by Imogen Wells
“I…love you, Jamie, and tell your…dad too, okay,” she stutters out as her eyes cloud over and her last breath leaves her.
“No, no, no. Mum, mum, please I need you. Help. Somebody fucking help me,” I scream and beg, and then I begin compressions, all the while begging her to come back to me.
I don’t know how long I do it for, but eventually, someone wraps their arms around me, attempting to pull me away, and I fight like a fucking wildcat to stay beside my mum.
“Jamie, it’s me, Seb. I got you, baby. I got you,” he whispers in my ear as he picks me up in his arms. I bury my head in his neck and fucking break.
I cry, I scream, I lash out, but he never lets me go, and when my body finally tires and I fall silent, he just keeps holding me. Someone wraps a blanket around me, but it brings me no warmth at all. I feel sick. I feel numb.
I hear voices around me, shouting, harried voices that mean nothing to me and blow over me like a fall breeze.
I’m aware of someone checking me over, and then they are gone, only to be replaced with the sound of a man roaring in pain, and I know that sound. I know that pain, that hurt, because I feel it too.
“Where is she? Where’s my daughter?”
“She’s fine, Dom. She’s with Seb getting checked by the paramedics, which you should be doing.”
“I don’t need a fucking paramedic, Rick. I just lost my fucking wife and Jamie lost her mum, and all I need is to see my daughter, so move out of the damn way.”
I feel Seb, shifting position beneath me, and then he sets me down, and I realise we are inside a car.
“Stay here, I’ll be back in a second, okay?” He kisses my head before walking away towards the raised voices of Rick and my dad.
“If you want to see Jamie, I suggest you calm the fuck down, Dom. I understand your pain, but she doesn’t need to see this.”
“You think you can keep me away from my daughter? Who the fuck do you think you are, and what do you even know about the pain she’s going through?”
I get up out of the car, and slowly step toward where they are standing beside another car. As I get closer, I see Seb resting a hand on my dad’s shoulder as he continues to talk to him in a quiet voice.
“Da—” My throat closes up, and I swallow before trying again. “D…ad. Dad,” I manage to say, still a little croaky.
“Jamie. God, baby girl,” he says, jogging over to me and hugging me tightly. “I’m so sorry,” he whispers into my hair as a sob breaks free from him.
“I should have tried harder to save her, Dad. I’m sorry I—”
He pushes me back, so he can see my face. “Hey, no, Jamie, it’s not your fault. Your mother did what she did because she loved you, loved us, and would have done anything to keep you safe. You have nothing to be sorry for.” He pulls me back into another hug, and I wrap my arms around his waist, desperately holding onto him as tears slip down my face. My dad’s voice rumbles through his chest as he tells Seb to get me out of here.
He kisses me on the head before handing me over to Seb, who wraps an arm around me and leads me back to the car we were in. This time, I climb into the front as Seb opens the door for me, and then he jumps into the driver’s seat.
“Don’t you need to get your arm looked at,” I say as I see the blood soaking his shirt and wonder what happened to his jacket.
“I’m good, already had it checked,” he tells me as he starts the car and drives away. I know he’s lying because he hasn’t left my side, and though I may have not been fully compos mentis, I sure as hell don’t remember the paramedic checking him.
I let him think he’s got away with it, but when we get to wherever we’re going, I’ll be checking him. I rest my head on the window as the city lights speed by, and as we leave them behind, my eyes drift closed with images of my mother flashing through my mind.
Something touching my cheek wakes me a while later, and I open my eyes to see Seb crouched down beside me.
“Hey, Firefly,” his voice is warm and drifts over me as my brain slowly registers where we are. “Come on, let’s get inside.” He reaches in, releasing my seatbelt, and I go to step out, but he stops me. He lifts me from the car, and I see why as his feet crunch across the gravel toward the house. I lost my shoes somewhere after my m— I shut the thought down.
Inside, Seb lowers me to the floor, and I get my first look at the house. As I look around, a woman comes rushing down the hall, stopping as she sees Seb and me.
