After a soft moan escaped from Daphne’s throat, Nina suddenly set her free and avoided looking her directly in the eye.
“Well. I guess that was bound to happen once, right?” Nina said, looking painfully uptight. “Hashtag lesbian friends.”
“That’s what lesbian friends do?” Nina’s response made Daphne even more unsure of how to interpret the situation.
“I don’t know,” Nina said. “I don’t have that much experience with them.”
“Neither do I, but with the few I’ve had, that’s never happened before.”
“Hmm.” Nina ran her hand through her hair. “Then it was my bad. I’m sorry about that.”
“You don’t have to apologize.”
“Uh, yeah, I do. I have a girlfriend. That was a major boundary breech to her and you.”
Daphne’s self-consciousness quickly dissolved into sadness as she watched Nina try to explain away their kiss as anything but what she’d felt it was.
That kiss burned inside her unlike anything she’d ever felt. Now she was supposed to stand here and listen to Nina dismiss it as something all lesbian friends do? Forget that.
“Don’t worry about it. It was nothing.” She walked out of the room and toward the front door to escort Nina out.
“Are you okay?” Nina asked at the door.
“Yes, I’m fine.” But Daphne’s terse reply betrayed her effort to sound convincing.
“Okay.” Nina opened the door and stopped before stepping out onto the porch. “Text me the minute you get an update on Sophie.”
Daphne nodded, almost dismissively. “Careful driving home.”
After watching Nina’s car drive away, she closed the door and leaned against it, finally exhaling all the breath she could’ve possibly stored in her lungs. What was happening to her? She’d naturally felt lingering awkwardness, but something else prickled her as she replayed their moment. It was an empty, bottomless feeling, like one of those scenes in old war movies when a young soldier boards the train, and his windswept sweetheart in her flowery dress chases the train down the platform sobbing until the distance swallows her.
In those movies, the girl was hopelessly in love with the soldier. But Daphne wasn’t in love with Nina. Falling in love with her best friend would be the absolute dumbest thing she could do, especially when said friend already had a girlfriend.
Daphne shook her head in an effort to expel those crazy, hypersensitive thoughts. But then came an even crazier notion.
What if falling in love with Nina was the Fates’ third and final act?
Chapter Fourteen
A few nights later, Nina invited Lacey out to dinner at an elegant and pricy Italian restaurant. Since she’d kissed Daphne, or Daphne kissed her, or they both kissed each other, guilt gnawed at her relentlessly. She’d tried her best to frame it in a way that made it seem less nefarious, playing all kinds of games with words to justify her actions: it was an emotional time for Daphne; she needed support; it’s not like they’d had sex—not even close. She’d even tried to pass the entire blame onto Daphne, reasoning that the poor woman had lost her wits in her grief over Sophie. But that flimsy storyline lasted only a minute or two. Regardless of who initiated it, Nina was culpable for her part and had to own it.
“What do you think, babe?” Lacey said as she read the wine list.
Lacey’s voice rescued her from the stark recesses of her head. “What’s that?”
She looked up with a mildly impatient glare. “I asked if we should get a bottle or go with individual glasses.”
“Let’s have a bottle. You pick.”
Lacey returned to the menu. “Merlot or a blend?”
“Surprise me,” Nina said, toning down the smile she felt was a little over the top.
“You’re quite agreeable tonight.” Lacey leaned back and seemed to relax. “I think I’ll try to use that mood to my advantage later.”
Nina loved Lacey’s expert flirtatious banter. She had no doubt Lacey could charm a Supreme Court justice out of her robe if that were ever her goal. Lord knows she’d had little difficulty charming a married, former straight woman out of her conservative world and her pants, on numerous occasions. Indeed, Lacey was a passionate woman with a killer allure.
“Your place or mine?” Nina said, laying on her A-game.
“I’ll take you anywhere.” Lacey sucked at her teeth as her bare toes started crawling up Nina’s thigh. “We can run over to the ladies’ room if you can’t wait.”
