by Megyn Ward
I walk to the kitchen where Zach is depositing the Red Stripe beer into the fridge. “Start with the day I walked away from you on the beach and left you to fend for yourself and to take care of Diana.”
Her face softens. “Oh, Blake. I don’t blame you for that. Your heart was broken. I understand.”
Zach hands me and Kylie a beer and takes one for himself. “If things had been different, I probably would have followed you off the island myself.”
A look so intimate passes between him and Kylie that I squirm. It’s obvious they’re not only in love, but that they respect and like each other. A feeling of envy lodges in my throat.
Erika and I are close. We could develop that connection.
Never.
Really, though, a relationship like that is rare. Deb and Ken have it and I was lucky to have them as parents and share in that happiness. I’m happy Kylie and Zach seem to share that special bond, as well. Do you really need that? There was a time when I thought I’d found it. In the most unexpected place. A Reality Princess who the world loved to hate. She’d chiseled into me so deeply that I felt she was part of the cells of my body. I fell for her superb acting skills and believed I meant the same to her. But I found out Liesa Temple is simply that, Liesa Temple. And she played me for a fool.
So get over her already.
I wave off their concern. “I was stupid to let that bitch get under my skin. Thank god she’s not on TV or in the tabloids anymore. Good riddance.” I lift my bottle in a toast and let the fizz burn down my throat.
Again, they pass one slight glance between them that has more information than a set of encyclopedias. They don’t drink.
Kylie outlines the logo on her sweating beer bottle. “So, yeah, like I said, a lot happened.”
A hammer drops into my gut. “What?”
Kylie sips and she bats an eye at Zach. He sets down his bottle and says, “The first thing is that Kylie and Liesa are sisters.” She says it like it’s old news. Like I should already know.
The information slips into my ears and slingshots behind my eyes as the words repeat and begin to make sense. “Jonas Knightly is her father, too?” For the first time in four years I regret my choice to close myself off from all things Liesa Temple.
Kylie tilts her head and a little smile tips her lips. “We agree that since neither of us look like him, we didn’t inherit any of his personality traits, either.”
Zach nods. “Amen. May that son of a bitch rot in Hell.”
Kylie chuckles. “He’s not technically in Hell, yet, but I imagine living with Simone feels like it.”
“Jonas and Liesa’s mother are together?” And then, before I can stop myself, I ask, “Is Liesa living with them?”
It’s starting to get annoying the way Zach and Kylie communicate whole conversations with the slightest twitch of their eyes.
Kylie passes over my question quickly. “No. So, anyway, Gram called bullshit at the wedding.”
She’s moving the story along so quickly I’m not following. “Wait, what wedding?”
Zach takes it up. “Liesa set this whole thing up, remember? She proposed to me and scheduled the wedding for two weeks. Mrs. Knightly—”
“Gram,” Kylie interrupts.
Zach’s dimples deepen with affection. “Gram. Convinced Liesa that she wouldn’t let the wedding happen but she never told Liesa her plan. So on that day, I thought I was going to a purgatory of marriage to someone I didn’t want, Liesa felt she’d lost her only shot at happiness, and Kylie….” He reached out and threw an arm around her shoulder and hugged her to his side. “Well, she was on her way to the States with you.”
This is the part I already knew. Reliving it made my chest feel as though bright steel bonds tightened, squeezing my breath.
Kylie takes over. “So Gram had us picked up and she had a dress for me to wear, told me I was the maid of honor. The whole thing started and when the minister asked if anyone had reason why they shouldn’t be married, Gram stood up and spilled the whole thing. Called me and Liesa her granddaughters, cut Jonas off from all but a trickle of income.”
Zach jerks her tight. “And we took advantage of the minister and decorations and got married.”
“Four years ago?” They’d been living and loving each other here on the island. I had lost so much time.
Kylie dumps the shrimp in the sink and starts to clean them. “Gram has really helped us out. She gave me the down payment for Paradise Found and had this cottage built on her grounds.”
