Past Hurts (Sizzling Miami Book 1)

by Jessie G

  “Ric.”

  “That’s right.” Easing to the side, he gathered Davin close and whispered, “Thank you.”

  “For what?”

  “For walking through the door.”

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Davin

  “You didn’t go to Terence’s funeral.” They were floating on rafts in the pool, letting the sun and the silence ease them down from the emotional roller coaster of the morning.

  “Why would I have gone?”

  “Closure, maybe. I don’t know. For your parents?”

  “I do a lot for my parents. That would have been asking too much.”

  “Do you think they’ll forgive me for ruining Christmas?”

  “There is nothing to forgive. It’s hardly your fault that my brother got himself killed.” Though Alaric never opened his eyes, Davin could hear the annoyance come through clearly.

  “I missed them.”

  “They missed you.”

  Yeah, his quota of words had definitely maxed out. “Do you plan to feed me today?”

  “Didn’t I tell you? I’m quitting as cook of this little adventure.”

  “Quitting?”

  “Yeah, you used up all my recipes.”

  “Carbonara and steak?”

  “Pretty much.”

  “So, you think I should cook for you now?”

  “You were always better at it.”

  “And cleaning and being the good little housewife.”

  “That position is no longer available. I hired someone this morning.”

  “Oh.” Davin choked on a laugh. “Did you now?”

  “Yep.” The matter of fact tone was ruined by Alaric’s amused smile.

  “So, get your little housewife to make us a meal.”

  Alaric turned to look at Davin through one open eye. “Go make us a meal.”

  Davin turned to look behind him. “I don’t see anyone back there.”

  “Damn housewives are never around when you need them.”

  “I suppose I’ll have to do it.”

  “Sometime before I waste away would be nice.”

  Laughing, Davin floated to the step of the pool and climbed out. Folded towels were sitting on a low table and he grabbed one to dry off before wrapping it around his waist. “These bathing suits are obnoxious.”

  “That’s why I bought them.” Laughter and a splash of pool water followed him as he retreated to the kitchen.

  Knowing Alaric had shopped while he was sleeping didn’t leave him encouraged about their choices. While he was happy to enjoy a home cooked meal, Alaric never thought about things like vegetables or spices. It was self-preservation that made him take over the grocery shopping, then the cooking, and yeah, he’d been an exceptionally content little housewife.

  Alaric always noticed and complimented his efforts, showering him with praise and love and… He had to stop thinking of before. They couldn’t go back and no matter how special the memories were, they were just that. Going forward was a gift all its own and he would be a fool to get so mired in the past that he’d forget to enjoy the moment.

  Focusing on the present, he started rummaging around in the fridge and cabinets until he had the fixings for chicken salad. After they ate, he’d convince Alaric to take him to the grocery store for some real food and maybe explore the town. Crowds tended to make him antsy these days, but he thought he would enjoy sightseeing again if they were doing it together.

  Alaric was never more relaxed than when they’d hop in the car and get away for a few days. Key West, Orlando, Savannah, the destination didn’t matter. They rarely planned anything specific, just packed a bag, picked a spot on the map and off they went. If Davin were being honest, he cared less about the trip and more about seeing his lover happy.

  It was one of the reasons he took on the household tasks, so when Alaric would get home after juggling his insane schedule, he wouldn’t have to do anything. Davin had loved every second of making their apartment a home. He got a rush out of watching Alaric enjoy a meal he prepared, and he took pride in keeping their things neat. It wasn’t that he didn’t have his own responsibilities to handle, he just got more enjoyment out of the domesticity.

  “That looks really good,” Alaric called out seconds before strong arms wrapped around him. Davin didn’t want to think of it as a warning or a chance for him to brace for impact, even though that’s probably exactly what it was. Instead, he tilted his head, knowing Alaric would want access to his neck.

  “Thanks. We’ve exhausted your supplies.”

  “Are you suggesting we leave our cocoon?”

  “Or starve.”

  “Can’t have that. There are some cute shops we can hit up before we go to the grocery store.” Alaric’s lips found the hollow behind his ear and Davin lost track of the conversation. How had he lived without this for so long? “Would you like that?

  Like more of Alaric’s lips on his neck? “Uh huh.”

  Strong hands spanned his waist, keeping him still between the counter and Alaric’s body. In the back of his mind, he knew all it would take is one step to the side, and he could be free. But he wasn’t going to do that. Not when Alaric was working over his neck and shivering right along with him. When he moaned, Alaric switched tactics, catching the muscle between his teeth and suckling hard.

  The grunt of satisfaction was all he needed to know before Alaric said, “I marked you.”

  “No doubt,” Davin teased.

  Lifting one hand, Alaric wrapped it around Davin’s throat to urge his head back. It’s something he would have done before and knew it would immediately put Davin in the mindset he wanted to be in. Today was no different.

  “You’re good,” he whispered, holding Davin still as his mouth continued to wander.

  “I’m good,” Davin repeated, grateful for the assurance and needing to give it back. Once upon a time, Alaric would have bent him over the counter or dragged him to the floor and though he knew they weren’t at that point yet, he shivered as the memories ramped up the moment.