Nina’s juices were flowing, but the anticipation was half the fun. “How about we just enjoy dinner but skip dessert, so we’ll have more time?”
Before Lacey could answer, the server’s approach cooled the table…for the moment.
“This cabernet comes highly recommended,” he said, displaying the bottle against his forearm.
Lacey checked Nina with a glance, then nodded her approval. As he filled their glasses Lacey ordered a raw-oyster app, not that they needed the aid of an aphrodisiac.
After they gave him their entree order, Lacey leaned to her over the table. “Do you know what I can’t wait for?”
“Does it have anything to do with me being naked?”
“In a way,” Lacey said as she fingered the rim of her wineglass. “I can’t wait for the day when we don’t have to ask your place or mine.”
Suddenly the playful air was siphoned out of the room. Nina drummed her fingers on the tablecloth as she crafted her reply. “That will be nice someday.”
“Have you explained our relationship to Noah yet?”
“Not yet.” Nina smiled as she omitted the usual follow-up of “but I will.” That line no longer reassured Lacey as much as it irritated her.
“He and I have always gotten along well. How about we sit down together with him and tell him?”
“I think one-on-one is the better approach for this situation at first. But when we discuss moving in together, we can and should include him in the conversation.”
Lacey’s eyes lit up, and not because they’d caught the light of the flickering candle. That was the one thing Lacey wanted more than anything, but in her heart, Nina simply wasn’t ready to make the leap. She was just beginning to settle into her new life as single mom and the head of their household.
“Let’s talk timeline here,” Lacey said, practical determination dousing their naughty flirtation. “I’m assuming it would be easier for everyone if I moved in with you and Noah. I could sell my place in a month or two, and we could use the proceeds for a vacation home somewhere. How does that sound?”
Nina held her wineglass in front of her mouth, hoping to conceal the terror rising in the back of her throat. What was her problem? She loved Lacey, of that she had no misgivings. But to be honest, and now would be a good time to be, she’d have to admit that the full-court-press aspect of Lacey’s personality unnerved her a bit. Nina was not an all-or-nothing person. She carefully considered all the nuances of a crucial situation before committing to a decision.
“That sounds like a great idea, Lacey, but maybe we could pump the brakes a bit on the timeline.”
“Nina, in a couple of months, you and I will have been together for a year and a half.”
“Well, that’s sort of—”
“I would think, given our history and our ages, that’s enough time for you to be sure, no?”
“You’ve made that point before, Lacey, but don’t forget that we had a solid year in between of no contact at all. I just want to relax and enjoy the fun of dating you. Do you know what I mean? Our first year together was intoxicating, life-altering, and I fell head over heels for you, but it was also full of guilt, worry, and close calls. I’m just trying to catch my breath.”
After appearing to listen intently, Lacey sipped her wine and glanced around the room, seemingly searching for the appropriate response. “I get where you’re coming from, Nina,” she finally said. She took Nina’s hand. “I guess I’m just looking for the promise that we have a fu
ture, that this isn’t just the second act of a play that’ll be closing soon.”
“Lacey, I love you. I have for over two years now. Our time apart didn’t change that. But now that we’re free to be open about our relationship, we don’t have to dive into something so big, so soon. Let’s let it evolve organically.”
Lacey nodded. “It’s been a long two years for me, but if I have to wait a while longer, I’m okay with that. At least I won’t be sharing you with someone else while I wait.”
Nina caught her breath at a fresh stab of guilt. Should she tell Lacey about the kiss? The one that didn’t go any further and resulted only from acute emotional vulnerability and would most certainly cause way more trouble than it was worth if it was revealed?
“Thank you for understanding, baby,” Nina said. “Here’s to a future full of dreams coming true.”
Lacey raised her glass. “And to the immediate future when we go back to your place after dinner and create more smokin’ hot memories together.”
“I can never have too many of those.” They both leaned over the table and exchanged a sweet peck on the lips.