“Mr Roberts, we weren’t expecting you back tonight.”
“I’m sorry, Margaret, there wasn’t time for me to call ahead.” He turns to me. “Jamie, this is Margaret.”
“Good evening, Miss.” Her eyes scan me before going back to Seb. “Do you want me to call Dr Wallis?”
Seb shakes his head. “No, thank you, Margaret. We’re both fine.”
“Don’t listen to him, Margaret.” He turns his eyes to me, but I ignore him. “He needs his arm looking at, but there’s no need for a doctor. If you have a first aid kit, that would be great.”
“Yes, Miss, of course,” she says, spinning on her heels to go and get what I asked for.
“Margaret,” I call out to her, and she stops to look back at me. “Call me Jamie, please.” She smiles brightly before hurrying away. I look over to Seb, who is watching me with a cocky smile on his face. “What? You didn’t honestly think I believed you when you said you got checked, did you?” Seb laughs, shaking his head as he grabs my hand and leads me up the magnificent staircase directly in front of us.
We enter a room on the right-hand side of the stairs, but I wouldn’t call it a room. It’s more like a suite in a top class hotel. I look around as Seb moves to start the fire up, and by the time Margaret returns with the first aid kit, the fire is blazing, and the earlier chill has gone.
I thank Margaret, and Seb asks her to bring some tea and sandwiches. Once she’s gone, I tell him to strip, earning me a small chuckle. He takes off his shirt, wincing slightly as the material has stuck to his arm.
I’m not surprised to see the first aid kit has everything I need and then some, and as I get my first look at Seb’s arm, I’m damn grateful for it.
“Shit, Seb. You should have got this seen to.” I step round him to look at the back of his arm, and I’m even more glad to see an exit wound. “You’re bloody lucky this didn’t hit a bone but went straight through.” I look up at him.
“I know. It’s not the first time I’ve been shot, Jamie.”
“Yeah, I know that, but still.” I’ve felt the few scars hidden beneath his tattoos, and I knew what they were, but hearing him confirm it makes my heart beat erratically.
Brushing my thoughts aside, I make quick work of cleaning and suturing, and I’ve just finished dressing the wounds when Margaret knocks the door before entering, carrying a tray of drinks and sandwiches.
Placing the tray down, she asks if there will be anything else, and when Seb tells her no, she wishes us goodnight, closing the door behind her.
I tidy away the first aid kit, and when I’m done, I pull off the gloves I wore while seeing to Seb, and I’m met with bloodstained hands. My mother’s blood, my dad’s blood, Seb’s blood and even my own blood. Tears prick at my eyes as a finger beneath my chin, lifts my head up, and I look into the eyes of the man I love.
“Firefly?”
“It’s okay. I’m okay,” I say trying to look away, but Seb doesn’t let me.
“I know that’s not true, but for now, let’s get cleaned up, and afterwards we’ll talk.” I nod as he places a kiss to the tip of my nose before getting to his feet.
In the shower, Seb washes me while I try not to look at the pink stained water as it runs down my body, and when he’s finished, I take the soap and do the same for him, even though he tries to protest. I run my hands over his gorgeous body as I wash away the blood, dirt and grime from his skin, and I thank god that I didn’t lose him too.
Wrapping me in the fluffiest towel I’ve
ever felt, he leads me to the bedroom, and I almost die when I see the size of his bed.
“Fuck, that’s huge,” I exclaim, taking in the giant four-poster that looks big enough to sleep 6 adults.
“That’s what she said,” Seb retorts, and I slap him in the stomach. “Hey,” he says with a laugh. “Go get into bed, and I’ll grab the food and drinks.”
I didn’t feel much like eating, but Seb insisted I eat at least one whole sandwich, which I just about managed, and drink my tea. Now, we are lying in bed facing one another with only the moon lighting the room. He reaches out a hand and touches my cheek where I know there’s a bruise from Marcus’ hits.
“If he wasn’t already dead, you know I’d fucking kill him for touching you, right?”
