by C. J. Miller
“Trevor, we are doing everything we can,” Gemma said, rising to her feet.
They needed to put those words on the clinic’s voice mail and website. They were trying. They were working on it.
“It’s getting scary,” Trevor said. “I have a little girl and one on the way. I can’t leave this town and I am not bringing Gabriella to the clinic to have her baby.”
Rafe saw the man for who he was: a scared father. Not a jerk. “I’ll come to you when the time comes for your wife to have her baby.”
Trevor looked between Gemma and Rafe. “You’re the new doc.”
“New to the clinic. I grew up in Dead River,” Rafe said.
Trevor’s shoulders relaxed. “Gabriella hasn’t been seen by her obstetrician in too long. She said she knows everything is fine. I don’t agree. A phone conversation doesn’t cut it.”
Rafe’s schedule was jammed, but people needed routine medical care. That part of the clinic’s services were lacking with so much time and resources going toward the effort to find a cure for the virus. “Why don’t you call the clinic tomorrow and I’ll set up a time to see your wife somewhere that you’re comfortable?”
“Are you an obstetrician?” Trevor asked, setting his hands on his hips.
Rafe had some experience in obstetrics, but it wasn’t his field of expertise. “I work in emergency medicine. I’ve delivered enough babies to know what I’m doing.” Most of the deliveries he’d performed were when the mother couldn’t make it to the labor and delivery room. He’d been trained to help people and perform whatever tasks were needed. If he needed to reassure a pregnant woman she and her baby were healthy, he would.
“Thanks, Doc. I’d appreciate that.” Trevor almost seemed embarrassed now.
“We’re doing everything we can. I’ve spoken to the fire chief to see if we can’t rent a space at the fire station to schedule drop-in hours. I know people are reluctant to come to the clinic.” Though they had assured everyone that the virus was being isolated and the chances of coming into contact with the virus was higher in town, most patients wouldn’t take the risk.
Rafe and Trevor shook hands and Trevor walked away, almost looking lighter on his feet.
“That was nice of you,” Gemma said.
He was a doctor in a small town. It was part of the role his father had asked him to play. “You sound surprised.”
“You’re busy enough. You keep adding things to your to-do list.”
Rafe shrugged. “How do you know Trevor?”
“He’s a distant relative,” Gemma said.
“Then I’m glad I offered to help him,” Rafe said.
“I didn’t realize you’d spoken to Stan about opening a clinic at the fire station,” Gemma said, referring to the Dead River fire chief.
“We need a place to meet with other patients and some of the firefighters have EMT training as well. It’s not a bad place to set up a temporary clinic,” Rafe said.
Gemma sighed. “I hate to sound like a broken record, but there’s only one real way to fix this.”
She didn’t have to say it. He knew. They had to find a cure.
* * *
“You’ll come too, won’t you, Gemma?” Gabriella asked her on the phone the next morning.
Gemma hadn’t planned on it. She hadn’t seen Gabriella in years and Gemma had so much to do that she was hesitant to spend her limited free time driving to Trevor and Gabriella’s ranch when Rafe could handle the checkup alone. Granted, being with Rafe did have a certain appeal.
Gemma couldn’t say no to family. “I’ll come with him.”
A quick call to Rafe and he seemed unenthusiastic about her joining him. “It’s a long drive for a routine check.”
“I’ll keep you company. It will make Gabriella feel better.” The truth, and Gemma knew Rafe put his patients and their happiness first.
As she’d expected, Rafe agreed and twenty minutes later, his car pulled up in front of the clinic. She said goodbye to Anand and Dr. Moore and grabbed the clinic’s OB kit. Though Trevor hadn’t mentioned that Gabriella was in distress, it was best to be prepared. The clinic wasn’t equipped to deal with critical cases. Those were referred to Cheyenne Memorial Hospital where they had newer equipment, a larger staff and a hundred times the resources. Gemma tried not to think about her cousin having a troubled pregnancy.
They started down the road and Gemma was shocked at the number of black flags hanging from bannisters, doors and windows. The virus was taking a toll on the town.
“You aren’t close with your cousin?” Rafe asked, breaking into her morose thoughts.
“Not really. We don’t have much in common.” That part of the family was significantly wealthier than she was and they lived a different life.
“It sounds like she has a life I thought you’d have,” Rafe said.
Rich wife of a rancher? “In what way?”
“Husband and kids and ranch life,” Rafe said.
Was that a compliment? “Me too. Didn’t work out that way. I planned to leave Dead River, get educated and start my life.” A life that included a husband and children. But a husband and children weren’t goals she could work for. She hadn’t figured out how to have them. In part, she blamed her broken family. As wonderful as her grandmother had been to her and her brothers, losing her mother at a young age and then dealing with her father’s drunken behavior had warped her sense of home and family.
“I thought you loved it here,” he said, almost sounding sarcastic.
“I do. My family is here. But I thought I would have a life away from here.” She had loved her time away, but in the end, she’d returned to Dead River.
“What went wrong?” Rafe asked.
