“Yes, it’s both my vocation and my hobby.” He stepped into the room and it took considerably more will than it should have for Lauren to remain standing where she was. She attributed it to her own guilty conscience more than any overtly threatening feel on his part, but the end result was the same. She wanted to throw up.
She forced a smile. “An impressive collection of photos as well. Seems like you’re the one with the connections here.”
“I’ve made my share over the years.” He walked toward the desk, but stopped short of coming around to join her on the other side. For which she was eternally grateful. It was silly to still feel so…spooked, for the lack of a better word. She hadn’t broken into anything or seen anything she shouldn’t have, so despite being here uninvited, she really wasn’t doing anything wrong. Besides, it was her mother’s house, too.
She wished any of those rationalizations would help to slow her still thrumming heartbeat, but they didn’t.
“Did you ever have the desire to run for office?”
“No,” she said, taking the opportunity to return her gaze to the books and photos…and slowly ease herself along the wall of shelves and farther away from him. And his desk. “I like being behind the scenes, helping to put things in motion. Being in front never really called to me.”
“A shame.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Well, it’s not like in my generation, when women were expected to be standing behind the man, in the supporting role. These days you all step right to the front. You’re smart, educated, assertive…just seems like your party would love to have someone like you running on their ticket.”
Lauren had no idea where he was going with this, or what might be prompting it. She turned to face him. “It takes a lot of those same people to help run the offices of our elected officials. I’m more suited to that challenge.”
Arlen lifted a shoulder as if to say he didn’t really understand how anyone could not want the limelight role, but said nothing more.
“You seem to be pretty involved in politics beyond the local scope here,” she said, pointing to even more photos, these obviously more recent, hanging on the wall next to the fireplace. “Did you ever have aspirations beyond mayor of Cedar Springs?” She lifted a hand. “I meant no offense, just—”
“No, no, I understood the question. I hope you didn’t think I was insulting your chosen profession, either. I just wondered why you didn’t reach further, is all. What with all your family connections, you really have the path there for you.”
“Maybe, but just because the path is there, doesn’t mean you have to take it.” She looked back at the photos. “Do you wish you had? Taken a different path?”
“This town might not be the place I was born, but in every other way it’s my town. I take great pride in it.”
Lauren turned, still smiling. “As well you should. It’s a great little town. But did you ever think about stepping beyond the smaller, more intimate stage here, to a larger arena, where you could take your enthusiasm and direct it toward broader goals?”
“Life has a way of making its own plans while you are naively, perhaps, making your own.”
Again, she noted the dodge, but it prompted about a dozen other questions. And she wanted to ask him about her mother and why he’d been attracted to her. With all the talk of political aspirations and goals, maybe she’d get a better peek at what had instigated their initial attraction to one another.
But just then Jake stuck his head in the door. “Charlene is getting ready to serve something very chocolate that looks pretty damn amazing. I thought you might like to join us while there’s still a chance of there being anything left.”
Lauren smiled at him and caught his gaze when she moved between him and Arlen, when only she could see his face. He mouthed the words, “Sorry,” then stepped back so they could exit the room.
“No need,” she whispered as she moved past him. She wasn’t sure if he was apologizing for the intrusion or taking so long to come to her rescue. She was warmed by either thought. And exhausted by all the mental gymnastics she’d been vaulting around all afternoon and evening. What she really wanted was to have a few bites of very decadent dessert…then make up any excuse she could come up with so she and Jake could leave. And have, perhaps, a few delectable moments themselves.
Arlen paused before exiting the room, doing a quick visual cataloging of the room. His gaze snagged on the almost closed top drawer of his desk. He stepped out and closed the door. The door that was always closed, whether he was in the room or out. Which would have made it pretty damn hard for Lauren to see the shelves of books she claimed enticed her into his personal space.
He walked down the short hall, and back toward the patio, watching through the bay window as Charlene laughed at something Jake said.
Lauren moved beside her and the two served dessert with the deftness of longtime partners. They were close, those two, with the kind of bond he might not fully understand personally, but could certainly recognize. And that was despite the estrangement.
He’d have to do something about that. And, well…he’d given Lauren every opportunity to tell him, and her mother, that she was no longer working for the senator from Virginia.
What to do…what to do…And, most importantly, how to do it.
Chapter 13
Jake closed the door after climbing into his side of the Jeep. “Everything seemed to go pretty well, you think?”
Lauren settled into her side of the front seat and reached for her seat belt. “Yes, I think we all behaved like adults and played well together.”
“But?”
She flashed him a quick smile, which he returned as he backed out of his parking space. They both waved to Charlene and Arlen, who were standing beneath the extended awning off the side of the garage. Side by side, and yet, not overtly together. He hadn’t seen Arlen so much as accidentally brush against his wife all evening.
“But, I’m still not getting the greatest vibes from Arlen,” she said, still smiling as they waved. “Or my mother and Arlen, together.”
They finally turned the Jeep around and headed out to the main road back into town.