As she watched Lacey talk and chew and dip her bread in olive oil, Daphne’s face kept swaying in and out of her mind. She had to stop this. People made mistakes, but to keep crucifying herself over it was mentally draining.
And Lacey looked so sexy. Nina was heavily drawn to her intensity and Type-A Ultra personality that allowed standard Type-A Nina to luxuriate in the experience of someone else being in charge.
She smiled as she dove into the oyster app, relieved that Lacey seemed to agree with the idea of letting things flow naturally for the time being.
* * *
After work Daphne drove to the hospital to see Sophie. It had been several days since Sophie suffered the stroke, but that morning her son had texted to let her know she’d regained consciousness and that she could visit her if she’d wanted. If she wanted? Apparently, he hadn’t realized that, despite their more than forty-year age gap, his mother was her best friend.
As she hurried from the parking garage into the hospital, she wondered what she would see this time when she walked into her room. Her son had been brief in his text and never responded when she’d asked how she was. Maybe that was a good sign.
She entered Sophie’s room with another bouquet of overpriced flowers Sophie would surely scold her for buying. She’d risk the lecture if it meant Sophie had something nice to look at while she recuperated.
“Hello,” she said. Sophie’s daughter-in-law, Marley, sat knitting in the corner of the room.
“Hi, Daphne, right?”
She nodded and turned to Sophie. Although she was awake and sitting up in bed, something was definitely off. “Hey, Soph. How ya feeling?”
Sophie looked at her with only a hint of recognition, her face drooping on the left side.
“She hasn’t been able to speak since she woke up,” Marley said. She joined Daphne at the bedside. “She also has partial paralysis on her left side.”
The whole scene had shaken Daphne. “How long will she be like this?” She was speaking to Marley but couldn’t take her eyes off Sophie sitting almost catatonic and appearing bewildered as she watched them converse.
“They don’t know yet,” Marley said.
“She’s not going to be like this permanently, is she?”
Marley shrugged. “They ran another brain scan earlier but haven’t told me anything. Will’s on his way, so I’m hoping the doctor will have more information for him when he gets here.”
Daphne sighed and tried to ignore all the scary potential outcomes bombarding her brain. Instead, she forced a smile and held the flower bouquet in front of Sophie. “These are for you. But don’t yell at me for buying them at the gift shop. It was either overpay there or buy you a bunch of carnations in a bucket from the tweaked-out guy outside on the street.”
“They’re so pretty, aren’t they, Sophie?” Marley said.
Sophie’s eyes shifted back and forth between them, but her mouth didn’t move.
“Can you stay for a moment?” Marley asked. “I’d like to run to the ladies’ room.”
“Sure.” Daphne dragged a chair next to Sophie’s bed and sat. “I’ve been dying to tell you what happened with Nina the other day. Do you remember Nina?”
Another glint of familiarity but nothing more. God, this sucks so bad, Daphne thought. Sophie was such a good, caring, generous woman. Why would something like this have to happen to her? Daphne took Sophie’s hand and sheltered it between hers, rubbing the top of it, hoping the contact brought Sophie a sense of comfort.
“So Nina and I kissed on Sunday. Can you believe it? I know. I still can’t believe it either. But you know what’s weird? We’ve only spoken once in a text in the last three days, and neither of us mentioned the kiss.” Daphne reclined as best she could in the uncomfortable chair and stretched her feet out onto the frame of the bed. “Maybe it’s better we don’t. I mean, maybe we need a few days to get over the awkwardness so we can return to friendship as usual. What do you think?”
Daphne jumped when Sophie cleared her throat. She sighed when she realized that was all it was. “Do you recognize me, Soph? Can you squeeze my hand if you understand me?”
Sophie’s fingers tightened ever so slightly around Daphne’s. Exhaling in relief, Daphne rested her forehead on top of Sophie’s hand for a minute. “I knew you were still in there. It’s gonna be okay, Soph.”
