by C. E. Wilson
“So Celia must have told her dad… oh geezus,” he moans. “It was me, wasn’t it? I told Celia and then she told her dad and he… oh geezus!” he says. “What Paulson did to you... that’s my fault!”
“It’s not a big—”
“Don’t say it’s not a big deal! You have a black eye because of my stupid lie! Dammit to High and Mighty!” He cradles his face in his hands and I tilt my head curiously to watch him. He can’t feel that bad about what happened? When his face is covered, my hand acts on its own, wanting to touch his silvery hair. He’s pissed at himself. He’s never cursed around me. “And the cuffs…” he grumbles into his hands, “…Celia probably told Paulson you’re a thief. I can’t… ugh. Why can’t I do this right?”
“R-Reese,” I say. My throat is dry from watching this beautiful being punish himself over the likes of me. He doesn’t need to care so much. My hand’s still hovering close to his hair, but I flinch back as he lifts his head away to look at me. His face is redder than ever. “You don’t… I mean—”
“Tell me,” he interrupts. “Is this all because of what I said about the wallet?” His eyes sear into mine and though I don’t say the words, I give a short nod that confirms his worries. “I’m… I’m sorry, Eleven,” he mutters. “I wasn’t thinking.”
“It’s okay—”
“It’s not,” he says sharply. “It’s not okay. You… you don’t deserve this.” He runs a slender hand through his hair. “I’m trying to help you and I’m only making your life worse.”
“You still haven’t said why you’re trying to help me.”
“I shouldn’t have to tell you,” he says quietly. “I wish you would remember.”
“Remember?” I repeat. “Remember what?”
“I… we… it’s because I think you’re beautiful, okay?” he blurts out. When I look at him, I can’t stop my eyes from widening.
Beautiful? Me? My lips part. “D-Did you… did you say I’m—”
“I can’t,” he says, standing up quickly and backing away. I scramble to my feet, but he’s already opened the door and started to leave.
“Wait!” I cry out. “Where are you going?”
“I’m… I’m trying not to… geezus.” He takes a step out of the doorway so I can’t reach for him. “I said it, okay? It doesn’t mean anything. Please don’t think I meant anything by it.”
“But you said—”
“Forget about it!” he shouts, slamming the door behind him.
I jump at the sound and hear Reese retreat upstairs and shut the basement door. And then I hear his footsteps leaving the house completely. A car speeds away and I’m still standing there in shock. What happened? One minute he’s feeding me, the next he’s saying I’m beautiful, and then… then he freaks out and leaves? I take in a trembling sigh and try to smooth some of the hairs away from my face.
Even with a black eye and a swollen face… he says he’s not frightened of me. He feeds me… and then he’s gone.
And then it hits me like a beating from Shawn.
He’s ashamed to find me attractive.
I turn around, look down at the other piece of pizza on the bed, and grab it. I rip the greasy dough to pieces and flush it down the toilet. I can’t look at it. The slice reminds me too much of what happened. Feeling enraged, I walk back to the bed and pull out all the pieces of chocolate I’ve stored in there and flush them down the toilet too. I don’t want to think about the smell of cocoa or the sweet sound of his voice in my ears.
All I can think about is his face when he called me beautiful.
He looked upset by his admission.
He didn’t mind sharing because he wasn’t frightened, but being attracted to me was quite another thing. He was ashamed of how he felt towards me.
I collapse back in bed and bury my head in the pillow, allowing an early sleep to take me away from thoughts of his face. I can’t think about him. I have to think about what to do since Reese probably won’t want to see me anymore.
Would I have to spend more time with Shawn?
Would Celia start seeing me?
Would Griff come to work with me?
The possibilities make me tremble and I pinch my eyes completely shut so I won’t think about them. I want to be mad with Reese, but despite this, I think about him as sleep comes. I want him to say I’m beautiful without being ashamed. I want him take me away from…
Fumbling at the doorknob wakes me up. I’m not sure how much time has passed, but I sit up in bed expecting to see Shawn or Reese. I rub my eyes. What time is it? I want to ask who’s at the door but they don’t say a thing and the knob continues to jangle around. Usually Reese walks in… Shawn leaves him a key and, of course, Shawn has his own. So why…
I freeze up when the door opens and two figures fill the doorway in the shadows. The room is dark enough that I can barely see their faces, but I know the shapes.