“I went to college nearby and then I applied to the clinic for my first nursing job,” Gemma said. She bit her tongue over the urge to defend her decision. She didn’t need to defend it. She hadn’t done anything wrong. Her first taste of freedom had led to a few mistakes, but also learning about herself.
“Didn’t you want to see the rest of the world?” Rafe asked.
Based on what Gemma had experienced, life in Dead River was better. At least in Dead River, she knew people, the residents cared about each other and she had a safe place to land. “I like it here.”
“What was that pause?” Rafe asked. “Part of you is curious.”
She wasn’t eager to tell him about her misadventures in love and life. She’d discovered parts of herself, but she’d also had her heart broken. “I’ve always wanted to visit London and Paris and Dublin.”
“Why haven’t you?” Rafe asked.
“No interest in traveling alone.”
“Who was he?” Rafe asked.
“Who was who?”
“The man who broke your heart.”
How did he know? “Did Flint or Theo tell you, because I swear, I will kill them.” She hadn’t told her brothers much about the man who had broken her heart, but they’d known a little about him.
Rafe shook his head. “Your brothers have said nothing to me about you since I came back to Dead River. You know how protective they are. They wouldn’t tell me a Gemma secret. I’ve known for a while there’s something going on with you.”
“How?” she asked.
“You kissed me like you wanted it to go further. You said it was fine for us to sleep together.”
Gemma laughed. “I am not sure if I said those exact words, but how does that mean there’s something going on with me?”
“The Gemma I know wouldn’t sleep with a man who wasn’t her boyfriend.”
“Are you calling me trampy?”
“Never. I would never think that about you. I was thinking something must have happened to make you okay with having an affair without commitment.”
“My brothers and the people of this town like to think of me in a certain way. That’s fine. Of course, everyone else does what they want without being judged. Case in point, Theo sleeping with Mimi Rand and having a baby with her.”
“I think people judged that a little,” Rafe said.
“Small minded people and Dr. Rand, sure. He still holds what happened between Theo and Mimi against me. But I don’t have to tell you that two single, consenting adults don’t need to provide explanations to other people for their behavior. The reality is I’m a single woman who likes sex and I don’t date doctors. That’s my prerogative.”
“You won’t date doctors, but you’ll sleep with them?” he asked.
Why the scrutiny? “I like you. I was open to something happening between us.” She had been for a long time. Rafe had always been able to turn her head and turn her on.
“Has that changed?” Rafe asked.
She still wanted Rafe. Her desire for him wasn’t the problem. “It’s not me that’s closed off and confused,” Gemma said.
“Tell me what he did to you.”
Again with the scrutiny. Why did it matter what had happened in the past? The past was over and she had moved on. It had been embarrassing and she had been a world-class chump. Was she over it enough to discuss it? “I met a surgeon while I was in nursing school.”
Rafe winced. “Surgeons. Tough crowd.”
When it came to their jobs, surgeons had a reputation for being hardworking, driven and logical, but also egocentric. Jackson fit those qualities and had more unwelcome characteristics, like being selfish, rude and a liar. “We dated. I thought it was serious. He thought we were just having fun. Unfortunately, he was also having fun with several of the other nurses in my program, and women at the hospital and my friend, who he got pregnant.”
“Wow. No happy ending there for you,” Rafe said.
It wasn’t a happy ending for anyone. “He told my friend he had no interest in being a parent and applied for a job across the country. He agreed to send child support payments, but he doesn’t speak to her or his son.”
“He sounds like a piece of work,” Rafe said.
Gemma couldn’t believe she hadn’t seen it. Jackson had been the exact opposite of everything she wanted. “He was wrong for me and yet I picked him. I was head over heels, absolutely blind about his faults.” Part of what had completely captured her attention was how good Jackson was in the bedroom. Toe-curling, mind-blowing sex, lots of it, over and over all night long; he was insatiable and did things to her body she hadn’t known were possible. He was all technique and no emotion.
Thinking of it, heat flooded her body. Jackson had awakened her sensuality and Gemma hadn’t had sex that good or that hot since. Was it the lack of emotional connection that was great? Or had she tricked herself into believing the connection was there?
Enter Rafe. He was as emotionally unavailable as Jackson had been, but at least he was up front about it. He would be amazing in bed. The few moments she had been in his arms, she had known sex with him would be incomparable. Maybe she would finally have someone to say to herself, “See, Jackson? Other men know how to have great sex too and they don’t have to lie about it.” She hated that she was still making comparisons, but that was natural, wasn’t it?
“You made a bad judgment call. I’ve been there. You shouldn’t be so hard on yourself,” Rafe said.
“At least I learned. I won’t lose my heart to a doctor. Not again.”
Rafe said nothing and stared ahead down the long road leading to Trevor and Gabriella’s ranch on the outskirts of town. Then he turned on the radio. Loudly.
Gemma turned it off. “That was rude. We were talking.”
“I’m rude sometimes. You know that.”
“I do, but tell me why.”
“I don’t have anything else to say on the matter. I’m no better than this douche. I don’t commit to people in my personal life. I commit to my job. So what can I say to you that wouldn’t make me a hypocrite? I’d like you to know that not every doctor would be so cavalier with your feelings, but those words from my mouth are two-faced.”
