by Unknown
“Good. I just pulled into the lot with Naomi.”
“Oh, goodie,” I laugh. “I’ll see you in a few,” I tell her before pushing the end call button. I place it on the counter, open the fridge, and a few moments later my front door flies open.
“Are you crazy?” Naomi shouts at me.
“Want to calm it down, a bit?” I ask her.
“I can’t believe you were on a dirt bike, and he took you on the track!” She’s clearly freaking out. “Charlie, that does not sound like you. At all!”
“Oh, please. Pipe it down. It was fun, and I would even consider doing it again.”
They stare at me in shock. “Says the girl who flips her lid every time Nate is out on the track.” Halley states the obvious.
“Right. And do you both remember that I wanted to try new things and not be such a fuddy-duddy anymore? This was my chance to do so. So, I took it. Plus, you weren’t there at the end. You missed all of the stupid drama with Shelley.”
“Oh, we heard. Holt’s in hot water with Halley,” says Naomi.
“I can’t believe he gave her a ride home! Please tell me she wasn’t all over him.” Halley pleads with me.
“Okay. I won’t tell you.” I turn my attention back to the fridge, trying to assemble something easy and quick for dinner.
“What?” she asks.
I sigh. “He was doing us a favor by trying to make her leave before she found herself face-down in the dirt, by yours truly. Yes, she tried to cast her net over him, but he wasn’t falling into her trap.”
“Right.” Halley shakes her head. “Between her and Lisa, I’m thinking I’m done visiting the guys out at the track.”
“Don’t get so huffy now. He didn’t do anything wrong. She was being ridiculous, and he was cutting off the drama before it came to blows. Cut the man some slack, will you? Besides,” I look over my shoulder at her. “She’s not even into him. She’s was trying to goad me—and Nate—but we didn’t fall for it.”
“I know. She just makes me so mad. I can’t help but be crazy sometimes when she or Lisa plays these games.”
“If anyone has a right to be ticked off here, it’s me and Charlie.” Naomi reminds Halley.
“She has a point,” I turn my attention back to the task at hand. “So, let’s not talk about either one of them, and instead move on to a better topic. Like—what are we going to do for dinner?”
“I vote for dinner, a movie, and you telling us all about that ride.” Naomi plants her butt into one of the chairs at the kitchen table. “But not necessarily in that order.”
“Right. I’m thinking we should order in.” Halley confirms, as she pulls out my menu stash from a kitchen drawer.
“I’m so hungry, I’ll eat from whatever place you decide to pick.” I tell her, as I head down the hall. “But I’m changing first.”
In the end, we ordered Chinese take-out, watched 27 Dresses, and plotted ways to keep the guys away from the race track. Even though, they’ve been going less and less over the last month, or two, we still planned ways to keep them off for the rest of the summer, at least.
“What’s going on with you, and Charlie?” Tucker questions me, while we work out at the gym two days after the track. It’s Saturday, and I really needed this. I’ve been a bit neglectful of my work-out regimen.
“The same as you, Holt, and the girls.”
“I don’t know. I think it’s a little more special with her than you’re letting on.”
“Possibly, but if it’s special for us, then it’s the same for you and Holt.” I really don’t want to hash this topic out with the guys at the gym, but it looks like that’s the case, since I know Holt can’t keep his mouth shut.
“You don’t plan on breaking Charlie’s heart, do you? I like to think of her as the sister I’ve never had.” Holt voices his displeasure.
“I don’t plan on it, no. I’m not a jerk, man.”
“Have you even talked to her about your family?” I can hear the concern in Tucker’s voice as he questions me.
“No. And I don’t plan on it, either.” I continue to lift the bar with weights over my head, then drop it back down to my chest and up again.
“Why?” Holt seems confused, but he really shouldn’t be. He knows the score.
“That would imply that we’re headed into forever, here. You know my rules on being fully committed. It’s not a goal in my life.”
Holt narrows his eyes at me, as he starts working out his biceps. “Seriously?”
