by E. L. Todd
She fell down some stairs?
Stairs?
“I’ll be right there. Thank you for calling me.”
“Of course.”
***
Francesca was the last thing on my mind right then. I left without telling her where I went and I didn’t leave a note. I didn’t have time for that.
I got to the hospital then located my mom’s room number. Even though they said she was going to be okay, I wasn’t. I was shaking in anger. My heart ached in pain. My skull wanted to crack because my blood was boiling.
When I walked into the room, she was the only one there. Mom lay on the bed, thin and fragile. Her arm was in a cast and tubes were hooked up everywhere. A pipe went down her throat, and the respirator was breathing for her.
I inched closer into the room and looked down at her helpless body. When I was young, my mom used to be full of life. But ever since I became an adult, she’d been nothing but dead. She was gone but her body still lingered on.
I sat in the chair by her bed and felt a million emotions hit me at once. Agony moved through my body at her afflictions, and I even felt my eyes moisten as I looked at her. Then rage consumed me immediately afterward. I wanted to put a bullet in my father’s brain.
Then his eyes.
Then his heart.
My mother didn’t deserve this. I didn’t deserve this. No one did.
***
Hours passed before the nurse checked on her. The intubator was removed and she started breathing on her own. Her vitals were checked and everything looked stable.
But she still looked broken.
“She’ll be waking up shortly.” The nurse said before she walked out.
I nodded because I didn’t know what else to say.
Thirty minutes later, Mom’s eyes fluttered open. She stared at the ceiling like she didn’t know where she was. She looked around, taking in her surroundings. Then she finally looked at me. It took her a moment to process what she was seeing. “Hawke?” Her voice came out raspy and cracked.
“It’s me.” I moved my chair closer to the bed and grabbed her hand. “Mom, the doctor said you’re going to be okay. He broke your shoulder and your arm, and you had some internal bleeding but they repaired it.”
“I don’t feel anything…”
“It’s the pain medication.”
She stared at the ceiling before she turned back to me. “How long have I been here?”
“They admitted you twelve hours ago. I’ve been here for three.”
She watched my face with blue eyes so similar to my own. “It was sweet of you to come.”
“I’ll always come, Mom.” When had I not been there for her? She had no one else in the world but me. She didn’t have any siblings or parents. I was all she had. “When they release you from the hospital, you can stay with me until we find a bigger place. We’ll get a house somewhere. Don’t worry about it.” She almost lost her life, but maybe it would do her some good. Now she would understand she really needed to get out of there. If she didn’t…who knew if she’d survive another round.
“Hawke…I’m not going to stay with you.”
The blood pounded in my ears.
“It’s not what you think. I fell down the stairs.”
My words came out as a growl. “You don’t even have stairs.”
“We were at the mall…”
“You hate the mall.”
She wouldn’t make eye contact with me. “I just don’t want to give you the wrong idea.”
“So, you’ll lie instead?” I snapped. “Don’t be stupid, Mom. I know he did this to you. I warned you it would happen. You can’t stay with him anymore. Stay with me. I’ll protect you.”
She shook her head slowly. “Hawke, no.”
“Why the fuck not?” My threshold had been reached and the anger came out.
“Lower your voice,” she hissed.
“No. Why are you doing this to yourself? Just leave. It’s not that hard to do.”
“It’s complicated.”
“Because you’re making it complicated,” I snapped. “Grab your shit and leave. If he comes after you, I’ll put him in the ground. You don’t need to worry about that.”
She shut her mouth because she knew it was pointless to argue with me.
“Let me get this straight,” I said. “You have two broken bones and a damaged spleen, but you want to go back there? It’s like you’re brainwashed or something.”
“Love is complicated…”
“I love Francesca with all my heart, and she drives me crazy because she’s a pain in the ass, but I would never hurt her. That’s unacceptable, Mom.”
She closed her eyes in shame.
“I’m telling the police.” They didn’t do anything last time but maybe they would this time.
“Don’t you dare.” Her eyes snapped open.
“I don’t give a damn what you want.” I pushed the chair back and stood up.
There was a knock outside the door before someone moved the curtain back and stepped inside.
At six three, he took up the doorway the second he walked inside. His short brown hair was practically a buzz cut. He was thick and strong like an angry bull, and he had arms the size of an average person’s head. A look of pity and remorse was in the eyes identical to my own.
Then they met mine.
He stared at me for several seconds because he was surprised to see me there. Apparently, he thought I wouldn’t get the call. Fear moved into his eyes, but it was only there for a nanosecond. I used to be afraid of this man. But now it was the other way around.
