by A. E. Radley
Alice couldn’t believe it. She knew she’d done it, and she’d do it again in a second. But she still couldn’t actually believe her actions. She looked at Rosie, safely tucked up asleep and knew she’d made the right decision. Even if she had, presumably, nearly died.
“The doctor wants to keep you in overnight to keep an eye on you. Pretty bad smoke inhalation, he said,” Hannah explained.
Guilt washed over her and threatened to push her back into a murky unconsciousness. “I’m sorry,” Alice whispered.
Hannah looked at her as if she had grown another head. “What for?”
“For Rosie being in there. I should have been looking after her.” Alice couldn’t believe that she’d been standing in the playground sipping coffee and chatting with Lucy while a fire had started taking hold of the building and Colin and Rosie were roaming the library.
“Don’t be ridiculous. Kids do dumb shit. Trust me, I did tons of stuff. You can’t be expected to watch every child all the time. And, beyond that, you nearly died trying to save her.” Tears fell down Hannah’s cheeks. “I will never be able to thank you enough for saving my little girl.”
“It’s my fault,” Alice repeated.
“No, it isn’t,” Hannah said firmly. “You did nothing wrong. In fact, you’re a hero.”
Alice tried to laugh, but it hurt. “I’m not,” she argued. Her eyelids were starting to feel heavy.
“You are. Now, stop arguing. You’re supposed to be resting.”
Alice could feel herself fading. She didn’t know if it was exhaustion or painkillers, but she didn’t want to go just yet. She feared that when she woke up, Hannah wouldn’t be there, and she needed to talk to her. Needed to explain.
Hannah seemed to sense her impending unconsciousness and perched on the edge of the bed, one hand holding hers and the other running fingers through her hair.
Her last thought before she drifted off was that her hair must have been disgusting.
30 PART OF A FAMILY
Hannah softly closed the hospital room’s door behind her. She held Rosie in her arms, the dozing girl still not fully awake.
She wished she could have properly spoken to Alice. There were so many things that needed to be said. But it was the wrong time. Alice was disorientated and exhausted, and it was so late that Rosie needed to be in bed, not slumped in a hospital chair. Hannah decided she’d come back as soon as was practical and issue a grovelling apology.
“How is she?”
Hannah jumped a little. Lucy Gibson walked down the corridor towards her.
“She’s asleep. She woke up for a few moments, but she’s exhausted,” Hannah explained. “I better get going.”
She tried to sidestep Lucy.
“Wait a second.” The woman put her hands up to stop Hannah from getting past.
“What do you want?” Hannah levelled her with a death glare.
“For this to end,” Lucy said simply.
Hannah adjusted her grip on Rosie and let out a sigh. She didn’t want to do this now. It was late. Everyone was tired and emotional.
“What do you mean?” Hannah asked. She suspected that she knew what Lucy meant, but she wasn’t about to embarrass herself by making another assumption.
“This… whatever it is. You separate yourself from everyone in Fairlight. I know things have been hard for you—”
Hannah scoffed. “Are you kidding me? Of course, I keep to myself. You all hate me. I hear the gossip!”
“Everyone gossips about everyone,” Lucy said. “You’re not special or unique. And I know your life has been crap, and I know you have a problem when it comes to most people in town, my sister included, and I know it’s well-deserved. But this isn’t school anymore. We’re all adults. People try to reach out to you, but you push them away. That needs to change, for her.” Lucy gestured her head towards Rosie.
“Why bring this up now?”
“Because I have you trapped in a corridor,” Lucy said. “You avoid me all the time. I don’t get a chance to even say hello to you. We’re not against you, Hannah. A lot happened in the past, but it is in the past. If you don’t want to forgive your ex-classmates, I get that, but there are a lot of us who want you to be a part of our community. We nearly lost people today. There aren’t many of us in Fairlight, and I know you don’t feel you’re a part of it, but you are. Whether you like it or not.”
