplane was unique and memorable.
Tilak booked a plane for twelve hours. Flying high through the clouds, we celebrated our honeymoon.
It was a fantastic experience, especially when the plane passed through misty clouds. Looking out the window, we could see twinkling stars above and dazzling lights of Singapore city below us. Everything was beautiful. Everything was exciting.
“How are you feeling darling?” Tilak kissed me passionately and asked.
“Magical…everything is so magical!”
We were in each other’s arms.
The plane was flying high…very high.
I was going crazy.
I had never dreamt of such pleasure. Not just were my dreams coming true but this was way more than I had expected. It was like Arabian Night or sex on a flying carpet high above the city sparkling like a jewel of lights below. It had a kinky feeling to it as if doing sex in the open or outdoor, where fear of being caught or exposed only add up to the excitement. This happiness & thrill was far beyond my wildest dreams. To be rich is wonderful! And I was determined to stay rich for the rest of my life, come what may. No price was big enough to pay for it. Only time would tell me how skewed was my way of thinking. Sometimes the price of our dreams is higher than we can afford to pay.
I held Tilak in a tight embrace. I did not want to let go. My hug was like my firm intention of making him mine forever. He was my goldmine and there was no way I was going to lose him.
“Tilak,” I closed my eyes in pleasure and said, “I will really never forget these moments…never!”
He caressed my silky hair and smiled at me.
Then he pressed his lips to mine and sparked a wave of electricity in my body.
I pressed myself hard against his body. His hand was busy exploring me. His closeness was getting adorably harsh with every passing moment. He was crushing me. I just wanted to be crushed.
●
My life was overflowing with happiness but soon a storm entered roaring into my life.
It was evening. Tilak and I were having dinner. I was dressed in a sea-blue gown with a slit from ankles to knee and was wearing a glittering necklace of expensive Japanese Akoya Pearls, which made me look like a Princess. The streak of brown hair gave me a contemporary, yet sensuous look. It was a spacious hall. There were other couples around us. Every table had a burning candle. It was a candlelight-dinner evening. The atmosphere was romantic. No noise, no loud chitchat! There was absolute, pleasant peace in that hall. Couples at tables were indulging in a leisurely dinner. The soft conversation between them was hardly audible. It was a perfect setting for a dinner where one could have food in a romantic ambiance. Tilak’s hand constantly slipped on my thigh beneath the table and I unhesitatingly returned the favour to excite him.
I saw that Kartar Singh was also in the hall. He was sitting alone at a table far away from us. He was drinking and staring at me. Ever since we had come to the resort, I noticed that Kartar Singh was keenly watching me every time I was around. And the way he looked at me, I was terrified.
That evening my heart skipped a beat when Kartar Singh stood up and started walking towards our table. I prayed that he was going somewhere else but he was not.
He stopped at our table.
“Sat Shri Akaal Ji!”
“Sat Shri Akaal!”
We stopped eating.
He was so much drunk that it was difficult for him to even stand. Yet he was trying to be as serious as possible.
“Agar Tussi bura na mano…can I ask you something?” he said. He was still staring at me when he said that. I did not like that.
“What do you want to ask?” Tilak said.
“Ever since I have seen this madam, I have been thinking…reh-rehkar ek khyaal aanda hai mere dimaag wich…”
“What?”
“Mainu eve lagta hai baadshaho…I have met her somewhere. I know her.”
My heart started to beat uncontrollably. It was as if a coiled up and dormant snake had come to life and was slowly raising its hood .
Tilak looked questioningly at me. I shrugged.
“Where have you met me?” I asked. My throat was drying fast.
“May be…Mumbai wich.”
“Where in Mumbai?” I tried to moisten my dry lips and asked.
“That is what I don’t remember, madam,” Sardar shook his head and replied. “I used to have such a good memory…lekin hun WaheGuru di meher…I don’t remember things very well now. Can you help me remember?”
“I wish I could but I don’t remember you,” I clearly said. “I think I have seen you here for the first time in my life.”
“Oh! Then I must be really drunk. I am sorry. Sorry!”
“Never mind,” Tilak said.
“Oye…really yaar. Sorry!”
“It’s really all right.”
Kartar Singh returned to his table. Just the way he had stumbled his way to ours, he returned to his. His drinking continued after that.
His eyes were still scanning me and his mind fighting hard to remember.
I was shaking badly.
I had remembered him. As soon as I heard his voice when he was talking to us, it had all come back to me.
Sardar Kartar Singh!
How could I forget?
That strong well built Sardar was once a regular customer of the nightclub. At least twice a week he used to come in and I was his first choice.
Sardar was really sexy.
He used to book me at least for nine-ten hours and used to have sex at least three times. Every time he would use a different style. I liked it. He had so many positions that even I used to be surprised. He had strong legs especially thighs.
“Sardar…what do you eat?” I used to stroke his thighs and ask.
“Oye kudiye…This Sardar feasts on spicy and sexy babes like you.” He would laugh loudly.
Kartar Singh was known to be a fun loving guy.
He used to laugh a lot. Fun and happiness were in his blood.
And now…he was a picture of sadness. In fact, anybody who looked at him now would have doubted if the Sardar had ever smiled in life.
●
Anyway, I was terrified because of Sardar Kartar Singh.
This was a new problem for me.
I spent the entire nig
ht worrying about it.
I knew that Sardar was intoxicated badly. He was in grief; still mourning his dead wife. But sooner or later, I feared that he would come to senses; and then he would easily remember me.
And who was I?
Nothing!
What if he revealed my reality before Tilak? It would mean the end for me.
This thought terrified me.
I would tremble and dread the day Tilak would know my reality. How would he react! I could not even dare imagine.
The clock was ticking towards midnight and we were in our room. The day had been tiresome after a lot of outing. We were tired and trying to sleep.
Someone knocked on the door.
We startled.
“At this hour?” we wondered.
I tried to get up.
“You don’t have to get up,” Tilak said. “I will check it out.”
He straightened his silk night robe and went to answer the door. It was bellboy of the hotel.
“Good evening sir…phone call for you from Mumbai…if you please…”
“Phone!” Tilak was surprised.
It puzzled me too.
“You stay here Shinaya,” Tilak turned to me and said hurriedly. “I will take that call and come back.”
Tilak rushed outside with unusual urgency.
I kept lying on the bed thinking who that might be.
A call from Mumbai.
So late?
Something was wrong.
That feeling of I am missing something came back to haunt me. My heart stopped its normal rhythm and quickened its rate.
Tilak returned after fifteen minutes. He was clearly disturbed. He was sweating. I had not seen him so much worried in many days.
I got off the bed and walked towards him.
“What’s the matter?” I asked. “Who was that?”
“Nobody. You just relax. Why don’t you go back to bed?”
“Why are you upset so much suddenly?”
“No, I am not.” Tilak forced a smile and said. “Really, I am fine.”
Then he wiped his forehead.
“Trust me, sweetheart,” he caressed my cheeks and said, “there is nothing to worry about.”
He lied down on the bed.
I returned to bed too.
But the tension on his face was still there. I could see that.