by C. B. Stagg
“All right, let’s go.”
I thought the spread at the Hanson’s had been nice the night before, but it was nothing compared to what awaited us the next morning. Every kind of doughnut, kolache, and pastry imaginable was piled on the table, along with coffee, milk, and three different kinds of juice. I stopped in the doorway to take it all in.
“Now, don’t be expecting this every morning.” Bennett laughed. “Jill just thought today was special and wanted to celebrate.”
I nodded like I understood, but I didn’t. What were they celebrating? And why did they invite me?
Once Jase and I were seated, and Jill had given me one of practically everything, she explained her plans. “Now, Rebecca, I’m guessing you don’t have much by way of clothing, am I right?” I nodded. “And makeup? Do you wear makeup?”
I shook my head. That was a luxury I’d never been able to afford, even when my mom was alive.
“Well, of course she doesn’t wear makeup, Jill. Look at her. She’s beautiful.” Then Bennett looked at me, cupping my cheek in his calloused hands. “Don’t let anyone tell you that you need to put all that crap on your face. You’re pretty just the way you are. Isn’t that right, Jase?”
Not awkward at all.
He smiled, I smiled, we all just smiled like idiots.
“Now, Rebecca,” Jill started, her voice high-pitched and quick, “I’ve already been in touch with Marian Pearson, Jase’s mom?” I nodded, indicating that I knew who she was talking about. “She’s put in a call to her contact at social services, and if all goes well, you should be able to call this home, your home, in a day or two. Marian Pearson has a lot of pull downtown, and when she wants something done,” she snapped her fingers in the air, punctuating her statement, “it gets done.” I looked from Jill to Bennett to Jase, and all three were nodding.
My mind was reeling at the possibility of having a home and a bed to call my own, even if it was temporary. The old me would have been skeptical, wondering about the motives behind the Hanson’s generous offer to take me in. I knew why Toby had taken me in. He saw me as a possible moneymaker. He made no secret of that. But my short time with Jase had shown me there actually were good people in this world. Despite the cycle of disappointment my first fifteen years of life had seen, I trusted Jase. And because of that, I trusted the Hansons.
Jill and I hit an outlet mall on the outskirts of town. I’d never in my life seen one person spend so much money on things that couldn’t be smoked or snorted. And I had to admit, the woman had style.
“I didn’t even think to ask if you had a favorite store. We can go wherever you want. So, do you? Have a favorite store?” Her eyes were raised expectantly.
“Well… ” I hesitated, wanting to choose my words wisely. I knew I could lie and spare Jill from the contrasting ‘normal’ I’d grown up with, but I trusted her. And as much as I didn’t want her pity, she needed to know the real me. The good and the bad. “I didn’t really ever shop for clothes. When I outgrew what I had, we usually visited Goodwill or a mission resale store. Sometimes, especially in winter, I’d take clothes and jackets from the ‘Lost and Found’ at school—but I promise, I always returned them. Always.”
Jill and I had been combing through racks of clothes when she asked the question, but she’d stopped at some point. When I looked up, she was watching me, tears streaming down her face. Clearing her throat, she wiped the tears from her cheeks and continued her search for the perfect denim jacket.
“Well,” she said with false bravado, “then we have a lot of catching up to do, don’t we?”
I walked out to the parking lot eons later, wondering where I was going to put everything we’d purchased. I had jeans, shirts, sweaters, skirts, dresses, leggings, at least seven pairs of shoes and boots, belts, hair bands, and even bras and underwear. Then we stopped at a store completely devoted to beauty supplies. It had every kind of makeup known to man. She ended up finding a saleslady with my same dark skin tone, who guided us up and down each and every relevant aisle, pointing out what would look best on me.
But the last stop was the most shocking. Jill walked me into Cingular Wireless and bought me a brand-new Motorola cell phone.
“Jill! What are you, my fairy foster-mother?” She laughed and squeezed my hand. It was true, though. All day, I’d felt like Cinderella, and I couldn’t help but wonder if the clock would strike midnight and all these wonderful things happening to me would disappear.
