“I heard the news. My baby’s the captain. Gimme some love.” He leaned in and kissed me, and he wasn’t letting go.
His personal display of affection was a little overboard. I knew cheerleaders, band members, football players, and who knew who else were watching. He would not let me pull away.
Flinching and frowning, I said, “People are around us.”
As Blake’s hand caressed my back, he whispered in my ear. “Then let’s go somewhere alone. I wanna celebrate with you, baby. I’m the captain and you’re the captain.”
“Like I said, she is not going out with us anymore,” Eva declared, working her neck and her hips in irritating positions.
As much as I wanted to be with Blake, Eva had a right to be ticked. I said I was going out with my girls, and I couldn’t just ditch them. But my man wasn’t letting up, and he hadn’t been into me like this in so long. I was caught between wanting to do two things, which was impossible.
Remembering he had plans, I said, “I thought you couldn’t drive me after school?”
“My dad let us out early. What’s the matter? You gonna hang with them or me?” Blake asked, pointing to my waiting girls. “You always say I’m putting you second, and now what’s up with this?”
“What’s up with this anyway, Blake? You act like you’re all into my girl when you—” Eva mouthed off before Randal and Ella pulled her back.
“Whatever, Eva. You wish you could get with this,” Blake said to her, not wanting to be called out.
“Blake?” I grunted, unhappy he was talking about my friend.
I certainly didn’t want my boyfriend and one of my best friends going at it. Blake had to chill. Eva needed to let me handle this. Though I was torn, I knew if it was one of them, they’d tend to their man, so I had to do the same.
“Just go to the car.” I pushed him. “I’ll be there in a second.”
I turned to my girls. They all looked at me like I had truly let them down. My insides were hurting.
Saying the only thing I could think of given the situation, I explained, “Y’all know I’m nervous about Blake. You guys even said this other girl’s after him. I need to put in some time. I didn’t even know he was gonna want to hang out with me, or I wouldn’t have said let’s do something. But take the money. Go eat and don’t be mad at me.”
“We don’t want your money,” Randal said.
“Speak for yourself,” Eva said, before she snatched the forty dollars out of my hand, and they left.
Minutes later, we were in Blake’s car. “So you’re captain, huh?” Blake asked. The tension was subsiding.
I didn’t know where he was driving me, but he sure looked good doing it. His muscles were bulging from his chest. He didn’t have a stench from practice because he had showered. My man looked and smelled good enough to gobble up.
“Where are we?” I asked. We were heading into a neighborhood hit by the foreclosure crisis. There were homes that were partially built. Down in the cul-de-sac, Blake and I were isolated. He parked the car and reached over and reclined my seat. Before I knew it, we both shared my seat and the passion intensified. Our hands were roaming; our bodies were moving. We were in sync. Our shirts were off but when Blake took his hand down too low, I stopped it.
“Please, Charli. Not now. Let me give you the best celebration present. Captain to captain, I’ma show you how it’s done. You’re my girl. I want you. I want us. Give me what I need.”
He kissed me again, and I did not want to stop him. I did not want to lose him. I did not want him to be mad, but the voice inside of me knew that I was not ready. I did not care what the consequences of saying no were. That was my freaking final answer, and he had to deal with it. Then I realized the upset look on his face meant I might lose him, and I could not hold back the emotion.
I started crying uncontrollably. “I’m sorry, Blake. I’m sorry. I thought I was ready, but I’m not. Don’t leave me, please. I love you.”
Absolutely surprising me, he looked over and wiped my eyes. He leaned in gently and kissed my forehead. He lifted my chin to his face.
My caring beau said, “I’m sorry for pushing you. I love you too, and I want this to be right for the both of us. It’s okay.”
“Really?” I asked, feeling so grateful he cared enough to wait.
He nodded. When I was in his embrace, I felt so secure. I felt so safe, so special, and so loved.
When Blake dropped me off at home, chaos awaited me. Both of my parents were yelling at each other at the top of their voices. I wanted the drama to end.
