“We should take our leave now and let you rest,” Lady Newfield said firmly, rising from her chair and coming to stand by Julianna, who hastily got to her feet, her tea cooling and forgotten in her cup. “When do you next intend to step out into society?”
Lord Altringham rose also and frowned. “I believe I am to attend Lady Marroway’s ball tomorrow evening,” he said, looking at Julianna keenly. “Will you also be in attendance, Miss Sussex?”
She nodded. “Yes, I believe so,” she answered, still feeling a myriad of confusion over what she had heard from Lord Altringham and all that she now felt. “I would be glad to speak to you there.”
He looked so relieved that she could not help but smile. “I would be most grateful for your company,” he told her, making a small glow begin to burn in her heart. “After all, Miss Sussex, it seems as though you have saved me twice from the danger that would have befallen me.”
Shaking her head, Julianna did not accept such an accolade. “I hardly think so, Lord Altringham.”
“Regardless,” he said firmly, “I am sure I will be a good deal more at ease in your company tomorrow, Miss Sussex, than I would be on my own.”
Finding herself rather warmed by this remark, Julianna quickly took her leave, wished him well, and hurried out after her grandmother, feeling herself both conflicted and delighted in equal measure.
“I could tell that you were considering speaking to Lord Altringham about the truth of your identity, Julianna,” Lady Newfield said sternly. “I am sorry to have interrupted your intentions, but I cannot in good conscience allow you to do so.”
“Why ever not?” Julianna asked as they walked along the street together, with Lady Newfield’s arm linked through hers. “Is there something wrong?”
Lady Newfield hesitated, looking at her for a moment before turning her face back to the pavement. “Because Lord Altringham might not be as genuine as he appears,” she said carefully. “He may very well be eager in his intentions at present, but if a pretty young lady were to cross his path, bat her eyelashes at him, and offer him something he might very much like to accept, then he may find his resolve rather weakened.”
Julianna let out a sigh, realizing that her grandmother was correct and yet finding a desire still within her to tell Lord Altringham the truth. “I must hope that he is more aware of himself than that.”
“Then allow him to prove it,” Lady Newfield said gently. “And then speak to him of your true identity if you wish. I fear that if you tell him now, you will arouse his anger and his distrust. However, if he proves himself to be determined and decisive in his new way of conducting himself, then I would hope that you might gain a little more understanding from him in that quarter.” She smiled at Julianna, who could not help but admit that she understood the point her grandmother was making. “A gentleman who has thought to turn his back on past behavior only to succumb to it again will not be inclined to listen to the reasons for your secrecy. Whereas a gentleman who is aware of his behavior and now considers it to be abhorrent and something to regret will be much more inclined to listen and understand.”
“That makes sense, Grandmama,” Julianna answered heavily. “Although I must hope that someone does not succeed in their attempt to kill him before that time comes!” She winced. “Not that I wish him dead at all.”
Lady Newfield linked her arm through Julianna’s. “You need not worry, my dear,” she said encouragingly. “It may be that, in this disastrous and difficult situation, both you and Lord Altringham will find yourselves moving toward each other all the more, to the point where he will be delighted and relieved to learn that you are, in fact, his wife.” She squeezed Julianna’s arm lightly. “And you yourself have developed in courage, strength, and determination, my dear, and that has been quite wonderful to see.”
“Thank you, Grandmama,” Julianna murmured as they came to Lady Newfield’s townhouse. “Let us just hope that Lord Altringham thinks it to be just as wonderful when he discovers the truth.”
Chapter Eight
The ball was in full swing by the time Thomas arrived. He had decided to linger at home for a little longer than usual, telling himself that he was being wise rather than afraid of what might be waiting for him.
Stepping inside, having greeted his hostess, Thomas looked out across the room and felt his stomach tighten. Was there someone here eager to take his life? Someone here who was disappointed to see him standing with the best of the beau monde, disappointed that the bullet had not found its way into his heart?
Suppressing a shudder, Thomas walked into the crowd of guests, telling himself that there was no need for him to be afraid in such a setting. It was as Miss Sussex had said. No one would attempt to steal his life from him here in such a public setting, for fear of being seen and caught.
Clearing his throat, he stepped forward and set his shoulders, trying his best to be just as calm and as collected as usual. There were the usual ladies smiling at him and batting their eyelashes, but tonight was the first time he did not find himself reacting to them in the same way. Instead of feeling a flush of delight, he found himself barely able to return their smiles, wondering instead if their posturing hid a snare. Were any of them responsible for the theft of his diamonds? Or capable of shooting a pistol?
“You look a little tense this evening, Altringham.”
Thomas stumbled as someone caught his arm. He whirled around on instinct, his hands raised for fear that someone would attack him, only to see Lord Fairfax frowning hard at him.
“Fairfax,” he breathed hoarsely. “It is you.”
“Yes,” Lord Fairfax said slowly, dragging the word out and looking at Thomas with a good deal of concern. “It is only me. Were you expecting someone else?” His eyes narrowed as he saw the way Thomas had his hands raised, making him realize that he was still standing defensively.
