He shrugged. He may have said something like that, but it wasn’t what he meant. “I just can’t talk about this right now.”
Brandon walked upstairs to get himself a soda. Jade was always holding him back. None of the other DJs that he knew would just do some old man’s boring birthday. That was ridiculous. And of course her mom would use him for all of her events – why wouldn’t she? Who else would come out to the stupid island? Didn’t she want him to succeed? Or was she as against him as Jade was?
He spent the rest of the ferry ride listening to music on his phone. When it was time to get off, Jade found him and outstretched a hand.
“Brandon honey – I’m really sorry. Can we please just try and have a nice time?”
He sighed. “I guess. But I’m not going hiking with you guys. My back hurts.”
“Are you sure? I don’t want to leave you behind.”
Nothing new there! She was always leaving him behind. He was out there busting his tail to make a name for himself, and she was doing what? Working her easy job at the bank. Hanging out with her mom and eating bonbons. Typical Jade – she’d never understand how hard he worked.
“It’s fine.”
As soon as they got to Margie’s house, Morgan started annoying him. She was way too excited to go on this hike and already had a bag packed with snacks.
“Are you sure you don’t want to come? I packed enough snacks for three people. And I packed a bottle of wine, to make it fancy!”
Brandon nodded. “I’m sure, you girls have fun. I’m gonna sit here and relax for a bit.”
“Aw,” Jade said, delicately trying to hold his hand. “I was hoping I could spend more time with you.”
“Well maybe you should’ve thought of that before deciding to go on this hike without me,” he said in a low voice. “It’s fine. I’ll just hang out in one of the spare rooms until your mom gets home.”
“No, really, I’ll stay here with you…”
He sighed. Jade was being clingy again. He hated when she was like this – she would follow him around and keep whining until he made her feel better.
“No really, it’s fine. I just need to take a break. I’ll see you later.”
To his relief, she did what he told her to do and left for the hike with Morgan. It was actually better this way – he had a couple of podcasts that he hadn’t had time to listen to.
He was able to listen to his first podcast in peace, but about twenty minutes into the second one, the front door opened. He didn’t feel like talking to Margie, so he quickly got up and closed the bedroom door. He could pretend like he was sleeping so that he didn’t have to spend any unnecessary time talking to his mother-in-law.
He settled himself back on the bed. This new mattress was pretty comfortable – at least maybe he’d get a good night of sleep. He put his headphones back on but it was no use – he could hear Margie droning on in the kitchen. Who was she even talking to?
He got up, ready to tell her to keep it down, when something caught his ear.
“They could come home any minute, and I don’t want them to hear what I’m about to tell you.”
Brandon quietly sat down on the ground near the door. Now this could be something interesting.
Margie continued. “No, no, I definitely have time to talk. I’m just saying – I probably have to make it quick. But I’m so glad that you called Sandy, I’ve really missed you.”
It was quiet for a moment – Margie appeared to be listening to something that her sister Sandy was saying. He leaned in closer to the door to make sure that he didn’t miss anything.
“Oh yeah, I’m sure that Mike’s fine. You know how he is.” Another pause. “I know, I couldn’t believe he sold it to me either! It was a total surprise. You have to visit. Okay, right, let me tell you what’s going on…”
Brandon made sure he was entirely still so he wouldn’t make any noise. Margie took a deep breath before speaking again. “This all started over twenty years ago…”
The story went on for over ten minutes. Brandon rolled his eyes – Margie was so annoying when she had something to say – she never just got to the point. Sometimes Margie and Jade talked back and forth like a pair of birds.
But she was talking so quickly – he’d never even heard her talk so fast before. At first, he wasn’t exactly sure what she was talking about. The dead woman showed up at her door a long time ago?
Who cares? But then it got good – so good that Brandon couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Apparently, Margie’s hospitality to that annoying girl Morgan wasn’t just her being nice. Morgan was Jeff’s kid! And Margie hadn’t told anybody. Not even Morgan knew.
Margie was hemming and hawing over what to do when she said, “Oh shoot, I have to go Sandy. Jade is calling me!”
It gave Brandon a chance to quietly get back on the bed so he could pretend like he was sleeping. He stretched out and mulled over what he’d just heard.
First of all, this was unbelievable. The whole thing was ridiculous. Did Morgan think she could just waltz in here and get an inheritance from Jeff? Jeff was a really wealthy guy – he was bound to leave his money to his kids.
Sure, he had a bunch of girlfriends, but he never made the mistake of marrying one of them again. He learned that lesson in the divorce when he had to pay alimony to Margie.
Hopefully when he died, he would leave his money to his kids. Brandon didn’t think that Tiffany even needed the money – she was a hotshot in Chicago. And what was Connor going to do with money? That dude would be happy living in a tent in the woods.
Really, Jade and Brandon needed it the most. They were the ones that needed to buy a house. They were the ones that were going to have to take care of Margie in her old age, obviously, since she moved herself up here.
Brandon laid on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. He could feel his face growing hot. He was so angry about the situation. If this Morgan girl made a big fuss about Jeff being her dad, who knows what would happen? Maybe she would get a bunch of his money.