It makes sense now. “So Mrs. Knightly lives in the big house.”
Zach nods. “She deferred the rent until we got Paradise Found up and going. But she’s a tough old bird.”
Kylie agrees. “Yeah. She believes she made a mistake giving Jonas everything he wanted and she’s determined not to make that mistake with us.”
Don’t ask about Liesa.
You don’t want to know what she did with whatever Mrs. Knightly has bestowed upon her. She probably ran through it skiing in Aspen or sunning on the Riviera.
“So, basically, that’s it,” Kylie says. “Now you.”
“Oh, come on. For four years all you’ve done is get married, run a dive shop, acquire the family you always wanted, and you’re living happily ever after?”
She dries her hands on a towel. “Yup. Now, your turn.”
Again, I’m hit with a sense of regret for letting our friendship die. Those four years, the day in and day out struggles and joys, are lost to me now. “I already told you about graduating. And I’ve got a few job offers I’m considering.”
Her eyes light up. “Let me guess, ACLU? Southern Poverty Law Center?”
Shit. Another punch to the gut at the reminder of the naïve guy I used to be. “Not exactly. Monsanto, Microsoft, and a law firm that specializes in big-name politicians.”
The silence in the kitchen can’t hold any more disappointment.
Zach jumps in. “That’s great. Sounds like you’ve got your pick. Leaning toward any in particular?”
“I haven’t decided.” Because they all sound like tightening myself into a straightjacket. But that was only work. I’d make a name for myself, sock away a bankful of money, and then practice a different kind of law.
Kylie studies me. “Seriously? You think that’s going to make you happy?”
I brush that off with a joke. “Happiness is overrated.”
Her returning smile looks worried.
“Speaking of happiness,” I say. “One of the main reasons I’m here to make amends—.”
She interrupts me. “Is because you’re so miserable you started drinking and now you’re working step six of the program and need to apologize to everyone.”
“Very funny.”
She thanks me and tips her beer.
“But I’m here to ask you to be my best man.”
Again, I’m met with a houseful of Not Happy.
Finally, Kylie pastes on a smile. “You’re getting married?”
“That’s usually why you need a best man,” I say, hoping she’s going to congratulate me.
Zach does the honors. He slaps me on the back. “Wow. Congratulations, dude. You’re going to love being married.”
Kylie flashes him the briefest of scowls and his eyebrows pop up in question. She starts to grill me. “Tell me everything. Who is she? Law student? Her family? What’s she like? Why didn’t you bring her?”
I hold up my hand to field the questions. “Her name is Erika Grant. She’s not a law student. Liberal arts and she graduated last month, too. She’s from Connecticut. She’s super-cute. Everyone loves her.”
Kylie folds her arms and it feels like a record skips. Liesa used to do that. Probably still does, only she’s doing it in front of someone else these days.
“But do you love her?”
I laugh at the obvious. “Of course. I wouldn’t marry her otherwise.”
She scrutinizes me. “I mean, do you feel choked if you aren’t br
eathing the same air as she does? Does your skin itch if she’s outside of the range of your touch? Do you want to share every moment with her, even when you know you can’t and you shouldn’t if you could?”
“Well, I….”
“When she walks into a room, do you lose your breath? Does all the light point to her and you can’t look at anything else?”
Zach scoffs at her. “Lighten up. If he says he loves her, let’s take him at his word.”
She opens her mouth to keep at me, then glances at Zach and shuts it. The Kylie I know was relentless in her opinions. Zach must be a mellowing influence. Can’t say as I miss those sharp edges.
She finds a copper skillet in the cabinet and sets it on the gas burner. “I thought you were going to cook.”
I jump up. “Thought you’d never ask.”
“So, when’s the big day?” Zach asks, pulling another round of beers from the fridge.
I swallow and brace for Kylie. “Next month.”
She hasn’t mellowed that much. “Next fucking month? And you’re just getting around to coming here now? And where the hell is this alleged Erika? How am I supposed to agree to be your best man if, for all I know, your fiancé might have two dog heads and a spiked tail?”