“My apologies,” Thomas muttered, running one hand through his hair and then immediately regretting doing so, given that he had now mussed it. “You are quite right. I am a little… tense this evening.”
Lord Fairfax raised his eyebrows. “And is that for any particular reason?”
Hesitating, Thomas considered whether or not to give him a truthful answer. “I… I have had a few difficulties of late, as you know, what with the diamonds going missing and my struggle to determine whether or not my staff are involved in any way.”
“I see,” Lord Fairfax murmured thoughtfully. “That is unfortunate. You have not found out anything about your driver?”
Thomas, who had completely forgotten about questioning his driver as to whether or not he had been involved with the robbery in any way, merely shook his head, choosing not to express this.
“And the diamonds are gone? They have not been found by anyone?”
“No,” Thomas said with a sigh. “And Lady Guthrie still does not have them which means that she and I are still, as far as she is concerned, in an agreeable situation.”
Lord Fairfax chuckled. “Then mayhap you should simply buy her some rubies and bring things to a close. Rubies are just as good as diamonds.”
Thomas snorted. “Not to Lady Guthrie. Diamonds are all she wants.” He sighed heavily and rolled his eyes. “But you are quite correct. I should find a way to bring things to a close.”
Lord Fairfax looked at him carefully, tilting his head just a little. “Are you quite certain you want to bring things to an end with Lady Guthrie?” he asked quietly. “I know it is not my business, but I did wonder whether or not this has something to do with your marriage.”
It was as though Thomas had stepped into an icy river and let the water wash over him. His marriage. He had almost entirely forgotten about these last few days, desperate to put it from his mind and forget about his bride. And he had been so successful in his endeavors that he had, in fact, managed to push all thoughts of her from his mind. He had not even thought of his bride, for his mind had been filled with the confusion of what had been occurring as well a
s his very odd feeling as regarded Miss Sussex. Just what was he doing? He could have no feelings for Miss Sussex, no considerations for her, nor could he even think of what might be in his heart should he continue his acquaintance, for he was wed now and had a wife of his own already.
But I could always…
Turning a little away from Lord Fairfax, Thomas shook his head. He knew full well that he could not ask Miss Sussex to join him in anything inappropriate. She was not a lady who would be willing to do such a thing, besides which, he did not think that he would even consider asking her. Miss Sussex was not that sort of lady and he, he reminded himself, no longer wanted to be that sort of gentleman.
“You are acting very strangely tonight, Lord Altringham, I must say,” Lord Fairfax remarked loudly as Thomas swung back toward him. “You are sure there is nothing other than your diamonds and Lady Guthrie?”
“A little quieter, if you please,” Thomas hissed, not wanting the rest of the ton to overheard Lord Fairfax’s remarks. “If you insist on knowing, then I will tell you.” Taking a deep breath, he told Lord Fairfax what had happened with the attempt on his life, seeing his friend’s eyes widen.
“Gracious,” Lord Fairfax murmured, his face a little paler than before. “That is very troubling indeed. Little wonder you are so distracted this evening.” His eyes turned to something—or someone—over Thomas’ shoulder. “Now, I can see some very lovely distractions coming toward you, Altringham. I’m sure that if you let your mind fill with them, you will soon be turned from your melancholy and distressing thoughts.”
Turning, Thomas found himself smiling at Lady Darlington, Miss Marchmont, and Miss Basford, who were all smiling back at him, their eyes warm and their cheeks a little pink from the warmth of the ball. Thomas let out a long breath. Lord Fairfax might be quite correct, Thomas considered, hearing Lord Fairfax letting out a quiet chuckle as Thomas began to greet the ladies, knowing that he would be able to secure two dances from them each. That certainly would distract him from his thoughts for most of the evening!
* * *
“You do not want to take a walk with me?”
Lady Darlington looked up at him beseechingly, her eyes like warm honey as she shot him a quick but enticing smile. “It is only a short walk into the gardens,” she purred, one hand now tight on his arm, pulling him closer to her. “There are a good many hiding places where we might go, for even a few minutes.”
Thomas winced inwardly, feeling the urgent desire to do precisely as she asked, to do all that she wished, and knowing that the only reason he was choosing not to do so was simply because of his promise to Miss Sussex. He had told her that he wanted to be a very different gentleman, to turn his back on what he had done before, realizing that the consequences of his prior behavior were now coming back to hit him hard, but now that he was in the moment, standing by Lady Darlington and looking down into her beautiful eyes, he found himself less than eager to do as he had promised. Instead, he wanted to walk out into the gardens with her, to find a quiet place and steal some kisses from her.
“You cannot tell me that you are reluctant to do so again!” Lady Darlington huffed, now looking a little petulant. “Whatever is the matter, Lord Altringham? Is it that you no longer wish to accept my attentions?”
“No, no indeed,” he found himself saying with such fervor that Lady Darlington’s eyes lit up almost at once, her pouting lips curving into a smile. “You must understand, I have promised dances to other young ladies and—”
“You have time,” she said, her hands wrapped around his arm as she began to walk toward the door that led to the gardens. “And besides which, am I not more important than a silly dance or two?”
