by Layla Nash
“He’d mind the fuck out of it if he were here, Lacey, but he’s not. He would want you to be happy. If this guy makes you happy, then it’s good enough for me.” Harrison kissed the top of my head, like I was his little sister. “I still kind of want to kick his ass, so if you could just let me know where he lives, I’ll get right on that.”
It made me smile, and that time it didn’t hurt to do it. “Sure.”
We sat in the coffee shop for another hour, getting reacquainted and caught up on the dramas of the jackal pack and the hyena cackle, and for the first time in what felt like forever, I even laughed. It felt good to laugh, to relax, to be upfront with Harrison and not worry about what others thought of me.
But eventually Harrison checked his watch and sighed. “I’ve got to get back. We’ve got the Council later this afternoon, and I promised Zadie I’d help her with some of the inventory before then.”
I wobbled to my feet, dreading the Alphas Council and everything after it. “I think this might be my last Council.”
“Yeah?” Harrison’s eyebrows rose. “On purpose or are you expecting more challenges?”
I smiled again, and it came easier still. “I’m going to abdicate this afternoon. I want something different. For myself and for the cackle. We’ve been stuck in the violence for too long. I thought I could manage breaking into something better after Mother died, but then Cal was gone and... I just didn’t have the strength for something new. But you’re right, Harrison. Cal would want something better for me, for all of us. I don’t want to wait anymore.”
He hugged me tight and my arms immediately went around him as my throat prickled again, and I rested my head on his shoulder as I said goodbye to Cal. Harrison squeezed me and we both retreated. “I’m glad to hear it. Let me know if you need anything, Lacey, and remember you’re always welcome with us.”
“Thank you, Harrison. Give Zadie my love.” I watched him walk out of the coffee shop, more grateful than I could express, and took a shaky breath before I went to order another few shots of espresso. I needed a little more courage and energy to face the cackle and then the Council, and then the witches.
Too bad I couldn’t just walk away right then, but I needed to finish off BadCreek to feel okay about leaving the city. Whether Nick would still want to go with me remained to be seen. The barista handed me a stack of napkins and murmured her condolences for the breakup, and I didn’t bother to correct her. It felt like a breakup with all the grief and misery of the past year, and a little bit of cleansing wouldn’t hurt. I took the espresso and headed for my car. Cal had once said that if you found yourself walking through hell, the only thing to do was to keep walking. Eventually you’d get through it.
I’d been walking for a year and for the first time, the end was in sight. I could do it. I could find my “something better”—for myself, for the cackle, maybe even for the city.
I breathed easier and tilted my head back to catch the sunlight as I paused on the sidewalk. The beginning of the end. BadCreek wouldn’t know what hit it, and then Markus Keller would get what was coming to him.
Chapter Thirty-two
Nick
He woke up and immediately regretted it. Nick spent the whole night drinking and fighting, and it did little to keep the wolf at bay. The beast’s need to find Lacey and protect her clawed at him even in his dreams, and at least once he dreamed that the leprechaun chased them both. He woke up in a back alley behind a dumpster, in pain and alone, and for a long moment he considered shifting to his wolf form and never looking back.
But he dragged himself into a sitting position against the gritty brick wall and patted down his jacket for a half-crushed pack of cigarettes he was pretty sure he still had. The cigars had disappeared at some point, along with the second or third fifth of vodka. He never should have gone into the Russian bar.
Nick groaned and rubbed his forehead, squinting through the first rays of sunlight, and shook a cigarette out of the pack. Well, half a cigarette. The rest of it had been crushed and torn away. He picked a bit of tobacco from the pack and tried to stuff it into what remained of the cigarette, then looked around for his lighter. He thought he’d left nights like that behind him, and yet... it was far too easy to fall into old habits.
