Koen stilled, and stripped his brother with a glare. “What have you told her?”
Nikolai shrank back. “Well, when she was cleaning my cut she had a few questions. I just told her the truth.”
“You were with her for all of five minutes,” Koen pointed out, exasperated.
“Yes, well, she can be quite persuasive and commanding. Nobody said I had to keep the truth from her. She asked if I knew about her and I said she was probably the daughter of Almeria and Mikhail.” He tapped his chin, thinking. “She asked if there were many women like here where I came from, and I told her there were a few hundred Chosen born to be dragon mates, but that there had only been a handful of high princess like her. She asked if she was considered equal rank to you on Tzion, and I explained that you are king, so no, but that she was closer than most.”
Koen’s mouth dropped “And?”
“And nothing. She asked if you had a dragon mate and I told her to talk to you.” Nikolai looked sheepish. “I’m judging by your reaction she never asked?”
Koen hung his head and gritted his teeth. Marina knew much more than he had first thought. It made him look upon her words and actions in a whole new light. Why hadn’t she said anything to him? Looking on her behavior with hindsight, her sighing, and offense to how he treated her took on a whole new meaning. She had asked about Tatiana and he had avoided answering, the pain too much to comprehend. Was she insecure?
“She did seemed to have something on her mind,” Koen admitted. “As usual, my presence as a man upset her, distracted her.”
“Understandable,” Daniil said. “Go now. Go to her, and tell her who you are and, what she is.”
Koen fisted his hands. “I cannot.”
Daniil stood. “You will not, but that is fine. I can do it for you. It is my duty as a dragon lord to ensure she understands what respect she should be afforded. You may be king, but she is a princess of our land, and she has rights outside of your relationship with her.”
Daniil took two steps towards the exit before Koen leapt up and planted himself front of him, nose to nose, ready to rip him apart. “No,” she growled. “You endanger her.”
Nikolai was abruptly beside Koen, puling his shoulder back to create space between them. “If she means so little why is it such a big deal to tell her? Daniil is right. If it ever got out we found a high princess and abandoned her here it would bring dishonor upon House Raad.”
Koen’s head whipped around. “I never said she meant little to me.” His eyes drifted to the cave mouth, where Marina had gone. “Quite opposite.”
“Then let Daniil tell her.”
The fear of such a thing was overwhelming. Koen knew what she would so and it hurt his heart. “She will want to come home with us.”
Sensing he had calmed, Nikolai took his hand off his shoulder. The look in his eyes was compassionate. “That is such a bad thing?”
“How can you ask that?” Koen whispered.” If she stays here, she is safe. If she returns with me she dies.”
“I think she would blossom. We would care for her. I don’t know if you’ve realized, but there is a great sadness that hovers over her. I don’t know why, but it is palpable.” Nikolai smiled. “I read women well.”
“Almeria is dead. Marina grieves her.”
Daniil sighed heavily. “You want to protect her. I understand, really, but accept what you are trying to deny her is wrong. Marina is of House Zar. You know as well as I do, council mon Mikhail has no idea of her existence. She is his kin. We have to tell him, and we have to take her back. If she chooses to enter Aver that is her right, and you cannot refuse her that.”
Koen’s brows drew together as he thought of Marina. How she felt in his arms. How fragile she was when his hands were on her. “She is so small. Our world will crush her.”
“You forget the woman faced our dragons to protect you,” Nikolai said. “With nothing but a rock in her and a curse on her lips. Koen, she’s perfect. She naturally stepped into the role destiny has chosen for her. Your protector.”
Frantically searching for a reason to deny what needed to be done, Koen shook his head. “I won’t do this … I won’t turn her head with sweet promises of a future we can never have.”
“You are denying both yourself and her the change of a glorious future,” Daniil said. “One filled with happiness and love. Dragons dream their entire lives of the mate that will finally claim them. You would give yours up for nothing?”