He cleared his throat, feeling himself growing more and more uncomfortable with every step he took. “Yes, of course you are,” he said, trying to speak as warmly as he could. “But still, I should not like to upset any of the other ladies I am promised to.”
Lady Darlington laughed and patted his arm. “We shall be very quick indeed,” she smiled, leaning into him all the more. “But I promise you, you will not regret spending a little bit of time with me.”
It was a very strange sensation to feel oneself battling between what one wanted to do and what one knew he ought to do, Thomas considered as he was led out of the ballroom by Lady Darlington. There was so much that she had to offer him but the pleasure would be only fleeting, only temporary. He winced as Lady Darlington laughed and pressed his arm again, feeling the pain in his shoulder and recalling, with cold, hard clarity, precisely why he was not to step out of the ballroom.
But it was by now much too late. The door was behind him, the darkness already swallowing both himself and Lady Darlington up.
“Wait.”
Lady Darlington turned her face to his, staring at him as he stood there, frozen. Her face was flickering in the shadows of the lanterns that had been hung along the garden path and he could see both the astonishment and the impatience in her eyes.
“I am sorry, Lady Darlington,” he said, stammering. “I— ”
Lady Darlington tossed her head, threw up her hands, and spun on her heel. “I am being spurned again, it seems!” she exclaimed, drawing attention from the other guests. “Good gracious, Lord Altringham, what is it I must do for you to remain with me a little longer?”
Thomas found himself taking a few steps forward, thinking to go after her, only to force himself to come to a stop. There was no need to go after her now, not when he had already made his decision. Yes, she would be upset with him but he could not continue giving in to what she offered, not when he had resolved to change his ways.
Sighing, he turned around and meandered back slowly along the path toward the ballroom. The music no longer seemed to swirl around the air, filled with joy and happiness. The laughter of the guests burned his skin, making him wince as he closed his eyes tightly for a moment. What was happening to him? It was all very strange indeed and he was not at all certain what he was feeling, what was going on within him, and what he ought to do next.
Something hard hit him on the side of the head. He fell sideways, grunting as he did so. Someone was standing near him, and Thomas lifted his hand hopelessly toward his head as a dark figure, clothed in shadow, leaned over him.
“You are unworthy.” It was a hiss, a whisper, a breath on the wind. And then it was gone.
And then, a scream rent the air. The shadow was gone and Thomas groaned aloud again, unable to even stand. His head was throbbing and he could feel something warm trickle down the side of his face. What had happened to him?
“Lord Altringham! Lord Altringham!” Lady Darlington exclaimed, having evidently seen what had happened, her voice almost a scream as she leaned over him. “Are you all right?”
He groaned again and tried to push himself up. Lady Darlington stumbled back as some others came near him.
“Get a footman or two,” someone commanded. “Whatever happened to you, Lord Altringham?”
“I do not know,” Thomas muttered, his head aching all the more as he tried to stand. He felt himself swaying terribly and was grateful for the gentlemen who came to stand by him, helping him to stay upright.
“You are bleeding terribly,” said another gentleman, his voice low. “Here.” He handed him a kerchief, which Thomas attempted to press against his head, only to wince as the pain in his head doubled. “Did you fall against something?”
Thomas tried to shake his head but gritted his teeth in pain. “No, I did not,” he said tightly. “I was struck.”
“By what?”
“By whom?” someone else asked, but Thomas could not answer, his head buzzing furiously.
“Good gracious! Is that Altringham?”
Hearing a familiar voice, Thomas tried to make out Lord Fairfax’s face in the shadows. Footmen had come to him now, helping him along the pathway.
“I am quite all right,” Thomas tried to say, but the words just came out as a mumble. He did not know where he w
as being led, could not say who was still with him or whether or not Lord Fairfax was with him also. Strong arms helped him climb some steps but no bright lights of the ballroom greeted him. Murmurs and whispers seemed to surround him as he was led into the house, with a door opened in front of him. Struggling to focus, Thomas was put into a soft chair, his head resting back against it.
“I will fetch the apothecary,” someone said, and Thomas tried to protest, to say that he did not need such a thing, but his mouth would not work in the way he wished it. Giving in to the pain and the darkness, he closed his eyes and let another groan issue from his mouth. And then he did not feel anything for what felt like a very long time indeed.
* * *
“Lord Altringham?”
The sound of a familiar voice prodded Thomas into consciousness. Someone was touching his hand, squeezing his fingers, with something cool pressed against his temple. With an almighty effort, he forced his eyes open, only to have them close again. Struggling hard, he tried to open his eyes again and this time, succeeded in doing so.
Miss Sussex was looking directly into his face, her features fuzzy to his eyes for a short time. He tried to speak but his throat felt like gravel, hoarse and scraping.
“Lord Altringham, you have awakened. Thank goodness,” Miss Sussex breathed, grasping his hand a little more tightly. “How do you feel?”
In Search of Love: Convenient Arrangements (Book 2) Page 9