“Well, Rebecca, I’m definitely not magical. I can’t turn pumpkins into coaches or rags into grand ball gowns. But one thing I can do is give you a chance at the kind of life all children deserve.”
Try as I might, I could not stop the tears that sprung from my eyes at her words. “I just don’t know how I’ll ever repay you.”
“This.” She placed her hands on either side of my face, wiping my face with her thumbs. “The fact that I can do something to eliminate even a little of what must be immeasurable stress in your life is all the payment I need.”
Chapter 14
Jase
AS SOON AS THE GIRLS left for their shopping extravaganza, Bennett and I called my mom. He put her on speakerphone and we peppered her with questions. She was driving home, but her car phone had a speaker, so she was happy to talk while she drove.
“What did Social Services have to say about Becky?” Bennett asked. I know he’d purposely waited to talk to my mom until Jill and Becky were gone. It was apparent both Jill and Becky were emotionally invested, and Bennett wanted to shield them from any possible road bumps.
“Well, first of all, there is no record of her being in the system. There is also no record of her mother being dead. Regardless of what the records reflect, the girl is still considered homeless. She’s being assigned a caseworker as we speak, and as soon as I’m home, we’ll all meet at your house to sort out the details.”
“Won’t she need temporary refuge until she’s assigned to a foster family?” I was terrified she’d be taken somewhere and I wouldn’t be able to see her anymore.
“Well, yes. I’ve volunteered to take her in so we can keep her out of the group home. But from what SS is telling me, the Hanson’s home would be a more ideal placement, since she will, more than likely, be placed in their long-term, temporary care.”
The contented smile on Bennett’s face matched my own at that last bit of news. I halfway expected him to start handing out ‘It’s a girl’ cigars. “Marian, I can’t thank you enough for your help. We’ll see you in a few hours. Please let us know if we need to do anything to prepare for the meeting.” His gentle tone didn’t match the overwhelmed look in his eyes. He played the part of the new father with extreme accuracy, like he’d been a dad for years.
“You’re more than welcome, Ben. It’s a great thing you’re doing for this child. I can’t wait to meet her. I’ll see you soon. Bye, Bennett, Jase.”
Sinking back into our chairs, we both let out breaths we’d been holding for who knows how long. “Are you ready for this?”
Bennett nodded. “I’ve never been less ready for anything in my life. But I’ll tell you something else. I can’t wait!”
Chapter 15
Becky
JILL AND I PULLED INTO their driveway a little before dark, exhausted but happy. Immediately upon entering the house, Mr. Hanson and Jase filled us in on the day’s happenings. Since Jase’s mom and my newly assigned caseworker were expected within the hour, Jill rushed me upstairs to shower and change.
“The boys chose this room for you.” She opened the door with a flourish. “Will this be okay, you think?” Jill’s nerves were evident in her voice, which made me giggle until I looked around. It was the most elegant room I’d ever been in. And it smelled like clean laundry. I loved that scent.
“I’ve never had a room of my own. I’ve never had a bed that wasn’t just a mattress on the floor. This is way more than okay.”
I walked around the room, lightly touching the smooth, clean surf
aces. The polished hardwood floors matched the cherry wood antique furnishings, and the white down comforter and pillows were neutral enough I could easily add my own personality to the space.
“This,” I pointed at the luxurious bed, “looks like heaven to me.” Then I hugged her, surprising even myself. I’d never been a fan of physical contact, since the only kind I’d ever had was unwanted. But there weren’t words to express how grateful I was for everything she’d done for me.
“I don’t know how to thank y’all,” I said, my words muffled by our embrace.
“You don’t have to thank us for giving you a life you deserve. Now,” she pulled back, wiping tears from her cheeks, “go get cleaned up. We’ve got an important meeting in just a few minutes.” With that, she patted me on the back and then she walked out, leaving the door cracked just a tad.