And why was Margie trying to figure out how to talk to Jeff about it? She said he hadn’t called her back, even though she called him three times. Couldn’t she take the hint?
Was she going to shame him into accepting this girl as his daughter? Was she really naïve enough to think that Jeff didn’t know, that it was some big mistake? Obviously Jeff knew. Obviously he told Kelly that he wouldn’t give her a dime all those years ago. That’s what Brandon would’ve done in that situation. Sometimes mistakes happen, but you don’t have to ruin your entire life over them.
The front door opened and Brandon could hear Morgan and Jade’s voices. Shoot – he had to join them soon. He had to act natural around them; nobody could know what was going on or what he knew. Not until he had a plan of what to do with this information.
It only took a few minutes before Jade came looking for him.
“There you are! Are you feeling okay?”
He sat up, rubbing his eyes. “Oh wow, I must’ve fallen asleep. Yeah, I feel a lot better.”
Margie appeared in the doorway. “Oh my goodness! I didn’t even know that you were here Brandon.”
He rubbed his eyes again with the palms of his hands. He needed to make a show of it. “Yeah, so sorry about that. I didn’t even hear any of you guys come home. I was out like a light. Just been working so much recently.”
“He has been,” said Jade, rubbing his shoulder.
He put a hand on top of hers. “But I feel better now, thanks honey.”
“Well, I’m gonna go and make dinner. You kids just relax until then. I hope I didn’t wake you up,” said Margie.
She looked nervous. Good. She should be.
“No, not at all, I was so tired I just passed out.”
Margie nodded. “Oh, okay. Well – dinner will be ready soon.”
Brandon turned to his wife. “How was the hike? I hope Morgan didn’t drive you too crazy.”
Jade shushed him. “Not at a
ll. You should really give her a chance, she’s very nice.”
Darn. It seemed like making Jade one of his allies was going to be tough. She had a soft spot for the girl. Jade was like her mom – she was too nice. People manipulated her.
“Well,” he said in a low voice, “she gives me a bad feeling. I can’t put my finger on it.”
Jade frowned. “Just give her a chance, please? For me?”
He smiled. “Anything for you sweetheart.”
Chapter 17
The rest of Amanda’s visit went well. There was no more mention of Margie, and therefore, no further exchange of heated words. As planned, on Corinne’s birthday, Hank and Amanda took the boat out and visited all of their favorite places. They arranged a time and made a video call to Jacob, so he could join them in commemorating the day.
It was hard saying goodbye to Amanda when it was time for her to go back to London; she promised to visit again soon, and again reiterated her invitation for Hank to come to London.
“You don’t want your old man putting a damper on your style,” he said.
She rolled her eyes. “Dad, I have way too much style for that to be a problem.”
Hank laughed. He wasn’t really sure where Amanda got her smart mouth – it certainly wasn’t from him, and Corinne was as sweet natured as a person could be. Hank suspected that it came from his own mother, a firecracker who passed away before Amanda was even born.
Though Amanda’s lively spirit was difficult at times when she was a teenager, he still loved her for it. It reminded him so much of his mom, and he liked that she had some fight in her. She never let the world get her down.
Hank however was always a softy, and it seemed he’d been getting softer as the years went on. He could feel the tears coming to his eyes as he watched her get ready to drive to the ferry. “Are you sure you don’t want me to come with you? Maybe the ferry will be late and we can grab a coffee or something.”
Amanda shook her head. “No, it’s okay, I don’t want you to go through the trouble. How about if it’s late I give you a call?”
He nodded. “Alright sweetie. Well, have a safe trip.”
She wrapped her arms around his neck. “Don’t cry Dad, I’ll see you again soon, okay?”
“Okay, take care.”
He watched her drive away. A call to join her in Friday Harbor never came. After waiting a half hour, he took a deep breath and decided to put himself to use.
He was able to busy himself for a few hours with cleaning up the house, but then he was left to his own thoughts and the ever present silence. He pulled out his phone to see if maybe Margie had written him back – she hadn’t.
Hank felt bad that he had sent her such a cold message, but what was he supposed to do? Amanda was right. It was wrong for him to start a relationship with someone new. Maybe he and Margie could be friends someday, but while he still had such strong feelings for her, he needed to stay away.
He went back to work the next day and tried to invest his attention on whatever was handed to him. There was a complaint about illegal fireworks – he investigated that without resolution. Someone on the east side of the island put in a call about some deer that looked sick. Hank wasn’t able to find any. He ticketed a record sixteen people for not wearing their seatbelts. All in all – nothing exciting.
There was one piece of good news – apparently Frankie, Brock’s mechanic, got into some legal trouble after being caught selling parts from a stolen car. Hank decided it was time to make another visit to him and see if some pressure would loosen his lips.
Unfortunately, when he went to Frankie’s shop in Anacortes, it was locked up and dark. No one was inside. He’d have to find where Frankie was hiding; maybe the promise of some leniency would encourage him to be more cooperative about the Kelly Allen case.
