He sat beside her. “It must be hard to watch someone you love deteriorate in front of you. Is that why you left?”
“More the other way around.”
He searched her face, but her thoughts seemed to keep her focus on the gentle ripples lapping against the bank.
“You should’ve seen him when I got engaged. He was so happy for me. So proud. Like life was finally complete.” She coiled a pine needle around her finger. “Honestly, I was happy too.”
“What happened?”
“Things changed. I changed. After Brian and I broke up, I moved to Hatteras, thinking I could do something with my writing.” Dejection plagued her voice as she chucked the needle into the water. “Guess you could say I needed to start over. Away from the disappointment I would’ve seen if I’d stayed.”
Had they been looking at the same man tonight? “I only saw love in your dad’s eyes.”
She swept a glance away from him. “The more someone loves you, the more you can disappoint them.”
The words drilled into him with reminders of the last conversation he’d had with Dad. If you could even call it that. Cooper letting his father down was one thing. But Quinn? No chance.
The bench’s top edge creased into the bottom of his shoulder blades as he stretched backward. “I get it, QT. Trust me. But if I was you, I’d take the risk before it’s too late.”
“Were you,” she said after a quiet moment.
He turned and caught an untamable and entirely too cute grin.
“When using the subjunctive, it’s were, not was.”
“Right. Because now’s the perfect time to bring up a random grammar rule.”
Her sweet laugh tumbled past her scrunched lips. “Sorry. I told you I was lame. I can’t help it.”
He shook his head. “You, Quinn Thompson, are anything but lame. And I have no doubt that includes your writing.”
A gorgeous shade of pink tinted her cheeks. But rather than look away, intuitive eyes studied him underneath the glow of the pier light.
One of the neighbor’s boats passed by them. Tiny waves swelled toward the shore, drawing in the solemnity of the earlier moment.
“You lost your dad, didn’t you?” she asked.
Cooper rose and loosened his neck instead of answering. Facing the clear water, he leaned an arm against the light post. “He was a good carpenter. Taught me what I know.”
“About boats too?” Quinn stood beside him now and motioned to his speedboat.
She didn’t miss much, did she?
“He was in the Coast Guard before opening a souvenir shop in Ocracoke.” Countless hours spent with him on the ocean garnered a smile. “Not that retiring kept him off the water. The man was out in his old skiff whenever he had the chance.”
“If you don’t mind my asking, how’d he die?”
Cooper kicked a splinter of wood into the water, wishing the dark memories still haunting him would sink with it. “He drowned while trying to rescue a family caught in a storm.”
“I’m so sorry.” A gentle hand smoothed over the back of his shoulder.
He breathed in at her soft touch. Words weren’t usually hard for him, but this topic . . . Or maybe it was something about her, the things she stirred.
“That’s why you’re opening a boat shop, isn’t it? To honor him.”
Why he bothered to withhold anything from her, he had no idea.
“I owe him that much.” He backed against the pole and ran a knuckle down his jawline. “My brother was always the golden child. Walked right in his footsteps like second nature.” And he was good at it, made for it even: awesome dad, responsible business owner, admirable husband. “Drew took over the souvenir shop when we lost him.”
“You didn’t want it?”
He wrinkled his nose. “Not my scene.”
The slightest touch of her arm grazed his. “But?”
“But nothing. It worked out exactly as it should’ve.” He rolled his flip-flop back and forth over a loose nail. “Drew was always the one Dad counted on to take care of things.”
“Does that bother you?”
“Only if I let it.” Which he had no right to. He was the one who’d played into the reckless little brother label people had given him. He’d learned long ago it wasn’t worth defying people’s assumptions. They’d believe whatever they wanted anyway, so why not prove them right?
He picked up the nail and crammed it into his pocket with thoughts better left buried.
“Seems ironic,” she said slowly. “You want to move across the world to open a boat shop for your dad, but you won’t get in the boat sitting right here.”
Cooper followed another nod to the speedboat he’d left untouched all summer. “That has nothing to do with my dad.”
“You sure about that?”
A tendon on his neck constricted. “Save your psychoanalysis, okay?” The harsh words rebounded into him with regret the moment they’d rushed out. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—”
“No, I shouldn’t push.” She swept her long hair over her shoulder without looking up from the dock. “I just don’t understand your urgency to leave. It’s fine if you really want to move, but why not wait? At least long enough to give yourself some time to sort through things with Brayden.” Eyes of yearning met his. “You might even decide to stay instead.”
His heart sank at her hopefulness. Because, truthfully, part of him longed for her to be right. But it didn’t matter. Whether he stayed or moved, he’d be letting someone down. At least Brayden still had time left to one day understand.
He steeled himself. “I already told you. I have to leave the Fourth.”
“But why?”
“Because.” Cooper turned and thrust his fingers through the back of his hair until a labored exhale gradually released them. He could withhold the answer all he wanted. It wouldn’t change it.
“Dad and I were supposed to take a cross-country trip the summer he died. I’d been begging him since I was ten. Had this whole epic journey planned out—just me and him, you know? Something neither of us would ever forget.”
“Starting on the Fourth?”
