She smiles, using her fork to cut her omelet. Her body shifts from side to side happily as she eats her food. I could fucking watch her like this for hours and never get bored. She’s downright adorable. I don’t, mainly because that would be creepy as fuck. Instead, I reach for my burger and shove half of it in my mouth.
We eat in silence for a few moments until she clears her throat. Lifting my gaze up from my plate, I look into her pretty blue eyes and wait for her to speak whatever she’s got on her mind.
“What’s the real reason you’ve never tried to sleep with me?” she asks, her voice timid and if I’m not mistaken, insecure.
I don’t expect the question, at least I didn’t yet. I knew it would come, but here in a diner, eating? I shake my head with a smile on my lips. Unpredictable, incredibly sexy, and completely lovable. Those are the words that I would use to describe this woman in this moment.
“I already told you,” I say, attempting to deflect.
“I don’t believe you,” she announces.
Arching a brow, I lean back against the bench and watch her. “You don’t?”
“I don’t,” she says as she nods her head once.
I hum. “What if I told you that I’d already explained it to you. I don’t share.”
Della picks up the ketchup bottle and turns it upside down, squirting it all over her hash browns. She has a small crease between her eyes, possibly from thinking about her next words, most likely it’s from squeezing so much fucking ketchup over her potatoes that they completely disappear beneath the red condiment.
“I would tell you that I think it’s bullshit,” she simply states. My lips break out from a smirk to a full-on smile as I watch her. “Silver and Dragon don’t share, not even a little, and I’ve been with them both, so has Pinkie.”
Nodding, I agree that she has a point there. “I’m not celibate,” I say.
There’s a moment of silence, her body frozen, her fork suspended in the air as her eyes slowly lift from her plate to meet mine.
“You’re not?” she asks. “I’ve never…”
Shaking my head, I let out a breath. “I see a couple women in town. They know the rules. I. Don’t. Share.”
“But you share yourself?”
Chuckling, I shrug a shoulder. “Yeah, I guess I do.”
“Is that how this would work with us?” she asks before her eyes widen. Then she quickly finishes her thought. “If there was ever an us, that is.”
Unable to wipe the smile from my face, I watch her for a moment. “Do I look like Jaguar?” I ask.
She gulps, then shoves her fork full of food in her mouth and shakes her head, those blue eyes as wild as her long blonde hair. Reaching out, I wrap my hand around her free one.
Squeezing her fingers, I try to look at her as kindly as possible, attempting to hide what mi madre always told me was the Devil trying to fight his way through my black eyes.
“If we decide to further this between us, then we will decide on the boundaries of our relationship. We’ll come up with something that we both not only can agree on, but want. If we find that we want different things, then I’ll happily step aside and let you find your happiness.”
“You’re going to make me cry,” she whispers.
Squeezing her fingers one last time, I release my hold on her. “Eat,” I grunt.
We finish our meals in silence and I can’t help but lift my gaze to hers every few seconds to attempt to gauge her response to what we just talked about. She seems content as she finishes her food, every fucking bite.
I didn’t think it was possible, but I’m glad that she ate all of it, she needs the fuel for her doctor’s appointment and whatever else is thrown at her today.
Chapter Fourteen
DELLA
Santiago.
It fits him, then again, so does Eagle. He holds my hand, again, as we walk into the doctor’s office. I feel the same feeling in my belly when his fingers squeeze mine. It flips and flops, butterflies flitter around and I bite back my sigh of contentment.
I shouldn’t be thinking about him, at all. Not at all. Especially not in the doctor’s office for my first prenatal appointment, while I’m pregnant with someone else’s baby.
But none of that stops my mind from wandering. Then I begin to wonder. About him, about a possibility of us. About what kind of compromise we could have. What he would want a relationship to look like.
Shaking my head, I decide it’s stupid. I need to shift my focus from men, from dicks and orgasms to my baby and some kind of income. My needs, my desires, my overwhelming wants, they don’t matter anymore. This shit is about to get fucking real and my free days are numbered.
