by K. G. Reuss
Maybe he’d been onto something.
There was really only one way to find out. I just had to take that step. I had to become what I feared—my dad.
Chapter Twenty-One
I fell asleep, my mind plagued with my father’s words, my fears, and the image of what I’d seen that day. I awoke sometime later that night to an odd sensation of being watched. And it wasn’t Shadow this time.
The full moon cut through my bedroom window, sending a sliver of pale white light to splay across my floor and casting the room in shadow. I pulled a deep breath into my lungs as the hairs on the back of my neck stood at attention.
“Breathe, Ever. Breathe,” I commanded myself softly, pulling my blankets up to my chin as I tried to get comfortable in bed. My attention snapped in the direction of a floorboard squeaking, and I swallowed hard.
“Just the house settling,” I whispered, trying to reassure myself. My hands gripped my blanket tightly as I settled back against my pillow, my body on high alert. When nothing else happened, I closed my eyes, hoping that I’d be able to sleep through this nightmare.
Creeeak!
My eyes snapped open, and I looked at my closet door. It was opening slowly, the creaking like electricity coursing through the room, the energy nearly palpable.
“Crap,” I swallowed hard, burying myself deeper into my bed. The creaking stopped when the door was completely open. I waited for whatever was within it to show itself. The room grew eerily quiet. Too quiet. Dead quiet. This silence was thick. Stagnant. Suffocating.
BANG!
Something slammed against my bedroom window, shaking the walls around it.
“Crap, crap, crap,” I hissed, my grip on the blankets tight and painful. And then the black, decayed hand appeared. Its long broken gray nails scratched across the broken pane of glass.
Wreeeeeet!
The terrible scratching sound echoed around me. I covered my ears with my hands, as my body trembled with fright.
Ever! Let me in, child. I have something that belongs to you.”
The voice cut through my body, sending a river of chills over me. The pane of glass cracked again as the fingers dug their way through. I tugged my blankets fiercely, wanting to cover my head like I’d done as a child. I wanted to hide. I wanted to escape!
“ARGH,” I screamed as I covered my head and found a body covered in bugs, rot, and blood clawing its way up beneath my blanket from the end of my bed. Its broken teeth gnashed as its jagged fingernails cut painfully into my legs. I kicked furiously. The acrid taste of rotting flesh filled my mouth as I struggled and fell out of bed, hitting the floor hard. I tried to scramble away, to run as far from there as I could, but something wrapped its cold hands around my ankles and tugged me ferociously. I reached out, screaming, clawing at anything I could to hold on, but it was useless. I was pulled under my bed into complete darkness, the only sound was my screaming and the heavy breathing from my captor.
Chapter Twenty-Two
I woke up the next morning under my bed and quickly crawled out. My body felt like I’d been beaten and left for dead. And who knew, maybe I had been. It certainly felt that way as I tried to stretch my sore muscles. I had no idea what had happened to me, but I was certainly grateful that I was still alive.
A quick shower helped to relieve some of the ache. When I saw the mark on my shoulder, I frowned. It was even redder than before, and now it had a purple tint too, like a bruise. It seemed larger, too. I hastily tried to rub the reddened skin but winced when that proved to be quite painful. Great. Something else to worry about.
Having no memory of what happened once I’d been pulled under, freaked me out. Any fear I had of turning into my dad was outweighed by the fear of existing like this.
I grabbed the flask that Dylan had given me after an evening of heavy sparring and went downstairs to my mom’s liquor cabinet. After filling it, I made sure to drink down a large portion straight from the bottle. Then I took my handful of small miracles and stuffed the flask into my bag as I sank down on the couch.
My mom was working a double, but she texted me throughout the day to check on me. By eight that night, I was so drunk that I couldn’t see straight. It seemed to work even better than the pills did. My father had given me the best gift he could—his desire to drink gallons of alcohol to escape his problems. If it kept my own demons away, then I was game. It beat his alternative—death. At least at the moment. But the night was young, and my mind wasn’t in the best place.
“Nia?” I slurred into the phone.
“Ever? What’s wrong?”
“You still going to the party tonight?” I asked, shaking my head to clear my vision. It only made it worse.