A man shorter than Reese, but thicker. An even smaller shape with light blue hair. I swallow.
“It was sleeping,” a male voice says. I recognize the voice immediately and sit up straighter.
“That’s all it has to do,” the other voice says. This one is sharp and sends a shudder down my spine. I’m used to hearing the voice complaining and whining, but this time the voice sounds determined and annoyed. “That’s all it ever has to do. Sleep and play around with my boyfriend.”
“Hey, I thought you said—”
“You know what I mean,” the shrill voice snaps back. “Shut up and let’s do this before my dad comes home.”
A light flickers on.
Chapter Nine
As my eyes adjust to the new light in the room, I realize my greatest fear has come true. The voices belong to Celia and Griff. The two stand on the far side of the room and I can feel the hatred and disgust radiating off both of them as they advance towards my bed. I’m helpless.
“You must think you’re pretty special trying to bite me,” Griff says gruffly. “My mom was pissed when I had to miss school for a doctor’s appointment. And I hate needles.”
“No one cares about what a pussy you are,” Celia grumbles. “Let’s do this before my dad gets back.”
“You think your dad’s going to do anything to me?” Griff asks, shooting a strange expression my way. I don’t like to look at him. His eyes are a vibrant hue of red and his hair is dark brown with white streaks. He’s wearing almost the same outfit I usually see Reese in, but Griff’s uniform looks different on him. Where fabric hangs off Reese, it clings to Griff’s thicker shape. His boots are heavy under the cuff of his pants. I can almost imagine how they’ll feel if he’s pissed off. “Your dad isn’t going to do jack if he knows what’s good for him,” Griff continues as I crawl further back on the bed. I think about screaming, but my mind warns to be careful. Something flashes in Celia’s hand. “It’s bad enough I helped move the thing. My mom would fire your dad in a heartbeat if that thing tries to touch me. I’ll kill—”
“Will you lower your voice?” Celia hisses. “High and Mighty, Griff. Get a hold of yourself. It’s a Potential. We’ll ruin it enough so my dad doesn’t see the point of keeping it.”
“I know what to do,” Griff mutters, advancing further. My lips tremble and I prepare to scream, but he lunges forward and covers my mouth. “Now, now,” he says in a singsong voice. “We can’t have you making noise.” With his free hand, he loosens his tie and pulls it tightly around my mouth. My screams are weak and muffled, but I won’t give in easily. “Shock it!” he grunts.
As I’m about to let another cry out, I feel the sharp bite of the collar as Celia hits the button on the controller. The pain is unbearable and because of Griff’s tie, I can’t scream the way I want, and instead crumble.
“Again,” Griff says, stepping away and reaching for the controller. “This will teach it to try to bite me.”
“Griff, I don’t… I don’t think I can—”
“Dammit, Celia. Who’s the pussy now?”
&n
bsp; “I didn’t know it was so bad—”
“Just do it!”
The pain sears through my body again.
And again.
My eyes water uncontrollably as I writhe from the pain and the wicked smile on Griff’s features. Celia’s torn, but when Griff looks down at her, she shuffles and smiles slightly.
“Betcha Reese wouldn’t have the balls to do this,” Griff says. “He’s too much of a flamer to hurt what he used to be.”
“Reese’s a Beauty. I don’t care what he used to be,” Celia says in his defense. I’m shocked she’s defending him. She doesn’t care that he used to be like me. I don’t know why, but the thought calms me slightly despite the ringing sound and Griff’s cruel red eyes.
“Whatever,” Griff says, obviously not bothered. “What now?”
“I… I don’t know,” Celia says as she eyes me. I can’t tell what feeling is hidden behind her bright green eyes, but she looks conflicted as our faces meet. “That’s enough—”
“Enough?” Griff asks. “A few shocks are enough for you? I thought you were into this, Celia. You were the one who wanted to teach it a lesson.”