“Charlene, knowing where that child is, is your responsibility. She could be with anybody, anywhere. You’re here all day. I don’t understand why you don’t know where she is. You got one job—taking care of this house. You can’t even do that,” my father yelled.
My mom lashed back at him. “You must think I’m stupid. All the after-hours meetings and stuff you been going to … right! If you care so much about your home and this family, where are you, Roger, most nights? You’re not on the bench at seven in the evening. You know the importance of telling the truth. So what is really going on?”
What was my mom trying to say? I had been so into my own world, hanging out with my friends, being with my boyfriend, and practicing my cheer moves, that the last thing I thought about was my home. My parents’ marriage really seemed to be in trouble. Before they said something they couldn’t take back, I stepped into the room.
“Is everything okay?” I asked timidly, knowing it was not okay but hoping they’d stop saying hateful things to each other if they saw me.
“Ask your mother,” my dad snarled, storming out of the kitchen.
“Charli, don’t stand there looking at me like you’re all disappointed. You’re a big girl now. Adults argue,” my mom said. She went over to the sink and leaned in as if she was trying to collect herself. “And where were you, Charli? Don’t even think about lying to me, saying you were with your friends. I talked to Hallie, and you were not riding with her. Your dad and I were worried sick. I called you, and you didn’t answer your phone.”
“My cell is dead, Mom.”
“Well, you need to start taking the charger with you. You knew you didn’t tell me where you were going after practice. That’s absolutely irresponsible. I didn’t know if you were at the school waiting for me to come and pick you up or what. So I went over there, and Coach said you were long gone.”
Thinking back to practice, I asked, “Did she tell you the good news?”
“Yes, I know you’re the captain. Under normal circumstances, I’d be elated. But captains are responsible, and someone who can’t let her mom know where she is isn’t someone I deem as responsible, Charli Black.”
My mother was not letting up. She wanted to know where I was. Honestly, I was so caught up in being with Blake that I did not think whether my parents were worried. Maybe my mom had a point. Maybe I’d been so self-centered that I was not really thinking about anybody but me, and that wasn’t right.
“I was with Blake.”
“Doing what and where?” my mom said, demanding an answer, hands on her hips. “You got out of practice two hours ago. Charli, you’re going to wind up pregnant.”
Shocked, I said, “Mom, no I’m not.”
“So you weren’t with that boy, kissing somewhere or doing much worse?”
Things were pretty intense with us in Blake’s car. I couldn’t lie to my mom. I just looked away.
“Charli?”
“We didn’t go far, Mom. Okay? Blake respects me.”
“I’ve seen Blake. He’s gone from a skinny, little toothpick to a bodybuilder for goodness’ sake. I know what high school boys want.”
“But do you know what Daddy wants?” I mumbled under my breath
“What did you say?” my mom asked, looking like she wanted to strangle me.
“I’m just saying, Mom, you gotta learn how to trust me. I can handle my relationship. But can you handle your
s? I came in here, and you and Dad were fussing. I’m not trying to be disrespectful, but I am getting older. You can’t treat me like a child. What’s going on with y’all? What’s going on with your husband?”
“Since you’re so grown, you take your behind from my presence and ask him.” I did not know what I’d done or said or how far I’d pushed her, but she screamed, “Go! Go ask him.”
“What’s going on in here?” my dad rushed in and asked.
“Talk to your daughter. She has some questions about your behavior. I think it’s best you answer them, Mr. Integrity. And while y’all are at it, find something to eat tonight. I’m not cooking.”
“Like that’s surprising,” my father said, before grabbing his keys. I followed Dad out the door.
My dad was the most refined man I knew. Classy and distinguished, he was never rattled and definitely believed not everything should be discussed. I knew he would not want me to talk about him and my mom. However, she had a point. If he was out doing things he shouldn’t with someone else, then he was guilty. There were consequences, like his daughter being upset. Over the years I had come to understand the one thing my dad wanted to keep intact was my admiration. I was his princess. He didn’t like me uncomfortable. He’d provided me with everything I’d ever asked for, unless my mom stepped into the picture and made him feel like he shouldn’t oblige my every wish.