“Um, yeah. I’m leaving now. Why?”
“Come get me?” I asked.
“O-kay. I’ll be there in a few minutes.” She sounded hesitant, no doubt because the last party I went to I’d been hit by a car.
“Be fast. I hate being alone in this house. You know how crazy I am.”
Not waiting for her answer, I hung up and stumbled to my room. I pulled on a short jean skirt and tight black tank top that left way too much skin exposed. Old Ever would’ve been appalled. New Ever didn’t care.
Unable to stay inside the house any longer, I sat outside and waited for Nina to pull up. When the crunch of the gravel sounded, I climbed to my feet, ambled out to her car, and climbed into the front seat.
“Good evening,” I exclaimed drunkenly. My vision blurred and my heart fluttered madly in my chest.
“Ever, are you drunk?” Nina asked, wide-eyed.
“Abso-freaking-lutely!” I laughed, struggling with my seatbelt. “It’s so much easier like this. I can’t see any of the people or hear their voices. I know why my dad was always wasted so much now.”
“Ever, maybe you should just stay home and sleep it off—”
“No. I have to go! I have to. OK?” I stilled in my seat as I gazed at her. I couldn’t be alone. It wasn’t a good idea.
“OK,” she murmured, backing out of the driveway and heading to Jax’s house. She rambled the entire way about how she wasn’t sure what she’d tripped on that day in the cafeteria when she’d fallen, but she’d been embarrassed over it. I stared out the window and winced as we passed the cemetery. There were no shadows wandering the path this time. Something about that bothered me. I knew there were others out there besides him. I’d seen them.
And what was his deal anyway? Why did he show up sometimes but not others? Why wouldn’t he talk to me? Why was I so worried about a shadow talking to me? God, I was screwed in the head.
Once we got to the party, I made my way to the keg and continued to drink. My eyes scanned the room, seeking Jax. But he was nowhere. By midnight, I was stumbling around hugging everyone. Everyone but Dylan, who still hadn’t shown up yet.
“Ever, maybe you should slow down,” Nina frowned at me as I finished my tenth beer for the night. With bleary eyes I stared back at her, wondering when she became a hater of fun. Not that I was having fun. I was numbing the pain, silencing the voices, blinding myself so I wouldn’t have to deal with all of it. If I didn’t, I feared that I’d do something stupid. I knew I was on the verge of it. It was like knowing a word but not being able to say it. That’s what it was like with me, as I teetered on the line between sanity and insanity, with my dad telling me to just kill myself on repeat in my head. He was right. It was a means to an end.
“You’re right,” I slurred out morosely. “This beer isn’t working.” The voices were still there, just muted. With one hand I dug in my purse and pulled out the bottle of pills I’d hidden inside. I fumbled with the lid for a moment before I was able to get it off. With a shake, I poured two small pills into my hand and tossed them back, using my eleventh beer to wash them down.
“Ever, come on,” Nina pleaded, her blue eyes big as she stared at me. “Stop, OK? Do you want me to call your mom? She can help you-,”
“My mom?” I scoffed, ste
adying myself on the wall. “She already thinks I’ve slipped off the deep end. She’ll have me committed before sunrise.” I let my bleary eyes wander over to where Dylan was standing with a beer in his hand. He was finally here. His handsome face looked amused as Jax and his group of friends laughed. He said he wanted me still. He said he’d always be there when I was ready. Well, I was ready for something else to distract me.
Casey stood beside him. She kept touching him lightly on the arm or chest. I narrowed my eyes and pushed my drink into Nina’s hand. I was doing this. Alcohol was my liquid courage.
“Ever, what are you doing?” Nina reached out for me, the worry evident in her voice.
I pulled away and didn’t answer her as I made my way over to Dylan. I wasn’t even sure what I was doing. There was this wild idea in my head that I had to do something drastic to make the pain and confusion disappear. Dylan seemed like the best place to start. If I wasn’t with him, then everything that had happened to me had been in vain.
“Dylan,” I called his name out softly, and his eyes snapped to me, his arm dropping away from Casey’s waist.