“You. Are. Worthless.” Seeing him set foot in that room after he put my mother there set me on edge. He was a pathetic excuse for a man. He was evil. When he used to hurt me, he laughed like it was some kind of sick joke. Now he pounded on an old woman who was barely a hundred pounds.
I charged around the bed, ready to pull his eyes out of their sockets. I wanted to inflict as much pain as possible. He’d be the one in the ICU when I was finished with him.
“Hawke!” Mom called. “No!”
That didn’t stop me.
Instead of facing me, he turned away like a coward. He stepped out of the doorway and into the hall.
I tackled him hard into the opposite wall and slammed his body with as much force as possible. Then my fists were flying in his face. I hadn’t slept in twenty-four hours and I hadn’t eaten anything either, but a spike of adrenaline entered my bloodstream and I had the energy of thirteen cans of Red Bull. Blood flew from his nose and mouth with every hit. I kicked him when he fell to the ground, inflicting as much pain as possible.
Security came from behind and grabbed me, forcing me off of him. A few nurses ran to attend to his cuts and bruises. I was certain I broke a few of his ribs just like he did to me. I was certain I inflicted enough damage to leave permanent scars.
But it wasn’t enough.
“Let me go.” I jerked loose from their hold. “I’m calm. Let me go.”
They finally dropped their hold.
I walked back into the room where my mother sat on the bed looking frightened. “I can’t deal with this anymore.” My chest heaved with pain. “I can’t see you like this. If you won’t let me protect you…then I have to leave. If you ever change your mind, you know where to find me.” I headed to the door then turned back around one last time. “Goodbye, Mom.”
Farewell
Francesca
I woke up to Hawke’s absence.
There wasn’t a note or a text message. He just disappeared in the middle of the night like a phantom. When I called him, he never answered. I went by his apartment but he wasn’t there.
What the hell happened?
I asked Axel if he knew anything but he had no idea. I called a few more times and left voicemails. Then I went back to his apartment and hoped he might be there.
But he wasn’t.
The last time I went to sleep, everything was fine. We were happy
and in love. And when I woke up, everything was different. He was MIA. He never disappeared without any explanation.
The only possibility was something happened to his mom. She called him in the middle of the night and asked for help. But that didn’t explain why Hawke hadn’t returned my calls.
Unless he couldn’t?
***
On Monday, I called Axel the second he got off work. “Was he there?”
“Yeah,” Axel said quickly. “I didn’t know he got that job in New York.”
“What? What job?”
“He said he got the position at that broker and he’s moving. He walked into our boss’s office and just quit.”
He’s moving? This wasn’t making any sense. “Are you sure that’s what he said?”
“Positive.”
“How did he seem?”
“I don’t know…a little quiet. Is everything okay with you guys? I told him you were trying to get a hold of him, but he said he already called you back.”
Hawke never lied. “I have to go.” I hung up without saying goodbye and drove to Hawke’s as fast as I could.
***
There was a moving truck outside, and a group of sweaty men were loading things into the back of it. When I peeked inside, I recognized Hawke’s furniture. His bedframe and dressers were in the rear.
What the hell?
I ran upstairs then approached his door. It was wide open as people moved in and out. Uninvited, I walked inside and saw that it was completely bare except for a few boxes.
“Is this the last of it?” A guy in a uniform stacked the boxes on a dolly then tipped it sideways.
“Yeah.” Hawke’s voice echoed from the hallway.
“I’ll bring it outside.” The guy gave me a quick look before he walked out the front door.
Oh my god.
Hawke came down the hallway with something in his hand. His eyes were on the floor, and when he finally looked up and saw me, he stopped in his tracks.
There were so many things going on in my head I didn’t know what to say first.
He held my gaze with no emotion in his eyes. He was completely empty. Then he came closer to me, his look guarded.
“What…I don’t understand… What the hell is going on?” Tears welled up in my eyes. “I don’t hear from you for two days and then you’re moving? What the fuck, Hawke?”
In his hand was my journal. He gripped it with his fingers as he stared at me.
This didn’t look good.
“My dad put my mom in the hospital. She has broken bones, internal damage… She almost died.”
I immediately gasped. “Oh my god…”
“I went to see her and…she still wants to stay with him. I can’t be here anymore. I can’t sit here and watch her die. I’ve done everything I can to get her out of there, but she won’t budge.”
Now I understood. “Hawke…I’m so sorry.”
“I got a job offer in New York so I’m leaving. I can’t wait another day. I can’t stay in this town.”
How could I be angry with him after everything he’d been through? “We can do a long distance relationship until I finish school. And it’s just a few hours away. I can make the drive on the weekends.”
He dropped his gaze.
What did that mean? “Or you can come up here…”
“Francesca, listen to me…”
Oh my god.
