by Bella Jewel
“I don’t want to even think about it,” I whisper.
“I know you don’t want to, but I’m asking you to,” he encourages.
I take a deep breath. “Honestly, I don’t know why someone would want to distract us by setting it up like that. I think it could be to keep us away from Kaity so they can hurt her, but not even that makes a great deal of sense now that I’m thinking about it. So I guess I’m left with the one thought that I really don’t want, and that’s that all the things we’ve encountered, seem to lead back to me and my ordeal.”
“So we can assume what, then?”
My heart pounds, my palms get sweaty, and my body trembles, but I answer him with what I think we both know is the truth.
“That whoever has her, possibly has her because of what I endured and they’re trying to get back at me.”
He nods, and his eyes are soft, comforting, understanding. “Exactly. So it makes sense then that Chris could possibly be telling the truth?”
I nod. Hating to agree, but agreeing all the same.
“So where do we go from here?”
“We dig deeper,” I say softly, tired. “We look at it from a different angle.”
“And what angle is that?”
“From me.”
Me. It all comes back to me. But if I’m what will save my sister, if my story is what leads us to her, then I’ll do whatever it takes.
He nods. “Yeah. You. I know I turned that thought from your head earlier, because I honestly didn’t believe it could lead back to you, but I’m open to looking into it now, because I think you might be right.”
“Yeah,” I nod, tired.
“Do you feel any better?”
I do, because it helps me to process what happened with Chris and my emotions towards it. It helps me calm down and think clearer.
“I should shower,” I say softly, standing. “Thank you.”
My emotions are high. I just need to breathe.
“Always,” he murmurs.
I smile and disappear into the shower. I need a few more moments to think. It’s been a long, weary day. As the warm water washes over me, I think about Kaitlyn and wonder where she is. I think about the details Kenai and I just discussed. How all of Chris’s associates painted him as a total dirtbag, but too stupid to be a serious criminal. They all told the same story as Chris: that he and Kaity had broken up a few days before she went missing, and then he quickly got out of town too. Which means we are on the right path now.
And someone else has her. Like I thought.
A tear rolls down my cheek, followed by another, and then another. My knees give way and I collapse onto the shower floor, sobbing uncontrollably. I can’t stop it once it begins, and my sobs become wails as fear, panic, devastation, and loss cripple my body. Everything I’ve held in for so long, just comes out. Fear, guilt, weakness. It all just pours out. Like my body is just so damned tired of trying to keep it in.
I’m afraid. I’m lonely. I’m angry. I’m hurt. I’m paranoid. I’m so damned broken.
I don’t hear the door open, I don’t hear him step in, I just know a moment later strong arms wrap around me and pull me closer. My cheek slams against Kenai’s chest and he holds on to me as I let it all go. Days of pent-up fear, years of pent-up emotional turmoil. He wraps his arms tighter, squeezing me until I feel like I can’t breathe.
Exactly what I need and want.
“We’re going to find her,” he says, soaked from the warm water. “I swear it, Marlie. We’ll find her.”
“What if she’s … what if she’s already…”
“No,” he says firmly. “No. Look at me.”
He takes my chin in his hand and tilts my head back until I’m looking up at him. “Do not give up on her, do not give up on yourself, and do not give up on me.”
My eyes lock with his and heat explodes inside my chest. I can’t hold it back, I’m not even sure I want to. I reach up and swipe a piece of wet hair that’s fallen over his eyes. I push it back and then tangle my fingers into the thick locks. I’m naked. In his arms. And I don’t care. I bring my lips to his and press them in, hard.
“Marlie,” he groans, running his fingers up my back. “Not a good idea.”
I kiss him harder.
“Marlie,” he growls, pushing me back a little. “Fuck. I can’t. We can’t.”
Shame hits me right in the chest. I reel backwards, horror flashing across my features. Then I practically throw myself out of the shower. I’m horrified. He just rejected me. I put myself all in, and he rejected me.
“Marlie!” he calls after me as I wrap a towel around myself and rush out into the living room.
I start digging through my bag, looking for clothes, when he comes out with a towel wrapped around his waist. He has obviously discarded his wet clothes. Seeing him standing there, bare chest, dripping with water doesn’t help.
“Marlie,” he says carefully, moving closer.
“Don’t,” I growl, jerking out a pair of panties.
“I wasn’t rejecting you.”
I leap up, spinning around. “Weren’t you?” I say, trying to keep it together, even though my chest feels like it’s going to explode. “It’s okay, Kenai. I get it. No worries.”
“Christ,” he grits out. “That is not why I pushed you away.”
“Yeah,” I mumble, pulling out a top. “It’s okay, seriously.”
“Just listen to me.”
I ignore him, pulling out a pair of cotton shorts.
“Dammit, Marlie.”
I straighten and start walking towards what I’m assuming is the bedroom.
“Stop,” he orders.
“No,” I snap.
I make it to the door just as his arm curls around mine and he jerks me back into his chest. His entire body is pressed against my back, and I can feel his hot breath against my neck as he growls, “Listen. To. Me.”