“Look, I really like her, and if I were a man who could give her his heart, completely—” I quirk a brow at him, stopping him from saying anything else, “I would. But you know that’s not me. Not after my mom. I just can’t. If I could, I would have made it work with Heather.”
“I think you should take a chance on her, man.” Tucker pushes. “She would be good for you. Her family would be great for you, too, after what you said about your visit with them. And didn’t you promise to go up there again?” he asks, while he works on his leg presses.
“Yes, but that’s not going to happen.” I tell them, as I sit up on the bench, and wipe the sweat off my face.
“I can’t believe you right now.” Holt shakes his head at me, in a disapproving way.
“What?” I ask them both. “And hold up a minute. What about you two? What’s the deal with Halley and Naomi?”
“That’s a different story all together, and you know it. We don’t have the same hang-ups as you.” Holt replies in a clipped tone. “Don’t even try to turn this around on us. We like the girls, and we’ll take it to wherever it’s going, but we’re not in a race to the altar here.” He looks to Tucker for back up. Tuck gives us a chin lift in solidarity.
“We’re not trying to get up in to your business, or tick you off. And I know Holt didn’t mean anything by the hang-up comment. Right?” He looks at Holt to assure us that he didn’t mean to be a jerk about my issues.
“Right.” he confirms.
“We like Charlie a lot, and we can see she’s head over heels for you. I think she may even be in love with you.” Tucker shocks the ever-loving life out of me at that.
“Love?” I falter in my steps, on my way to a new weight machine. It’s nice and quiet here this early in the morning. We practically have the gym to ourselves.
“Uh—,” he looks over to Holt, not sure in how he should proceed.
“You haven’t caught on to that fact, yet?” Holt looks on in disbelief at me.
“No. Hence the reason I’m in shock over here.”
“To be fair to Charlie, I don’t think she fully realizes it, either. The way she watches your every move, and how she gazes at you? She’s definitely in love with you, bro,” says Tucker.
I feel dumbfounded by this revelation. “How did I not see that coming?” I ask, more to myself, than to them.
“You’ve been living in la-la land for the last few months!” Holt tries to lighten up the mood. “How could you not clue in to her feelings by now?” he wonders out loud.
“I thought that was the reason you haven’t had many dates with her on your own.” Tucker tries to reason why we’ve been hanging out more than normal, rather than me flying solo.
“Safety in numbers. You know how I operate,” I remind them.
“Right, we do, but you’ve been different with Charlie. That’s why we wanted to know what was going on. Now, I see we shouldn’t have brought it up.” Holt shakes his head and goes back to his bicep curls.
“No. No, this is good. I’m glad you pointed it out. You’re right, I have been clueless. I mean, not completely, obviously. I know we have this pull with each other, but I’ve been trying to figure out a way to distance myself without hurting her in the process.”
I hear them both groan, and Tucker lets the weights on the back of his machine drop with a loud clang. “Really? You can’t be serious!”
“As a heart attack.”
“That’s just plain stupid,” Holt replies
.
“Didn’t you just share a piece of your soul with her not more than two days ago? Why else would you continue to share your self and the track with her? Let alone take her out joy riding on the back of your dirt bike?” Tucker seems even more baffled, as this conversation goes on.
“You’ve only had one girl on the back before, and that was Shelley. I’m still trying to figure that one out, years later.” Holt looks at me, trying to figure me out.
“There wasn’t anything special to it at the time. I was messed up and being stupid back then, and you both know it. Have I let anyone else on my bike, since? No.”
“See? That right there just proves your feelings for Charlie.” Holt points out.
“Right. It does. It’s also why I need to put the brakes on a little more firmly.” They both look at me in dismay, but I know they get where I’m coming from. “Look, you both know that her anniversary is coming up, and how hard that time is for me, not to mention my family. It’s going to be a rough week. It always is. I don’t want Charlie to see that. It’s best to start the process of pulling back now.” I try to compel them with my arguments for this horrible idea. I know it’s a bad plan, but it’s the only one I have in my head at the moment. “Do you have a better solution?” I ask them.
“Yeah, actually, I do.” Holt voices in irritation.