When Marley returned with her husband, Daphne got up, greeted Will, and reiterated that she’d be happy to help with Sophie in any way. He thanked her and assured her that he’d keep that in mind, as that was what Sophie would want, too, if she were able to voice her opinion.
On the ride home, Daphne reflected on the swift turns her life had taken, none of which were pleasant—except for the kiss. That was pure euphoria, but even that had consequences Daphne still hadn’t been able to fully assess.
One of her best friends had suffered a massive stroke, but she couldn’t talk about her feelings to her other best friend because she’d kissed her a few days earlier, and now they were both clearly feeling weird about it. And she’d kissed one best friend and made things all weird, but she couldn’t talk about it with her other best friend because she was currently catatonic. What a mess.
She always had her other friend, coworker, Pascale, but he was hit-or-miss in the comfort and compassion department, depending on whether he was in love and getting laid. Last she knew he was, so tomorrow she’d run her problems by him during lunch and hope for the best.
* * *
After the customer with the missing suitcase sufficiently purged his rage into Daphne’s ear, she ripped off her headset and placed her phone on DO NOT DISTURB ten minutes ahead of her lunch break. Slowly dragging her hands from her jawline up to her hair, she muttered, “I hate my life,” loudly enough for Pascale to hear her declaration as he was approaching her cubicle.
“Come with me,” he said, indicating the pizza box in his hands. “You can tell me why this week over lunch. Bacon makes everything better.”
Despite the chilly temperature outside, they sat in Pascale’s car eating pizza out of the box.
“What did you kiss her for?” he asked. “Everyone knows you don’t shit where you eat.”
Daphne grimaced at his analogy as she chewed on a slice of bacon-and-onion heaven. “I may have leaned closer first, but it was pretty darn close to a tie in who kissed who first.”
“Well, that was dumb.”
“You think I don’t already know that? But I was really upset over Sophie at the time, so…”
“What does Nina think about it?”
“She basically laughed it off after it happened, which kind of irked me at the time, but it’s been days since we talked. I hope I haven’t ruined everything.”
“Why don’t you just call her and ask if you’re cool?”
Daphne huffed. “If I do that, then I have to acknowledge w
hat happened between us. She has a girlfriend, Pascale. Maybe she doesn’t want to talk about it.”
“Then don’t. Can’t you guys just slip back into your friendship with the unspoken agreement that you both fucked up, and it won’t happen again? Women have to make things so complicated.” He shook his head as he nearly devoured a whole slice in one bite.
Daphne sipped a spiked seltzer nestled in a koozie as she identified the source of his venom. “Let me guess. Natalie Ann broke up with you.”
“You can sense that without even the tiniest suggestion, yet you can’t figure out kissing your best friend’s a bad call?”
“You must’ve really liked this one,” Daphne said, teasingly.
“I wouldn’t have kicked her out of the sack.”
“Pascale, are you ready for a meaningful relationship?” Now she really laid on the teasing. “My little boy is finally growing up.”
“I don’t get it,” he said, licking pizza grease off his fingers. “Women always want to talk. All the time, about everything. They’re always asking questions, never thinking if they really want the answers. Apparently, I have to delete all my social-media accounts if I want a relationship. I mean, am I supposed to like pics only from dudes? Then she’d probably get suspicious about that, too.”
“That’s not a woman thing. That’s a maturity thing.”
“I can’t help that I’m attracted to younger women, and they’re all immature.”
“They’re not. You are. They’re behaving like they should for their age. You’re the one who never gives women your own age a chance. Try it sometime. You might find it refreshing.”
“Oh yeah? You might find it refreshing not kissing women who have girlfriends.”
Daphne bit back her initial impulse to react and chose to go high instead. “On second thought, maybe you’re dating right in the appropriate age range.”
They both reached for the last two slices and ate them in silence. Who knew Pascale had such depth? She actually felt sorry for him but stopped short of inviting him over to watch a Diane Keaton movie that night.
One Woman’s Treasure Page 15