She wiped her face with an oversized sleeve. I-I couldn’t sleep last night. It’s like I knew something was wrong. I even put his sweatshirt on to feel closer to him.”
“He knows you’re pulling for him, honey.” Rad squeezed her shoulder. “That will help him get through this.”
“But how will I get through it?” she whimpered. “He’s the strong one, the one I lean on. I need him.”
Rad pulled her back into his arms. “You’ll find out how strong you are. Wynn knows he can count on you.”
Heather sniffled for a few more minutes before turning to a table behind the couch for a tissue. “I was getting ready to make some coffee.” She dabbed her eyes. “I’m sure you could use some.”
“I’ll get it. You take it easy.”
Rad strode into the kitchen and filled the container with water. As he dumped it into the coffeemaker, his hand shook.
“You’re as worried as I am.” Heather’s voice came from just behind him.
Rad forced a laugh as he measured out the coffee, but he didn’t turn around. He didn’t want Heather to see his face. “I guess we’ll have to fight over him when he gets back.”
He hoped his tone sounded more convincing than he felt. Pops had not sounded very optimistic, and as he thought back on the conversation, he wondered if he had actually been preparing him for the worst.
“I hope the phone rings soon.” Heather walked back and forth beside the kitchen table, her oversized slippers making a scuffing sound on the hardwood floor.
Rad nodded. She was a military wife—almost anyway—and knew a phone call would mean he was still alive. The last thing either one of them wanted to hear was the sound of the doorbell.
“How long will we have to wait do you think?” Heather took two mugs out of the cupboard and set them on the counter. Her voice sounded calm, but her hands shook and her eyes were brimming again.
“It’s hard to say. Waiting is going to be the hardest part.” Rad didn’t want to say it, but he wasn’t sure Pops was even out of harm’s way when he had called. The connection was bad, but he could have sworn he’d heard sporadic gunfire. It would be just like Pops to send word so Rad could have a head start in protecting Heather from the media.
Rad glanced at the small television sitting on top of the refrigerator. His jaw clenched when he saw it was on and turned to a news channel. Instead of following his first instinct of ripping it out of the wall and throwing it out the door, he turned to take Heather’s arm and lead her from the room. But something on the screen caught his eye and he stopped.
“What’s that about?” He nodded toward the TV just as the reporter covering the story mentioned the name “the former Angela Powers.”
Heather looked at the television and her expression turned to one of disdain. “Haven’t you heard? It’s going to be the biggest society event of the year.”
Rad shook his head as he stared at the picture of Angie walking out of a nightclub holding hands with Joey Stanton, the lead singer for one of the hottest rock bands in the country. “She’s marrying him?”
“Umm-hmm.” Heather nodded. “She’s been divorced for more than a month now. I’m surprised it took her so long.”
For the first time, Rad saw the trace of a smile on Heather’s face. He led her back toward the living room, pleased that her thoughts had been diverted from Wynn, even if it was only for a few minutes. “I wonder if we’re invited,” he mused.
That made Heather laugh. “Don’t hold your breath. I get the feeling you’re no longer on her ‘A’ list.”
“Well, I wish her future husband luck anyway.”
“No you don’t.”
Yes, I do.” There was no humor in his tone now. “Seriously, he’ll need it.”
Heather smiled pensively, but the amusement soon drained from her expression as her thoughts returned to Wynn. When she raised her gaze, rekindled pain flickered there despite obvious efforts to stay strong. “Thanks for being here, Rad.”
He ignored the comment. “What did you have planned for today?”
“I’m supposed to go into the office at nine.”
“What’s the number?” Rad walked over to the phone. “I’ll tell them you won’t be in.”
Heather wiped tears from her eyes as quickly as they formed. “Maybe I should go. Maybe it will keep my mind off things.”
“You really think you’ll be able to get any work done?”
Heather shook her head while biting a fingernail. “No. You’re right.” She rubbed her temples. “I can’t think straight.”
Rad wrote down the number and glanced at his watch. It was too early to get hold of anyone now. He’d wait another hour.
“Really, Rad. I don’t know how to thank you for this.”
Before he could say anything, the phone rang. They both froze.
“Do you want me to get it?” Rad put his hand on her shoulder to calm her.
“N-no. I’ll get it.”
“Hello? Yes, this is Heather Kane.” Her voice shook only slightly.
“Yes.”
Rad watched her swallow hard, and then her chin began to tremble.
“No, I don’t understand. Hold on.” She handed Rad the phone and walked away with her hands covering her face, her shoulders heaving with the sobs she tried to suppress.
“This is Michael Radcliff.” His voice sounded calm and commanding, even though it was not what he was feeling. “I’m here on behalf of Miss Kane.”
After a few questions about his relationship, the voice on the phone explained what they had already told Heather.
Matthew Wynn had been hit with shrapnel from an RPG close to his spine. He was in a drug-induced coma and on life support.
“Is he going to make it?” Rad suddenly felt like Heather. Unable to hear. Unable to comprehend.
The person on the other end of the line ignored the question. “He’s being flown to Landstuhl this afternoon. You’ll probably get an update from there.”