“Dad, do you still love Mom?” I said when the car was too quiet.
“Of course, I love your mom, sweetheart. You don’t have to worry about anything. Honestly, we were having a serious discussion about you.”
I didn’t want to tell him what I’d heard. Though their conversation did start out with me, it ended up on him. What was he hiding?
Seeing I was puzzled, he flipped the focus. “Where were you, Charli?”
“I need a new phone, Daddy. My battery keeps dying, and I don’t want to buy a new battery that’s gonna cost forty or fifty dollars when … I want a new phone. I’ve had this one for two years. I’ve been a good steward. Every time I charge it, it dies shortly thereafter.”
“Why don’t you go and get a new phone?”
“’Cause I have two more weeks before the two years is up, and Mom doesn’t wanna pay the higher price.”
He shrugged like that was stupid. “So where were you?”
“I was with my boyfriend.”
“And I’m supposed to believe he doesn’t have a phone?”
“He was just giving me a ride home, and we stopped off to briefly celebrate,” I said, choosing my words carefully because I didn’t want to tell a fib to my dad either.
I couldn’t tell him everything though. If I said the wrong thing, I might not be able to see Blake again. Thinking back on Blake’s love, I knew we could never be apart.
“Why didn’t you just wait for your mom to come pick you up?”
“I’m going to the eleventh grade. I didn’t want my mom to pick me up.”
“So you’d rather hop into Hallie’s unreliable car with your friends? That’s crazy.”
“You know her dad is a mechanic. It might not look like it can make it, but it’s got all new parts.”
“Still … and then you are relying on some boy.”
Knowing my father wanted me to have my own stuff, I said, “I need my own car. I’ve been telling y’all that but …”
“There’s no but. You’re right. You need your own car.”
Then my dad whipped the car into the BMW sales lot. Everything in me was sparkling. There was a small, shiny black, four-door sedan dazzling on the showroom floor.
“Do you like it?”
“Like it? I love it!” I uttered back, amazed.
We got the salesman to take it outside. When I test-drove it, I felt like I was flying. The automobile was flawless. Ninety minutes later, after all of the details were finalized, it was mine.
Driving it home, I realized I didn’t get to press my dad about what was going on with him personally. I had a car of my own. My thoughts were diverted, plus my daddy told me that he loved my mom. I had to believe things were going to work out for them. Besides, that was their business. At this moment I could not let anything get me down. My relationship with Blake was going great. I was now captain of the cheerleading squad, and I had the bomb ride.
As soon as we pulled up into our yard, I ran up to my dad and threw my arms around him. “I love you so much!”
My mom came outside and her mouth dropped. She was not pleased. But when I ran up to her and kissed her too, she didn’t make him take it back. She was not happy at all.
“I’m gonna be responsible, Mom. I’m gonna keep my grades up. I’m gonna shoot for a three-point-seven-five or a four-point-o this year. You won’t have to worry about anybody driving me home. I’ll drive the speed limit. I’ll obey all laws. Mom, I got a car!”
My dad came over to my mom. He told her I really needed the car. Then he handed her four one-hundred dollar bills.
She asked, “What’s this for?”
“Money to go and get that child a new phone. Waiting two weeks is ridiculous when the one she has right now won’t hold a charge.”
Frustrated, she vented, “Whatever Charli wants, Charli gets, huh?”
My dad asserted, “Whatever she needs, she’s going to get, yes.”
“I … I … I can wait. I’ll go charge my phone now,” I said, not wanting my parents to argue.
“Can I take you guys on a ride? Please. Mom, come on, isn’t he beautiful?”
“Your car?” my mom said, shaking her head.
“Yes. This is Sir Charles,” I uttered, naming the beauty.
“Let me go change outta this suit, and I’ll be right back,” my dad said.