He managed to light the cigarette with the almost-empty lighter, and waited for the tobacco to soothe his headache. It didn’t do much, but it took the edge off and kept his hands from trembling quite so much. He waited an eternity to check his phone, dreading that maybe Kara called and was worried about where he ended up, but there was only one message: Reynard, that damn sorcerer. It didn’t say much, just told him to pick up the package at ten that morning.
Nick groaned again and started to push to his feet when he saw what time it actually was. He didn’t want to face the sorcerer hungover or at all, but the clock ticked on freeing Smith. Once the old man was loose and could wreak his own vengeance against his enemies, Nick stood a small chance of convincing Lacey to leave town with him. She had to understand. She would see how terrible her pack really was. Maybe someone would talk some sense into her, or he could take her to dinner and get her drunk and then they could fuck all night and she’d realize they were meant to be together.
He stopped at a bodega on the corner a few streets from Reynard’s basement dwelling, buying more cigarettes and a beer and some mouthwash, and used the dingy bathroom to splash water on his face and try to straighten up his clothes. Blood still splattered his shirt and parts of his jeans, but at least he’d remembered to take the shirt off before the fighting got serious.
Hair of the dog didn’t help a whole lot, so he got a bagel in the bodega after pounding the beer. Maybe carbs and beer would do well enough.
He still felt like a dog’s breakfast by the time he tapped on Reynard’s door, and the hint of incense that wafted from underneath the door made his head pound all the more. Nick rested his forehead on his forearm as he leaned against the doorjamb, wondering if the cool stone would make him feel better, but the door opened and the sorcerer frowned at him from a four-inch crack between the door and the jamb. “You’re late.”
Nick didn’t straighten from his lean, though he did tilt his head enough so he could look the sorcerer in the eye. “It’s been a rough week.”
“You smell terrible.” The sorcerer peered out at the alley behind Nick, wary of an ambush, and then thrust his hand through the small space between the door and Nick with a rolled piece of parchment. “Here.”
Nick took it, though he didn’t want to move more than absolutely necessary. “Did you find all the innocents within the compound?”
“Yes.” The sorcerer started to shut the door, but Nick shoved his foot in the way to block it from closing. Reynard’s eyes narrowed. “Be gone, wolf. You didn’t tell me the danger of looking at that place, and for that, you are lucky to escape unscathed. Do not test my patience. Do not call on me again.”
Nick frowned and straightened, uneasy with the sorcerer’s ire, and took a breath to question why the man was so frightened of BadCreek. Before he could speak, Reynard slammed the door and nearly broke Nick’s foot in the process. Nick didn’t leave, though, and instead stood on the doorstep while he unrolled the parchment. It was honest-to-God parchment, thick and smooth against his fingertips, and dark ink traced shapes on the surface. Except it was just an outline, a building schematic, with no useful numbers or detailed information to indicate where the women and children would be hiding within the compound.
He squinted at it, rolling and then unrolling the map, and then tried reorienting it to the opposite direction. Nothing changed. He cleared his throat and spoke to the door, hoping that the sorcerer still lingered nearby. “How does it work?”
Only silence answered. He tried again, but even the smell of incense had disappeared.
He didn’t wait long before dragging his ass back to the bears’ building and into his room. Lacey’s scent still lingered on his bed and in his bathroom, and made his he
art hurt along with his head. He showered and ate and had a little more vodka, waiting to feel better, and was still feeling half-dead when someone knocked on his door.
For a brief, bright moment, he thought it might have been Lacey, showing up to apologize and fuck him again. But it was Owen, blinking all slow and sleepy as he yawned and jerked his thumb over his shoulder. “Kaiser wants you to know there’s breakfast upstairs and then there’s a Council meeting this afternoon to figure out what the fuck we’re going to do about the assholes outside the city.”
“Great,” Nick said. At least he smelled better than he had when he woke up.