Then the line went dead.
Rad stood unmoving, still holding the phone in his hand.
“What am I going to do, Rad?” Heather’s voice beside him made him realize he was not the only one in the room. She laid her head on his chest and wrapped her arms around him. He could feel her whole body tremble. “I don’t know what to do.”
“Be strong, Heather.” Rad put the phone down and wrapped his arms around her. “He’d want you to be strong.”
Rad thought back to that night in the car when he’d discovered he’d lost Lauren again. He wondered how he would have made it through without Wynn and Heather holding him up. Now she was the one who was inconsolable, sobbing hysterically at the thought she might lose Wynn, and he didn’t know what to do or say.
“I can’t live without him. I don’t even want to try.”
The facts had finally hit her. Hard as she’d tried to stay strong, the truth of the matter was Wynn might not be coming home, and even if he did, things were going to be different. He helped her over to the sofa to sit down again, afraid her trembling legs would give out.
“What would Wynn do if he knew you were this upset?” He wiped a tear from her cheek with his thumb.
“He’d say, ‘Heather, get a grip. Time to cowboy up.’” She smiled at Rad through her tears. “That’s what you’re thinking too, right?”
Rad shook his head. “I’m not saying this is going to be easy, Heather. But worrying—”
“Won’t solve anything,” she finished for him.
“I’ll call Annie if you want.”
Heather nodded, and then stood. “No. Maybe not. Not yet. It will just make her worry about Pops.”
She began wandering around the living room, fluffing pillows and rearranging knickknacks as she talked, as if that somehow helped her think. “Let’s wait until we get some real news. And that the rest of them are safe.”
Rad nodded, amazed at her strength. Wynn had always said the ones at home had the tougher job. He was right.
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Heather moved toward the small room off the living room. “When he gets home, he might have to sleep in your room if he can’t make it up the stairs. Maybe we should start getting it ready.”
Rad strode to the doorway of the room he always used when he was unfit to drive home. It was really Wynn’s exercise room and Heather’s sewing room, all mixed up with some spare boxes of books and a fairly comfortable sofa. He’d spent more nights than he cared to remember—or could remember—in this room.
“Might as well wait until we know what’s going on.” Rad glanced around the room, assessing what would need to be done. “I’ll be sleeping here the next few nights, so don’t plan on kicking me out yet.”
Heather walked up and threw her arms around him again. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to stay.”
“No arguments. I’m staying.” He put one arm around her waist. “You don’t know what time of the day or night you might hear something.”
She nodded against him. “You’re right. I can’t do this without you.”
“How about some breakfast?” Rad let her go and headed toward the kitchen. “I make a mean omelet.”
Heather smiled through her tears again. “Really? You cook?”
“Don’t tell me Wynn never told you of my prowess in the kitchen.”
Heather followed him and showed him where the pans were. “No. He might have mentioned your prowess elsewhere, but definitely not in the kitchen.”
Rad chuckled. “That’s logical, I suppose.” He grabbed the eggs out of the refrigerator. “He was probably afraid if you knew I could find my way around a kitchen, you’d make him learn.”
“I don’t care if he can’t cook.” Heather’s chin began to tremble again. “I just want him back.”
Rad put the eggs down and wrapped his arms around her again. “We’ll get him back, honey. And someday we’ll laugh about how scared we were for him.”
Heather pulled away and searched his face with a panicked expression. “You’re scared too?”
Rad closed his eyes and pursed his lips. Damn, why can’t I find the right words?
“I just wish it were me, Heather.” He put a hand on each shoulder. “I’d give anything to switch places with him so neither one of you had to go through this.”
“You’re a good friend. Thanks for being here.” She paused a moment. “He really looks up to you, you know? Like an older brother.”
“I’m not that much older.” Rad turned and put the pan on the stove. “Anyway, seriously,” he said, glancing back at her. “He’s one hell of a man—and a soldier. He’s going to make a great husband too.”
She smiled and bit her lip, blinking back a fresh set of tears. “And father.”
“Yeah.” Rad nodded and smiled. “And father.”
Heather took a deep breath and changed the subject. “How’s your leg doing anyway? Are you sure you don’t need any help?”
“I got it. Just relax.”
“You still in a lot of pain?”
“No, it’s not bad.” Rad turned and glanced at her over his shoulder. “Except during PT. Those women thrive on torture.”
Heather sat down at the table. “Wynn said you got an award or something for… what you did. He didn’t tell me much about it, except that it’s a pretty big deal.”
Rad noticed she didn’t mention the rescue or Lauren’s name, and he was grateful. He’d gladly give up every medal and commendation he’d ever received to have her back in his arms. He decided to change the subject.
“I talked to McDunna. If things keep going the way they are, I should be ready for the next deployment.”
“Why would you want to go risk your life for those people?” Heather’s voice was loud and angry. She put her head down on the table and sobbed. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t talk like that.”
“I don’t do it for them, Heather.” Rad walked over and put his hand on her shoulder. “I do it for you and your future kids.”
“I know. You guys are so good at what you do.” She took a deep breath. “The country is lucky to have you.”
