by E. L. Todd
“I don’t.” I stepped inside and moved into the kitchen. “But I don’t expect you to look like a monster either…”
She swatted my arm playfully. “If you want my muffins, you better not be a jerk.”
I searched the counters and looked for her newest creation.
“They’re in here.” She opened a glass lid to a display case, and the muffins were set on a thin sheet of white paper.
I sat beside her. “What are they?”
“Almond vanilla muffins.”
“Hmm…sounds good.” I grabbed one and immediately took a bite. “Damn, this is good. What’s your secret?”
“Like I would tell a soul.” She grabbed one for herself then picked at it.
“Come on, you can tell me.” I turned toward her and kept eating.
“Hell no. You’ll steal my recipe.”
“And do what with it?” I asked. “Do I look like a baker to you?”
“You can sell it online.”
“I doubt anyone would buy it,” I jabbed. I finished the treat then wiped my fingers on a napkin. “You’re really going to wait until after college to start your business? You should just do it now.”
“I don’t have any money.” She picked at the remaining crumbs inside the delicate paper.
“It’s called a loan.”
“I don’t have any collateral. Axel said he would let me borrow some when he starts making more money. I’ll just have to wait.”
I wished I could loan her some money. Honestly, I didn’t have much at the moment. I needed to get through my internship so I could move away and pursue my dream in Manhattan. For now, I didn’t have anything to give. “Maybe you can get a truck and do it that way. I’ve seen people do that.”
She shook her head. “No. I want a real bakery where people sit down and read a newspaper while they enjoy their coffee. That’s the way it’s supposed to be done. I want to know my customers. You know, have a relationship with them.”
I wasn’t a people person. In fact, I hated them. “Then stick to your dream and be patient.”
“Besides, it gives me more time to perfect my craft.”
I eyed the muffins but didn’t take another one. “I think you’ve perfected it enough.”
“My kids are going to be fat,” she said with a chuckle. “And it’ll be all my fault.”
I could picture her as a mom. Her kids would come home from school and she would kiss each one on the head. Then her husband would walk inside, handsome and strong. He would embrace her like he loved her—every day. The image made me sad but I couldn’t figure out why. “But they’ll still be cute if they inherit your beautiful ass.”
She chuckled. “If only…”
We fell into comfortable silence. The nice thing about Francesca was the conversation. Most girls I knew didn’t know when to shut up. They rambled on because they were uncomfortable. But she was confident in her skin. Letting the silence stretch on didn’t bother either one of us. I wasn’t even that comfortable with Axel.
“You really came over here just for a muffin?” Her voice turned serious, not playful like it was a moment before.
I didn’t want to tell her the real reason I was over there. I wasn’t comfortable telling anyone. It was something I’d take to the grave. “I couldn’t sleep.”
“Neither could I.”
“Something on your mind?” I felt bad asking her questions when I wouldn’t answer them in return. But she didn’t seem to mind.
“I had a bad dream. I haven’t been able to close my eyes since.”
When I looked into her eyes, I saw the anxiety deep within. “You know what I do?”
“Hmm?”
“I pick my favorite song and try to sing it backwards in my head.”
“Does that work?”
I nodded. “It blocks out all other thoughts and allows me to fall asleep.”
“I guess I could try that…”
“What was your nightmare about?” I rested my arms on the table.
She looked out the kitchen window with a dazed expression on her face. Her lips were pressed tightly together like she was having an internal debate. “Nothing…”
Disappointment flushed through me but I knew it was unfair. How could I expect her to trust me when I didn’t trust her? “How was your day?”
“Good. I had a date tonight.”
My heart picked up slightly but I didn’t react. My hair stood up on the back of my neck, and for the first time that night, I felt uncomfortable. I’d just had a round of meaningless sex with a girl whose name I couldn’t remember, but hearing Francesca say that she had a date made me feel cold. “How’d it go?”
She shrugged. “It was fine. But I don’t think I’ll go out with him again.”
“What didn’t you like about him?”
“I don’t know…there just wasn’t a spark there. When we kissed on the doorstep, I didn’t feel anything.”
When I kissed her, it felt like a damn fireworks show. That night still came to me at the most random times, mainly when I was in bed with someone. “It sounds like he isn’t the right one.”
“No, he isn’t.” She picked at the wrapper in her fingers. “I don’t think the right one exists anymore.”
The melancholy in her voice made me sad. “He does. Just keep looking.” There was a special someone out there for her. I knew it. And I knew every guy who came across her wanted to be that special someone.
“How was your night?”
Fucking terrible. “It was okay.”
“Did you do anything fun?”
“I went out to a bar.” That simple sentence explained the rest of my night without me having to go into detail.
“How’d that go?” If it bothered her, she hid it. I suspected she was over me and didn’t think about me that way anymore. It seemed like she only felt friendship toward me.
“It was a blur. When I kicked her out, she didn’t want to go. She wasn’t happy about that.”
Francesca smiled slightly. “You could take two seconds out of your day and take her to breakfast or something.”
