by K. G. Reuss
With a whimper, I slumped forward. A blurry dark figure, dressed in black, appeared in front of me. He came forward quickly, and I was released. I fell forward as the orderlies were tossed roughly aside by the figure moving swiftly between them.
“Help,” I choked out, my vision darkening as the figure swept forward and scooped me off the floor. I couldn’t make out who or what he was because of a dark hood pulled over his head. “Please. Let me die.”
“Where’s the fun in that?” he murmured, his voice distorted as my world spun and darkness descended on me.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
I woke up bleary-eyed in that same ugly, mint-colored room sometime before the sun broke out over the horizon. I knew someone had entered the room I was in with Dr. Brighton last night and helped me. But who? And how?
He seemed to poof in out of nowhere. My brain throbbed. I was sick of trying to figure everything out. Staggering to my feet, I tore the sheets off my bed. As I knotted them together, I looked around for a suitable place to die from.
I was being reckless. I knew it. But I wanted out. Just like my dad said I would. That disembodied voice that told me this it was all a dream, and I was still in a coma, whispered in my mind.
Only one way to find out.
With a boost, I scrambled onto the dresser. I reached up and tapped the ceiling tiles. They were the loose kind. Perfect. Pushing a few aside, I looked up at the steel rafters. In one toss, I’d slung my roped sheets over the rafters and knotted them quickly.
I stared at the makeshift noose I’d made and licked my lips. My heart hammered wildly in my chest. Third time’s a charm. I stuck my head through the noose and closed my eyes With a deep exhale, I poised myself to jump. My knees bent. My mind racing. An eerie calm settled over me. The voices whispered from the depths of wherever they existed.
“Do it quick. Don’t hesitate,” one encouraged.
“I remember when I killed myself. It was glorious.”
“You won’t die,” one taunted.
“Jump, Ever. He’s coming for you. Then you won’t be able to come see the truth. Quick, JUMP.”
“JUMP! JUMP! JUMP,” a chorus of voices picked up the chant.
The voices became excited. It was contagious. The truth? I wanted that.
“If you’re listening, tell me what you’re talking about. What truth is out there?”
“We’re listening. Always listening,” the voice encouraging me to jump answered.
“The truth about you. What you are. We can help. You just have to come here.”
“He stopped you last time. Be quick about it, girl. Come see the truth,” a voice begged.
“Become what you fear.”
“It’ll change everything, Ever. Are you prepared for it?”
“Yes,” I whispered, closing my eyes in resignation. I made the jump with tears streaming down my face.
It didn’t even matter to me if the voices were right or not. Real or not. They could be, or they could just be a manifestation of my brain injury. I didn’t care. I wanted the truth, whatever deep, dark, final truth that was.
I’d die for it.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
The sheets caught, pulling me roughly to a stop before I hit the floor. I dangled above it, not struggling as my vision began to pop, dotted with sparkles. My body begged for its next breath, but my soul demanded to be set free.
Through my sparkly vison, I saw a face peering in through the window on my door.
“Ever! Everly,” Dr. Brighton shouted through the locked door, his face stricken with panic. “Open the damn door!”
“I-I can’t,” someone shouted. “It won’t open.”
Dr. Brighton shouted frantically, hammering his fists on the heavy, metal door.
“Where the hell is he,” Dr. Brighton hollered. “This can’t be happening.”
I watched as beings slithered from beneath my bed and barred the door by pressing their ghostly forms against it. One turned and looked at me. A man whose face was covered in blood and twisted in pain.
“Go, Ever! Let go,” he urged.
The last breath in my lungs was finally extinguished like a flame, and I let go.
Death wasn’t what I expected. The last time I’d almost died, I hadn’t seen anything. At least nothing I remembered. I was disappointed to see that there wasn’t a brilliant white light at the end of a tunnel. No family members greeted me. Instead, it was just me standing in a dull, gray, foggy world still wearing my ugly hospital gown.
Frantically, I looked around. Hissing and scurrying sounds travelled through the dense fog. I yelped as something skittered past and grabbed at my leg. With a kick, I sent it away. Stumbling, I rushed blindly through the fog.
“Where are you going?” a male voice called out. He didn’t sound menacing. I halted and looked around trying to find the source of the voice. A moment later, a young man wearing jeans and a blue t-shirt came into view. His russet-colored hair was windswept, and his green eyes were bright, alive.
“W-who are you?” I asked, my voice trembling as I looked around uncertainly.
“A messenger,” he answered, stopping in front of me, keeping his hands in his pockets.
“Did I succeed? Am I dead?”
“Yes… And no.” He shrugged and gave me a small smile. “It’s complicated.”
“Either I’m dead or I’m not. It’s not all that complicated,” I snapped at him. Seemed death hadn’t made me any less irritable. “Where am I?”
“Fine. You’re dead enough to be here—the Veil—and alive enough to continue to exist. Your body is hurt, but it lives. For how long? I don’t know. It depends, but I daresay it won’t matter if he gets here in time. And the Veil, the place between life and death—you’re the only one of your kind able to walk here. That makes you very special, Ever. Your body is still alive, your soul is just on hiatus until he gets to you.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I demanded, wondering where were all the answers I was promised.
