The lights and the noise hit me at the same time. There are so many people yelling that I can’t even hear what they’re saying. Cooper takes my arm and draws me into the room. Everywhere I look, people are smiling at me. Fig is the first to rush toward me.
“Were you surprised?” she asks, taking my hands. I nod, suddenly unable to speak. “See?” she says to whoever can hear. “I kept the secret.”
“Miracles will never cease,” Grace says from off to one side, where she’s standing with Gina and Nonna.
Sarah steps forward and hugs me. “Happy birthday,” she says.
It’s then that I see the banner stretched across the front of the room. Happy 16th Birthday, Mia. It’s hard reading those words, realizing where I was a year ago. But then I remind myself of what Veronica said. Rachel would have wanted this for me.
Sebastian hugs me too. “I’m so glad you’re finally here,” he says. “I’m starving.” I laugh.
My father waves at me from where he’s standing with my grandmother, near the mural at the back. Cooper takes my hand and leads me through the crowded room. People I don’t know keep stopping me and wishing me happy birthday. A few of them hug me.
“Who are all these people?” I ask Cooper.
He smiles. “Anyone you don’t recognize is a Brunelli,” he says. “Nonna insisted on inviting everyone. She said you deserved a real Brunelli birthday.”
“Happy birthday, Mia-bird,” my father says, putting his arm around me.
“How did you beat us over here?” I ask, but as soon as the question is out of my mouth, I know the answer. That was what all the walking was about. I narrow my eyes at Cooper, but he just grins at me.
“Happy birthday, Mia!” Simon calls from behind the counter. I wave as he hands another mug to someone I don’t know and starts the next drink order. Sebastian, apparently too impatient to wait, has joined him. In between helping Simon make coffee, he’s scavenging the trays of fruit sitting in front of him.
“This is really beautiful, Mia,” my grandmother says, nodding toward the mural.
“Thank you,” I say, putting my hand in hers. She gives me a triple squeeze and I feel my heart jump. When she nods and smiles at me, I blink away the tears that are threatening. “Cooper is the real artist,” I say. “I pretty much just stood around in awe of his talent.”
“We did it together,” Cooper says, putting his hand on the center of my back. His hand is warm through the thin silk of my dress. “Look,” Cooper says, pointing to the maple tree. He leads me toward the wall and touches one of the tiles that make up the leaves. There on a tile that might be Sonora Sunset or August Flame are three words: Cooper and Mia.
I lean against him. “You know those tiles are there forever,” I say.
“I know,” Cooper says. I feel my cheeks heating up.
“Attention!” Simon yells from where he’s standing on a chair. “Mia! Please come here.”
People step to one side to let me pass. When I reach Simon, he steps down from the chair, and then holds up a pie with candles sticking out of the top of it. Fig quickly lights each candle. I try to think of something to wish for, but looking around the room, I realize I have nearly everything I could hope for. Nearly.
“Get on with it!” Sebastian yells, making everyone laugh. “I’m hungry!” I take a deep breath and blow. No wish. Just air. Everyone claps as the last candle flutters out.
“Finally!” Sebastian yells, drawing more laughter. Simon, Nonna, and a few other Brunellis I still don’t know start handing around pieces of pie.
I stand with Cooper, nibbling on my slice of lemon meringue. Sarah and Fig join us. Fig’s is chocolate. Sarah’s is apple. Sebastian walks up with a whole pie—blueberry—which he’s eating right out of the pan with a fork.
“So,” Fig asks. “Was this awesome?”
I nod. “What else is Simon going to serve here?” I ask.
Cooper shrugs. “Cake, cookies—dessert stuff. He said because Here serves breakfast, he wanted There to serve dessert.”
“What about serving dessert for breakfast?” Sebastian asks. He takes another bite of his pie.
“There’s one more surprise,” Cooper says. He leads me over to a far wall, where something big hangs hidden under a cloth. Fig, Sarah, and Sebastian all stand nearby. “Close your eyes,” Cooper says to me. I do. I feel air moving against my face as Cooper pulls the cloth free. Fig gasps from beside me. “Okay,” he says. “Open them.”