Rad turned back to the stove. “Wynn is like a brother to me. You know that.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“It’s going to be hard the next few days, but don’t let yourself think about the what-ifs. It doesn’t do any good to worry about what we can’t control.”
“You’re right.” Heather nodded. “We’ll deal with whatever hand God deals us.”
Chapter 33
Heather stood outside the door for a moment trying to calm her nerves and prepare herself for what she would see. She had been given advice on what to say and do, but now that the actual moment had arrived when she would see Wynn for the first time since his injury, she couldn’t remember any of it. Earlier she had felt nervous, worried, and excited. Now she felt just plain terrified.
Taking a deep breath, she grimaced at the medicinal smell that greeted her, and then pushed the door open. The room she stepped into was not nearly as intimidating as she feared it would be. Wynn lay on a bed with his eyes closed, looking as if he might be asleep. The IV bag at the head of his bed dripped silently while a single small machine beside him made a gentle beeping noise that was almost comforting. Pretending a calmness she did not feel, Heather moved toward the bed and wrapped her fingers around his hand.
Wynn did not respond for a few long moments, but at last his eyes fluttered open and slowly focused on her.
“What are you doing here?” His voice was weak, but there was no denying the anger in it.
“I’m here to see you, Wynn.”
“You’ve seen me. Now go.” He turned his head away. “I don’t want you to see me like this.”
Heather knew he would be angry, that he would feel vulnerable and helpless. His vibrant, muscular body was not accustomed to being waited on and cared for. He detested weakness and could not accept that he would have to rely on others while his body healed.
To reassure him, she sat on the side of the bed, leaned down, and wrapped her arms around his neck. “I’ve been so worried about you. I’m not going anywhere.”
Heather heard the door open behind her and knew it was Rad. They’d come to the hospital together, but he’d pretended he had someone to talk to down the hall to give her time to have a few moments alone.
Even though he now stared at the wall, Wynn must have heard someone enter the room too. He turned his head and glared up at Rad.
“Great. You’re here for the pity party too?”
Rad gazed at Heather, now sitting up and staring at the wall, and apparently noticed the distraught look on her face.
“If there’s a pity party, I’m thinking you’re the only one in attendance, my man.” Rad leaned toward the bed. “You need to cowboy up, bro.”
“Easy for you to say.” Wynn swallowed hard. “Standing on your own two feet.”
Rad casually removed his jacket and laid it on a chair. “I seem to recall I was exactly where you are not so long ago.”
“And you weren’t a very good patient either,” Heather chimed in.
“Thanks for the support.” Rad glanced over at her before turning his attention back to Wynn. “You all messed up on pain medication or what? You’re not making much sense.”
Wynn removed his gaze from the ceiling for a moment to cast an angry glance at Rad before returning to impassive coldness.
Heather squeezed Wynn’s hand again. “I know you’re probably worried about the wedding, but don’t. We’ll just postpone it until you’re ready.”
Wynn turned slowly toward her. “No wedding.” His voice was firm and final.
A sudden hush filled the room as if a hurricane wind had come through and sucked it clean of life. Even Rad appeared unable to find a way to break the silence or lighten the mood.
“I’m not making you go through with it, Heather.” Wynn pulled his hand away and stared at the ceiling. “I’m letting you off the hook.”
“Who says I want off the
hook?” Heather bit her lip to keep from crying. She had known he was going to take his injuries hard. The doctor had warned her he would be angry and depressed. But this was worse than she expected. “I agreed to spend the rest of my life with you, and that’s what I plan to do.”
“That was before—” Wynn turned his head away and did not finish.
Rad stepped forward and put a hand on Wynn’s shoulder. “I think Heather has pretty much made up her mind on this, dude. You might as well accept it. You’re stuck with each other.”
“No. She didn’t bargain for this.” Wynn remained defiant. “She didn’t plan to spend the rest of her life taking care of a—”
“For better or worse.” Heather interrupted him and squeezed his hand. “Remember?”
“We didn’t say our vows yet,” Wynn answered sullenly, his eyes dark with emotion. “And like I said, you’re off the hook.”
Heather raised her gaze to Rad and blinked away the tears as hopelessness consumed her.
“Man, I sure could use a cup of coffee,” he said calmly.
Heather stared at him a moment, then jumped to her feet, taking his hint to leave the two of them alone. “Me too. I’ll go get us some.”
“How about you, Wynn?” Rad asked.
“None for him.” Heather already had her purse slung over her shoulder. “Even if it’s allowed, caffeine makes him irritable.”
Rad waited for the door to close behind him, but when it didn’t he glanced around to see Heather motioning to him from the doorway.
“Don’t say anything about the… you know,” she whispered when he walked over, pointing to her stomach.
Rad nodded, and then said in a loud voice. “That’s right. Two creams. No sugar.”
As soon as the door closed with a soft click, Wynn spoke. “Don’t even bother, dude.”
Rad pulled a chair closer to the bed. “Don’t bother what?”
“Don’t bother trying to change my mind.” He opened his eyes and gave Rad a withering glance before closing them again. “I know how you two operate.”
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