by EJ Everette
“Ms. Marshall,” she says as I approach. Her tone suggests she isn’t a fan of my name, like my father’s name holds some sort of deeper meaning that makes her physically nauseous or something.
“Ms…” I trail off. Do I call her Petra? I haven’t really addressed her have I? Shit.
“You may call me Petra,” she nods once, as if granting me some supreme privilege while answering the question warring in my head. Okay then, not weird at all.
“Good morning, Petra,” I manage.
“If you will join me in the car, we have quite a bit of work to get done today before our brunch.” She runs her eyes over my clothes, dark slacks that fall loose around my legs with a deep burgundy top that buttons halfway down the front. I had found it when Le and I went shopping and grabbed it because it was not only cute but also a good deal. My dark wavy locks are braided into a crown around my head, a look that made me laugh like a psychotic person for a few moments when I looked at the finished product in the mirror. Because I’m a princess. Petra seems to approve of my attire, thankfully, because I can’t exactly borrow clothes from my best friend who is half my size. She gestures to the door the driver is holding open to the back seat.
“Where are we going?” I ask after she joins me in the back and the driver returns to his seat, backing us out of the driveway. After a brief moment, a small not-quite painful sensation pulls at my chest before subsiding a few breaths later. We must have pulled ahead of Chance for a bit there. I noticed that, as long as one of the guys is near me, the feeling of being separated from them all barely registers but if I get too far away from whoever is watching me, it returns. I imagine too much separation would end up being much more uncomfortable, but so far whoever is with me has done a pretty good job of staying close. Even last night, when Finn and I had a little impromptu date night, I could feel Mitch close by the entire time. Talk about a mood killer, but thankfully Finn is distracting and after a while I hardly noticed. I definitely felt when Chance arrived, my body becoming more attuned to him these past few days as he stands guard the most. I would say something, but their presence is oddly comforting with so much unknown to me still. I will address it with them soon, once I decide I am ready to face them again.
“We have to get matters settled for you and Charlie, dissolve your enrollment, and finalize your grandmother’s last will,” Petra says, pulling me back to where I sit in the car with her. Her posture isn’t as straight as I would have imagined and I don’t know if that is because of her age or because she isn’t as hard as I perceive her to be. It sounds like she has a day full of paperwork planned for me. Joy. I just hope she keeps her end of the deal and explains all of this unknown. Yesterday was wonderful. I enjoyed seeing Tanner, meeting Finn’s family, and even messing with his sisters until I finally won our little game and Daisy lost her shit at me when I proved I could tell them apart. My date night with Finn had been exactly what I needed to escape my mess for just a few hours, laughter and butterflies taking over my night. Still, the entire time I was with them my mind replayed pieces of the night before. The ring I still had on my finger, the birth certificate with my parents’ names, my real name, the letter from Mom...
Gianna and her people know the truth. They will guide you until you are ready.
Petra was one of Grams’ people, right? She had said so. That means she should know what’s going on with me and be able to tell me more about my Grams, my Mom, my Dad, and who I really am.
The first stop we make is to a tall corporate building downtown. Petra and I are assisted out of the backseat by the driver whose name I should definitely commit to memory if this is going to be a frequent thing. Otherwise it all just feels too weird. We spend hours talking with lawyers about Grams’ estate and I am incredibly grateful for Petra at the moment because I do not understand most of what is being discussed. She pushes papers over to me to sign and I do, not bothering to ask what they mean. Once again, I am blindly trusting someone I do not know based on some sort of messed up feelings inside of me, yet I cannot convince myself it’s wrong for me to do so. She was in the flashback of Mom and Grams. She was in the photos on the lady’s wall at the shop. Grams trusted her, so I guess that means I do too.
Petra shakes hands with the other lawyers and we leave the eighth floor, heading back to the car which is parked out front, driver what's-his-name already holding the door for us. How did he even know we were coming? I didn’t see Petra with a phone at any point. Does she have some sort of telepathic link to him or does he just stay in that position for however long it takes her at each location so he is always ready? With my mind stuck on the driver’s insane abilities to know when his passengers need him and not on where we are going, my breath hitches a bit when I realize we have pulled up to the school moments later.
“Why are we here?” I haven’t been back since the night of the fire. I thought we would handle all the school crap at the board of education office or something so I didn't have to come back here. I am way behind for sure. This is NOT going to go well.
“I told you earlier, we must disenroll you in this pathetic excuse for an education program.” She waves her hand dismissively as if school shouldn’t be bothered with in general or something. I knew I liked her! Still, I am not sure why I am getting a free pass until she reminds me of one of the most important discoveries my late night exploration had unearthed.
“Grayelle, you are nearly twenty years old. You should never have been in this ridiculous school anyway, but the cover worked best and I understand why they voted for it despite my rebuttals. You can schedule the necessary examinations to meet your schooling requirements but you will not be returning back to this or any other high school. You have far more important matters to focus on with your time than astronomy and geometry, trust me.”
Fuck. She is right. According to my real birth certificate, I was going to be turning twenty this December, not eighteen. That’s not all. When she called me Grayelle, I almost shit a brick. Another lie. My name isn’t even Gray. Not really. This was about to be a long ass emotional day.