“Wow,” Fig says.
“Amazing,” Sarah says.
“This is good pie,” Sebastian says. Fig laughs, but I barely notice.
Hanging in front of me is a collage of faces. All kinds of frames are tacked corner to corner: iron, silver, cherry, ceramic. Inside are Cooper looking out onto the water. Gina screaming after she was frightened by the magic wand. Nonna sitting at her desk with her chin propped in her hand. Sarah with her eyes closed. Fig laughing. My dad smiling. My grandmother sitting in her chair, reading. And Rachel with her tongue stuck out. Then I see me. Cooper must have taken the photo when we were at Coney Island, because you can just see the edge of the Ferris wheel behind my shoulder. The wind is blowing my hair out of my face. My scar is clearly visible in the sunlight, but it’s my eyes that keep me looking.
“I look happy,” I say, softly. It’s the first time I’ve really seen myself in a year. Cooper slides his hand into mine.
“Are you?” he asks.
“I am,” I say, leaning into Cooper, so solid beside me.
“How did you get these from my camera?” I ask.
“You left it here, before—”
“The bridge and the rain and the kissing.” I whisper this last word and I feel his laughter against my ear.
I turn to look at him and then at all the people crowded into the restaurant. My father is standing with Simon and laughing. My grandmother and Nonna are sitting together at a table and talking while they eat their pie. Sarah is being steered away from us by Grace and Gina, who are both fawning over her. Fig is laughing with Sebastian as he looks mournfully into his empty pie pan. Even Waffles is here, weaving in between legs and snatching up dropped crumbs.
“So, what did you wish when you blew out your candles?” Cooper asks.
“I can’t tell you,” I say. But it’s not because I think that if I say it, it won’t come true, but because it already has. I can feel my heart beating for the first time in a year. I know there will be places that will always hurt, but it’s better to be hurt than to run from it like my mother did or to box it away like I tried to do.
Cooper puts his arms around me and pulls me toward him. I lean against his chest, feeling the starched fabric of his shirt on my cheek. “What now?” he asks.
“Everything,” I say.
“Hmm,” he says. “That’s pretty wide open.” I nod. I can feel the future opening up. Where there was just darkness, there are now points of light in front of me. “What do you want to do first?” he asks.
I glance around, noticing that everyone is talking and laughing together, and for the moment has forgotten about the two of us. “How about some of that kissing?” I ask, looking up at him.
“Yeah?” he asks.
“Yeah,” I say.
He leans toward me. I close my eyes and feel his mouth on mine. There are people all around us, but for now all I can hear is the sound of my own heartbeat in my ears. Then I feel an insistent thumping on the backs of my legs. I pull back and look down at Waffles standing there. I smile at him and then up at Cooper, who is shaking his head.
“You’re a mess,” he says, reaching down and ruffling Waffles’s ears.
I look down at Waffles’s mournful eyes. “Don’t worry,” I say to him. “We’re all a little messy.” I think about all the people I know here. “I don’t mind messy.”
I peer up at Cooper again, and he’s looking at me. And I feel it again: like he’s really looking at me. Seeing me.
I hear my name and then Cooper’s.
Fig is near the mural, waving her hand at us. Simon has filled a table near the back with more pies. Sebastian and Joey and a couple of other guys—who, from the look of them, have to be Brunellis—are standing behind it.
“You want to watch?” Cooper asks, gesturing toward where Sebastian is standing with his hands clasped behind his back. I nod. Cooper takes my hand and pulls me forward. Waffles follows, his tail wagging the whole way as Cooper weaves past a sea of people I don’t even know but who all know me. We stand off to the side, where we can see but won’t get hit with flying pie.
“This is going to be messy,” I say, looking at the rows of cream-covered pies on the table.
“I don’t mind messy,” Cooper says. He looks over at me and smiles.