“Hey, Ever,” he replied, a careful, curious smile on his face. His eyes raked over my body quickly, lingering in some places before finding my eyes and locking on them. I swallowed hard as Casey glared at me. Dylan’s friends went quiet as they watched. Blame it on the alcohol or my sudden craziness, but I had to have him back. I wanted to be normal again.
With a step forward, I rested my hand on his chest, pushing Casey out of the way. He stared down at me for a moment with a look of confusion on his face, before I went up on my tiptoes and pressed my mouth to his. He seemed stunned by my move, and I heard Casey sputter out a protest, but it was short-lived as his hands landed on the small of my back, tugging me to him. His tongue swept my mouth quickly.
When we broke apart, Dylan’s friends stared at us, stunned. Casey’s face was livid, her hands clenching and unclenching into fists as she stared daggers at me.
“Want to leave?” Dylan asked softly, glancing from Casey to me.
“Yeah,” I nodded breathlessly, letting him steer me away.
“Ever,” Nina shouted after me as she tried to break through the crowd of partygoers. “Ever! Wait!”
I didn’t bother to stop. I’d give Dylan whatever he wanted if it made me feel normal again.
Chapter Twenty-Three
I was wasted. I let Dylan take me out to his car, him pushing me along quickly as I stumbled around trying to maintain my balance. Clumsily, I climbed in, and he shut the door. Nina and Jax approached. Jax looked apprehensive with his hands stuffed in his pockets. Nina pointed her finger at Dylan as her pretty face twisted into a scowl. I couldn’t make out what she was saying, but she was definitely angry as her mouth moved quickly and her eyes flashed. She rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest, seemingly tired of their conversation.
After another moment of arguing, she pushed him out of the way and opened my door.
“Ever, get out of the car. Now,” she demanded, her voice hard.
“Nina, leave her alone,” Dylan snapped from behind her as he tried to move her aside.
“I’m not getting out,” I slurred, my head spinning. “I’m going with Dylan.”
“See? She wants to go, Nina, so why don’t you go back to the party and drink a little and loosen up. God knows you could use it.” Dylan managed to wedge himself between me and Nina effectively blocking me from her view.
“Ever, you’re drunk. Just get out and come with me. I won’t tell your mom. We can go back to my place, and you can sleep it off,” she reasoned breathlessly, pushing him so I could see her.
“No,” I shook my head, staring straight ahead.
“Jax, take Nina back to the party, would you?” Dylan cut in, sighing in exasperation.
“Don’t you hurt her, Dylan,” Nina breathed out shakily, her voice dangerous. “You nearly killed her last time.”
“Piss off, Nina,” Dylan growled, moving to shove her. Jax jumped between them and put his hand on Dylan’s chest to stop him from getting too close to her.
“Dylan, chill, man. Ever’s really messed up right now. Maybe it’s best if she does go home with Nina,” Jax said diplomatically. Nina’s soft sniffles fell on my ears making my heart clench. I knew she was upset about the situation. I just had to do this.
“She’s sick, Dylan,” Nina shouted, pointing accusingly at him, her voice trembling. “She needs to be home, not getting you off in the backseat of your car.”
“Get her out of my face, Jax,” Dylan spat, backing away from Nina. Jax pulled Nina away, her face falling. He said something to her and she shook her head, looking over her shoulder at me. I drew in a deep breath, my mind made up. I was going with Dylan.
He climbed into the car and started it. His hand moved over the console to rest on my bare thigh briefly. His eyes were hungry. Giving my leg a slight squeeze, he let go, put the car in gear, and we sped off down the street. We didn’t talk until he pulled into his driveway.
“My parents are away for the weekend,” he murmured, his dark eyes shining as he gazed at me. “No one will bother us.” Without waiting for me to answer, he got out of the car and came around to my side to help me out. I stumbled into him as my head spun. Leaning down, he pressed his warm mouth to mine. His hands roved over my back.
“I’ve missed you, Ever,” he said, peppering my face with kisses. “Come on.” He pulled away and helped me into his house and up the stairs to his bedroom. He didn’t waste any time getting his hands on me again as we fell onto his bed.