Hannah opened and then closed her mouth. She wanted to argue, wanted to fight Lucy’s calm words, but she couldn’t. In her heart, she knew that Lucy Gibson had never actually done anything to her. She was just a member of the larger Fairlight community which she generally disliked.
Her dad had always accused her of having a chip on her shoulder. She denied it, of course, but she knew he was right. She’d decided many years ago that it was better to be alone than to give people the power to hurt her.
“I knew something was going on between you and Alice,” Lucy whispered. “She’d been seen going into your apartment.”
Hannah rolled her eyes. She bet that bit of information had spread quickly.
“Gossip. I know we’re all terrible for it. But do you know what people were saying?” Lucy asked.
“Do I want to know?”
“They were saying you made a cute couple. They were saying how good Alice is with kids and how lucky Rosie would be to have her in her life. People want you to be happy, Hannah. As difficult as that may be to believe.”
Hannah blinked. She’d assumed that any gossip about her would have been negative. She chuckled and shook her head. “Well, I messed it up, so you can report that back to everyone. Hannah Hall will be alone again.”
“What happened?” Lucy looked genuinely interested.
“I made a mistake,” Hannah confessed. “I saw a leaflet for Prince’s and assumed Alice wanted to send Rosie there.”
“Oh.” Lucy nodded. “Easy mistake to make. She didn’t correct you?”
“I didn’t give her much chance. I was typical me, jumped to conclusions, got mad, stormed out.”
“Sounds like you,” Lucy agreed.
“Hey,” Hannah argued, but it lacked bite even to her ears. She recalled the fight, and something occurred to her. “Shit. The classroom.”
“What?”
“She’d just finished breaking her back decorating the classroom. It’s going to be destroyed now.”
“I did a walk around the building a few hours ago,” Lucy said. “Three classrooms are completely gutted, the rest is smoke damage. It’s amazing that more wasn’t ruined. We’ve called in a company to clean up.”
Hannah felt angry. “She worked so hard, then nearly got herself killed. And now the classroom will be back to the shit state it was in before.”
“Then do something about it,” Lucy said.
“What? You expect me to repaint it?”
“Think bigger, Hannah. I’m trying to tell you that you are a member of this very small, very active community. I know you don’t believe me, but it’s true. Whether or not you want to be, you’re part of the family, and family pulls together in times like this.”
“You expect me to ask people to help?” Hannah stared at Lucy as if she’d suggested the most ridiculous thing in the world.
“Why not?”
“Because, as I might have mentioned, everyone hates me.”
“And I’m trying to tell you they don’t. You’re caught up in the past, Hannah. Everyone else has moved on and wonders why you hate them. Why don’t you test my theory and see if they really do hate you by trying to do something nice for Alice? What do you have to lose?”
Hannah thought about it for a moment. Maybe Lucy was right. Maybe she could encourage some people to help her out. Nearly everyone in town had attended the school or had children who had.
“Fine. I’ll try and reach out to a couple of people,” Hannah agreed. Part of her was certain that it wouldn’t work out and that she’d be shunned, but she reasoned that then she could prove to Lucy
that she was right.
Lucy pulled out her phone. “Cool, give me your number. We’re going to need to stay in touch to organise this.”
31 PULLING TOGETHER
Hannah stood by the reception desk at Chopz, feeling frazzled.
“Okay, you’re taking Rosie home to feed her and put her to bed,” she explained to Adrian, more for her benefit than his. “I’ve got that delivery coming in twenty minutes which should be all the wood that John and Tim need. The Women’s Institute ladies are bringing food for everyone, and they might work on the curtains if that delivery arrived this afternoon. I’ve got my clipboard. What else?”
Adrian sat in one of the salon chairs staring at her blankly. “I don’t know. Do I need to salute you?”
“Oh, shut up,” she told him.
A knock on the glass window got her attention, and she turned around. Mick and David waved at her and held up pots of paint. She opened the door.