Zach leans his elbows on the island and suppresses a grin. “Don’t piss her off.”
Before I can answer, there is a slapping noise from the back of the house. Zach jerks to attention and starts to move. Kylie’s head snaps up and her eyes open in panic. What the hell can make them react like we’re under attack?
I swivel on my stool to see what’s approaching from the hallway, where I suppose there are bedrooms.
And there it is. Some kind of monster with pink skin, bare feet, soft brown curls, and a smile of accomplishment so wide it illuminates the whole room.
“I’m here!” The elf, or munchkin, or, more improbably, little girl announces.
Kylie’s mouth drops open. Zach scoops her up and she squeals in delight. He swirls her around and his eyes connect with Kylie. This time, they both seem to drop the information ball and look panicked.
I’m about to ask something, just not sure what, when the front door bursts open.
I lose my breath. All the light in the room seems to point to her and I can’t look at anything else.
Chapter 5
Lauren
I’m holding my brush, the blue I’ve mixed on the palate the perfect shade of whatever I’m feeling. I’m reluctant to name it. This is how it works for me. The colors speak without words and it makes life easier for me to navigate.
Ellie has been sitting behind me in the living room, playing with an array of small dolls and stuffed animals. She makes squeaks and squeals, but in a muted way. Our evening ritual is normally quiet, with each of us enjoying doing our own thing but doing it together.
At least, I thought it was together until I realize I’m not hearing her sweet, little voice. Maybe she’s gone to sleep playing with her animals, though that would be unusual. But when I look over my shoulder, all I see is a collection of My Little Ponies, some pocket-sized dolls and a barrage of stuffed toys.
No Ellie.
More annoyed than panicked, I set my brush down. Maybe she’d padded to the bedroom for more toys and I didn’t hear her. I’m more irritated with myself than her. I have to admit I had only been holding the brush, admiring the blue paint, and thinking about Blake. He’s been on my mind all day, as if I can feel him close. It makes me angry that the blue is for him. It’s the color of me missing him. Damn it.
“Ellie?” I don’t want to transfer my annoyance to her. She hasn’t done anything wrong. I walk into the bedroom. The soft light by my bed reveals the vacancy. Her bed is empty. She’s not in the closet or under my bed.
“Ellie.” A prick of concern pokes at me. Not because I think she’s in trouble, but because I’d been so distracted my mother’s radar had shut off. What if that happens outside the compound, where she could be in danger?
As it is, she’s probably slipped outside the open door and is smelling the jasmine. Maybe she’s crossed the piazza to sit with Gram on one of her patios.
I don’t bother putting on shoes and tread outside in my loose, filmy sundress. “Ellie.”
No answer. A slow irritation grows. Maybe she snuck out to Zach and Kylie’s to try to talk them into ice cream. I’m going to have to punish her and it makes me feel bad. I’ll have to deny her ice cream for several days. I hate discipline. Why can’t she do what she’s supposed to so neither of us have to suffer?
Stubborn. Like Gram. Like Kylie. Sigh.
Like me.
I trot across the piazza to Gram’s, but all the lights are off. Either Gram in having an early night, or she’s out on the town again. My money is on Gram going out. She’s a spark plug, is our Gram.
I swivel around and look at Kylie and Zach’s cottage. The lights are on and at least two people are in the kitchen. What to do? I don’t want to burst into their dinner party. But I need to know if Ellie is with them.
What if she’s not with them? Like getting rear-ended at a stoplight when you hadn’t looked into your rearview mirror, the thought that maybe something happened to Ellie slams into me. Damn it. I’m wandering around as if she’s walked into another room, when my three-year-old daughter is straight-up missing. What am I thinking? She could have slipped out of the side gate. Someone could have snatched her.
What if some crazy old fan found out where Liesa Temple is living and that she’s got a daughter? That daughter might be worth something.
I need Kylie and Zach. They have to help me look for Ellie.