“That’s two seconds I don’t have.”
She rolled her eyes but still seemed amused. “Maybe you have everything worked out, and I should be more like you.”
My eyes moved to her face.
“What’s the point of going on date after date if I don’t meet anyone worthwhile? At least if I did it your way, I would feel satisfied the next morning.”
That was the last thing I wanted for her. “No.”
She turned her eyes on me.
“You’re too good for that. Believe me, you would just be more miserable. You’re classy, and you should stay that way. Guys will only use you and never remember your name.”
“And I would use them back.”
A protective side of me emerged, and I wasn’t even sure where it came from. “No.” That was all I said, and I didn’t need to say anything else.
She held my gaze for a moment before she looked away. “I guess I’m going to try to get back to sleep…”
I didn’t want to leave. When I was with her, I didn’t think about all the shit in my life. I didn’t think about my dad lying in the hallway looking half dead. And I didn’t think about my frail mom cowering away from his raised hand. Francesca made me feel at peace. “I should probably go too. Thank you for the muffin.”
“Of course. You’re just lucky I haven’t started charging you.” She rose from the table and pulled her hair over one shoulder.
“I’d be broke if you did.” I stared at the hollow of her throat and imagined placing kisses there. Her skin tasted so sweet, like honey. Every time I looked at her front door, I remembered that night when I almost had her. A part of me wished I’d gone all the way. But a bigger part of me was thankful I did the right thing.
She smiled. “I guess you’re right.” When her green eyes met mine, there seemed to be longing deep within them. It was like she wanted me to stay but re
fused to admit it.
I wanted to stay too.
“I can sit by your bedside until you fall asleep.” The offer came from nowhere, and I didn’t think twice about it. The thought hadn’t even entered my mind before I blurted it out.
“You would do that?”
I would do anything for you. “Come on.” I headed to the hallway and waited for her to lead the way.
She gave me one final look before she walked in front of me and entered her bedroom. The walls were painted gray and there was white trimming. Her bedspread was yellow and her furniture was white. It fit her personality perfectly.
She got into bed then turned off the light. She lay on her side and faced me, her soft hair scattered around the pillow. I wanted to crawl into bed and kiss her lips until they were puckered and red. I wanted to roll around in her sheets and make her moan for me. My dick hardened just from thinking about it.
There was a chair right beside her bed so I took a seat.
She turned her gaze on me. “Want to read me a story?”
“Will that help you sleep?”
She nodded. “My dad used to do it all the time.”
I looked at her nightstand and saw a stack of books. One caught my attention. “The Hobbit?”
“It’s good. Have you read it?”
“No. But I’m surprised you have.”
“Why?” She pulled the sheet to her shoulder.
“Isn’t it about dragons and magic and stuff?”
“So?”
I flipped through the pages. “I didn’t realize you were into that.”
“I read everything. You name it, and I’ve probably read it.”
The idea of her reading about dwarves going on an adventure tugged at my heart in a way I couldn’t explain.
“If you’re tired, you can just lay here with me. Usually when someone else is in my bed, I’m a lot more comfortable.”
Did she share her bed often? Why did I care? Without thinking, I kicked off my shoes and lay on the opposite side of the bed. I couldn’t believe I did it until it was already done. Her bed felt even smaller now that I was in it. The sheets were soft, even through my shirt and jeans.
Francesca turned over and faced me, but she stayed on her side of the bed. Her eyes searched mine like she could see something I was trying to hide. “I know you didn’t come over here to eat a muffin. And I know you didn’t come over here because you couldn’t sleep.”
My heart skipped a beat.
“I know something is bothering you. Your eyes give you away.”
Could she read me that easily?
“I know you don’t want to talk about it so I’m not going to ask. But I want you to know I’m here for you.” Her hand moved to mine and she closed her eyes. “Just like how you’re here for me now.”
Caffeine
Francesca
I leaned back and tossed the coffee bean into the air. It soared toward the ceiling then came back to earth. My mouth was open and I tried to catch it, but I missed and it bounced off my chin. “Dammit.” I tossed another one into the air and made another attempt.
“I need to talk to you.” Marie stormed into the café while tying her apron around her waist.
“Hold on. I’ll get it this time.”
She snatched the coffee beans out of my hand. “This is serious.”
I guess my new trick would have to wait. “What’s wrong, Marie?”
“The house owner just called me this morning.”
“And?” They routinely checked on the house so that wasn’t surprising.
“Apparently, they’re redoing the carpets and putting in hardwood floors.”
“Great!” I’ve always wanted to have hardwood floors in the house. It made everything look more elegant.
“No, that’s not great.” Marie put one hand on her hip. “That means we have to live somewhere else for a whole week.”
“Oh…” I hadn’t foreseen that problem.
“Stacy doesn’t have room because her mom is coming to visit, and I don’t want to infringe on anyone else. So I think I’m going to stay with Anthony.”
“But I thought you were going to dump him?”
“Well, I need somewhere to live for another week,” she snapped.
“That’s fair…”
“Hey, he’ll get laid for another week. I doubt he minds. Where are you going to go?”