“Can you just call me Gray, please,” I whisper out. I can accept that there are some things I need to embrace, and I will. But right now I need normalcy whenever I can get it to keep sane.
“Of course, though you should not fear your truth, child. You are meant for a great many things and there is power in your name.” Her eyes sort of glow for a brief second, so quickly I am not sure I even saw it, before she smiles, patting my hand before the driver man opens the door. Again, Petra takes the lead once we are in the school, speaking with the principal and Ms. Sanders who joins us, sitting next to me in yet another show of support. Her, I will miss.
Following at least two hours of paperwork and discussion ending with me gathering the very sparse belongings I still have at the school to bring back with me, we stop at two different banks to finalize some of the financial details of Grams’ will and then head to brunch. I have no fucking clue how Petra does this kind of stuff all day everyday because I am already beyond exhausted and it is only just now noon. I feel like the time of day definitely makes this more of a lunch than a brunch, but what do I know. The little cafe she has chosen has outdoor seating, like basically everything near the bay, and we find a small table for two in the back corner under a pretty yellow and blue umbrella. Petra and I order our drinks and she informs me to pick whatever I’d like from the menu as she is treating today so I order a delicious sounding club sandwich with homemade dressing and a fruit bowl. I was super close to ordering the breakfast deluxe burrito, but figured I’d at least try to be civilized.
Once our food is dropped off, my hands begin to sweat, the reality of what comes next overwhelming me. Answers. She is going to give me answers. I want them, right? Yes. I do. I really need them and things like this are better to just get over with. Rip it off. Like a bandaid. A bandaid holding all of my life’s beliefs about who and what I am. Fuck. Suddenly the large meal before me seems far less appetizin
g, my stomach recoiling while twisting into knots I am not sure will ever come undone.
“I was still a young girl the first time I laid eyes on Keilitara.” Petra’s eyes are directed at some unknown object in the distance, a glaze over them as she speaks gently, fondly, of my mother.
“We were in a clearing we have often used for many of our rituals. I will show you one day as you are welcome and expected among us. Gianna and I were gathering supplies for a cleansing designed to bring peace to our family while we gathered when a gorgeous fire of a woman stepped onto the field seemingly out of nowhere. Her long dark wavy hair, so much like your own, fell nearly to her legs, her pale green eyes matched the hue of the meadow we stood in. She wore a long white dress with small intricate designs etched into the sleeves and bodice. She was regal in her presence, captivating us all immediately. The entire coven stopped what they were doing to stare.”
My eyes are already close to spilling tears as I listen to her describe my mom just like I remember her. So beautiful and strong. My chest aches, a deep pain that cannot ever be eased, from her loss. I miss her so much. She should be here with me explaining all of this. Grams should be here, too.
“The princess spoke to us about her life. She told us of the realms and their purpose. Do you know anything of the realms yet, child?” Caught in my grief, it takes a moment before I realize she has asked me a question. The realms. Do I explain the guys to her? What they have already told me? I just assumed no one could ever know what they had revealed but Petra knows the truth about my mom. Is that the same? Unable to respond with anything more, I nod my head to her in acknowledgment. Surprisingly, she doesn’t question my knowledge. Instead, she smiles, returning my nod.
“Ah, yes. Your guardians. I imagine they were quite eager to discuss your true purpose with you after the igniting.” Her eyes add a hint of mirth to her smile that wasn’t there before, like she is keeping the best secret behind them, yet she reveals nothing else about it. “So you are aware of who you are and your destiny, then?” I nod, again.
“Good. I imagine their knowledge is far more extensive than my own anyhow.” Her expression changes suddenly, as if admitting this out loud caused her pain, but she quickly schools her features and continues.
“Keilitara visited us many times after that. Each time she arrived we were in the clearing and each time she looked as if she had not aged a day while years had gone by for us here in our realm. On her third or fourth sojourn, she sat with us around the fire and told us of the prophecy. By then your grandmother and I were in our early forties and had earned spots within our coven as priestesses with high favor. One day we will discuss our family so that you are much better acquainted with our practices but for today we will focus on your future by revisiting your past.”
The waitress came over just then to ask about our meals making me realize I had yet to take a bite of my sandwich. The look on Petra’s face told me she was not pleased with my lack of appetite. Despite my nerves, I took a bite of my meal, almost robotic in nature, tasting nothing, to please her. After the server walked away again, she continued, though her eyes were focused on me and my food this time ensuring I ate.
“I had just turned fifty-five when your mother arrived pregnant with you. Gianna and I performed blessings for you both but we could tell she was afraid. In all the years she had come to us, I had never seen anything but strength and light in her. During this time with us, however, sadness and fear warred within her. She told us nothing of your father, your real father, only that she would be returning again much sooner than previous times, this time with you. She made arrangements to stay with Gianna upon her return, then she disappeared. It was only a few years later when she returned late one evening. Gia came for me and we set about laying shields around your grandmother’s home, wards of protection and secrecy. Keilitara had told us she must ensure you would never be found which is why she settled on Deeter for her escape. She had found us and trusted us with her life and yours. You were but a young thing, less than a year old at the time, but already we could feel the power you held. So much like your mother,” she trails off.