  “And delicious.” Switching tactics, Alaric gripped his jaw, urging his head around until they were almost kissing. “But as delicious as you are, lunch will spoil if we keep this up.”

  It took him a stupidly long time to realize Alaric wasn’t going to kiss him and even then, he couldn’t understand why. “It won’t spoil in the fridge.”

  “Undoubtedly true but—” Tracing the curve of Davin’s jaw, Alaric leaned in and gave him the tiniest taste. “—slow.”

  “Slow?” He asked, still struggling to catch up with the why.

  “Slow,” Alaric repeated firmly.

  The part of him that wanted to push his luck lost to the side that remembered Alaric was doing this for his benefit. Taking it slow, giving him a chance to react, pushing but not so hard that he fell out of his comfort zone. “Then step back and let me catch my breath.”

  “You can do that with me here.” Because the whole point was for him to get comfortable with the feel of Alaric’s body against his, the touch of his hand, and eventually, hopefully, more. He could have pointed out that he never flinched, never tensed or tried to pull away. But he was grateful that Alaric was willing to be patient and trusted Alaric to know when the time was right to move forward. “You please me so much.”

  Davin flushed under the praise and turned to finish preparing their lunch. “Let’s eat before I forget why we’re taking this slow.”

  “I won’t forget.” It was a promise to take care with him, no matter what, and Davin didn’t know how to respond to all the sweetness.

  “Come on.” Carrying a single plate and fork, Davin led the way to the couch, sat and waited for Alaric to join him, then offered both. Though he was still struggling to express himself, he knew Alaric would appreciate the sentiment behind this moment without an explanation. “I hope you like it.”

  Under his hopeful gaze, Alaric speared a shred of chicken and popped it in his mouth, chewing dutifully
. “It’s wonderful.”

  “Thank you.”

  “Open,” he murmured, bringing the next bite to Davin’s lips. Davin didn’t know which one of them moaned and he didn’t care. With Alaric’s gaze focused on his mouth, Davin watched his eyes, saw them go dark and stormy as he purposely licked his lips to savor the taste. “Good?”

  He had no idea. “Yes.”

  It was a decadent way to eat and it took nearly twice as long to finish the plate, but then that had been the whole purpose. To just sit and enjoy a meal by providing for each other. He could easily remember that first time, sitting in a little cafe on Key West. Davin had been having trouble focusing and couldn’t understand why they were out instead of in bed fucking. He might have pouted once and maybe sighed a few times before Alaric picked up his fork and hand fed him. If the plan was to shut him up, it backfired spectacularly. Because instead of bringing the meal into focus for Davin, it brought his mouth into focus for Alaric. Needless to say, they wound up back in bed for the rest of the trip.

  He rarely fed himself again.

  From his perch on the bed, Davin watched Alaric rifle through a bag of clothes for something to wear into town. “I should probably look at my cell phone.”

  “I’ll put it on the charger while we’re gone.”

  “’K. I’ll need my wallet.”

  “What for?”

  “Money, credit cards, identification—the usual shit that’s in someone’s wallet.”

  Money had never been a real bone of contention with them. Davin always worked hard, and at first, he was adamant about paying his share. Then Alaric pointed out, in his logical if not so subtle way, that only one of them could actually afford the things they were doing, and he wasn’t wrong. Once he got over the ding to his pride, Davin agreed to let Alaric pay for their extracurricular activities as long as they shared the living expenses equally.

  “It’s in the safe with the rest of your stuff.” Alaric gestured to the painting that probably cost more than his car and said, “You know the code.”

  When they were living together, Alaric had a safe where he kept some family jewelry and a few stacks of what he called emergency money. Davin had never put anything in that safe, nor had he ever opened it, but Alaric had insisted on giving him the code in case he needed cash.

  Davin couldn’t believe he would use the same code all these years later, but the safe popped open easily once he tapped in the six digits of the day they met. “You should change that up once in a while. For security and all.”

  Considering technology and security were Alaric’s business, Davin wasn’t expecting him to scoff. “You and I are the only ones who know the date.”

  Unsure what to say, he rooted around for his dead cell phone and set it on the dresser. Then he reached back in for the wallet and grimaced at the small badge tucked into the leather. He didn’t want to think about the job while he was here or what would be waiting for him when they went back.

  “You still with me?” Alaric asked when he stood there staring at the shield.

  “Where else would I be?” Pulling out his identification and a twenty-dollar bill, he set those on the dresser and tossed the wallet back in with the guns. Then he secured the door, slid the painting back into place, and turned to find Alaric watching him cautiously. “What?”

  “Nothing.”

  “Nothing, huh?” Davin didn’t believe that for a second. “Nothing, except you don’t like the idea of me being a cop.”

  “You’re right, I don’t like it at all,” Alaric agreed, leaving zero room for misunderstanding. “But it’s the path you’ve chosen, and I’ll support you if you decide to stick with it.”

  Decide to stick with it? Davin didn’t know when that became a question. “I’m thirty years old.”

  “What does that have to do with anything?”

  “It’s a little late in the game to switch careers.”

  “Because?”