“Yep. I do too, and it’s the same one as Holt’s.”
“No. I’m not telling her. She shouldn’t be burdened with my sorrows year after year. You guys know how I get. How is that going be for her? I don’t want to be a douche to her every flipping year. I’m already a big enough jerk to you, my dad, and my sister for a least a week.”
“Right, but we’re still here for you. You’re not even giving her a shot to do the same. She’s a part of you now. She’s under your skin, and in your heart. You know it even if you want to fight it.” Tucker states his case on the matter of my feelings.
“You know, Nate, it’s okay to let someone new in. It’s okay to let that person be Charlie. She can hold your hand and see you through your darkest days, and be your light at the end of the spiral you go into.” Holt says, in a more hushed voice.
“You can’t live like this, year after year. It’s already been eight. Haven’t you put yourself through enough pain? You need to start healing, brother. We love you, and you know we’ll always be here, through thick and thin, but one day—you’re going to need to let someone else be that shoulder to lean on. Just think about it being Charlie. She cares for you deeply. Don’t push her away.” Tucker gets up from his weight machine and walks away, leaving me speechless.
I look over at Holt. He’s watching Tucker walk away before he sadly looks at me. He, too, gets up and heads towards the locker rooms. I’m left standing here wondering, what just happened, and when did my life get so complicated?
IT’S THE FOLLOWING FRIDAY, ALMOST a week since the gym incident with the guys. All week long, I’ve been trying to push aside that conversation we had. Thankfully, it’s been a busy week, so I haven’t taken the time to examine their words too closely. I decided it was time to take Charlie out, one-on-one, as she deserves it. I haven’t been fair, if I’m being honest with myself. However, I still stand firm on my decision that she doesn’t need to be weighted down with my sorrows. Why do that to a good woman, like Charlie? Besides, I don’t need the pity that I know I would see if I told her.
So, tonight it’s all about Charlie. I’m taking her out, not only because I really want to see her, but to prove to myself, that we can continue to keep this going as it is, minus the personal and deep emotions. I’ve checked my baggage at the door, and so far, it seems she doesn’t have any. I know I’ve been contemplating applying the brakes on us, though I’ve not done a great job of it. It’s been easier to brush it off and enjoy what we have, even if it’s mostly time spent with our friends.
“Where are we headed, cowboy?” Charlie asks, as we travel down the freeway.
“I thought I would take you to do something fun!”
“Every time we’re together, I have a fun time.” She softly admits.
“I’m glad, sweetheart.” I give her a tender smile. “There’s one small problem, though.” Frowning now as I notice where she’s sitting. I can’t help it. I like the closeness of her body, and to be able to touch her hand as I drive. It goes against keeping certain things in check, however— it reminds me of my parents in years past, which is something I’ve always enjoyed, and wanted for myself. Until I decided it was too intimate. With Charlie, it feels natural to crave it, so I let it slide and push my limits every chance I can.
“Oh?” She looks perfectly perplexed.
“You haven’t figured it out?”
“Uh—no?”
“You’re in the wrong seat, little one.” She gives me a sheepish look but slides over on the bench seat to sit right next to me, where I like her.
“So? Where are we off to?” she tries again.
“I thought we would head over to the airport. They have a decent selection of places to eat, though BBQ sounds good right about now. I figured afterward we could head to Yogurt Zone for dessert. We could even cozy up in the back of the truck bed to watch as flights take off and land. Though, just saying— I’m not opposed to the idea of shopping, if you want. There is one thing I really want to do.”
“Oh? Did you want to learn how fly a plane or something?”
“One day, maybe. Though I prefer to keep my feet firmly planted on the ground. So, no. But I do want to play a game of chess.”
“Chess?” She gives me a crazy look. “Uh, I hate to break it to you, but I only reserve board games for my family dinners.” She gives me a disgruntled face.
“Trust me, this is one you’ll want to play.”
“Yeah, but I think I’ll have to pass.” She’s settling in on being stubborn, I can tell.