He followed Owen upstairs to the alpha bear’s apartment, managing a smile for his mate and the young ones running around. For some reason the little ones loved Nick, and as soon as he sat down, he had three knee-biters leaping on him and trying to climb his legs. Josie, Kaiser’s mate, looked just a touch apprehensive as she watched, but Nick just sprawled on the couch and let the kids do what they wanted. The wolf was never tense around the pups; he had an unlimited supply of patience when it came to them. Nick couldn’t remember any of their names to save his life, but the little boy bared his teeth in a mock snarl and Nick put the kid in a headlock to wrestle around.
Before things got out of hand, Nick handed the parchment to Kaiser. “This is supposed to show us where the women and children are hiding in the BadCreek compound.”
The alpha bear took it, turning it back and forth as he studied the lines, then looked at Nick. “It’s blank.”
He shrugged. “I’ve been told it works, and the sorcerer hasn’t misled me yet.”
“There’s always a first time,” Kara said with false cheer, flopping onto the couch next to him. She looked a little green around the gills, particularly as Josie brought Nick a bowl full of scrambled eggs and salsa. “Since when do you put up with sorcerers?”
“Since I needed his help,” he said. Nick thanked Josie and inhaled the eggs while elbowing the little kids away gently, and managed not to spill anything on them or the couch. “He’s an odd fellow but he’s got a price.”
“Everyone’s got a price,” Sasha muttered from where he basked in the sunlight near the window, his mate leaning against his side. Some darkness crossed his expression, and Nick ignored it so he didn’t end up in the ditch with the Chechen.
Kaiser didn’t respond to the other bear’s glum sentiments, and instead frowned at the parchment. “So it’s magic.”
“Your guess is as good as mine,” Nick said. “It might be one of those things that doesn’t turn on until you need it.”
The alpha bear wasn’t impressed. “And we’re supposed to trust this to show us the way when we attack the BadCreek compound? A blank piece of paper with some lines on it, from a sorcerer?”
Nick leaned his head back against the couch cushion, wondering how long he could nap before he had to get his shit together to face the witches and whatever they wanted him to do to free Smith.
It wasn’t long enough. Even with a nap and a gallon of water and more fried foods than he’d eaten in years, Nick still felt like shit by the time he followed Kaiser into the Alphas Council room in the heart of the city. Somewhere to the east, Smith’s oak tree pulsed with death and magic. The witch already did something to prepare; Nick felt it like static in his blood. His muscles twitched as he slouched in and took a chair behind the bears’ table, though Kaiser and Axel took the two seats at the table. The rest of the alphas were already there, including Lacey.
Lacey.
Just the sight of her made him feel better. His headache dissipated and his heart eased, and everything that had been bothering him evaporated. How could she not feel the same? How could she ignore the connection between them?
She avoided looking at him, and instead kept her attention on Logan Chase, the lion alpha, as he and his lawyer brother stood in front of the hyenas’ table. A young woman sat next to Lacey, perhaps her new number two, and that hyena periodically looked at Nick with a question in her eyes.
He wanted to know the question. He thought, just maybe, that he had the answer.
Chapter Thirty-three
Lacey
Even later that afternoon, as I walked into the Council room, I still felt off-balance and like everything I’d known about my life had been wrong. It didn’t seem possible. How could Cal not tell me he knew who his mate was, and that she wasn’t me? It created a new kind of pain in my heart, that this woman—whoever she was—was told by Cal that he didn’t love her like a mate. It shouldn’t have been possible, to find someone you loved more than your mate. It wasn’t supposed to be possible.
The world moved in slow motion around me, or maybe it was me that moved differently. If Cal wasn’t my mate, then my mate was still out there. I wouldn’t ever love anyone the way I’d loved Cal, but... love could be different. My mate wouldn’t ever replace Cal in my heart; Cal was there to stay. I’d never stop loving him and the time we’d had together, and I knew that I would always mourn that we didn’t have more time. That we’d never made that trip around the world, exploring all the wild and far-flung places that weren’t even on the map. But I could take him with me when I went.