“They donated? That’s amazing!”
Mick nodded. “That’s not all. They called their head office, and they want to help as well. They are sending paint and some of their employees to come and help tomorrow morning. I spoke with Lucy. She’s going to be there to let them in and show them what to do.”
“Great job,” Hannah said. “That’s a job off my list! I’m finishing up here, and then I’ll join you.”
The men said goodbye and continued their walk towards the school.
Hannah went back into the salon. “Did you hear that? I asked them to go to the hardware store on Mill Lane, and they get paint from a big supplier. I thought they might want to donate, and they did!”
“I can’t believe how many people you have convinced to donate stuff,” Adrian said. “Think you could speak to the travel agent about getting me a holiday?”
She ignored the quip. “Everyone wants to help the school. And Alice is a local hero now, so everyone wants to give back for her.”
“Isn’t she leaving hospital soon?”
“Tomorrow. Lucy has been visiting her, but I’ve been too busy. And if I take Miss Mouthy with me, then she’ll spill the beans.” Hannah gestured towards the staff room where Rosie was reading.
“You call your own daughter mouthy?” Adrian laughed.
“She can’t keep a secret,” Hannah said. She picked up her clipboard and swiped through a few pages to scrub paint from her list. “I’m planning to visit Alice at the weekend. Hopefully she’ll be okay to see me and won’t send me away.”
Hannah still hadn’t had a chance to speak with Alice since the few minutes in the hospital two days before. She didn’t know if she would be welcome. Besides, she was busy single-handedly arranging for the school to be renovated.
Hardaker had had the insurance company come in. They’d cleaned whatever could be cleaned and threw away everything that was too smoke-damaged, but the school’s insurance policy was basic to say the least.
Hannah had spoken to a couple of parents she knew reasonably well and tested the waters to see if they would be willing to donate time or money to helping with repairs. She’d been surprised by how receptive to the idea they’d been. Everyone was happy to help, even saying they would speak with friends, family, and employers to get more assistance.
Within a few hours, Hannah’s phone had exploded with offers of help, and she’d become the main organiser of the clean-up effort. Donations of money, time, expertise, and materials were coming in from all over the place.
In between client appointments, Hannah had worked with a couple of the other mums to create a battle plan. They had lists of rooms to be cleaned, furniture to be replaced, and books to be catalogued. Every time Hannah turned around, she was face to face with a new volunteer eager and smiling.
Lucy had been right. Fairlight was a family. Hannah had just shut herself off from that. She’d taken her experiences at school and used them to shape her adult life.
Once she had taken the risk and reached out to people, she was shocked that they had responded positively. It wasn’t just for the school, or for Alice. Hannah had spoken at length with people she was convinced hated her. She’d spent an hour the previous evening handing tools to Kevin, an electrician she had gone to school with. They’d chatted like old friends as he slowly repaired the Victorian fuses that had caused the fire to begin with.
People were starting to interact with Hannah more. She didn’t detect any undertone to their behaviour, just a willingness to help. At first, she had thought that people were banding together because it was for the school, but she soon realised it was more than that. She’d had countless invites to events, dinners, and drinks at the local pub.
The Fairlight family seemed to be opening their collective arms to her.
It felt good. Scary, but good.
“She’ll forgive you,” Adrian said.
“I don’t know how you can be so sure about that,” Hannah replied, not looking up from her clipboard.
“Because you’ll grovel. And you’ll explain.”
“What if that’s not enough?” Hannah asked.
The door to the salon opened. She turned around and smiled when she saw Kath from the church choir. Kath had become her second in command.
“I was telling my son, Rob, about what had happened the other night. He owns a carpentry firm up in Yorkshire. Well, he’s only gone and closed the company for the next few days, driven down here with his boys, and is going to build whatever we want! Cupboards, desks, doors… you name it!”
Hannah’s jaw dropped open. “You’re kidding.”