“Eat a big fucking di—”
He spins me around so fast I nearly lose my footing, but he’s holding me close and cradling my head in his hand so I’m fully supported. “I am not rejecting you.”
“Pretty sure you are.”
He reaches down between us and takes my hand, jerking it towards him and rubbing it against his cock. “Does that feel like I don’t want to fuck you?”
I open my mouth, then close it again.
“Does it?” he hisses against my mouth. “Well?”
“No,” I breathe.
“I want to fuck you so damned bad I can’t think when I’m around you half the time. All I can do is imagine how good it would feel to have my cock sliding in and out of you. Hearing you scream my name. Feeling your pussy tightening around me.”
I squeeze my legs together and a little gasp escapes my lips.
“So stop,” he growls, coming closer, “running away from me.”
“You said no,” I say, staring at his lips.
“What I said was ‘we can’t.’ It’s not the same thing.”
“Why can’t we?”
His eyes flash. “Because you’re paying me to do a job, and so far, I’m not doing it well enough. If I become distracted by you, I won’t be able to do it to my full potential.”
“It’s one night, Kenai,” I say, reaching forward and curling my hand around his cock.
“Marlie…”
“Please. I haven’t been with anyone since … I … please?”
“Baby,” he growls.
Baby.
My skin tingles.
I squeeze him.
“Fuck it,” he hisses, reaching down and lifting my legs, hauling me up. I curl them around his hips and he slams my back against the wall. I moan and wrap my arms around his neck, pulling him in and capturing his lips with mine. He kisses me deep, hard, fast. Our tongues tangle, our lips smash together. We’re desperate. It’s radiating off both of us.
“Fuck,” he rasps. “I can’t wait, I don’t even want to.”
He reaches down between us and s
wipes his fingers through my pussy.
“So. Wet,” he growls.
“Kenai,” I whimper. “Please.”
He thrusts a finger inside me, then another. A scream rips from my throat as I throw my head back, loving the way I stretch around him.
“Yes,” he growls. “God, yes.”
“Fuck me,” I cry out, clutching his shoulders. “I need you to fuck me.”
He thrusts a few more times with his fingers, then he slides them out and takes his cock, pressing it to my entrance. Then he slams upwards, filling me. I stretch around him, a pleasurable burn radiating through my body. It feels incredible. My fingernails find his back and I drag them down as he pulls out and slams back in.
My back hits the wall with a thump, and my moans intensify.
“You feel so good,” I gasp as he fucks me with a ferocity I couldn’t have even imagined in my wildest dreams.
“So tight,” he moans, his fingers digging into my hips. “You’re perfect, Marlie.”
I whimper and tilt my hips, taking him deeper, needing him closer. “Kenai,” I gasp.
“Fuck. Say that again.”
“Kenai…”
He drives his cock deeper, harder, until my pussy is tightening around him and I can feel a raging orgasm building from the inside out. It starts right in my core, a warmth that quickly expands outwards until I feel like I can’t possibly take it anymore.
I come hard.
So hard I can’t hear my own screams.
Kenai bellows and then his body comes to a stop and I can feel every pulse as he finds his release, too.
I drop my head into his shoulder and exhale loudly, then I take a few moments to just breathe him in. He smells incredible. Whatever cologne he’s wearing drives me wild. That smell, mixed with his own unique scent, is enough to send any woman over the edge.
“That was incredible,” he murmurs, releasing me. I keep my face close to him, though. I need just a few more moments.
“God, it really was,” I whisper against his skin.
“Let me take a shower, again, and then we’ll get something to eat.”
I nod and step back on shaky legs.
His eyes find me and something passes between us.
Something incredible.
Something intense.
Something real.
* * *
“Tell me something about yourself,” I ask Kenai later as we lie side by side in the bed, our feet touching, my hand resting in his. “Something nobody knows.”
“I had a sister,” he says, stroking his thumb over my palm.
My heart beats harder. “Had?”
“She died.”
My stomach twists and my heart skips a beat. I couldn’t imagine. I couldn’t … not even for a second … imagine how that must have felt. The fear of losing my sister is enough to send me over the edge emotionally, but to actually lose her. My heart aches for him.
“I’m so sorry. Can I ask what happened?”
His thumb stops stroking, and he goes still for a moment. I’m worried I’ve asked too much, but a second later he starts talking. “She went missing. She was only fourteen. She was there one minute, gone the next. She was with me. She said she was going to the store. She never came home.”
My skin prickles and I roll to my side, looking at him. “I’m so sorry, Kenai.”
“I should have been watching her, but I was too busy hanging with some stupid girl. She went alone, some creep got hold of her and killed her.”
A flood of horror washes through my body. I know how that feels. I know what it’s like to be in the hands of a monster.
“It’s not your fault,” I say softly. “There are horrible people out there. It wouldn’t have mattered what you did.”
“I was her older brother; I should have been there with her.”
“She went to the store, Kenai. You didn’t leave her in a deserted forest. There were people around. You couldn’t have kept your eye on her every second. It isn’t your fault.”
He says nothing, and his body is so stiff. I’m not going to push. I know how it feels to have people push when you just want to be left alone.
“Did you find the man that did it?”
He nods. “Yeah, they found him. He killed himself in prison.”