“What was your perception?” Lauren asked. “And be honest. I’m fully aware this unease I feel could just be a selfish reaction to losing my mom at the same time I’ve decided to leap from pan to fire in my professional life.”
“You haven’t lost your mom. Anyone with eyes in their head can see how close the two of you are. She might be geographically farther away from you, and you might have good reason to be concerned, but your bond is clearly there and very strong.”
He caught Lauren blinking a few times, quickly, as she looked out the side window.
“Lauren, I didn’t mean to—”
“No, no, don’t apologize. You have no idea how reassuring it is to hear that from someone with no agenda in the matter.” She looked at him then, eyes a little glassy, but chin set. “Both about our obvious closeness, and what you said about having reason to be concerned. Did they not seem very…newly wedded to you? I mean, yes, they might have been ‘sparing’ me, but there’s only so much a couple that’s supposedly in love with one another can hide or stifle.”
“Maybe it’s a generational thing,” Jake offered. He had definitely noticed the lack of both physical and spoken affection in the partnership between the mayor and his new wife. But there was also no doubt in his mind that Charlene was quite happy and content in her life there. And Arlen…well, he was just the same as he’d ever been, but he certainly hadn’t seemed unhappy or distressed. Jake had caught him watching Lauren pretty closely a few times, however. “Maybe they’re just not big into outward displays of affection.”
“My mom wasn’t like that with my dad. Or even her own father. She’s southern, she’s…naturally affectionate and generous.”
“She seemed pretty happy, though,” Jake offered. “I don’t think that was a put on, she really did seem—
”
“Content,” Lauren finished. “I know, and she is. It’s so funny, but for as close as we are, and as much as I feel I know my own mother, she really surprised me today.”
“In what way?”
“Her garden, the way she decorated the interior of the house. It was—she was—different from the woman who raised me, who I thought I knew.” She looked at Jake. “But you’re very right, she’s definitely content. She’s found this whole new self, this side of her she’d never really let herself get to know. And I honestly think she’s reveling in it and the continued discovery process.”
“Then maybe whatever the deal is between her and Arlen is worth the price of getting everything else she wants in life.”
“That’s just it, she doesn’t need Arlen to have those things.”
“Except it was through marrying him that she discovered them in the first place. Would you consider her to be traditional and old-fashioned enough to honor the marriage, regardless of what she’s discovering in her new partnership after the fact? It’s not so hard to believe that she’s chosen to look at the bright side, even if she’s regretting some part of the impulsiveness now. Or perhaps her need for companionship, or the type of companionship, is different now, at this point in her life.”
Lauren didn’t respond right away, but seemed to be thinking over his comments.
“For what it’s worth, I do think there’s a lack of…connection, or something with them. They seem very at ease around each other, and in some ways, like an older married couple who have just settled into their respective routines and no longer bother to key into one another.”
“I thought the exact same thing. Except they’ve only been together for six months.”
“I know. Which is why it was noticeable. But, perhaps, they’ve both come to realize that even if their rush to the altar might have been a little hasty, that there is value in the companionship and have settled for that. Neither of them seemed tense, or stressed, they were both quite relaxed. Even if not appearing particularly couple-like.”
“I know,” Lauren sighed. “And you’re exactly right. I thought much the same thing.”
“And yet, it’s just not feeling right to you.” He said it as more statement than fact.
“No, it’s not. Something about Arlen…” She let the sentence drift, but Jake noticed the way she rubbed at her arms. “I guess I’m just going to have to get over it. I haven’t found a single thing to prove there is any real reason my mom shouldn’t stay with him. She’s a grown woman, and as we’ve said, clearly happy with the predominant part of her life. And, apparently, okay with her partner. I wondered if maybe she was feeling she had to stay with him because of all the fuss over her elopement.”
“Would she do that? Just to save face?”
“See, that’s just it, no, the woman I know wouldn’t. So, I guess I spent the evening trying to figure out why she is sticking. Your explanation is as good a guess as any. But I don’t see any honest affection or love there.”
“You could talk to your mom about it, just to clear the air, make sure she’s really happy and okay with her current circumstances. Make sure she understands that her happiness is all you care about. It is a small town, and perhaps she’s sensitive to that, too.”
“Meaning the gossip that would ensue if she were to want a divorce so suddenly after marrying him.”
“Especially if she’d want to stay on in Cedar Springs afterward.”
Lauren nodded. “Meaning it might be the easier path to just go with the flow and keep things as they are. Especially if Arlen is open to the same arrangement, which from everything I could tell, seems plausible.”
“You should talk it over with your mom,” Jake said, reaching over to put his hand over hers. “Your heart is in the right place with this, Lauren. I’m sure she knows that. And…”
She looked over at him. “And?”
“Well, you are going to tell her about the change in your employment status at some point, right?”
Lauren sighed. “Definitely. I just haven’t figured out when. Or how. All this has turned out to be complicated, which—my fault, I know. But that doesn’t make it any easier to untangle.”