“Nope. I told him we’d heard from the local wood merchant and they’d give us whatever we needed. He said he’d take them up on that offer. He’s worked with primary schools in the past and has built beautiful spaces. I’m going to get my sewing group together. I thought we’d make some cushions and curtains for the youngsters’ room. Nice and bright!”
Hannah’s mind was spinning. Every time someone new showed up with some materials or expertise, the renovation plans grew a little. It was a wonderful problem to have, but the prospect of having a team of carpenters who had worked with primary schools in the past was game-changing.
Kath let out a sigh. “I’m no further with paint, though. I called up a couple of suppliers, but I couldn’t get anywhere.”
“Ah, Mick’s just told me that we have a lot of paint coming from the hardware store,” Hannah explained.
Kath’s face lit up. “That’s good news! Rob is bringing some pictures of things they’ve built before, to give us some ideas. Miss Spencer will be so surprised when she sees her new classroom!”
“She will, but remember, we need to keep it quiet,” Hannah told her. “I know how news spreads in this town!”
“Absolutely! Everyone at the hospital knows to not say a word. And Lucy will be taking her home tomorrow. Then we just need to make sure she doesn’t hear it around town for a few days.” Kath looked at her watch. “I better get down to the school. Margaret is setting up the table for the hot food, and she’s recently had laser eye surgery. She won’t tell anyone, but it went a bit wrong. Anyway, I’ll tell you all about it later.”
Kath waved goodbye to Adrian and hurried off.
Adrian gasped. “You’re inside the gossip circle!”
“I am, and if you’re not nice, I’ll tell you what they say about you,” Hannah joked.
“I’m proud of you.”
She looked at him in confusion for a few moments. “You mean the school? It’s a joint effort, I’m just getting people together, but the real wo—”
“No, not the school. I’m proud of you for being brave and talking to people and asking them for help. I know that must have been a big deal for you. But you did it. And you’ve made friends.”
She shook her head and looked away. “People are just helping out for the school. It’s nothing to do with me.”
“That’s not true, and you know it. You asked for help, and people rallied round.”
Hannah waved h
er hand to stop him from talking. She didn’t want to have a conversation that would probably lead to her crying. It had been terrifying to reach out to people, but within a short space of time she’d gone from feeling like an outsider to a central component in the weird mix that made Fairlight.
“I have to go,” she said. “You’ve got Rosie’s bag? And you know you have to make her eat vegetables. I’ve been so rushed lately that I’ve been letting that slip. She needs to grow, or she’ll be the shortest university graduate ever.”
Adrian sighed, obviously fed up with being told the same information for the sixth or even seventh time.
“I’m going, I’m going!” She grabbed her things and started to make her way towards the school and her army of volunteers.
32 HOME
“Are you looking forward to going home?” the nurse asked as she hurried around the room, opening the curtains and writing something down on a clipboard.
“I’ll miss you, but yes,” Alice admitted.
An overnight stayed had turned into two overnight stays due to the doctor not being happy with her progress. Whatever that meant. Alice was ecstatic with her progress. She was alive, which was more than she had expected after running into the smoke-filled corridor.
Alice privately admitted to herself that she felt like she had been hit by a bus, but she also knew that the only thing that would make her feel any better would be to go home. She longed for her own bed and to not be constantly interrupted by nurses doing various tasks.
Her lungs felt sore, and her entire chest felt as though it had been compressed in a tight vice, but she felt better than she had when she’d first woken up. Her recovery was going in the right direction.
“Remember, you’re signed off for a week,” the nurse told her. “Definitely no work.”
“I’ll take it easy,” Alice reassured her.
She wasn’t looking forward to a week at home. She’d never been that great at filling time. Work was her life. If she wasn’t marking schoolwork, she was prepping lesson plans. Her evenings were often filled with work, not because she enjoyed it, but because she didn’t know how else to fill them.