Koen’s eyes closed and his jaw clenched. “You speak as if I’m some fool who has too much pride or honor to claim her, as if I simply am too afraid to confront my feelings for her. We are talking about her life. If she were to return with us and be marked First Chosen… .” The very idea horrified him in ways they could not begin to imagine. “I can’t do it. I could never sit there and watch her fight for me knowing that any moment would be her last. We would be separated. She would be there always just out of reach and I– I will not.”
He opened his eyes, at peace with his decision, and ready to convince them what e thought was best. He started when Daniil was no longer there.
Nikolai jumped in front of him. “He left when you said the word fool. It’s too late.”
Koen shoved his brother out of the way and rushed out the cave. He hurried to the lake and spotted Daniil already speaking to Marina.
He stopped, hidden in the shadow of the trees, his heart thumping as he watched them.
Silhouetted by moonlight, he thought Marina the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. Her face paled to bone white at whatever Daniil said, and he thought she would swoon. She trembled slightly then stiffened her back, nodding her head once.
He was a coward. It was wrong for Daniil to be the one to tell her. Left with no choice, Koen dug deep, and stepped out of the shadows.
Chapter 9
Marina dialed Cathryn, and bit her lip as the phone rang through to voicemail. It was wrong to be relieved, but now she could leave a message and not worry about Cat freaking out until after there was nothing she could do about it. Marina knew her friend could be freakishly resourceful when it came to hunting her down.
“Cat, it’s me. Okay, I know that you’re going to feel responsible for letting me out of your sight for more than five minutes, but I need you not to worry, okay. I’m … leaving for a while. I can’t tell you where, you’d never believe me.” Marina gripped the phone tighter. “Do you remember those stories my mother would tell us as girls when we had sleepovers, about dragons? Well, they weren’t stories, Cat, they were memories. My mother wasn’t from here, and neither am I, not really. I was born here, but I was created somewhere else. Remember the dragon I told you I found? You asked his name. It’s Koen Raad. He’s from there, and before you go mad, yes, I’m crossing dimensions for a guy, but he’s worth it. I’m sorry I couldn’t–”
The line disconnected and Marina knew she had run out of time. Her explanation had sucked. She stared down at the phone, wondering what was best.
She should go back and explain properly. She had the time. The only problem was Marina was worried if she took her eyes off Koen for too long he would disappear in a puff of smoke back to Tzion leaving her behind. She couldn’t get there on her own and he was mulish enough to carry out his decision to the end.
“Princess?” Daniil called softly from behind her. “May I speak with you?”
She schooled her face when Daniil’s came to stand beside her. “Princess, huh?” she asked, and watched as his face lit with humor and his blue eyes twinkled.
“Indeed.” He clasped his hands behind his back. “I don’t have much time to be delicate about this so excuse my bluntness.” He watched her with a kind expression on his face and touched the side of her head gently. “Why do you cut your hair?”
“What is it with you guys and my hair? I cut it, big deal.”
“Long hair is a woman’s beauty.”
“Are you saying I’m not beautiful?”
His eyes widened. “No. You ar
e one of the most beautiful creatures I have ever beheld. For me, there is only one who surpasses you.”
She put on a face of mock severity and haughtily lifted her nose. “More beautiful than me? Humph. I think not, I’ll deal with her soon enough.” His expression dropped and paled. Startled by his reaction, she wrinkled her nose and gave a hangdog smile. “That was a joke, Daniil. Apparently, a bad one.”
He breathed out and nodded slowly, genuinely relieved. “Your hair is lovely, but I cannot help wonder what it would look like flowing over your shoulders.”
She rubbed her head, smiling. “I like it this way. My mother liked to cut her hair short too. I’ve never known someone to be so pleased by something so simple.”
“Your mother is part of what I want to talk to you about.”
“Yeah, figured that when you guys that you were so interested in her.”
“Oh?”
She shrugged. “You and Nikolai are not exactly subtle, and Koen has revealed more to me than he realizes. I’ll fill in the gaps eventually. You’re refreshingly direct with your words and actions.” She beamed and laughed. “Like my mother was.”