“Get on with it!” someone yells from the other side of the room. I look over at Grace, who is standing on a chair so she can see over the crowd. Cooper steps behind me to let a stream of kids push past. He slides his arms around me and I lean back against him.
Simon is standing beside the table, looking at his watch, his hand raised. I think about my last birthday again and feel the ache in my heart. I know it will always be there. I touch my locket for a moment, thinking of the things inside: two grains of rice and a slip of paper. One grain is etched with Rachel’s name. The other with Cooper’s. They’re like a bridge from one half of my life to the other. The other, a slip of paper—a predication of the future, or maybe just a pithy saying. He who loves you will follow you. I look over at my dad, standing with Veronica and laughing. I feel Cooper’s arms around me. Then I feel a familiar weight on my foot and look down and see Waffles staring up at me.
“Ready?” Simon yells from where he’s standing beside the table.
I smile. As I’ll ever be.
The room gets quiet. The guys behind the table lean over their pies and I find myself holding my breath. The only noise is the rhythmic sound of Simon counting down from ten. When Simon yells go, the room fills with cheering; whipped cream goes flying; and I start breathing.
Acknowledgments
First, thank you to Erin Murphy of Erin Murphy Literary Agency, who always has a kind word when needed and a firm hand when called for. She navigates, leaving me free to enjoy the ride. I want to thank everyone at Blink for their kindness, support, and enthusiasm through many drafts, countless emails, and my move from Maine to Mexico to Texas. To Jillian Manning, who believed first. For Annette Bourland for championing this book. To Hannah VanVels for taking over the wheel. To Sara Bierling for helping me figure it all out. To Jacque Alberta for making sure I got it all right. (Any remaining mistakes are my own.) And to Sara Merritt and Jennifer Hoff for planning for tomorrow.
I must thank my amazing friends, Thomas and Alisa Simmons, for plying me with Albanese Sour Gummy Bears and always telling me I’m awesome (especially when I don’t feel like it). And most of all thank you to my son, Harrison. You take my wild ideas, weird sense of humor, and impulsive road trips in stride. Thank you for making me want to be better than I am every day.
Teacher/Reading Group Discussion Questions
1.One of the most important relationships in We Were Beautiful is Mia’s relationship with herself. What points in the narrative best illustrate her character growth and her ability to love and form friendships after her tragedy?
2.Mia has a very matter-of-fact, distinct voice. How are her emotions conveyed through her narrative voice?
3.What are a few ways the Brunellis impact Mia’s idea of family and unconditional love? How are Nonna and Veronica foils to one another?
4.What are some key turning points in Mia’s relationship with her grandmother? Can you identify places where Veronica starts to soften and warm to Mia?
5.One of the main romances in the story is between Mia and Cooper. How is it hinted that these two are kindred spirits right from their first meeting?
6.How does Cooper change after Mia comes into the story? Is there a turning point where closed-off Cooper becomes vulnerable Cooper?
7.In what ways is Mia’s relationship different with each of her friends? In what unique ways do they each help Mia heal?
8.How does Mia come to terms with her sister’s death, and why is this important to the story? How would you compare Mia at the beginning of the novel to Mia at the end of the novel?
9.What are the main takeaways from We Were Beautiful?
10.How can we as readers push back against the stigma surrounding ableism (discrimination against people with disabilities) and talk about it authentically?
Author Interview with Heather Hepler
What inspired you to write We Were Beautiful?
We Were Beautiful grew out of an idea that I had for a fairy tale—where a girl cursed from birth makes a decision that alters her appearance so drastically that her mother sends her away to live with her grandmother in another city. But after I started writing it, I realized that the story I really wanted to tell was about a girl in the real world who must deal with the same thing. In my fairy tale, there were all manner of possibilities—charms, witches, true love’s kiss—but in the real world, magic isn’t an option. Mia’s story became the story I had to tell—a story of a girl who must learn to trust, to love, and to live again.
What do you hope readers take away from We Were Beautiful?
That forgiveness, love, and trust are all worth believing in and fighting for.
Tell us more about your main character, Mia.
