He held the bag up to her, and she wrinkled her nose.
“I swear, something about doughnut grease works wonders.” He gave her that smile, the one that tripped up her heart and made her suck in her breath. “Trust me.”
She reached into the bag. “Uh … about last night …” Her face heated and she ducked her head, nibbling on the pastry.
“Do you remember my apology?” he asked, suddenly serious.
She remembered. She also remembered whining about her parents and acting like an idiot with a lemon on her head. But the apology, Dax needing her to believe he was sorry, that was a happy memory.
She nodded.
“That’s all that matters about last night,” he said. “The rest of it we don’t need to talk about. Not unless you want to.”
Which she didn’t. The doughnut was starting to taste good, so she took a larger bite, and her stomach didn’t rebel. She gulped down more coffee and eyed him over the rim of the cup. “Doughnuts and coffee, huh?”
“The only thing I learned in college.” Dax wiped his hands on his pants and rolled to his feet. “You’re welcome to hang out here today, but I have to get ready. I’m thinking about starting a new tour and I need to investigate the area. I told Jesse I’d do it today.”
“What’s the tour going to be?” Lissa popped the rest of the doughnut in her mouth and clambered to her feet.
Dax stuck a hand under her elbow, steadying her. “The Hidden Waterfalls of Michigan. There’s one about sixty miles from here.”
“Sounds beautiful. Can I go with you?”
Dax drew his eyebrows together. “You want to? I thought you’d want to relax today. Recover from last night.”
“The coffee and doughnut helped. But I think getting out in the fresh air would be even better.” Lissa stretched and felt the hem of her tank top rise. She looked down at her wrinkled clothes from the night before. “A shower would make me feel close to human again. If you don’t mind stopping by my motel so I can take a quick one and get a change of clothes?”
“Sure.”
William jumped to his feet and shook, his collar jangling.
Dax sighed. “I’ll take you along, too.” He shared a look with her. “Why do I feel like this dog singled me out as the biggest sucker at Forever Friends? He gets more walks than all the other dogs put together, home cooking, and even kicked me out of my own bed.” He bent down and went eye to eye with the Bluetick. “You need to find your forever home, pronto.”
Lissa grinned. Dax was an incredible person, but he sure was blind to what was in front of his very own face. “Maybe he just knows a good thing when he sees one.” She ruffled the dog’s ears and darted a glance at Dax’s face.
And maybe Lissa did, too.
* * * *
Lissa breathed deeply, smelling nothing but pine and earth and fresh air. She, Dax, and William hiked past a low shrub with small white flowers, and the delicate floral scent joined in the amazing bouquet of aromas of the outdoors.
Bending over, she picked one of the blooms and held it to her nose as she gazed over the rolling meadow to her right. The trail they were on bordered a forest, dipping in and out of the trees, but always coming back to the meadow.
Absolutely beautiful.
William trotted back and nudged her thigh with his nose.
“I’m coming.” She ruffled his fur. “Just stopping to appreciate the scenery.”
Dax strolled back to them and pulled a water bottle from his pack. He handed it to Lissa before pulling out his own. “You think this is nice, just wait. In about half a mile, your mind will be blown.” He reached out his hand, palm up, and Lissa slipped hers inside.
He took the flower from her other hand and tucked it behind her ear. “New Jersey tea.”
“What?”
He nodded at the flower. “It’s called New Jersey tea. During the Revolutionary War, when tea imports were restricted, Americans made tea boiling its leaves.”
“Huh.” She cocked her head. “I didn’t peg you for a botanist.”
He lifted one shoulder. “I’m not really. But when I’m leading people through the countryside, they want to know about the animals and plants they’re looking at. I’ve learned a little.”
Lissa bet it was more than a little. “The scent is lovely. I wish I could bottle it.”
He shrugged again. “I prefer honeysuckle,” he said before flushing and looking down the trail.