“It means, that he hasn’t come for you yet. But, I don’t doubt he will. We’re holding him off as best we can. If we can hold him off long enough, maybe he won’t be able to get you back. We’ve never done it before, so we don’t know,” he shrugged again. “It’s a bit of a new adventure for all of us.”
“Who is he? And who is us?”
“You know who he is,” he scoffed.
My mind raced. The light bulb finally came on. “Shadow? You mean Shadow when you’re talking about him?”
He nodded and continued, “He is a powerful being. More powerful than you can imagine. He has several roles. Primarily, he deals in redemption and punishment.”
“Like a judge?”
“You could say that, but on a supernatural level. But the biggest thing you need to know is that he has the power to take your death from you. Only yours.”
“Why would he do that? Not that I even understand what THAT is.” Frustration was rising rapidly. I was supposed to get answers, not more questions.
“It may not seem like it, but it’s a huge honor. He chose you. He cares about you. He has spent his entire life watching over you, trying to keep you safe. And he would stop at nothing to do that, even Marking you. Even taking your death to experience as his own so that you can live.”
So many questions rolled in my mind, each fighting for supremacy. Who is this guy talking to me? What am I? What did he mean by Marking me? Is that what that bruise is?
Finally, a question won in my mind. “Why are all the voices so concerned about me living or dying?”
“Because. You’re meant to tip the tide of war, Ever. The war within the Special world. And unfortunately, the poor fool protecting you has been given misinformation. That’s the problem with taking orders and being blinded though, isn’t it? Once the Order realized what he might be many years ago, he was taken under their wing and honed to be what he’s become—dangerous.”
“I don’t understand. Who’s the
Order?” I shook my head at him frowning. None of what was happening made a lick of sense to me.
“There are so many things I need to explain to you. But I would need hours to make you understand. And we don’t have hours. When he reaches you, he’ll lift the Veil and pull you back. So, this is what matters. You’re a special girl, Ever.” He smiled easily at me. “Unfortunately, you’re dangerous because of it.”
Confusion crossed my face. I was dangerous? I only ever hurt myself or defended myself. Never anyone else for no reason.
He rushed to explain, “You see, the world you live in isn’t only what you think it is. There are others like you with gifts. There’s a special place for them. A place to get away. They go there to harness their abilities so that they can function in the “real world” should they choose to. If they decide to stay in Xanan or any of their home realms, they may—”
“This isn’t making any sense—”
“Just listen. We’re running out of time,” the man said, his voice becoming urgent. Apprehension marred his features as a loud crash sounded from somewhere behind us. “He’s strong.”
I looked through the fog to where the crash came from.
“Ever, listen,” the man said quickly, “he doesn’t know that what he’s doing is wrong. There’s a bigger picture here that he doesn’t see or doesn’t know about. He thinks he’s helping, but he isn’t. If you go back, it’s your job to save us.”
“What?”
“The dead, the Specials, the Naturals, even him—we’re all in danger. Something is happening to us—the dead, and even to the Specials. There’s a man, a Special, who wants power, Ever. He gets it from us. He’s taking us and turning us into something twisted and vile. You have to fight him.”
“I don’t know if you’ve been paying attention, but I’m barely functioning. I can’t fight anything, not even myself. I can’t help you. I can’t even help myself.”
“You have to. Innocents are being harmed. Life is being taken. He doesn’t want you to live if you don’t join his insane crusade to take over. You’re a threat to him. You’re a threat to all of us.”
“How am I a threat? I am locked up in a padded room, where I keep trying to figure out a way to leave this world.
“You make Shadow stronger, Ever. And he follows orders blindly because he’s been tricked into thinking he’s saving you. He doesn’t know the one giving the orders is also the one sending the dead after you. Don’t join him. Play the game as long as you have to. When you get a chance to break free, do it. The fate of all of us, falls on you. We fear what the two of you together are capable of. Everyone’s in jeopardy. I’d keep you safe and dead here if I could.”
“This isn’t making any sense,” I shouted for what felt like the hundredth time as the wails of pain echoed around us.
“He’s here,” the man murmured. “He’s going to take you.”
“Who’s here? What’s your name?” I asked frantically, the shouts grew louder.
“My name is Marek. Ever, listen. Everything you see and hear is real. You aren’t crazy. You’re a Special. Your ability is veil walking and ghost whispering. So far. More will manifest.”
I opened my mouth to ask more questions about these abilities and what other freakish things might develop, but a swift headshake from him stopped me.
“They’ll be taking you to Dementon, something we expected when you came here. You’ll hone your skills and abilities there like the others. Like you would if you could go to Xanan. But you’re not like them. You’re so much more. Shadow will show you, but be careful. He knows not what he does. He’s more lost than the souls he’s taking. But he’ll keep you safe from those who wish to harm you. I have faith that you will not join his quest, and you’ll realize what you need to do in order to save all those involved. But beware, if you are not with him, you are apart from him.…And that makes you an enemy to the crusade they’re on. We can’t change what you’re meant to be.”
“And what is that?” I asked, trying to absorb everything he was saying to me.