Mia is my hero in so many ways. She has to walk through some very dark times, but she keeps going and hoping and believing. She finds a way to piece her life back together using art and her friends and her family. She also loves photography and kayaking and looking at the stars. And she has a special fondness for gingerbread-pumpkin whoopie pies.
Many of the characters in We Were Beautiful are aspiring artists. What draws each of them to their specific medium?
Fig is all about using art to draw people together. She believes that art should be interactive and social. She’s fond of bright colors and large venues. She has thought about becoming an extreme artist, but when Sebastian presses her to explain what that is, she just says a lot of things about giant umbrellas and flash mobs and swimming pools full of lime Jell-O.
Sebastian sees himself as a performance artist. Competitive eating is really only a side hobby for him. He’s currently designing plans for a life-size gingerbread house where he would actually live for a whole month. Fig already asked if she could play the part of the witch.
Sarah loves music. She can play the piano, the guitar, the sitar, a shofar, and the pan flute. The last three are thanks to the owner of Music World, who wants to bring new sounds to the NYC music scene. He also moonlights as a Foley artist, and believes that Sarah’s ear for music is what gave her the idea for crushing up potato chips to make the sound of a crackling fire.
Cooper’s biggest inspiration (aside from Mia) is nature, but to him even a small patch of grass between two trash cans can be beautiful. He also has a fondness for using unusual art materials. Lately he’s been seen rummaging through the bins at Locks ‘n’ Clocks. He also has a large pile of PVC pipe stored in Simon’s back room. When Mia asked him what he was working on, he just smiled.
Mia loves taking photographs. Her favorites are the close-ups of people’s faces. She believes that everyone is beautiful; you just have to take the time to look.
Why do you think it’s important for YA readers to meet characters like Mia, Cooper, Fig, Sebastian, and Sarah?
I think it’s important to remember that everyone has a story. It’s easy to just focus on the things we can see—beauty and wealth and status. But the important things are the things that you can’t see, even the things we hide from each other. Mia and her friends have learned this. They support each other, love each other, and trust each other—even with the most painful parts of their stories.
What came first in this novel: characters or plot? Have you always known your main characters’ story arcs or w
ere there surprises along the way?
Mia was the first thing. I knew she was scarred, but I didn’t know why. It wasn’t until I began to write that I realized what had happened to her and her sister. I was surprised by Fig. Her personality just slammed into me and made me laugh. She’s the kind of friend everyone should have, and everyone should be. The dogs that Cooper walks were another surprise. Now I can’t imagine the story without them.
The friendship between Mia and Fig is a major theme in this story. What fictional or real-life friendships inspired your characters?
I tend to gravitate toward friendships with people who are my opposite. I’m quiet and shy. I prefer solitary hobbies like running and reading and baking bread. But my friends are all my opposites. They are all outgoing. They like to throw parties and join clubs and meet new people. I’m always drawn to friendships like Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger’s, Frodo and Sam’s, Meg Murray and Calvin O’Keefe’s. You can’t imagine one without the other.
Do you feel like your characters are your friends, or extensions of yourself? Which character do you feel resembles you the most? Which character do you wish you were more like?
Usually my characters are versions of myself or at least who I’d like to be. Mia is the most like me. She is reserved and quiet and likes pie. She also loves nature and likes to sit out in the cold and look at the stars. Fig is who I’d like to be. She is fearless and outgoing and always has a big plan. She also makes mistakes, says she’s sorry, and moves on. Her confidence in herself and the love of those around her inspire me.
What is your favorite part of the writing process?
I love those moments where I go into what I call the writing fog. This is where the real world falls away and I’m in the story, watching it happening around me. In those moments, it feels less like creating a story and more like simply recording the story as it plays out.
How was the experience of writing We Were Beautiful different than writing your previous novels?
It was different mostly because I literally have eleven different drafts of it on my computer. The story morphs from a fairy tale story to what it is now in stages. It seems a lot like I took a recipe for angel food cake and made it eleven times, substituting one ingredient at a time until I ended up with chocolate chip cookies at the other end.
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