Lissa’s belly fluttered. That was her favorite flower, too. She always tried to find shampoos and lotions scented with it. Was it a coincidence, or did Dax like honeysuckle because of her? She wanted to believe it was because of her.
She looked down at their joined hands, her skin tingling where they touched. They were both sweaty, and her bare legs were covered in a fine layer of dirt. Nothing about this should have been sexy. But when Dax gave her that lopsided smile and tugged her hand, she felt that tug deep in her belly.
She fell into step beside him. William raced ahead, forging their path when the trail petered off into nothingness. A woodpecker rapped on a tree nearby, but aside from that and William’s occasional barks, it was silent.
Dax spoke tentatively into that silence. “Last night, you mentioned your parents.”
All her lovely tingles disappeared. She pulled her hand free. “I don’t want to talk about that.” About them. She’d been silly last night. There was nothing wrong with her mom and dad’s parenting style. They were just different. They hadn’t been boring like 90 percent of everyone else’s parents. They’d taught her to be wild and free, and she would always be grateful.
Dax took her hand again, held it tight. “Look, I don’t know your parents or much about your childhood—”
“No, you don’t.”
“But,” he continued, undeterred, “I do know you. And you’re a kind, talented, beautiful woman. You need to know that.”
Her cheeks warmed, and she knocked her elbow into his arm. “Okay. Sure.”
He stopped and turned to face her. “Not, ‘okay, sure.’” Running his hands up her arms, he gripped her shoulders. “You shouldn’t have one ounce of uncertainty about any of that. And if I have to remind you of it every five minutes, I will. Got it?”
Her cheeks went from warm to burning hot. She hoped her skin was dark enough to hide her embarrassment, but she suspected not. Especially not when he cupped her cheek and could feel the heat for himself.
To have someone so unabashedly sing her praises was awkward and strange and … lovely. Just knowing one person believed in her, truly thought she had talent, was like having a steady hand on her back. Urging her forward when she didn’t believe in herself and ready to catch her if she stumbled.
But it was still weird, and she was unsure how to respond. So she elbowed him in the gut and marched onward, flipping her hair over her shoulder. “I got it. Now the rest break’s over, you big wuss. Let’s get moving.”
In two long strides, he caught up with her and they walked side by side. Dax whistled, and William came trotting back.
“I think William’s starting to settle.” Her shoulders rounded. It was a little depressing seeing a free spirit be tamed. “He doesn’t seem to want to get too far away from us.”
“Getting settled isn’t a bad thing,” Dax said. “Not if you’re settling in the right place.”
Or with the right person? That thought went unsaid. She gave Dax a glance out of the corner of her eye. He would be the right person. For another woman. It wouldn’t be her. Her feet would get restless after a couple of months. The urge to explore a new place would take her over.
A small hole opened in her heart. No, she wasn’t the right woman for Dax for the long term, but that didn’t mean they couldn’t enjoy their time together.
Should she come back and visit Dax after school started? It probably would
n’t be fair to him. Might give him expectations she could be the settling type, too. But it didn’t feel like this relationship, whatever it might be, had run its course yet.
Uncertainty gnawed at her.
“Though I guess there’s something to be said for being flexible enough to move on when the time is right.” The muscles of his arm tightened. “I might have to be looking for something new, too, if my coworker ends up buying Off-Road. I don’t think he’d keep me on, and I definitely wouldn’t want to work under him. I might be looking for a fresh start.”
“You don’t sound happy about it.”
He stared into the distance, his eyes vacant. “No. I feel like I’ve found my place. After I dropped out of college, I traveled around the country taking odd jobs and just exploring.” He blinked and refocused on his surroundings. He looked down at her, giving her a half smile. “When I landed here, it felt like home.”
Lissa swallowed. Home. She didn’t think she’d ever known what that felt like. But the way Dax said the word, it sounded like something precious.
She pulled her shoulders back. And if it was something Dax prized, he damn well shouldn’t lose it. “You’re not giving up on your dreams yet. Even if you don’t get that loan, start your own company from scratch. Start fund-raising online. If this is what you want, then go for it. You deserve it.”