“We don’t know. That’s why we’re so afraid,” Marek whispered, swallowing hard. “Just stay who you are. Trust your heart. Your gut. I believe you’ll make the right choices. You have enemies all over. The dead. The living. Specials. The creatures from the void. We’re all separated by fear.”
There was a tremendous tugging inside of me, and I fell to my knees before him.
“W-what’s happening?” I asked, staring fearfully at my hands as they began to flicker, becoming transparent.
“He broke through. He’s bringing you back before your heart completely stops. He’ll take your injuries as his own, again, and regenerate. He gives you his strength. It’s part of who—and what—he is. Please, Ever, try to remember what I’ve told you. I don’t know that you’ll retain this information. I pray that you do.”
“Marek!” I screamed, as pain seared my body. Tiny flickers of blue electricity crackled through my transparent skin.
“Be brave,” Marek shouted desperately.
Another tug. I clawed uselessly at the air around me as some invisible force started pulling me back in the direction I’d come from. My body felt heavy.
“Ever! Come on! Don’t leave me,” pleaded a ragged, desperate, distorted voice in the distance.
The veil closed, and I slammed back in place. The experience was jarring. Something was wrapped around me. Holding me. It was nice. I had the feeling of being lifted, then laid flat. I opened my eyes. Filling my field of vision was darkness. After a few blinks, the darkness began to resolve and shift. My eyes focused on mesmerizing red orbs floating a few inches from my face. It was him. He came.
“Why?” he cried in an anguished voice. A shock of white flashed through his body. I could almost make out features. But the flash was so quick, I might have imagined it.
I opened my mouth to speak. I needed to answer him. He deserved an answer. But I was afraid he’d be disappointed in me.
His hold on me was loosening. Before he let go of me, he leaned down and pressed a kiss to my lips. It was warmer than I expected. I reached a hand up to cradle his cheek. He sighed against my mouth and whispered, “Everly,” then he faded away. My hand clutched at the empty air. The loss of him was crushing. I closed my eyes and surrendered to the darkness as a tear leaked out.
Chapter Thirty
“How are you feeling?” Dr. Brighton’s voice broke through the haze as I blinked my eyes rapidly.
“Like a failure,” I rasped out, my throat ridiculously sore. “And like I’m sick of waking up like this.” I gingerly reached up and touched my neck. “Ugh. Why does this hurt so much?”
“Well,” Dr. Brighton answered curtly, “you hung yourself. You decided to kill yourself in your bedroom yesterday before morning meds were passed out. Congratulations. You almost succeeded there for a minute.”
“Where’s my gold star?” I muttered, adjusting myself to sit up. I winced at how sore my body was. “Or my participation trophy.”
“Everly, this isn’t a joke,” Dr. Brighton reprimanded sternly, his gray eyes narrowed at me and his lip curled.
“Whatever. Did you tell my mom?” He didn’t need to say anything for me to know the answer. “Really? You have me in this facility, I nearly kill myself, and you don’t tell my mom?”
“Your mother has been through enough, wouldn’t you agree?” Dr. Brighton replied icily. “Do you really want me to add to it?”
“No,” I muttered, rubbing my eyes.
“So,” Dr. Brighton said after a moment of silence, “did you find the answers you were looking for?”
“Like that I should use a rope instead of a bed sheet next time?”
“You know what I mean, Ever,” he said sternly. “You may have had this strange urge to end it all, but you were also looking for confirmation. Did you find it?”
I bit my lip and looked at him, flashes of my conversation with the man surfaced. I couldn’t recall it all. I frowned as I
dug deeper into my mind. But nothing significant came back to me, with the exception of him telling me I was going to a place called Dementon. And him assuring me that everything I was experiencing was real. Oh, and Shadow could pretty much take my pain away and die for me should my heart stop so that I wouldn’t die. Figured. I couldn’t escape if I wanted to.
A niggling of fear and doubt crept in at my hazy memory of Shadow bringing me back from wherever I was. My heart ached at the despair that was so visible on a featureless being. I knew that I had somehow let him down. What if he never came back? What if there was a limit to how many times he could save me from myself? Or worse, what if he was fed up with me? What if he no longer wanted to be my get out of death free card?
Yes, I’d gotten answers and thousands more questions.
“I guess,” I mumbled.
“Are you done being reckless?” Dr. Brighton demanded.
“Probably not,” I said with a shrug. “But as far as trying to kill myself, it doesn’t make much sense to keep doing something that I can’t succeed at. Isn’t that what insanity is? Doing the same thing over and over yet expecting different results?”
“According to some,” he answered, his lip still curled with disdain.
“When am I leaving?”
“And where do you think you’ll be going?” Dr. Brighton leveled his steely gaze on me.
“Dementon.” I stated matter-of-factly. “I know that’s where I’m supposed to go. I don’t get a choice in it, do I?”
“It may seem harsh that you don’t get to choose where you go,” he replied, not bothering to play dumb with me. “But to be fair, Dementon is the top facility in our country for Specials. We accept many into the program. So, yes, you’ll be going there. I expect your mother wants you to have a top-notch education, and Dementon will afford you that in addition to being a place where you can learn about yourself and how to hone and control your abilities.”