Savannah, still looking a bit bruised and beaten up, waited for me in the chamber set aside for the hyenas, her expression hovering between worried and exhausted. “There you are. I got your message.”
“I’m glad,” I said. I put down my bag and shrugged out of my jacket, easing myself to sit in the massive leather chair reserved for the queen. “How are you feeling? How is the cackle?”
“Okay,” she said, watching me with an odd expression. “Where have you been hiding?”
“I had coffee with Harrison.” I concentrated on straightening some papers on the table next to where I sat. “I needed to clear my head about some things, and I didn’t know... I needed to know what Cal might have thought.”
Savannah sank into one of the other chairs, wincing a little as she moved her right leg. Cass had really done a number on her; even with superior shifter healing, she still moved like she hurt. Guilt ate at me as I avoided looking directly at her. She rubbed the back of her neck, taking a deep breath. “Yeah?”
I didn’t know if it was the right thing. Maybe I’d never know. “I think I got what I needed. As soon as we take care of this BadCreek business, there will be big changes coming.”
Her eyebrows rose. “Yeah?”
A smile tugged at my mouth, though I didn’t think any of it was funny. “The kind of changes I should have made a year ago. It’ll be okay, Sav. We’ve just got to get through tonight.”
“That’s always easier said than done with you,” she said under her breath, but answered with a tentative smile of her own. “It’s good to have you back, Lacey.”
It was good to be back, just in time to walk away for good. The cackle deserved more than me, and I deserved more than it. And maybe... maybe I deserved a chance to stand on my own—outside of my mother’s shadow, outside of the family’s obligations, and well beyond my own history. I could be Lacey somewhere else, and figure out who Lacey really was. Without Cal, without my mother, without the rest of the hyenas... who the hell was I?
I nodded and leaned to retrieve a bottle of bourbon from where I’d stashed it months earlier. It had come from my mother’s private stash; at least she had good taste in liquor, despite her many other faults. I splashed a bit into two glasses, handing Sav one before clinking mine against hers. “To the future, Sav. To the best of our past and everything that’s still to come.”
She laughed, sniffing at the bourbon before taking a tentative sip. “Now you’re scaring me, cuz.”
I let the warm liquor slide down my throat and settle in my stomach, radiating heat through me. “Then buckle up, babe, because shit’s about to get real.”
“Just promise me you’re not going to do anything crazy.”
I pushed to my feet, laughing. “Come on, Sav. What would be the fun in that?”
“I should have brought more bodyguards,” she said, trailing after me into the hall and in the direction of the much larger Council chamber. “Or an elephant tranquilizer gun. Handcuffs.”
“Sounds like a hell of a Friday night,” a gruff voice said, and I glanced back to find Miles Evershaw leaning against the wall, his eyebrow arched in challenge as his eyes flashed gold. “Need some company?”
“You, Evershaw? Never.” The smile fell off my face and the familiar mask of queen bitch of the hyenas returned, as safe and comforting as a suit of armor. I didn’t even pause as I walked by the wolf alpha, irritated that he straightened up and followed after me into the Council room. “What do you want?”
“Just curious about a few rumors I’ve heard lately,” he said, rubbing his jaw and the hint of stubble there. The man needed to either shave or grow out the beard, because he just looked homeless, not sexy. Not that the jackass could look sexy. “Something about you having a fancy for wolves. Imagine that. I wouldn’t mind being king of the hyenas, it’s got—“
I turned fast enough to startle him, and grabbed a fistful of his shirt to haul him up to his toes. And I was strong enough to do it, too, which took Evershaw by surprise as well. I met his gaze with a stony one of my own. “One of these days, Evershaw, that mouth will write a check your ass won’t be able to cash. Back off.”
He gripped my wrist and squeezed until my bones creaked, and I was forced to release him. He brushed off the front of his shirt, unperturbed by my little outburst, and he even moved to flick lint off my shoulder. “Dear Lacey. Dear, sweet little Lacey. You’re lucky I don’t believe in hitting women.”