“And here I thought you and Koen as a human were having difficulties speaking to each other without coming to blows.”
She scowled and narrowed her eyes. “Him,” she hissed. “Well, we’re doing fine at the moment.”
“But …you haven’t spoken directly to each other since you returned from your walk.”
“True. It’s better that way, less arguments. I’ll be welcoming the dragon back with open arms.”
“This is the most peaceful and calm I have seen him a long time.”
“Wait, I’ve been dealing with a calm and peaceful Koen Raad? Bloody hell. Maybe I shouldn’t be diving headfirst into the emotional quagmire that is him. I thought possibly once we got over the whole, you are mine, thing, we could have worked it out, but….”
“Oh.” Nikolai tapped his hand on his thigh. “Then maybe we were being hard on Koen for no reason. Nikolai and I were under the impression that you were in love with him.”
Marina closed her eyes as the words ricocheted inside her mind. Love. She felt the blood drain from her face and her body rocked. She nodded her head to herself, but when she opened her eyes, there was censure in her gaze. “That is something I haven’t looked to closely at. Even if it were true, it would be something only Koen and I should discuss. If we could get passed flinging insults at each other, of course.”
“Of course. I’m here to ask you to be firm with him. He plans to leave. Without you.”
Marina plucked imaginary lint off her shoulder to give her time to school her reaction. Whatever lies she told Daniil to make herself seem less hopelessly infatuated by Koen were blowing up in her face. Big time. The thought of him leaving her, forever, made her want to vomit.
“I know that, and it’s not happening,” she said confidently. ‘He will be taking me with him.”
“And if he doesn’t? You have to accept the possibility that he won’t see reason and will leave without you.” Nikolai patted her hand. “As pessimistic as I sound, I’m here because I have faith you can reach him. Koen has always been difficult.”
“His dragon is straightforward,” she murmured. “It’s so strange the creature and the man can be so different.”
“They are one in the same,” Daniil reminded. “Koen’s dragon is kind to you because he cares for you. In beast form, we let our emotions and instincts guide us. Koen is not bound by tradition, or honor, or the limitations of his waking mind when in dragon form. He can be free with you then.”
“I see that. The second he becomes a man he can’t stand me.”
“And you him?”
Marina cringed. “Not entirely true. Sure he’s arrogant, rude and egotistical but there’s something about his scowl that makes me want to kiss him all over.” She sighed dreamily. “He gives me butterflies in my chest.”
“It warms my heart to hear it. Make him see that he needs you.”
“I’ll give it my best shot, but it’s not like I have months to build trust. If I can’t change his mind in time you can take me, and I can deal with it in your world.”
Daniil slowly shook his head. “I won’t force you on him. Koen has been through much in his life, and there is only so much I can interfere before I become one of the forces pushing against him, and that won’t do. I meddle because I care. Koen is not my blood brother, but he treats me as if I am. I’m from a great House in its own right, but I owe a lot to Koen. He gives me the support of his House in my endeavors. For all his faults, he is honorable, and I wouldn’t see him hurt. If he doesn’t take you Marina, if his heart is truly set against you coming with us, I will not go against his wishes.”
“Kol!” Koen growled threateningly as he approached.
Daniil stepped aside and inclined his head. “Raad.” With an encouraging smile at Marina, he gave them privacy.
The second Koen had come into her line of sight, her body had started gearing up. Marina rubbed slick palms on her sides and prayed her body wasn’t going to self-destruct. They needed to get the messy, emotional stuff over with first.
Sharing was like a band-aid; just rip that fucker off.
“Koen?”
“What?” He sounded annoyed.
“We are going to hold a conversation without arguing now. Understand?”
“About?”
Marina already found her own enforced plea to not argue hard to stick by. “Me coming with you.”
He cocked his head. “I thought you did that second time.”
“Cute.”
“You love me.” The way he said it was accusatory. “It’s disturbing.”
“I do love the dragon,” she confessed, confused. “The man … I lust after.” She ran her eyes over the long length of him, astonished that she had been all over him, astonished they had made it work even with their considerable size difference.