“I know, but—”
“You were the one who said Reese’s being too nice to it.”
“I did and—”
“So do something,” he says, pushing her forward and closer to me. “Look, it ain’t gonna do anything. It’s more scared of your dad than it is of us. Do what you want to it.”
“What if Reese figures out we did—”
“So what if he does?” Griff grunts. “You’re with me now.”
“I’m not with you,” Celia says with a certain amount of dignity. “I want Reese to pay attention to me. I don’t want him thinking about it so much! That’s all Reese and Dad care about! It’s this stupid thing!” She turns with an angry expression and I can’t help but shrink back. “Why do you have to take up so much of their time? They have better things to do than deal with you.”
My eyes drift over to Griff, who’s watching closely. The controller’s in his hands. He’s ready to shock me at any time if I try to do anything to Celia. His smile widens and I’m nearly blinded by a perfect set of straight, white teeth.
“If you’re mad at it, show it you’re mad,” Griff says in a challenging tone. “Show the beast who’s boss. Show it that you don’t like it spending too much time with your dad. And Reese.”
Reese.
Both of our eyes change when Griff says his name. Celia doesn’t notice it, but Griff’s quick to pounce on my reaction. He lets out a low whistle.
“Would you look at that,” he says.
Celia turns around to look at him. “What?”
“I think you’ve got a little competition,” Griff says. “Your dad’s little toy has a thing for Reese.”
She whips her head back around to look at me, blue hair flopping across her face. I can see the pinkness rise up in her cheeks. “W-what? What are you talking about?”
“I think it’s got a crush,” Griff says. “How about it, beast?” he snaps at me. “You think I didn’t notice your face? You’ve got a thing for Reese, don’t you?” When I don’t answer, he holds up the controller so I can see his thumb hovering over the button. “Don’t you?”
“Don’t shock it again,” Celia mutters pathetically.
“Shut up and answer me, bitch. You gotta thing for Reese? You think he’s the same as you?”
When I don’t answer, I lower my head and the pain comes without surprise. I grit my teeth and try to take it, but I’m growing weaker. I can’t take many more of the shocks.
Griff shocks me, anyway. I can barely control my breathing through his tie and the smell is making me sick.
“What are you gonna do about it, huh?” Griff asks Celia. “The thing’s got a thing for your man.” He laughs, walks up to Celia, and rests his hands on both of her shoulders. “What do you think they’re doing down here when you’re not home?” he whispers in her ear loud enough for me to hear. I want to defend myself, but I can’t take another shock. I’ll pass out and I don’t want to be unconscious in their presence.
“Reese… he wouldn’t…” Celia says back in a broken voice. I can hear the doubt in her voice.
“Why?” Griff purrs as he runs a finger across her collarbone. “Because he used to be like it? You think his former ugliness makes him noble?”
“I… I don’t want to think about it.”
“But you might have to,” Griff says. “Look at it…” He trails off for effect and Celia’s green eyes find mine and we look at each other. I want her to understand Reese never betrayed her. He kept his distance until I forced it upon him. “I bet Reese comes down here every day to…”
“Don’t say it!” Celia squeals. “He wouldn’t.”
“I bet he would! You’re a fool to think otherwise.” He takes his hands off her shoulders and runs them down her arms all the way to her hands. I finally get a good look at what she’s holding.
A blade. Only a small kitchen knife but it’s a weapon nonetheless. I break out into a cold sweat, breathing heavily.
“You see?” Griff asks. “See the fear in its eyes? That’s what you want, Celia. That’s the only way to get these beasts to respect you. It’ll never stop making screw-me eyes at your boyfriend unless you put a stop to it. Show it,” he says, pushing her gently forward. “Show it who’s boss. Reese isn’t the boss of it. Your dad isn’t the boss of it, either. It’s you, Celia. You’re the boss. Act like it.”