My heart swelled. It was apparent Jase had warned her of my quirks.
When I came back into the room after my shower, everything we’d purchased was hanging neatly in the closet and the shoes were lined up on the floor below my new wardrobe. On the bed, I saw a hot pink throw pillow with the letter B embroidered on it. I know that hadn’t been there before and I wondered when Jill had managed to buy it without my knowing.
On the bench at the foot of the bed, Jill had laid out a gauzy, white peasant shirt and a cute denim skirt from the clothes we’d purchased. I added a beaded necklace and knee-high riding boots to complete the ensemble. And for the first time in my life, I had a bra that fit well and matched my skin tone. That alone was enough to put me on top of the world.
All the makeup and hair accessories we’d purchased were lined up on the antique vanity by the bed, so I sat on the padded stool and added some blush to my cheeks, a touch of mascara, and a little lip gloss. It made a world of difference, both in my appearance and my attitude. After adding a braided leather hair band, I felt pretty for the first time in a long time.
It was showtime.
What I wanted to do was barrel down the stairs shouting, “Look at me! I’m so pretty!” But I didn’t. Instead, I stopped at the top to take a few deep breaths, inadvertently hearing the stage-whispered conversation happening below.
“I will not allow that child to be taken to a group home. Not when she has a perfectly fine place right here with us.”
They hadn’t been in the house a minute before Mr. Hanson was fighting for me.
“Ben, I told you, that’s not going to happen.” It was a voice I didn’t recognize, but I assumed it was Jase’s mother. The woman speaking had the authoritative, intimidating tone befitting an attorney.
“Marian, I’m sorry. It’s just that… I know this is going to sound strange, but in my heart, she’s already ours.”
I’d heard all I needed to hear.
I started down the stairs, hoping to win the favor of these strangers who held my life in their hands.
Chapter 16
Jase
THE CONVERSATION CAME TO a halt as Becky descended the stairs. I was grateful all eyes were on her because I’m pretty sure my jaw hit the floor. She was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen in my life, and it took every bit of self-restraint I had not to go to her and pull her into my arms.
“Hi, I’m Becky. It’s nice to meet you.” My mother and I had the same bright red hair and pale skin, so it was easy to distinguish which one belonged to me from the two ladies who sat in upholstered chairs in the Hanson’s living room. But she’d also spoken at an NHS meeting about a year back, so Becky probably remembered her from that. She walked right up to my mother and stuck her hand out, head held high. Mom was going to love her for that alone.
“Well, hello, young lady. It’s so lovely to meet you. I’m Marian Pearson, and this is Michelle Charles, your caseworker.” Becky shook the hands of both ladies before walking over to sit between Jill and Bennett on the couch. I stood in the background and watched as Jill discreetly reached down to grab Becky’s hand in silent support.
Michelle and my mother did most of the talking, but when they had a question, Jill or Bennett spoke up. My mom explained how Becky had to be legally classified as a ward of the state before she could be placed in foster care. I saw Bec’s back stiffen when that was said.
“But, Becky, don’t worry,” my mother reassured her. “We’ve already taken care of that, so you’re eligible to be placed in foster care immediately.”
All heads turned to look my direction as I blew out a relieved breath. I was doing a terrible job at hiding my own interest in all this.
Michelle spoke next. “Becky, do you have any living relatives?” She shook her head. “Well,” she sighed, “that makes all of this much easier. Since you are a minor child, I will be your advocate, making decisions concerning your well-being on behalf of the state. And, in my opinion, I believe it’s in your best interest to be placed in the care of Bennett and Jill Hanson—”
Collective sighs could be heard all around, and Jill gave a little squeak as she threw her arms around Becky’s shoulders.
“That is, until such time as the minor is adopted or turns eighteen. If, at any time, the arrangement becomes disagreeable to either party, new arrangements can be made. Does everyone directly involved with this case agree with this determination?”