I nod. “Yeah, I know.” I can’t keep the sadness from my voice. I have a lot of questions I need answers to, but there’s only one I want the answer to tonight. “What did you say to my dad?”
He takes a deep breath, sighing heavily before saying, “He was angry because I told him he couldn’t see you till he calmed down, and as I’m sure you can imagine, he wasn’t impressed, so I told him about my mum.” He pauses, and now it’s my turn to reach out to him, entwining our fingers together. “She killed herself just after my eighteenth birthday. I didn’t understand at the time why she hadn’t done it before that. My dad isn’t a good guy, Jamie. He wasn’t a good husband, and he certainly wasn’t a good father. When they read her will, the solicitor told me my mum had opened a trust fund in my name, and that my dad wasn’t allowed to touch it. It was iron-clad, she’d made sure of that.
“Then I understood why she’d waited. I could never leave before because I wasn’t an adult and had no means to support myself if Dad cut me off, so she’d waited and hidden the trust fund from him too. I know what it’s like to feel guilt over losing a parent who did it to protect you, so I told your dad he needed to calm down and be the father you believed him to be. I’m pretty sure if Rick, or I, had let him see you before that he would have poured his own guilt onto you, and there was no way I was letting that happen. Aside from the fact that what happened wasn’t your fault, your dad’s own guilt would have destroyed him and you. Trust me, I know.”
“Is that what happened with your dad?”
“Not exactly. Me and my dad never really got on, and when mum died, he blamed me. All the while, his own guilt was eating away at him.”
“I’m sorry about your mum, Seb. It sounds like she was an amazing woman.”
“Yeah, she was. Too good for my old man, that’s for sure. It’s just a shame she never got to experience what real love felt like,” he says with a shrug.
I shuffle closer to him, running my free hand up his chest. “She had your love, and I think that’s kind of special. She would be very proud of who you are, Seb.” I lean forward, and my lips meet his in, what should have been, a tender kiss, but I can’t help deepening it and hoping he can feel my love for him.
Breaking away, I spin in his arms, and he pulls me back against him. I relax, and although I’m mentally and physically exhausted, I struggle to sleep.
I think about my mum and what she went through because of Marcus. I can’t believe she kept it all to herself. And how long had she believed that I was Marcus’ daughter? God, so many questions.
I try to shove them all aside, and eventually, after a couple of hours, I finally drift off.
Forty-Five
Jamie
“Do you want anymore, Jamie?” Jay asks, and when I shake my head no, he picks up my plate, putting it in the sink. I thank him and tell him I’m going to get dressed.
I slept like shit, but I did at least get a couple of hours before I dragged myself out of bed this morning. And when I eventually made it to the kitchen, after getting a little lost on the way, I found Jay there, cooking breakfast. For a minute, I thought last night was all a bad dream, but then Seb strolled in carrying my bag from his and Jay’s apartment, and as soon as I spotted the bandage peeking out from beneath the sleeve of his t-shirt, I knew it wasn’t.
Up in Seb’s room, I get washed and dressed, knowing that my dad and the rest of the guys will be arriving soon. I even manage to put a little makeup on, partly to hide the bruise on my cheek and the bags under my eyes, but mostly because I feel like it’s putting on war paint, and I need to feel brave today. I need to have something to hide behind, to protect me, while I ask all the questions that have been churning over in my mind.
Having already discovered Seb’s stunning lounge this morning when I got lost, I have no trouble finding it again, I mean it’s right next to the front door for god’s sake. What I do have though, is trouble walking in there.
“Jamie, are you okay, dear?” Margaret’s voice echoes from behind me, and I spin round.
“Oh, err…yes. I guess so,” I reply, but even I can hear how pitiful it was.
“Can I offer you some advice from an old lady?” I nod. “Listen to me, sometimes the thing we most fear hearing can turn out to be the exact thing we need to hear. If you don’t go in there and ask all the questions and get all the answers you seek, the not knowing will be the thing that destroys you more than the grief.” She gives me a knowing smile. “I don’t doubt it will be difficult to hear, but God never gives you more than you can handle, although it never seems that way at the time,” she says with a raised brow. “Your mother, she did what any mother would do for their child, and I know it hurts now, but in time, and no doubt when you have a family of your own, you’ll come to see and understand why.” She steps toward me, wiping a tear that I had let slip from my eye away with her thumb. She pats my cheek affectionately before nodding and walking away.