“I just think it would be better coming from you than her finding out another way. We may be a small town stuck out in the middle of nowhere, but Denver is just a few hours east and we do get national news here.”
“I’m sure my leaving the senator’s staff isn’t going to be national news. If there’d been some kind of scandal, maybe, but that wasn’t the case. I’d be surprised if it gets any mention at all beyond local comment.” She lifted her hand to stem his response. “But I do want her to know about it from me, so your point is well taken. We talked about getting together for a late lunch tomorrow, so I suppose that will be my chance.”
Jake squeezed her hand, then turned it over so he could lace his fingers between them. “So I guess any chance I had at talking you into a quick trip to Vegas—” Her look of alarm was so unexpected, he frowned, then realized what she’d assumed. He laughed. “No, no, I wasn’t going to encourage you to follow in your mother’s footsteps.” He chuckled, even as she continued to stare at him. “I’m sorry, I am. I wasn’t even thinking about that.” He held on to her hand when she went to tug it free.
“So…Vegas?” she asked, still clearly confused. And wary.
His laughter faded. “You’re really still worried, aren’t you?”
“No. Yes. I don’t know. Maybe it’s just I’ve been carrying around the concerns for so long it will take a while to shake them. Especially given I didn’t come here to discover them all happy and cozy in their little love nest.” He felt a little shudder go through her.
“A blessing in disguise, perhaps,” he said, dryly.
She nodded, then forced a smile of her own. “I should start counting those.” She looked at him. “So, what’s this about Vegas?”
Now it was his turn to sigh. “With everything going on, and maybe being a tad bit distracted by you, I forgot to tell you my schedule has changed for the next few days.” He took heart in the fact that she looked instantly disappointed. “I have to fly to Vegas tomorrow and bring back the group of guys who are going to invest in Betty Sue so I can get her race ready for next month.” He smiled and winked. “I thought maybe I could get you out of Dodge for the day and convince you to go with me.”
She smiled then. “You have no idea how tempting an offer that is. Seriously, tempting. In fact, I’m probably an idiot for not taking the out.” She turned his hand over and covered it with her other hand. “But I think I should stay here, work things through with my mom.” She glanced from their joined hands, to him. “But I’d have otherwise loved to spend the time with you, getting the chance to fly with you.”
“Speaking of which, because of having the guys in town, I won’t be able to keep our date for Sunday, but if you’re not in a big rush to leave Cedar Springs, then I’m hoping I can convince you to stick around so I can keep that date next week sometime.”
Her grin was quick. It made her eyes light up. He caught himself thinking that he could easily see going to great lengths to make that happen as often as possible.
“I think I could be persuaded to stick around for that,” she said.
“Good.” He tugged her hand closer and kissed the back of it, before sliding his hand free so he could steer them up the winding lane toward the flight school. The dark shadows of the hangars were illuminated against the night sky by the moon making its ascent overhead.
He pulled around toward the gravel lot, but slowed to a rolling stop before actually parking the Jeep. He shifted his weight and turned more toward her. “It’s getting pretty late. Why don’t we grab your bike and let me take you back down into town?”
“We could do that. I can’t say I’m all that excited about a night bike ride down a still unfamiliar path.”
He reached over and pushed back a few silky strands of hair that had escaped he
r ponytail in the evening breeze. Then found his fingertips unwilling to leave the soft, smooth feel of her cheek. He drew them down along her jawline and felt her tremble. “What would excite you?”
She trembled again as he continued his exploration and traced his fingers over her lips, down to her chin, then back up to her bottom lip, which he pressed down on, slightly, until they parted. “I—” She didn’t finish, but instead let out a little gasp as he cupped her cheek and slid his thumb a little farther into her mouth.
She bit down gently on it before pulling it in deeper.
Now it was his turn to tremble a little.
“Lauren,” he said, surprised at how gruff and raspy his voice was.
“Jake,” she said, holding his gaze so directly with her own it was impossible not to see the need there, the want.
“Stay.” It was all he could manage with his heart in his throat, and the rest of his body on fire. “Please.”
She bit down gently on the pad of his thumb, then covered his hand with her own, withdrawing his thumb, but keeping his palm against her cheek. “I told you I wasn’t leaving, at least until—”
He searched her eyes intently, and went for broke. “Tonight.” He didn’t know how much time they had, but he sure as hell was going to grab every second of it he could and hold on tight. And damn if he’d apologize for it.
Her eyes flared, and her fingers tightened reflexively against the back of his hand. “Here?”
He nodded. “I want what I want, Lauren. And I think I’ve made it clear what I want is you. If it’s a no tonight, I’ll wait until it’s a yes, but you should know, I’m going to push. You’ve got some big life decisions to make…and I’m going to do what I can to make sure I’m part of them.”
Her eyes were dark and the intensity between them was palpable. So it only served to jack him up even higher when she smiled, brightly, boldly, in the midst of all the uncertainty swirling between them.
“Pushing is good.” She leaned forward, pulling him toward her. “Makes it easier for me to say yes.”
A Great Kisser Page 21