  Davin drew a blank. Thirty wasn’t old, but wasn’t it too old to start over? “I don’t know.”

  “Well, maybe it’s something you should think about.”

  “Maybe I will.” But not now. Instead, he walked over to the bed and looked down at the board shorts and t-shirts Alaric laid out. “Are we going to be advertising Sanibel until we leave?”

  “The selection was not exactly what I’m used to.”

  That was an understatement of epic proportions. “No briefs?”

  “Hmmm, I knew there was something I was forgetting.” More like deliberately forgotten if his smirk was anything to go by. But it was just like Alaric to ‘accidentally’ make them go commando for a whole vacation and then use it as an excuse to edge him until he was begging to come wherever they were.

  When Alaric would have shucked his swim trunks, Davin reached out, staying his hands. “What’s wrong?”

  “I’m trying to live in the moment and look forward, but I keep getting lost in the memories.”

  “Do you think I’m not? Every time I look at you, I remember something wonderful, and it only strengthens my desire to build a future with you.”

  Davin didn’t know when the tables had turned, but it seemed Alaric found more sappy words while all he could think about was sex. “Do you remember our first time? We were so clueless. Fumbling with each other’s clothes, not quite sure where to start or how to touch.”

  “I remember being smoother than that.”

  “You got with the program a little quicker than I did, but I wouldn’t have called our first time smooth.”

  “Aren’t you supposed to fawn over me?”

  “That first time,” he continued, ignoring Alaric’s snort in favor of tracing the skin just above his waistband. Fascinated by the way it heated beneath his fingertip, he followed the line of fabric and admitted, “I was so nervous, but I remember lying on your bed, watching as you went to get the condoms and being blown away by your body. So long and strong and tan. I just wanted to touch you all over.”

  “As I recall, you did.”

  “Eventually.” Davin flattened his hand against Alaric’s abdomen and was rewarded when the muscles bunched against his palm. “My hands were shaking like crazy, remember? I wasn’t sure how to touch you, where to touch you, what you would like…and then I put my hand right here and I felt you react. I became addicted to getting a reaction.”

  “That works both ways.”

  “Oh, I know. You were quite good at finding out my secrets. Even the ones buried so deep, I didn’t know they existed.”

  Alaric cupped his jaw and rubbed a thumb across his lower lip. “If you could see yourself right now, see the look in your eyes, you’d understand why I was always dragging you off to the bedroom. How many plans did we miss because you gave me just that look?”

  “I never complained about missed plans.” And he wouldn’t now, if Alaric was willing to let him explore.

  “No, you didn’t.” Alaric leaned in to kiss him gently and Davin knew, before he said the words, that they weren’t going back to bed. “But today we’re going to get dressed and go out like we planned.”

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Alaric

  “I think you were being generous calling this a town,” Davin teased as they parked and peered out the window. The two-block stretch of shops and restaurants was more of a stopover then a town, but it was good for a stroll.

  “It’s quaint. Come on, let’s go see what crap they’re selling.”

  They were wandering through the shops, laughing over souvenirs and tourist t-shirts, when they heard a shout that had them both turning. “Ric, I thought I recognized you!”

  Alaric bit back a groan when he recognized the son of one of his father’s golfing buddies making a beeline across the shop, arms outstretched and fingers wiggling dramatically. Beside him, Davin made a choking sound and started to step forward, as if he was going to get between. He appreciated that his detective was about to defend him, but there was no way those grubbing fingers we
re getting anywhere near Davin.

  Like the Bennetts, the Sinclairs were ‘old Miami money.’ Unlike him, Michael was content to live off his trust funds and his parents’ hard work. He was also an inappropriate flirt, a notorious gossip, and status-hungry leech. Alaric had no patience for men like him and no interest in being hugged just so Michael could tell everyone they shared a ‘moment.’

  “Davin, you remember Michael Sinclair, don’t you?”

  There was a small moment of satisfaction when Michael’s forward momentum faltered, and Alaric didn’t bother hiding his satisfied smirk when he began sputtering. “Davin…the Davin…your Davin?”

  Over the top much, asshole? “One in the same, yes.”

  “Oh my god!” Michael looked from him to Davin, held a hand to his chest, and declared, “We thought you fell off the face of the earth! Wherever did you go, darling? How could you leave a hunk like Ric?”

  “Hmm.” And because he was the only one who could get away with it, Davin leered at Alaric and licked his lips. “He is a hunk, isn’t he?”

  “You nearly ruined him for the rest of us,” Michael whined, demanding their attention. “He was such a bear to live with, but we did our best, as his friends, to get him out as often as possible.”

  Davin turned that considering stare on Michael and Alaric wondered if he was sizing him up for a body bag. “That’s what good friends do.”

  “Right? He was so broody and unsocial, so un-Ric-like. But now you’re back.” Like they weren’t the only ones in the store, Michael leaned in close and whispered, “Like back, back?”

  “Just like that,” Alaric cut in before Michael crossed the line.

  “Well, that’s just fantastic!” Eyes wide and body vibrating with excitement, he added, “Wait until everyone hears! Are you both staying on the island for New Years? There’s that big party at the Wards tomorrow night and, of course, you’re both invited.”