Oddly enough, I thought that it would scare the shit out of me, and some of it does, but losing my freedom to motherhood doesn’t frighten me at all. Maybe I just needed to see what giving in and giving up my life would truly be like under Jaguar’s thumb to wake my ass up.
Sure, I’m always down to fuck, my body is raging with hormones and always has been, but that compulsion that I had even two weeks ago seems to be non-existent.
My focus isn’t on sex, it isn’t on chasing my high. At least right now, while I’m here with Eagle, with Santiago, his hand in mine, his fingers threaded through mine as we wait to be seen.
“Goin’ in with you, nena,” he announces softly as we sit in the waiting room.
Turning to him, I tilt my head to the side. “You are?” I ask.
He grins. “Not missin’ a moment of this shit, mi corazon. Not a goddamn fuckin’ second.”
“Why?”
He moves a bit closer, his exhaled breath fanning my face. I sigh, parting my lips in anticipation of his mouth on mine. I want it. I can admit that much. I want his lips on mine and his tongue in my mouth.
I want to feel him surround me. That ache that I thought had dimmed, it comes roaring back to life at his close proximity, causing my breath to come out in short pants.
“This is just the beginning, Della. You know it deep down and I do too. This is the beginning of you and me, of us, of our family.”
“Santi,” I rasp.
He grunts, slipping his hand from my grasp, lifting it and wrapping his fingers loosely around the back of my neck. “Not fuckin’ around. Want you, nena. I know you ain’t ready yet for the way I do and that’s cool. I can wait for a while. But I’m not gonna be sittin’ on my thumb while I do.” He grins.
Then as smoothly as he drew me near, wrapped me in his arms, he releases me and sits back in the chair. My body immediately mourns the loss of his heat, of his closeness. The nurse opens the door and calls my name, sending ice through my veins to cool down my need.
This is it.
This is when reality is going to slam into me like a fucking freight train. Once I walk through those doors, there is no turning back. It will be real, this baby will be real. There will be no denying it, no pretending that it doesn’t exist, even though I haven’t, but this just seems so… final.
“Della,” Eagle calls.
His tone, his voice, it breaks me from my spinning mind. Lifting my eyes, my feet decide to finally move and they move toward him. He holds out his hand, his palm facing up and without a second thought, I slip my hand in his.
Again, hand-in-hand, he guides me.
I could get used to this, having him at my side. I’ve never felt like I’ve had anyone in my corner or at my side before. It’s different, new, and I really enjoy the way that it makes me feel. Almost as if I’m wanted for more than just sex, more than what I can give him and I feel like I could want him for more than an orgasm, too.
The nurse weighs me, unfortunately, then guides me toward a bathroom and instructs me on how to pee in a cup. My face heats as Eagle listens to her instructions. Granted, I shouldn’t be embarrassed, the man has seen me in a million compromising positions, but this just feels so incredibly intimate.
“Come with me and I’ll get you set up in a room, when you’re finished
just meet us over in exam room two,” the nurse offers, never once looking at me.
No, her focus is on Eagle, on his face, his neck, and his cut.
I narrow my gaze on the two of them, but he just gives me a wink and turns to follow her. She’s brunette, super thin, even in her scrubs. She reminds me of Charm, I instantly hate her, and I despise the fact that they’re going to be alone in exam room two together.
As quickly as I can, without making a mess all over myself, the floor, the toilet seat, or anything else, I pee in the cup. Waddling with my shorts around my ankles, I make my way over to the little door on the wall and as instructed, I open it and set the cup down, then hurry and wash my hands before I pull my shorts back up.
Like a madwoman, I practically sprint toward exam room two. Nurse Whore is there, her hands wrapped around the counter behind her, her back arched and tits pushed out as far as humanly possible as she smiles at Eagle.
“What’s next?” I deadpan.
She jumps, not hearing me enter, and tilts her head to the side. “Strip down to your panties, bra off, and put the dressing gown on. The doctor will be with you shortly.” Slowly, she saunters out of the room and that’s when I glance over to Eagle.