His lips tipped up. “Were you a cheerleader in high school?”
“Homeschooled,” she reminded him. “And don’t change the subject. Tell me you’ll go for it, no matter what the bank decides.”
He pursed his lips and nodded. “You’re right. I was giving up too easily. I need someone like you by my side, kicking my butt every once in a while.”
“I can do that.” For the next couple of weeks or so. They started walking again. His arm brushed against hers, and she leaned into him. Just for a second, she thought about what type of woman she’d need to be to get to walk by Dax’s side throughout the rest of his life. Absently, she rubbed her breastbone. A person didn’t get to have everything. She’d chosen her path long ago.
A low rushing sound reached her ears. She looked up, but the boughs of the trees above weren’t moving with any wind. She drew her eyebrows together.
Dax pushed aside a low-hanging branch and held it back as she walked past. He nodded his head toward a rocky circle of earth twenty feet in front of them. “Look.”
Rocking up onto her toes, Lissa chewed on the inside of her cheek. It was a very pretty part of the woods, but nothing spectacular. And was that small trickle of water disappearing between the rocks the waterfall Dax was talking about?
Dax trotted closer, looking as excited as William had when he’d stolen Dax’s sandwich from their packed lunch.
“It’s very pretty.” Lissa tried to inject enthusiasm into her voice. She hoped the rest of his adventure tours weren’t as anticlimactic. She trailed after him. “And maybe with more rain …” The low rushing sound turned into a muted roar. Lissa took one more step and stopped dead, her mouth hanging open. “How …?”
What she’d assumed was a pile of stone was actually the horseshoe-shaped rim of a canyon. The center dropped twenty feet into an inviting-looking pool of pigeon-blue water below. Stepping to the edge, she peered down. Cool air rolled up from the hollow to kiss her heated skin. An underground stream shot out of an opening in the rock to her right and plunged to the pool below. The basin was about fifteen feet in diameter, the tail end tapering off into a lazy stream that curled around a bend in the small canyon and drifted out of sight.
“Wow.”
Dax grinned. “Right? I only found out about this from a couple of local kids who say they like to jump into the pool. But I’m torn. It would make a great tour, but part of its appeal is that it’s unknown. If I start bringing tourists here, even small groups, that would change.”
Lissa toed off her tennis shoes while he spoke. Her socks quickly followed. She looked down at her shorts and tee. Sweaty and dirty, like her. Everything could use a bath. Grinning, she stretched her arms to the sky. This was familiar. Comfortable. Doing something rash and crazy. The rush of adrenaline pushed out any thoughts of a future without Dax, of her problems with Morris and her parents.
“People should be able to see this,” she told Dax. It wasn’t a particularly high waterfall, nor very powerful. But the unexpectedness of it, combined with the beauty of the woods they’d first ridden through on an ATV and then hiked, wove together to make this spot magical. “It shouldn’t be reserved for only a privileged few to enjoy.”
“Maybe.” He bent and swiped a short stick from the ground and chucked it away from the canyon for William to chase. “But … what are you doing?” He jerked up straight and took a step toward her. His eyebrows snapped together. “Lissa, I don’t—”
Stepping to the edge, she waggled her fingers. “See you at the bottom.” And without a moment’s hesitation, she leaped from the cliff.
Chapter 14
The blond tips of Lissa’s curls disappeared from view, and everything inside Dax froze. His next words, his heart, his thoughts. Even the water gushing in the falls seemed to hold its breath.
He blinked, and the world jumpstarted back into motion.
“Lissa!” He hopped to the edge of the falls, tugging off first one boot, then the other. He scanned the water, still rippling from her impact, but didn’t see her. “Shit!” Not seeing any obvious boulders beneath him, Dax jumped into the void, windmilling his arms as he plummeted to the water below.