Thank God.
“Is that why you do what you do?”
He rolls so he’s facing me. I can see the pain behind his eyes, and I want to reach out and take it away. “Yeah. I watched the police try to find her, I watched them and all I could think was ‘they’re not doing enough.’ I knew in that moment what I was going to do. I was going to go above and beyond to find people.”
“And you made it your entire life.”
“Yeah,” he says, reaching over and swiping a piece of hair from my forehead.
“I’m sorry that happened to your sister.”
He smiles, it’s weak but it’s there.
“It’s why you were so angry at me when you thought I had something to do with that book, isn’t it?”
His eyes flash and his jaw tightens, but he nods. “I didn’t know at the time you had no involvement. I thought you used your ordeal to get your claim to fame and it made me so angry. I couldn’t understand how anyone could do something like that, when so many others were out there, missing or being tortured. I also didn’t fully understand what you’d been through. It was easier for me to judge you instead of thinking about what you suffered. And I’m sorry for that, Marlie.”
“It’s okay,” I say, my voice shaky. “I’ve hated every second of that book. It’s ruined my life. It’s ruined Kaity’s life. I wish my mother had done more to help me and Kaity instead of throwing us into the spotlight.”
“You can’t change selfish people, Marlie. You can only choose to be better.”
“I just hate that Kaity suffered for it. If it wasn’t for my ordeal and that damned book.”
“Don’t,” he says, his voice hardening just slightly. “Don’t blame yourself. You didn’t ask for any of it. Kaity suffered, I understand that, but she still made her own choices. You can’t always blame yourself for other people’s mistakes and decisions. In the end, we’re adults and we still make the final decision on how we pave our life path.”
I shuffle closer and press my lips to his. “You should take your own advice.”
He snorts.
“Admit it,” I say, curling my arms around his neck. “You like me now.”
He grumbles and pulls me closer. “Just a tiny bit.”
My smile just about splits my face.
And it feels incredible.
FIFTEEN
I fall asleep in Kenai’s arms after talking for hours, but I’m woken sometime during the night to a rustling sound outside. I reach for my cell phone to see what time it is, but when I don’t find it, I remember I left it in the car. As much as I want to stay snuggled in bed, I want to check to see if anyone has called or texted about Kaity. I roll out of Kenai’s arms carefully and I pull on a tank top and a soft pair of cotton shorts.
I glance back down at Kenai, but he’s sound asleep and I know he’s exhausted. I don’t want to wake him.
I walk towards the door that leads out the back of the cabin. I flick the outside light on and step out, peering around. I can’t see anything, so I take another shaky step. The rustling comes from my left, and I whip my head in that direction, saying softly, “Hello?”
Nothing.
Probably just a squirrel.
I’m about to turn around and head back inside when I see that the interior light of Kenai’s truck is on. Narrowing my eyes, I move towards it hesitantly. Something feels off, but I remember Kenai’s words about me being paranoid. He probably just left the door open when he brought our bags in. I head over to close it. I reach the truck and see the passenger door is ajar. My blood runs cold.
That doesn’t seem right. One door, maybe. Two … no. My body goes on high alert as I peer around.
It’s o
nly then I realize it’s dark out here. Really, really dark.
I turn and face the cabin when a noise sounds out to my right. It’s loud, really loud, and it sounds an awful lot like footsteps. “Kenai?” I whisper, pressing my back to the truck.
The footsteps near, but I can’t see anyone. My heart is thudding against my rib cage as I start moving towards the back of the truck. “Kenai, is that you?”
A branch snaps, loud and terrifying.
I don’t think, I just turn and run.
I start towards the cabin, but a shadow right next to it has me swiveling in the opposite direction. As I charge into the trees I can hear the footsteps behind me quicken. Someone is chasing me. An all too familiar fear creeps up my spine. I run faster, tree branches scratching my arms, logs tripping me.
My hands hit the dirt when I go down over a fallen tree. I scurry forwards and my forehead slams into a thick tree trunk. Fear clogs my throat and I start sobbing, crawling forwards, fingers burning as skin is torn from them. The footsteps get closer, and I know I have to get up. I have to.
Get up.
Run, Marlie.
I push to my feet and start running again, hitting trees, dodging rocks. Blood trickles down my face and I can taste the coppery scent in my mouth. “Leave me alone!” I scream, panting, knees throbbing.
The footsteps get quicker and my knees give way.
I fall forward, pain radiating through them, right up my spine. I scream and try to scurry forward, but a heavy body lands flat on my back, pushing my face down into the dirt. I can’t tell if it’s male or female, I can’t tell anything. A hand hits the back of my head and shoves my face into the dirt.
I fight.
I squirm and buck.
“Let me go!” I scream.
“Marlie?”
Kenai.
Oh God.
“Where are you?” I hear his frantic voice getting closer.
A chilling voice masked by a voice changer radiates through my ear. “It’s not over. It’s just beginning. I hope you missed me, Marlie. I’m watching.”
Then the body lifts off me and footsteps disappear into the trees.
I can’t move.
I can’t breathe.
Was it him? Is he alive? Oh God. He’s alive. He’s alive.