Everyone nodded as they stood, shook hands, and patted each other on the backs. The Hansons and my mother set up a meeting for first thing Monday morning to make everything official, but as of now, Becky would be residing next door where she would be safe, warm, well-fed, and most importantly, loved.
My mom and I left a few minutes later. Once we were home, she turned on me with a pretty interesting line of questioning.
“How did all this come about, Jase? I’ve never even heard you mention this girl, and now you’re lobbying to find her a home?” Her tone was borderline accusatory. Knowing my mom, she’d figure out the truth eventually, so I went with honesty.
“I’ve known her for a few years. We’ve had lots of classes together. I found her camping in our shed a few nights ago, so I brought her inside. She was freezing and looked hungry, so I fed her, let her shower, and gave her some clean clothes.”
She watched me with wide, unbelieving eyes and her mouth hung open a little.
“Look, she begged me not to call the police, terrified they’d take her to a group home or the shelter. And she’s so smart, Mom. She wasn’t a threat. She’s just so broken, and I… ” Tears filled my eyes at the mere thought of her being all alone, having to fight for her next meal, and not knowing where she’d sleep from night to night.
My mom pulled me into her arms as I let go of the emotions I’d been hiding from Becky for days. “Jase, it’s okay. You did good, baby. You did good, and I’m so proud of the man you’ve become,” she whispered in my ear as she rubbed my back like she had when I was a child.
Then, pulling back, she held me at arm’s length and asked, “I just have to know, though, is there anything going on between you two? I saw the way you looked at her. Is there anything I need to be concerned about?”
I felt that a partial truth would have to work in this case. “No, Mom, nothing happened between us. Nothing at all. She is just my friend and nothing more.”
I knew very well what I felt for Becky went way beyond friendship. I just had to decide what, if anything, I was going to do about it.
Becky crawled into her new, oversized, four-poster bed with the fluffy white comforter and all the pillows. She turned off the nightlight and fell asleep with a smile on her face and peace in her heart.
I could even smell her and feel her hair on my chest. Suddenly, instead of Becky in her bed all alone, I was in bed with her, in her beautiful new room. She was snuggled close to me, and my arms were wrapped around her as I stroked her face.
I’m not sure if noise or movement ruined my dream and pulled me out of my deep sleep, but my eyes popped open, and I was staring at the ceiling of my bedroom. I felt sweat in my hair and my heart beating at an abnormal rate�
� but as I tried to sit up, I found myself weighed down. Becky was cuddled in my arms, fast asleep. Her arm was draped over my chest, and both her legs were intertwined with mine.
“Becky.” I shook her, and she woke with a start, tilting her head upward to meet my eyes. “What are you doing here?” My whispers seemed incredibly loud in the silent darkness of my room.
“I… ” She looked away, trying to untangle her body from mine. “I was scared, and I knew that being with you I wouldn’t be.”
I held on tighter to her, halting her movements as I leaned over to grab my alarm clock. I set the alarm to go off at 5:30. “When that goes off, you go home. Okay?”
She smiled at me and snuggled in tighter, pulling the covers as high as they would go. Feeling her hot breath on my chest was almost my undoing.
“How’d you get in here, anyway?”
“You have a key under the mat.”
How she knew that, I had no idea, but I didn’t honestly care. I seemed to always get my best sleep when Becky was with me, too.
I didn’t wake up until the sun was high in the sky and the light flooding in through the blinds sent me into full panic mode. I reached out to shake Becky awake, but what I now considered her side of the bed was empty and cold. She was gone and had been for some time.
Lucky for me, her fragrance lingered.
Chapter 17
Becky
THE FOSTER PLACEMENT PROCESS didn’t take long at all, and before I knew it—like falling out of a dream and into the same reality—I had the family I’d always wished for. My new normal included two loving parents, a perfect home, and an even more perfect bedroom. I had warm clothes for my body and warm food for my belly. Also, I’d been taken in by the neighborhood kids, all boys, and made to feel like one of the gang. Though the bond between Jase, Casey, and myself was the strongest.