The coming Saturday was the day that Hank dreaded most – he even considered picking up a shift just to have something to keep his mind busy, but decided against it. It was the anniversary of Corinne’s death. Before she passed away, she made them promise that they would only celebrate her birthday and not the day of her death; she died only ten days after her birthday.
“I told you that I would see forty-five,” she’d said.
He sat in the kitchen that morning, remembering how small she looked the day that she passed away. Eating was difficult by then, but Hank bought a birthday cake anyway. She made her best effort to take a few bites. And after that day, she declined so quickly – it really was like she’d held on just to make it to her birthday. And even though Hank knew that she was sick, and that logically, her time was coming, he wasn’t ready to let her go.
Hank stared into the black coffee in front of him. It was too bad that Amanda couldn’t stay just a bit longer so they could be together for this day. He had no appetite and didn’t want to mope around, so he decided to take the boat out and revisit all of Corinne’s favorite spots – the places where he’d spread her ashes.
He got started early because he couldn’t sleep – just after 7 AM. He decided to head north and loop around Stuart Island, then head south to get to Lime Kiln. Before he got there, though, he cut the boat’s engine just short of Posey Island.
It was a tiny little thing – only an acre – and it was a beautiful day. He was surprised to see that there was no one on the island; the island itself was a state park and almost always had visitors.
When the kids were little, they used to rent one of the campsites on Posey and do overnight trips with tent camping. It wasn’t that far from home, but the kids thought it was a great adventure. Corinne always packed everything so perfectly – she brought hot dogs and cheeseburgers to make over the fire; she brought all the S’mores supplies for the kids. She’d even sneak in a few beers for them to share once the kids went to bed; they’d just sit quietly, enjoying the crackles from the fire.
Hank wished that he had brought a kayak out with him so he could actually get on the island; there was no dock for the boat. He took a deep breath. He could feel the tears pricking at his eyes. He was never a crier – not until Corinne passed away. Now he felt weak, or softened maybe – like old worn leather.
At least no one was there – Hank was entirely by himself.
“I really miss you, you know,” he said out loud. “The kids miss you too. But they’re doing okay. They’re doing really well, actually. Better than me – which is good. I want them to be happy. Amanda has the great career that she’s always dreamed of in London. And Jacob – well, Jacob applied to every tech company in Australia just to see who would take him. He loves it there. You would’ve loved it, too. The beaches are right up your alley. I think he might even have a girlfriend that he’s not telling me about.” Hank laughed, shaking his head.
He sat for a moment, feeling the soft rock of the boat in the waves.
“To tell you the truth, I still haven’t really figured out how to live without you. I go to work, I do things around the house. I finally painted that door you hated.” He laughed again. “Everything else looks the same, the weather is the same, the tourists follow the same patterns…but somehow, everything is so different without you. It’s like I’m living on a different planet now where everything looks right, but nothing feels right. I just don’t…”
His voice broke. “I don’t know what to do. You always knew the answer, you always did the right thing. You were the one with the plan, not me. I feel like a toy with the batteries left on, just doing the things I’m supposed to do, but there’s no reason for it.”
Hank looked around to make sure that he was still alone. He was – there wasn’t a single kayaker, or boat of whale watchers, or even a single seagull. There was not another living soul who could hear him.
He cleared his throat. “I know that you told me you wanted me to find a way to be happy again. For me to find someone else. Unbelievably, I met someone, and – well, I don’t know how she feels about me, but once Amanda even caught a whiff of it, she was – well, she was herself. B
ut she’s right. You’ve only been gone for two years. It feels like a lifetime, but it’s only been two years. And we were together for twenty-seven years. I don’t even know a life without you. And it was wrong of me to even think of a life without you.”
Hank paused – he thought he heard something. No, it couldn’t be. Or…was it?
Then he heard it again: the breath of a killer whale. He looked up and saw a pod, their breaths misting in the sunshine. They were only a few hundred feet from his boat, and they were coming right for him. He double checked that his engine was off.
Within moments, an entire pod of orcas surrounded his boat. At first he thought they were just passing by, but they lingered – spy hopping, jumping, slapping their tails against the water. They were playing, they were celebrating. It was unbelievably loud, and Hank could hardly hear himself laughing over their ruckus. And he was in the middle of it all.
He’d seen this at a distance before, of course, but never so close. He ran to the side of the boat and peered over just as an orca swam beneath him. He could make out the white eye patch and even the orca’s small eye – he felt something stir in his soul. He’d never seen an orca that close up before – the little eye looked so wise. He had to remind himself to breathe. They were throwing a loud and boisterous party, and he was smack dab in the middle of it.
Everywhere he turned, the orcas were loudly playing. There was even a small baby who kept bobbing her head to take a peek at him. If Corinne were there, she’d be able to identify them based on their markings. But Hank had no idea who he was seeing – were they residents? Were they transients? Which pod were they from?
It didn’t matter, but Corinne would’ve known them down to the pod. She would’ve known who the matriarch was, how old she was, how old the baby was. All he could do was stand there, mouth hanging open, in awe. With each splash and water break, it felt like something on his chest was lifting. The heaviness that he brought with him onto the water dissipated. It was replaced with something he hadn’t felt in ages.
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