“I’m so sorry about us. About what happened to you that night,” he breathed out between kisses. “I’ve been so worried about you, baby. I’m glad you decided to end this nonsense and be with me again.”
I kissed him back, ignoring the war my heart and mind waged within me—the alcohol and pills fought a war I wasn’t sure either would win.
“I-I shouldn’t be doing this,” I managed to gasp as he pulled me closer, the old Ever trying to claw her way out.
“Shh, baby,” he kissed me deeply. “Stop overthinking it. I’ll make you feel so good.”
I lay back on the bed, my body numb, as Dylan gazed down at me fondly. He leveled his body over mine, his mouth finding mine again. His hands moved to touch every bit of my warm skin.
“He’s going to find out,” a voice whispered frantically through the haze. I raked my fingers through Dylan’s hair, desperate to distract myself from whatever the voice was talking about.
“He’s going to be so mad,” another shaky voice whispered.
“We should go. Who knows what he’ll do when he finds out.”
“I’m not leaving. She brought this on herself. What’s he going to do to us? We’re already dead.”
“You know damn well what he’ll do if he gets his hands on us. We’ll be forced into a box and used—sucked dry.”
I pushed Dylan off me, panting, and dropped my head into my hands.
“Ever?” Dylan asked, confusion making his voice thick. “You OK?”
“No,” I shook my head, trying to breathe evenly. I looked at Dylan, his hair messy, his handsome face concerned. He never looked concerned about anything. Maybe I really was a freak if even he looked at me odd.
I didn’t want to be a freak. I didn’t want pity. I wanted to be Ever again, not the crazy girl who heard voices and saw strange things lurking around.
I leaned in and kissed him again. He didn’t resist, his mouth opening easily so he could run his tongue along mine. I let him lay me back down as his hands went back to holding me. The air shifted around us. It grew heavy and thick with foreboding. I squeezed my eyes closed, ignoring it as I continued to kiss Dylan.
“He’s coming,” the first voice squealed with fright.
“Hide! Hide so he won’t find us,” another voice called out frantically.
“She’s in so much trouble, He won’t be happy,” a third voice shouted.
/> “He might remedy the problem for us, though,” another sneering voice hissed.
“Stop,” I screamed out, the noise too much. “Stop, please,” I whimpered as my hands covered my ears. Dylan stopped kissing me, and stared down at me with a frazzled look on his face.
“Ever, baby, come on. Relax,” he murmured as he raked his fingers through my hair. His lips found mine again, only I didn’t kiss him back this time. Frustrated, his mouth moved down to my neck. His hips dug into mine.
“Dylan, stop. Please,” I whispered, suddenly needing to get out of there.
The air was difficult to breathe. Something terrifying was coming. Something I’d already faced only yesterday in my bedroom. Shadow appeared at the foot of the bed. His eyes glowed red and fiery. Anger resonated from every bit of blackness that blanketed him.
Dylan was lifted off me. His face twisted in terror and shock, as he was tossed easily across the room. He landed with a thud against the wall before sliding down it. Shadow stalked purposefully toward him. Dylan clearly couldn’t see it, but fear was written on his face. His wild eyes darted about frantically, as he tried to process what just happened.
“No,” I screamed, trying to scramble out of the bed. My feet tangled in the bedsheets from Dylan’s unmade bed. “No. Don’t hurt him.”
Shadow ignored me and leaned down. He wrapped his fingers around Dylan’s neck causing Dylan to choke and sputter in protest. His beautiful eyes bulged as he scrambled to claw at Shadow’s invisible hand around his neck.
“Stop,” I shouted, tears pouring down my cheeks. My chest ached with fear. “Please, stop!” Finally able to cross the room, I reached out, not knowing what else to do, and touched Shadow’s arm. He turned his head to me, his grip on Dylan’s neck loosening.
He seemed to be contemplating something. His gleaming red eyes gazing deeply into my own as he cocked his head. Appearing to have come to a decision, he turned back to Dylan and tightened his grip again. Effortlessly, he lifted Dylan to his feet and then just a little higher so he was pinned to the wall with his feet dangling inches from the floor.