He almost sounded angry. “I wasn’t making a personal attack on you by telling you this story.”
“All my life, people have stereotyped me. I wasn’t good enough for you when I was the poor trailer trash living on the wrong side of town and I’m not good enough for you now when I’m a doctor.”
“You’ve always been good enough for me,” Gemma said. “Being good enough isn’t what this is about.” They were talking about commitment, knowing what she wanted and not being afraid to go after it.
A muscle flexed in his jaw. “What is it about?”
“It’s about not making another mistake. I won’t fall for a man who wants different things than I do. I want a family, Rafe. A family I didn’t have. I want someone who sticks around for me. The opposite of my lazy, piece-of-crap father. I don’t see how that has anything to do with you because you want to leave Dead River. You don’t want me and you don’t want me in your life. You don’t want anyone in your life.”
Rafe pulled the car to the side of the road so abruptly Gemma was afraid he would skid out of control on the open highway. He jammed the car into park and faced her. “I don’t want you? Gemma, you might be sweet, but you are not that naïve. You know when I look at you, I want to peel off every piece of clothing on your body and make love with you until you are delirious with pleasure and satisfaction. I’ve thought of having you in my office. In my bed. I want to kiss that pretty little mouth and I want to put my hands everywhere. I want to know where you like to be touched best. Tell me, Gemma, where would you want me to touch you first?”
Gemma felt her mouth go slack-jawed. Did he expect her to answer? Or was the question meant to throw her off? “Rafe, we have an appointment.”
“Stop it. Stop avoiding. You were plain enough about what you wanted in my office. Don’t be shy now.”
Her mouth felt dry. “I don’t know.” She was overwhelmed by sensations and was almost dizzy with desire.
“Do you want to find out?”
It was either shock or curiosity, but she felt her head nodding, her hair brushing the window.
Then his mouth came down on hers in a kiss that was endlessly passionate and absolutely dominating.
This was what she had been missing and this was what she knew would happen if she let her relationship progress with Rafe. Being his friends’ kid sister, then his colleague, then his partner in their quest for a cure had blended into a shaky friendship.
What was happening now wasn’t friendship. Even if she wasn’t the most experienced woman in Dead River, she knew what Rafe wanted.
Her.
She pushed on his shoulders and he immediately leaned away, breaking the kiss.
“I’m sorry, Gemma.”
Sorry? “I’m not sorry. I’m just confused.”
Rafe jammed a hand through his hair. “About what?”
“Why did you kiss me?”
“To prove a point.”
“Which was what?”
“You’re an incredibly sexy woman. Men want you. Men have always wanted you. Doctors, construction workers, chefs, waiters and pretty much everyone who knows you sees you’re a wonderful woman. Don’t let one jerk spoil it for every guy out there who wants a shot with you.”
Was that what she had been doing? Jackson had hurt her and to date, he was the one significant romantic relationship in her life. “What about you? Do you want a shot with me?”
Rafe increased the distance between them. “Getting involved with each other won’t be simple and safe. If that kiss was any indication, it would be hot and wild and absolutely consuming. I don’t deserve a shot with you. I am leaving and your brother carries a weapon.”
&
nbsp; A joke at the end of a harsh truth. Disappointment and sadness streamed through her. Future together or not, Gemma wanted Rafe. “I know that you can’t offer me a future. But I want you to know that we would be good together. While you’re trapped in Dead River, don’t you think you should make the most of your time?” She let her eyes drift down his body.
Rafe’s eyes blazed sex. She knew he was thinking of lowering the seat of the car and having sex with her on the abandoned highway.
Maybe it was her love of a man’s body or maybe it was her feelings for Rafe, but she ran her hands over his shoulders and down his arms, encouraging him to move closer.
When he did, she let a moan escape her lips. “Yes.”
“Gemma.” A warning.
Could she push him past the point of control? Why did it make her even more excited to think about seducing Rafe? She’d always been the one seduced. Could she convince Dead River’s most notorious bad boy to sleep with her?
She kissed the underside of his jaw, then his chin. She ran a finger down his throat and then replaced her finger with her mouth.
She unlatched her seatbelt so she could maneuver better in the small space. Grabbing the handle of the seat, she lowered the driver’s side and pushed Rafe onto his back. Then she climbed on top of him.
As a petite woman, being astride a man and getting leverage was sometimes hard. But with her feet braced on the dash of the car, she rocked her body over Rafe’s.
She unzipped his jacket and pushed the heavy fabric to the sides. Grabbing the hem of his shirt, she lifted it and he shivered.
“Are you cold?” she asked.
“Turned on,” Rafe said. He slid the seat farther back until she had room to kneel in front of the steering wheel.
She scraped her nails lightly against his bare skin and alternated her mouth and her hand until she reached the waistband of his pants. The evidence of his lust was in front of her. Was she bold enough? Rafe wasn’t stopping her.
She set her hand over him and squeezed gently, then rubbed up and down. He grew larger and she drew his pants down to have better access.