“Uh…” I hadn’t thought about that. I searched my mind for someone who wouldn’t have a problem loaning me their couch for a week.
“Am I interrupting anything?” Hawke’s deep voice came from behind the counter.
“Oh, hi.” I clutched my chest in surprise. I didn’t even hear the bell ring overhead.
“Oh, hi, to you too,” he said sarcastically. There was a smirk on his lips so I knew he was teasing me.
Marie eyed both of us before she rolled her eyes. She made it abundantly clear how she felt about Hawke. She didn’t understand how we could go from lovers to friends so easily. It was really difficult to explain so I stopped trying. “I need to clock in.” She walked through the curtain and disappeared.
I turned to Hawke. “The usual?”
“You know me so well.”
I filled the coffee cup then handed it to him.
“So…everything okay?” He sipped his coffee.
“Oh yeah. Everything is fine.” Hawke slept in my bed the other night, but it wasn’t weird at all, surprisingly. Now that I knew he would only be a friend, I stopped hoping for something more. But it did frighten me how natural it felt. It didn’t feel uncomfortable to sleep beside him. I didn’t have a single guy friend I could do that with. “Our landlord is kicking us out for a week because they are redoing the floors. Now Marie and I need to crash somewhere.”
“Where are you staying?”
“Not sure. I need to figure that out.” I rubbed my chin as I brainstormed.
“Axel?”
“No.” I released an uncontrollable laugh. “God, no. I’d only go there if I didn’t have any other choice.”
“A girlfriend?”
“I have a few, but they’re already pretty crowded with their other roommates…” There was a solution to my problem but I just had to find it.
“Who’s Marie staying with?”
“A guy she’s seeing.”
He took another drink of his coffee.
“I’m sure I’ll figure it out. I always do.”
“Why don’t you stay with me?”
Did he just invite me to crash at his place? “Seriously?”
“Why not?” he asked. “I’m hardly there anyway because I work all the time. It only has one bedroom but you can have it. I can sleep on the couch.”
“Uh…” That was nice of him to offer but I wasn’t expecting it. “I don’t know what to say.”
“You don’t have to say anything. Let me know.” He left cash on the counter then walked away with his coffee. He sat down in a booth then began to work on his laptop.
Marie came out a moment later. “Anthony just texted me and said I could stay with him. He said you can have the couch if you want.”
Crashing at Marie’s soon-to-be-ex-boyfriend’s house didn’t sound fine. “Hawke just offered to let me stay with him. I think I’ll do that.”
“Stay with Hawke?” she asked incredulously. “For a week?”
“What’s the big deal?”
“Uh…you almost slept with him.” She snapped her fingers in my face like I needed to wake up. “That’s a pretty big deal.”
“That was almost two months ago. Now we’re just friends.”
She rubbed her temple like she had a headache. “How can two people go from practically ripping each other’s clothes off to being just friends?”
It didn’t make sense to me either. But it just worked with Hawke and I. “I can’t explain…”
“Well, try.” She crossed her arms over her chest.
“You wouldn’t understand.” I couldn’t believe I
was about to say any of this out loud.
“You’re going to tell me anyway.”
“Hawke and I…I told you we had a connection the moment we met.”
“Yes, I remember.”
“Well, that connection is still there. It’s like…whether he’s a boyfriend or a friend, he needs to be in my life. I can’t explain it better than that. I just…need him. And I’m pretty sure he needs me too. I feel like he’s meant to be a part of me in some capacity.”
Marie looked even more confused.
“I know it sounds crazy but…I feel like our paths were meant to cross.”
“Because…?”
“It’s one of those things that you just know. Trust me on this.”
“You think this guy is your soul mate or something?”
“No, that’s not what I said.”
“Girl, I’m starting to think you’re crazy.”
I knew how crazy I sounded from her perspective. “It’s one of those things that no one understands. But I know I understand it. And that’s all that matters.”
Marie sighed like she was ready to drop the subject. “Just don’t get hurt, okay?”
“I won’t.”
“Because I’ll kick his ass.” She pointed her finger in my face like she meant business.
My lips softened into a smile. “I know.”
***
Hawke was still in the lobby when I clocked out, so I slid into the seat across from him. “Still working?”
He shut the screen of his laptop with a faint smile on his lips. “Work never sleeps.”
“Will you always work this much?”
“Not when I stop being an intern. I’m doing all the grunt work no one else wants to do. But when this is over, I’ll have everything I’ve been working so hard for.”
“So, you want to be an investor?”
“In a nutshell.”
“But that sounds…boring.”
He smiled like he wasn’t offended. “It’s like gambling but with more research. You’re always trying to figure out where the next big thing is going to come from. When should you sell? When should you buy? It’s actually really interesting.”
“Hmm…I’ve never thought about it that way.”
He placed his laptop in his bag. “Baking doesn’t seem very exciting, but I’m sure it is.”
“It’s very exciting. When I see your face light up every time you have one of my muffins, it makes it all worthwhile.”