“Act like it,” she repeats to herself, taking the first step toward me. “Act like it…” She stops in front of the bed, holds the knife out, and points it towards me. I can’t say a word, but I plead with my eyes. I don’t want to be cut. Ruining the skin is one of the worst punishments for a Potential. I don’t always heal. I’ll scab. I’ll scar. I squirm around on the bed, but Griff urges her on with a warning tone.
“It needs some real training,” he says to her. “Do it…”
“I don’t want to,” Celia says in a squeamish voice. “What if Dad finds out—”
“Oh, to hell with this! I’ll do it myself,” Griff says, taking the knife from her and dragging it across my exposed leg. I cry out from under the tie as the blade pierces my skin. Griff’s eyes widen in shock when a trail of blood spills from the cut and Celia stumbles away. My eyes fog over as Griff backs away with her, shaking his head. “That… that’s a lot of blood.” The blade tumbles from his fingers. “Holy shit… shit…”
“What did you think was going to happen?” Celia hisses at him.
“It’s… it’s getting on the floor,” he croaks, his face suddenly very pale. “I… I don’t get it! I didn’t even cut her that bad! She’s… she must be faking it.”
“Faking blood?” Celia whisper hisses.
“Faking it somehow! I swear I didn’t even cut her that deep.”
“You don’t know anything about cutting!” Celia sounds incredulous as her vibrant green eyes drift over to me. “What the hell were you thinking?”
“I just wanted to show it a lesson,” he blurts out as he backs away. “I didn’t think she’d bleed so much on purpose!”
“That doesn’t even make sense!”
I clutch the wound on my leg to staunch the bleeding when suddenly Griff looks up as though he’s just heard a loud commotion upstairs. But there’s silence.
“I should get outta here before I get in trouble. Your dad—”
“Are you kidding?” Celia snaps. “He’s at the hospital—”
“No way. I swear I heard something,” Griff says, stumbling back out of the room. “I bet… I bet this bitch called him! I bet he’s here! I bet he’s home and he’s gonna see what I did and…”
“I’m sure if he’s home that he’s sleeping—”
“My mom was going to call him in to work,” he growls back. “Geezus,” he grumbles. “I can’t… I can’t do this… I’ve gotta get out of here.” He fidgets nervously and Celia pushes him aw
ay from the door.
“Now who’s the pussy?”
“Shut the hell up! What’s the easiest way to get out of here? I can’t let your dad see me!”
“Go through the basement window before you piss yourself,” she hisses. “I’ll take care of it.”
“And you’ll clean it up? You won’t tell your dad?”
“Let me deal with it!” she hisses a second time. “Go!”
“What’ll you tell Paulson?” he asks as Celia turns off the light and shuts the door. I’m back in the dark and frozen with shock. Dried blood cracks on my hand as I clutch my leg. I can still make out their voices, though.
“Go out through the window,” Celia says. “If he asks, I’ll say someone one broke in.”
“No one’s gonna break in here! This is a gated community—”
“Just go!”
I hear a rickety window creak open and Griff’s voice fades. They’re gone. I hold up my hand as I fall back on the bed and notice how red it is. The cut on my thigh felt long but shallow. It was bleeding a lot, though. Not wanting to ruin the bed sheets, I crawl out from the bed, wobble to the corner, and curl up in a ball. I can’t… I can’t think.
I’m cold.
I want to curl up in my blankets like a child, but I’m too proud to reach for them.
I will not bloody what may be my only blanket.
I hear Celia’s light steps scramble up the stairs… and then another flight of stairs before a door slams. She’s left me. She’s left me here to bleed out. I lick my lips and finally let the tears come. Rocking back and forth, I try to stay awake, but I’m still too much in shock to move.
I don’t know how much time has gone by when I hear noises. Too tired to move, I try to adjust my ears to the sound as someone enters the basement. The door doesn’t open, which could only mean someone’s come through the window. Steps trample the carpet, padding softly over the bare surface. I pull myself into a tighter ball.
Griff’s coming back.
He’s decided to prove that he’s not afraid of blood, that he’s a real man.
He doesn’t want Celia to get her hands dirty.