“What was she running from? I don’t understand.” My breath is shallow, fear for my mother’s safety, sadness at her life, and guilt for being the cause of her pain are my only companions as I sit in the sun outside a cafe like everything in the world is simple and safe.
Petra’s eyes are wet with unshed tears, seriously fucking with my own ability to keep my emotions in at the moment. Before I can react, she moves her soft wrinkled hand to place it atop mine on the table.
“Gray. Child. Your mother loved you immensely. Everything she did was because of that love. That fire she had within her is so perfectly reflected in you. She would have done any and everything in her power to protect you. She knew what the prophecy meant for you and wanted nothing more than to shield you from it. Hide you from what is to come. She ran to prevent you from a destiny you cannot truly avoid, though it didn’t stop her from trying. She knew her decisions would most likely be for nothing, but she had to try, you see. She had to. She loved you more than the life she had led for centuries before your birth. More than the man who held her heart. More than anything else in this realm or any other. Everything she did was for a richer, stronger love. Her love for you. Even now, in my old age, I have never experienced something so fierce. So beautiful.”
For me. She had left her home for me. She had left my father, her family, her life. All to protect me. No one had ever loved me like that. I sure as hell didn’t deserve it. I was nothing. No one. I wasn’t strong. I wasn’t fierce like Petra says my mother was. She should have been the one to live. She should have left me to whatever came. It wasn’t fair.
Petra’s hand squeezes mine, gently. It takes a great deal of effort to raise my eyes to meet hers.
“She regrets none of it, child.”
“But,” I whisper, my voice weak, “how can you know that?”
“Sweet girl. No one ever regrets what they do for the person who means the most to them in this life. No sacrifice will ever be too great when love is involved. Trust me. You are young yet, but one day soon, you will understand exactly why she did what she did and how I know she did it with joy in her heart.”
We sit for minutes, maybe longer, in silence. Her hand stays on mine and though we have only just met I find comfort in her touch. Emotions that will likely take much longer and more focus to comprehend battle within my heart and mind. I still have so many questions for Petra. So much I need to know, to understand, but I honestly don’t think I can take much more in right now. Still, there is one thing that has been at the forefront of my mind this entire time.
“You… you said you are part of a coven. That my Grams was, too. Well, the woman who I was raised to believe is my Grams. That my mom trusted you and your family to take care of me. Why? What does that mean, exactly?”
A soft smile forms on her face, her eyes once again glowing like they had in the car though this time they don’t immediately flicker back to normal. I gasp in shock and her sweet smile shifts into a smirk of satisfaction.
“Why, Gray. I would have thought you had figured it out by now. Still, you are under a great deal of stress with many new revelations laid at your feet in such a short time. Gianna and I were raised as members of the West Coven of Light. A coven I am now a high priestess of following your grandmother’s passing. A coven, my dear, of witches who hold power you can only imagine. A coven you are rightfully a member of as the daughter of Keilitara and princess of the realms, though you are not a witch yourself.”
I blink up at her when she finishes. Can my mind take any more shocking news at this point? I think the fuck not! First gods and goddesses, realms and powers, then princesses and prophecies. Now, witches.
What could possibly be next? And do I even want to know the answer to that question?
16
Gray
Words fail me as I stand next to Charlie in front of the pla
ce we called home for the last three years. What is left of it, that is.
Grams’ adorable little house with its mauve carpets, garden boxes on the front porch, and furniture from the 1980s sits in no more than rubble before us. Leanne told me a cleaning crew had come to gather most of what remained and did their best to salvage whatever they could, but that fire had burned so hot nothing had survived it. During my lunch with Petra today, after the atomic bomb she dropped on me, she informed me the fire investigators were almost certain the fire had been started by someone with how intensely it had flamed, but they had yet to find the source of the destruction. It didn’t really matter to me as much as I thought it would, though. A part of me wanted to know, needed to know how and why, but it was such a small insignificant part.
The answers wouldn’t bring Grams back to us.
I let Charlie wander, though never far from my sight, knowing he would end up going straight for the treehouse. When we arrived, he stood with me for a moment, silently taking in the destruction, before walking away without a word. Pain grabs a tight hold of my chest as I watch him, wanting so badly to comfort him but knowing I have nothing to offer him and that my own demons are close to the surface, too.
Why didn’t you tell me? Why did you let me believe she was killed in a car crash instead of murdered by some evil force? How could you let my father walk away from us? Let us be tortured and treated like absolute shit for years in a system that couldn’t possibly handle the truth of what takes place behind closed doors? Question after question fuel me, anger pushing through to the surface overcoming my other emotions. Grams was a witch! A high priestess according to Petra. I looked that shit up and basically it means she was the most powerful one in her coven or something like that. Why didn’t she use those powers to free us if we meant so much to her? To the coven? And what about Charlie? All Petra had told me was that he wasn’t my biological brother but honestly I don’t give a fuck. He deserved to be rescued. Even if there was some reason I had to suffer, why him? He was innocent in all of this. More than any of us, actually.