I race across the piazza. I don’t care who their guests are. We need to find Ellie.
With my skin popping and zinging as if electrified, I grab the doorknob and shove inside. I’m ready to shout and tell them Ellie is missing.
The first thing I see is Ellie giggling in Zach’s arms. The second thing I see makes me feel as though Wylie E. Coyote has dropped the world’s biggest anvil on my head and I’m smashed into the expensive rosewood floor.
I’m trying to pull a breath into my lungs but I’m paralyzed.
Blake.
He stands by the island, mouth slightly open, eyes riveting on mine. My heart soars to see him.
My whole body cringes and wants to be anywhere but in front of him.
I want to throw myself into his arms and kiss him, feel his hands on me.
I want to punch him in the nose and listen to it pop and watch it bleed.
He might not be breathing. Maybe his heart quit pumping because he’s as white as Casper.
I drink him in. How the hell can he look so good? Seriously. His eyes are still chocolate brown, his curls are still unruly and look so soft my palm itches to touch them. And, for god’s sake, he’s still got the muscular chest and narrow hips he had four years ago.
I’m falling into his brown eyes and desperately fighting for my life.
“Liesa.” His voice sounds choked.
That one word breaks the ropes pulling me under and I blink. “Lauren. Lauren Knightly.”
He focuses on my nearly bald head. “Your hair.” He’s a regular Shakespeare.
There are times I miss my masses of blonde hair. It was something of a trademark for me and cutting it severed some connection with celebrity. Kylie keeps threatening to whack hers off, too. She says when I cut mine, it made my eyes the focal point and she lays it on thicker saying it makes me more beautiful and more mysterious. Also, it sure makes life with a toddler easier. But having Blake study me makes me self-conscious.
“What are you doing here?” It comes out harsh and at first I’m surprised but then I’m glad. I want him out of here. Away from me and….
Ellie.
Oh my god.
He seems to remember her at the same time and he whirls around to look at her in Zach’s arms. His eyes widen.
Zach and Kylie stand like opossums on the road right before the pickup smashes
them.
Years of Liesa’s Life have trained me to fill silences and to keep the scene moving. I tilt my head to Kylie. “I’m sorry. I know you said you were having company. I’m the world’s worst babysitter. She slipped out when I wasn’t looking. Guess she wanted to sleep in her own bed tonight, instead of Auntie Lauren’s.”
Kylie’s mouth clamps shut and she swallows, casting those panicked eyes toward Zach. He’s staring at me in annoyance. Ever since that whole debacle with the show and Jonas, Zach avoids lies and anything close to secrets like he would a Hannah Montana concert.
“Lauren, I—” Zach begins.
I cut him off and start talking before Ellie can interrupt. “I’ll just take her and get her out of your way.”
Ellie starts to kick as soon as I have her in my arms. “I want ice cream. I want ice cream.”
Now she’s decided to throw an all-out fit. Great. I know it’s because it’s late and she’s tired. I should have had her in bed an hour ago. But she’d been playing so nice and it had been peaceful in our bungalow.
And you’d been daydreaming about Blake, instead of being a mother to his child.
Kylie still looks stunned. She stares at Blake, then at Ellie. I know what she’s thinking. With her soft brown curls and her olive skin tone, how could Blake possibly miss the resemblance to himself? I clench my teeth and wait for him to confront me.
I’ll fight him. He’d better know that. There is nothing and no one who can come between me and Ellie.
I shoot Kylie a desperate look that tells her to step it up. She’s got to help me out.
Kylie plasters a fake smile on her face. “Well… surprise.”
Blake gives her a shocked look then turns to Zach. He better back me up on this one. I don’t know what I can hold over his head, but I saved his ass when it came to Kylie. Without me getting us out of Liesa’s Life, he wouldn’t be so blissfully married to the love of his life. He fucking owes me.
Maybe I transmitted all of that telepathically because Zach clears his throat. “Th-that’s Ellie. She’s, um, she’s our pride and joy.”