With my arms wrapped around my mom, I said, “Mom, please don’t be mad.”
“I just would’ve liked to discuss this with your dad. We’d already said we were gonna wait until second semester to get you a car, and he just goes out and does it.” She looked away.
And then she brought my chin to hers and said, “But you are a good girl, and you deserve it. Sir Charles is beautiful. I’m happy for you.”
She gave me a big hug. I was ecstatic. Having my mom’s approval was major.
As I drove my brand new car, all was right with the world. Sir Charles was packed to capacity with all my girls inside. We were following my parents to Hilton Head, South Carolina, and heading to a rented mansion for the weekend. I was determined to have a good time because as soon as we got back, it would be time for cheer camp. And school would soon follow. This was the last big break before my world was about to turn crazy.
I needed a serene moment. However, I didn’t consider the Eva factor. She always had something smart to say, and this time was no different.
“I’m surprised you invited us. I thought we’d be kicked to the curb again for Blake,” Eva said, obviously still as salty as movie popcorn.
I peeked in my rearview mirror and saw her rolling her eyes at me. A part of me wanted to pull over, right on an isolated stretch of Highway 16, and kick her out. But I couldn’t. One, because I was following my parents. Two, because I didn’t have it in me to ever be that cruel. Three, I knew deep down Eva cared but just didn’t know how to show it.
Instead of getting upset, I made a caring gesture. “I’m sorry, you guys. I should’ve stuck to my word and gone with you guys the other day.”
“You don’t owe us any explanation,” Ella said.
Randal said, “You wanted to celebrate with your guy. If any of us had a man, we’d be doing the same thing.”
Eva was in a mood. “Speak for yourself, girl. I gotta man.”
“Uh, one-night stands don’t qualify as having a man,” Hallie added.
“I know, right?” Randal said, as the two of them slapped hands.
Ella looked at her sister and said, “Don’t even respond back because she’s right. If you can’t take the heat, you need to leave the pressing comb alone.”
&
nbsp; Everybody knew Eva was faster than the rest of us, but now it seemed all Eva cared about was being satisfied. Maybe this weekend would give us all the chance to talk to her so she could start off this year with a better reputation.
About an hour later, we were pulling up to the house in Wexford. It was a gated community with a country club, and the property we rented had five bedrooms, four baths, a swimming pool right off the water, and a boat. My dad told us we would take it out a little later on in the evening.
My parents appeared happier. My goal for this weekend was for me to hang with my friends and allow them to have time to themselves to bond. We did not have to worry about cooking or cleaning because my mom had hired a maid and a caterer to do the job. We were to relax and be pampered. I certainly brought the right friends along for that.
As Ella, Hallie, Randal, and I relaxed on the beach, Eva strutted away.
“Why does she always have an attitude?” Hallie asked, saying what we all were thinking.
“There’s just a lot going on with our family right now,” Ella said. “She tries to act tough, but she doesn’t know how to deal with it.”
“Anything you wanna talk about?” Randal said.
“My dad’s marrying his girlfriend. They already have one son, and now she’s pregnant again.
“Eva just feels like it’s a slap in our face. My dad didn’t wanna raise us, but he’s happy raising sons with this other lady.”
“And did you tell them the other part?” Eva came up behind the four of us and said. “He has back child support due. My mama’s struggling. He’s playing house with somebody else. Just isn’t right. I’m sorry, Charli, if I’m not happy you got a brand new car. I can’t relax on the beach and enjoy this lavish house we’re staying in when my world is not right. It’s not all good for me, and I can’t pretend that it is.”
I got up, dusted some of the sand off, and said, “I’m not asking you to pretend, nor am I tryna flaunt anything in your face.”
“You gotta admit,” Hallie added, “your life is pretty together. My dad might be about something, but he’s still a single parent. My mom is strung out on drugs somewhere, and every time I mention trying to find her and help her, he goes off.”
Always Upbeat / All That Page 3