He sliced into the water feet first, the cold sucking him downward, spinning him with the current from the falls. Scissoring his legs, Dax kicked to the surface and swung his wet hair out of his eyes. “Lissa!”
“Back here,” she called, her voice faint behind the chatter of falling water.
Every muscle in Dax went lax, and he sank below the surface. Spitting out water, he swam around to the back of the falls.
Lissa was perched on a half-submerged rock, trailing her fingers back and forth in the frothy water. Behind her was a semicircle of crushed pebbles, stretching within about a five-foot radius. Her hair was slicked back and her shorts and T-shirt clung to every curve.
Looking up at him, she grinned. “Isn’t this amazing?” She swept her hand around the small grotto behind the falls. “It’s almost like a small beach hidden back here. This waterfall must have existed for a long time to pound the rocks into these tiny pebbles.”
Dax didn’t give a crap about geology right now. “Are you crazy? You don’t just jump into an unknown body of water. You could have hit a rock, broken your damn neck!”
She had the ever-loving gall to roll her eyes. “Relax. I could see there was nothing in the water below me. And I jumped feet first. At worst, I would have broken a foot.”
His shoulders inched toward his ears as his chest squeezed. She was going to give him a heart attack. That was the way he was going to go. “That’s most definitely not the worst that could have happened. I’ve seen plenty of idiots almost kill themselves because they didn’t respect nature enough. I just didn’t think you’d be one of them.” He found footing on a shelf of slick granite and stood, towering over her. “Have you any survival instincts at all? Climbing in the back of a stranger’s van? Jumping off cliffs? You may revel in being a free-spirited hippie, but that doesn’t give you license to act so recklessly. You scared the shit out of me.”
Chest heaving, Dax glared down at her. His hands trembled and he clenched his hips to hide it. Harebrained, foolhardy woman.
She wrapped her arms around her knees and stared at him. Her blue-gray eyes glowed in the fractured sunlight coming through the falls. “I didn’t mean to scare you, Dax. I never want to hurt you.”
“Then use your head!”
Resting her cheek on her knee, she released a shuddering breath.
Acid roiled in his gut. Christ, sh
e’d taken ten years off his life, acting like her safety didn’t matter. And because he’d been afraid for her, he was lashing out and hurting her. Not a good cycle.
He hopped across some rocks and sat on the little makeshift beach, letting his legs dangle in the pool close to Lissa’s rock. “I’m sorry. I’m not used to worrying about someone. If you’d been hurt, or worse …” He looked away. “I care about you, more than I care about most people. And I worry. About the risks you take. About when you leave, when I won’t be able to look out for you. Please …” He cleared his throat. “Please take care of yourself.”
“I don’t have a death wish, or whatever it is you think is wrong with me.” She swirled her finger in an infinity shape in the water. “I just … being impulsive is fun. It’s what my parents taught me. They missed my first art showing when I was fourteen because they’d met the drummer of a rock band the night before in a bar and got backstage passes to a concert. We drove to another city the day before my big dance recital because the sunrise over the mountains called to them.” She looked up and gave him a defiant look. “And they were right. The landscapes in the morning light in those mountains were pure inspiration. They painted some of their best work there.”
“And?” For what? Dax didn’t care if her parents were the next coming of Van Gogh. Taking care of their kid should have been their first priority. He grabbed her hand, wanting the connection, and swirled that same infinity symbol with his thumb on her palm. “You don’t have to defend everything your parents did. Everyone makes mistakes. It’s okay to acknowledge they did, too.”
She clenched her hand, her nails biting into his flesh. “If my parents are wrong, if it’s a mistake for them to live life focusing on their passions instead of …” She stared up at him, her eyes wide and wet. “What am I left with? The fact that my parents didn’t … didn’t do their best by me? That they didn’t …”
Didn’t love her. He heard the words she’d spoken last night.
Dax tugged on her hand and drew her to sit next to him. He wrapped her in his arms, slowly rubbing her back, trying to stop her trembling through sheer force of will.
Forever Wild Page 14