“They are the same, Marina. How can you love one and not the other?”
She rubbed her eyes. “I don’t know. Who the fuck am I? Freud? I’m standing here contemplating whether or not I’m in love with a dragon. That is impossible on so many different levels it hurts my head. When you are the dragon, I wish for the man. When you’re the man, I wish for the dragon.” She threw her hands up. “God knows what’s wrong with me.”
He turned away. “No. We cannot talk about it. I have made my choice.”
“Please?” God, maybe she wanted his love more than she realized, the man made her say please.
“I dislike changing my mind.”
She stomped around him, and shoved his chest. “I dislike the way you dismiss me when something potentially troublesome comes up in discussion.” She decided to try a new approach. She held up her phone. “I called my friend Cathryn. I told her a bit about who I am, and that I’d be gone for a while. I’m ready to leave with you, Koen.”
“Ah,” was his response. He looked passed her like with a pained expression on his face. “And who are you exactly, Marina?”
“It seems so ridiculous. I keep telling myself it’s impossible, but to be honest it explains a lot. Your arrogance is what helped me be brave enough to ask Nikolai the questions. Someone like you would never deign to bother speaking to somebody not of equal or greater rank when all you want is to be left alone. What I would like to know is why you hate me so much that you would keep the truth from me?” She pushed down a wave of emotion. Her hand motioned to him than her. “I thought that … yes we fight, because you’re so bad-mannered, but I thought that there was something stronger between us than that.”
His gaze snapped to hers. “I can honestly say that the thought of you coming to Tzion fills me with dread.”
Again, his eyes moved away. He wasn’t bothering to look at her anymore. She felt like a buzzing fly around the head of a tiger. Unnoticeable. It was getting old.
“Well then, I guess that’s that then… no … see, I’m sho
cked I can feel this way, feel so deeply without it being reciprocated.”
He laughed without humor, and his dark eyes fixed on her combusted with heat before she could prepare herself not to be scorched by it. Koen clasped her chin, and slanted his mouth over hers. He bruised her with his kiss, made her heart race, fuck it, he made her wet, and Marina could almost touch his fire for her. She craved that burn, yearned for his brand, and god, if he didn’t have the most crafty tongue in the cosmos.
He let her go, and pushed her aside, once again focusing on the lake. Fuck reciprocation, his ass was hers whether he wanted it to be or not.
“I should not have called you mine,” he said. “You are treasure, but I cannot keep you.”
Hot and squirmy, her chin snapped back defiantly. It was better to know the truth than wallow in confusion. If she was wrong, and Koen didn’t feel the same, she didn’t want to waste her time or throw any more of her affection away. The acceptance of his lack of affection did not mean she’d let him swagger away without taking what her body needed from him. Multiple times. “Because you don’t care for me?”
He couldn’t meet her eyes. “Ask Daniil and Nikolai your questions.”
“And you’re okay with that? You’re okay with me asking them about you and your life, about your home?”
“Tzion is their home too.”
“I’m not interested in them like I am you. Tzion holds no appeal when I take you out of it.” She was small enough that even when he ducked his head she could lean forward to meet his gaze. “I know that I’m from there, but that doesn’t make it home. I’m not thrilled about giving up my life here to run over there. My mother was a good person, wise, and if she left and brought me here, I can be sure there was a good reason. If I had met Nikolai or Daniil, and they had told me all this, I would have been curious, but would’ve simply said goodbye when they left. They would be fond memories to tell my grandchildren one day. I would tell them that they were descendant from dragon royalty. I’m going for you.” She pushed on, resolved to take on more chance to get him to open up to her. “You want me. I feel that.” Lord, did she feel it, down to her tippy toes. “But I don’t know why you push me away. Tell me, and I promise I’ll do everything to remove the obstacle so you don’t have to be afraid to love me.” She would drop kick the shit of that obstacle if it meant Koen Raad could be called hers.
Smolder (Dragon Souls) Page 9