I take a moment to let her words sink in and gather myself, and then taking a deep breath, I push open the door and walk in. The first pair of eyes I meet are deep caramel ones, that light up as I walk forward. When he reaches me, he grasps my face bringing me in for a kiss that sends a tingle all the way to my toes.
“Hey,” I say quietly when he releases me.
“Hey, Firefly. You okay?”
“I’m good.” I turn my gaze to the rest of the room to see everyone here, even a couple of faces I don’t know. I step out of Seb’s arms to hug my dad and Cam, who is here with Jamison. Before we can get started Jamison, starts wailing and Cam steps out to feed him.
I have no idea where to start, so I’m grateful that Rick steps up. He introduces me to a man I’ve not seen before as Ray, the DI that’s been helping them, and then he introduces me to a woman I’ve definitely seen before. She’s the PI my dad hired, Vanessa Markham.
Rick starts by telling us how he discovered that Marcus owned Tempest. It seems that Jay’s last chat with Natalia finally made her change her mind, and after giving a statement to Ray, and even though she couldn’t give them a name, they were able to get what they needed after they arrested Mark. He caved almost instantly when he was offered a plea bargain by the prosecution and named Marcus as the owner.
My dad’s fall out with Marcus two years ago was over his ownership of the haulage company MWB and their link to the trafficking of girls. Up until then my dad had no idea Marcus even owned the company, and when he found out, they had a huge row. But things had been strained before that after Dad passed over Marcus in favour of someone else for promotion.
When Dad received the first letter it came with the DNA test results, including ones that claimed I wasn’t Dominic’s daughter.
“I found those letters in your office, but there was only your test results?”
“That’s because your mother took them. After you visited the house that day and saw Travis there, she knew you’d come looking. She didn’t want you to find those results, Jamie, not until she’d had another test done to confirm it either way.”
“And did she?” I ask, holding my breath as I wait for him to answer. I know my mum said that Marcus lied, but I won’t believe it until I see it with my own eyes. As if my dad knows this, he gets to his
feet, and taking an envelope from his pocket, he hands it over to me.
My fingers tremble as I pull the paper free and sob when I read the words that confirm Dominic is my father. I screw the paper up in my hand and launch myself into my dad’s arm. He groans as I hit his shoulder, and I remember he got shot too.
“Shit, sorry, Dad,” I say, stepping back to Seb. Dad laughs as he tells me it was worth it.
“Did you know?” I ask Dad, knowing I don’t need to say more.
“No, not until just recently. She always told me that she was attacked on her way home from work, and I never had a reason to believe otherwise.” I hear the pain in his voice, and my heart breaks for my mum and my dad because now they will never be able to make up for the lost time. “It’s okay, Jamie,” he tells me, and I know that’s his way of telling me that everything was right between them again before last night.
I sit back down beside Seb, locking out hands together. “How did Marcus even get involved in trafficking in the first place?” I ask.
“That we don’t know yet. It’s clear that even before he left the country and with him owning MWB, he was already involved in some way. We know that after he left here, he did travel for a while before arriving in Mexico, but after that, we can’t find anything.”
I nod, accepting that there will be some questions I might never get answers to, and it reminds me of what Margaret said about the not knowing. In this instance, I can live with the not knowing because I won’t be losing any sleep over him.
“And how did Jasper fit into all this?” I feel Seb bristle at my question.
Rick looks to Seb before answering. “Based on what Marcus said about Jasper’s wife, we believe Marcus murdered Jasper’s wife, Katie, after Jasper refused to help him anymore. What Marcus didn’t consider when he told Jasper to befriend you was how much you looked like Katie. We think Jasper got cold feet about what Marcus wanted to do to you, and after the incident at Rosco’s he refused to play any further part in it.”