“No, really. It’s a giant chess board. The pieces are probably your height.” She scrunches her nose at me. “What? I can’t help that you’re fun-sized!” she shakes her head, fighting like hard not to laugh. “Just let the laugh out. You can’t deny it.” I laugh myself, as I squeeze her knee, where I know she’s ticklish.
“Whatever,” she giggles, trying to push my hand away. “Okay. I could play one game with you, on two conditions.”
I raise my eyebrow at her. “Oh, who’s making conditions now? Fine, what will they be, your highness?
“One, you can’t tell my family I played a game outside of the house.” Now I look at her like she’s nuts. “Trust me. I’ll never live it down. And two, you can’t take any photos of this event. I won’t have any blackmail held over me!”
I can’t help but laugh at her, and her crazy requests.
“I can’t promise you anything. I might want to document this momentous occasion, for proprietary sake.” She rolls her eyes.
“I’ll hijack your phone if you dare take a photo!” I don’t take any stock into her empty threats. She’s too short to reach for it over my head anyway, not that I would tell her that. I don’t need to angry the little beast any further.
I’m still laughing at her, and gently squeeze her thigh one more time, then lean over and place a quick kiss on her lips. Grinning, I turn my focus back to the road. “We’ll see. I make no promises.”
And I’m glad I didn’t promise her anything, though I would probably give her whatever she wanted. I couldn’t help but take a few photos of her on the sly. We had dinner, walked around the mall, and grabbed frozen yogurt. Of course, she had to lick mine. She just had to test the flavor to make sure she didn’t want the same thing. Which, of course she didn’t. Good thing I don’t mind swapping spit with her.
We played a few games of chess—which I dominated every game. I couldn’t even give her one, it was getting pretty sad. I ended up taking pity on her and quitting after three games. She was a good sport about it, and mostly laughed. I think there were a few times she was ready to jump me, and take me down like an angry wrest
ler. Now, we’re sitting in the bed of my truck, warming up under a couple heavy blankets, as we watch the planes come and go.
It’s a quiet crisp evening, except for the loud planes, as we huddle together under the blankets, trying to keep each other warm. We haven’t spoken much. It’s nice to enjoy just being here, with each other, and away from the hustle of people, and life.
“Thank you for tonight. I had a lot of fun, even if I wanted to pound you into the ground. I still think my dad could beat you at a life-size chess game.” She chuckles.
“Bring it.” I pull her into me a bit more, as I stare up into the night stars. “I had a great evening, too. I appreciate every moment we share. You make it easy to spend time with you. I love that about you, Charlie. You’re so easy going, and I love your cute feisty side, but how shy you are, too. It’s the best of both worlds when I’m with you.”
I hear her sigh in contentment as she hugs my middle tighter. “It’s you who makes it easy for me. I’ve not dated much, and I still feel new to the experience.”
“I would have never guessed. You would think, being the baby of a large family, you would be the loud and crazy one. You certainly surprise me. In a good way.”
“Well, sometimes it’s the quiet ones you have to watch out for.” She teases.
“Hmmm. I think I need to keep a closer eye on you, to make sure you don’t pull anything on me. Maybe I need a pow-wow with your brother. We guys need to stick together.”
“No way! He would fill your head with every embarrassing moment I have ever had!” she practically shouts.
“Well, you have threatened violence in the form of WWE wrestling moves.” I tease her. “Maybe I should have a care for concern when it comes to my well-being.”
“I think I should warn you that Anson taught me all that I know. He used to practice on me. I was the perfect size to throw around.” I can’t help back crack up.
“I think you probably had a crazy childhood.” I smile into the night, thinking about the kind of life she had, knowing I had a really good upbringing myself.
“I can’t say I threw my little sister around, but I sure did threaten every guy who tried to date her. I went as far as to tell them at school to keep away from her. She couldn’t figure out why the guys didn’t want to go out with her. She heard rumors that certain ones liked her, but didn’t get why they wouldn’t talk to her. She did find out later the real reason.” I laugh. “She, of course, didn’t laugh. She was ready to chase me with our dad’s hunting rifle. Good thing Holt, and Tuck were there. They had to help me escape the house for a while.”