No.
This isn’t happening.
“My mom is just like you. She fights for my dad because she believes in him…which she shouldn’t. You do the same thing with me. It’s not healthy, and it’s going to get you killed.”
I threw my arms down. “You’re nothing like him.”
His anger flared. “I’m exactly like him.” He slammed his fist into his chest. “I look just like him. I talk just like him. I. Am. Him.” He breathed hard as he stared at me with wide eyes. “It starts with an innocent push until it develops into something more. That’s how it always happens…”
“How many times do I have to tell you that you’re wrong?” My tears welled to the size of droplets and fell down my cheeks. “Hawke, you’re the greatest man I’ve ever known. Stop making these assumptions. Just because you’re passionate and aggressive doesn’t make you violent. You control your anger. Stop making yourself guilty by association—”
“I love you.” He held my gaze as he said it. “And I can’t let you end up like my mother. I can’t do it. I’m sorry that I started this relationship to begin with. I should have just left you alone.”
“I don’t.” I wiped my tears away. “I know you’re upset right now but cutting me out isn’t the answer.”
“It’s the only answer,” he said calmly. “I’m a monster, Francesca. You deserve so much more than what I can offer.”
“You’re the only man I want—forever.”
He closed his eyes like he was in pain.
“Hawke, this is stupid. Don’t do this.” This fight was different than all our other ones. He wasn’t angry or aggressive. He looked defeated, like he’d already let me go.
“I never knew I was a jealous person until I fell in love with you. I never knew I was possessive until I finally found something I didn’t want to share. I always knew how angry and violent I was, but I didn’t realize how much it would affect you. If I stayed, I wouldn’t have any right to tell you I love you.”
“Don’t do this…” I sniffed and crossed my arms over my chest, feeling lost.
“I have to.” He held the journal in his hand then extended it to me. “I can’t keep this.”
Was he trying to hurt me? “What are you doing?”
“I can’t keep this.”
I shoved it into his chest. “It was a gift. I gave it to you for a reason.”
“But I—”
“I don’t want anyone else to have it.”
He slowly brought it back to his side and didn’t make any move to touch me. “I have to go…the movers are waiting.” He walked around me and headed to the door.
That hurt most of all.
I turned around and watched him. “That’s it? We end this with just a simple goodbye and a wave?”
He stayed inside the door and didn’t walk over the threshold.
“Maybe you don’t know what the connection between us is but I do. I’ve known it for a long time.”
He turned to me, his eyes coated with moisture. “I do know what it is.”
“No, you don’t! Because if you did, you wouldn’t leave.” I was growing hysterical, unable to handle all the knives piercing my body.
“I’m sorry…” He stepped over the threshold.
“We’re soul mates.”
He stilled and turned around.
“Don’t you understand?”
He closed his eyes for a long time, like he was in pain. “I know we are. That’s why I have to leave. How can I hurt someone I share a soul with? How can I hurt someone I’m destined to love? I won’t let anything happen to you. Eventually, you’ll find someone who really loves you. He may not love you the way I do…but at least he won’t hurt you.”
“You can’t do this to us…”
He lowered his gaze and didn’t look up again. “You know where to find me if you ever need anything—it doesn’t matter how much time has passed.”
My body was growing weaker. I was fading away.
“Goodbye, Muffin.” He stayed on the other side of the door like he might say something else.
I dropped to my knees and felt the carpet under my fingertips. We’d made love on it more times than I could count. The place was full of memories, all of them beautiful in their own way. Hawke had become an essential part of my life. He filled that gaping void that formed when I lost my parents. And now that he was gone, everything drained out again. I shattered like a broken window. I cracked like a broken bone.
When I didn’t say anything, he walked out and shut the door behind him. I heard the door click when it closed, shut
ting him out of my life forever. His footsteps were heard as he headed down the hall. I listened to them like they were a life raft. They were my last connection to him before he was gone forever.
And then the sound disappeared.
Thank you!
Don’t worry! The next book in the series, TUESDAY is available now. You’ll find the link at the end, along with an exciting giveaway. I hoped you loved reading Monday as much as I loved writing it. This story is very close to my heart, and it makes me believe soul mates truly exist. It would really mean the world to me if you could write a short review, even a single sentence. It’s the best kind of support you can give an author. I would greatly appreciate it.
Giveaway Opportunity!
Enter to win a beautiful Coach purse ($400 value along with gift receipt just in case it's not your color) along with the entire Timeless Series in paperback. The winner will be announced 05/17/2016.
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Is that really the end of Hawke and Francesca? Or is there still hope? Find out in the next installment of the series TUESDAY.
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