He’s got a shit-eating grin playing on his lips, but he doesn’t watch her ass as she moves. I let out a huff of air, then angrily strip down to my G-string panties. Folding my clothes neatly, I set them on the small table to Eagle’s side.
To his credit, or maybe detriment, I haven’t decided yet, he doesn’t say a single word while I throw a mini-tantrum. Once I have the ugly assed paper gown on, I hop up on the table with a loud grunt.
“You done, yet?” Eagle asks.
Sliding my eyes over to look at him, I glare. “Did you have fun chatting with Nurse Whore?” I snap.
God, jealousy. It’s such an ugly color on me, but I can’t help it. I’ve never wanted someone and not had them fall at my feet to get laid. And I want Eagle. Part of me has always wanted him, he completely intrigues me and he’s so damn quiet, so observant that I have no clue what he’s thinking.
Sure, he’s saying that he wants me, but he’s going to give me time. I don’t know that I want time, as terrible as that sounds. Especially not if that time means he’ll be fucking some chicks in town or this bitch. No way. Not without me getting what I need, too.
“Nena,” he chuckles.
“What does that mean anyway?” I ask, unable to hide the crease between my eyes.
His lips stay in the upturned grin, his eyes search my face and he shakes his head once. “Means, baby,” he explains.
“And mi corazon?”
He clears his throat and I watch as he runs the palms of his hands down his thighs as he shifts in his seat. I don’t move. My gaze stays directly focused on him. When his eyes lift to mine again, his cocky smirk has disappeared, his eyes aren’t shuttered and I can see him, all of him.
“My heart,” he whispers.
“Why?” I ask immediately.
Before he can answer, the door swings open and a doctor, plus Nurse Whore, walk through the door. The moment is gone, my question will probably never be answered, but now I know that he calls me baby and my heart. God, how fucking sexy is that?
EAGLE
The doctor asks a bunch of questions, none of which I even pretend to listen to. Instead, I scroll through my phone. I text Dragon and a couple of the other guys. Jaguar, Wolfe, Coyote, and Hawk are already gone and on their way to SoCal and TJ, thank fuck.
I’ll be glad to have Jaguar out of my fucking hair for a while. Maybe I’m just as big of a dick as he is. I’m sure what I’m doing is considered going against some bro-code, but I don’t give a shit.
I don’t consider myself in love with Della, yet, but I know that Jag isn’t either. He is obsessed with her, a suffocating obsession that in the end, will destroy the both of them and everything in their paths.
But I’m no martyr. I do want Della. I’ve wanted her. This benefits me, otherwise I would not be here with her, bringing her into my home and finding any little way that I can to tether her to me. I want all of her. Need her to want me too.
“Are you ready to see the baby?” the doctor asks.
Lifting my eyes, I look up into his excited and hopeful face. I don’t know how he can be so excited about a pregnancy, about a kid, the way he is, but I guess that’s why he got into this kind of work, because he’s genuinely excited about kids.
“I think so.” Della laughs nervously.
Shaking my head, I lean back in my chair and reach across to take her hand in mine. Giving her a small squeeze, I keep my grip on hers and keep my gaze straight ahead. I can feel her eyes on me, but as soon as the doctor clears his throat, her body jerks and I know that she’s facing him.
“We’ll go on over to the next room, that’s where the ultrasound machine is located. Go ahead and slide on your shoes and we’ll head on over.”
I frown, wondering why he didn’t tell her to put some fucking clothes on, but I decide not to be confrontational, at least not here. Standing, I help Della down off of the exam table and walk closely behind her as she follows the doctor toward the next room.
Once we’re inside, she climbs up on another exam table. The doctor points to a couple of chairs that are pushed up against the wall and instructs me to have a seat while he fiddles with a machine.
“Della, go ahead and put your legs in the stirrups,” he instructs.
Shifting my gaze from the floor, I frown at the sight of her with her legs suspended in the air. Without another word, the doctor slides a condom down a piece of white plastic then rubs some clear liquid on it before he slips it inside of Della.
My eyes widen and I know my lips part in surprise at what has just happened in front of me. I don’t know where to look, but when my eyes find Della’s, she’s smirking and looks like she’s trying to hold in her laughter.
“Mom and dad?” the doctor calls out.
My heart stops beating in my chest at his calling me that word—dad. Holy fuck. Shifting my gaze over to him, I blink at the screen he’s pointing to. He goes about explaining what’s what, then he shows me the heart rate on the screen, the speed it’s moving.
“Everything looks really good,” he murmurs as he touches some keys on his computer. “You’re measuring about ten weeks pregnant right now. So, I’ll want to see you back in four weeks. But otherwise, keep doing what you’re doing and don’t forget to get some prenatal vitamins like we talked about…”
His words fade away as I stare at the screen, the blob in front of me, a baby. I knew Della was pregnant, I’ve known that she was pregnant. I can see her body changing what seems like every single day. But none of it really sank in deep until this exact moment.
Della sits up and follows the doctor out of the room, but I don’t move. I’m staring straight ahead, now at only a blank screen. My lips twitch into a smile. Mine. They’re both going to be mine. I can’t fucking wait to see what the future holds for me, but I know without a doubt that the future will be us together with this child.
“Santiago?” Della calls out softly.
My head moves faster than I intend and I have to wrap my hand around the back of my neck as a sharp pain slices through me. She’s smiling over at me, her shoulder leaning against the doorjamb and her eyes dancing as she takes me in.
“I’m done,” she murmurs.
Gulping, I stand up and let out a heavy breath as I make my way toward her. Without a word, I reach for her waist and tug her off of the door and pull her against me. Dipping my chin, I touch my mouth to hers. I don’t fill her with my tongue the way that I want, instead I pull away and look down into her bright blue eyes.
“Santiago?”
Smirking, I continue to search her gaze with my own. “Marry me, Della.”
“What?” she breathes.
“Marry me.”
I watch as she blinks, her lips part and she shakes her head. “Santiago…” she begins but does
n’t finish it, probably because she can’t, but also because I interrupt her.
“Don’t do it because you’re running from Jaguar. Do it because you want to be with me. I’ll take care of you, Della, both of you. I want that baby and I want you. Both of you. You’re mine, always have been, we just didn’t fuckin’ know it yet.”
“We are?”
My lips twitch into a smile. “We are. Don’t you feel it?”
She looks to the side, her teeth sinking into her bottom lip, then brings her gaze back to meet my own. “I don’t know exactly what I feel when I look at you, when I’m around you. You’re so different from all of the others, and yet, you’re exactly like them, aren’t you?”
“Controlling, possessive, mean, cruel, murderous?” I ask.
Her lips twitch into her own smile and she shrugs one shoulder, obviously agreeing with me, with my assessment of how she looks at all of the Savage Beast men. Dipping my chin, I touch my lips to the tip of her nose.
“Not that controlling, nena,” I mutter.
“The rest?” she asks on a whisper.
“Oh, I’m all of those things, but maybe not in a conventional way. Not the way other Beasts are those things,” I admit, straightening my spine, my eyes never leaving hers.
“Are you going to tell me?” she asks, arching a brow as her eyes search mine.
Smirking, I shake my head. “Not in this doctor’s office and not before I’ve had you in my bed,” I state as I release her and walk past her and into the hallway.
Turning around, I hold out my hand for her to take. She slips her palm in mine and together we walk out of the doctor’s office. In just four week’s time we’ll be back and hopefully, by then, married.
At least I fucking hope that’s how this shit plays out because I can’t brand her while she’s knocked up, and if I know Jaguar, he’s going to try and get his ass back here as soon as humanly fucking possible to claim her.
Chapter Fifteen
DELLA
UNLEASH ME: SAVAGE BEAST MC 4 Page 13