“I said it was going to be epic, didn’t I?” A wave of guilt absorbed his laugh till it felt like he was trying to breathe under water. “But I was too busy that summer. Too caught up in my new job offer at Shore Corp and my chance to get out of Ocracoke.” His voice dissolved to a whisper. “And then it was too late.”
A storm like the one from the night Dad died raged inside him. “I should’ve been there, Quinn. I could’ve helped Drew. Could’ve saved him.”
“It’s not your fault.”
Shaking his head, he smiled sadly. “You know, I got in a car accident the night of his funeral. Being reckless, angry. I could’ve died or been paralyzed. But nothing, not even a broken bone.” He dug his fingers through his hair. “I did everything wrong, while he—”
“Coop.”
“I’ve been nothing but selfish for years, putting off this trip because it wasn’t convenient. This is my last chance to do it. If I cancel again, it’s never gonna happen.” He swallowed before facing her. “I need to do this for him, Quinn.” For both of them, if he was being honest.
“Are you sure that’s really what this is all about?”
Cooper released a long breath instead of responding. Truthfully, he didn’t have an answer. At least, not one he was ready to face.
A damp breeze rolled off the west end of the lake and swirled around them. Rather than press further, she simply rubbed her arms and gave him the space he needed.
Minutes drifted in the quiet. Though time never fully healed wounds as deep as his, something about the time he spent with Quinn lessened the ache. Even in the silence.
“What you were saying about your brother,” she said slowly. “The comparisons . . . Is that why you’re upset he’s coming?”
“Nah.” Cooper swatted a mosquito away. “I just don’t want to deal with him trying to change
my mind about leaving.”
“Maybe he only wants the chance to say goodbye.” Chin lowered, Quinn tucked her hands in her back pockets. “You said you lived with them last year. That you were close with your niece.”
One sting followed another. “We spent a lot of time together while Drew was working to keep the shop open.”
“Hence your knowledge of teen girls and tans.”
He chuckled, grateful for the reprieve. “Maddie loves to paddle board. Loves anything to do with the ocean, really. And don’t get her started on sea turtles.” Thoughts of her soothed and ached at the same time. Saying goodbye wouldn’t be easy. “She has this way of looking at the world. Brave, accepting. Tackles life’s setbacks like they’re nothing but a bump in the road.”
“Setbacks?”
“She started to get real sick a few years ago. Turns out she has an autoimmune disease. She’s doing much better,” he quickly amended when Quinn’s eyes filled with concern. “But Drew had a pretty rough go of it the first two years.”
“Sounds like it was a good thing you were there to help.”
“Help?” He shrugged. “Drew’s too prideful to ask for help. I’m not sure how much I did anyway.”
“I have a feeling Maddie might argue otherwise.” She raised her shoulders. “In fact, I bet she even thinks you make a great father.”
“Quinn.”
“I know. I know.” A small wrinkle furrowed between her brows. “But you have as much love to offer Brayden as you do for Maddie. Don’t you think he’s worth your time too?”
“Of course I do.” He pushed off the pole. “That’s the whole point. He deserves time. Quality time from parents who won’t disappoint him. Swooping in to play the fun uncle card for a while isn’t the same as being a father, but that doesn’t mean I don’t wish I could be what Brayden needs.”
He pinched his forehead and blew out a breath. “You act like this is easy for me, Quinn, but it’s not. I don’t want to walk out of his life.”
“Then don’t.”
“What choice do I have?” Brayden’s best shot at the future Cooper wanted for him would require them to cut all ties.
She lowered his hand from his head and took it in hers. “You can choose love over fear.”
He held her tender gaze, breathed. As misguided as her belief in him was, he couldn’t help wanting it to be real, valid. “Quinn—”
Someone behind them cleared his throat.
They both turned toward Brian, of all people, standing at the top of the pier.
He pointed a thumb over his shoulder. “I saw your car parked out front. When you didn’t return my call, I thought . . .”
That he’d come trespassing on Cooper’s property? And what was he doing calling her when he was married to someone else? “You might try taking an unreturned call as a hint, hoss.”
Quinn set a hand to his broad shoulders that had moved into a protective stance in front of her. “It’s okay.” She eased around his arm and faced Brian. “I’m actually glad you came. We should talk.”
She had to be kidding.
She motioned that she was good, evidently reading his thoughts.
Jaw tighter than it had any reason to be, Cooper nodded at Brian and picked up his tool belt from the dock. “I’ll just be in the house.” He brushed past her ex, making sure he knew “in the house” meant close enough to haul him back to his car if he tried anything.
Not that Quinn couldn’t hold her own. Tall and confident, she stood at the edge of the pier like she was ready to withstand any storm that came her way. He didn’t doubt she’d be the last one standing.
In the house, he rinsed off in the bathroom and then eased in to check on Brayden. Moonlight cast a small glow throughout the room and onto his son’s peaceful silhouette in the crib. His son. The attribution caught him low and deep, followed by an even worse realization. Brayden wasn’t the only one he was getting attached to.
The view out back showed Brian hang his head at something Quinn had told him. He pulled her into his arms, and the nail in Cooper’s pocket might as well have twisted in his gut. After a moment lasting too long, Brian pressed a kiss to Quinn’s cheek and turned to leave.
She crossed her arms as though holding herself together, and the urge to go out to comfort her almost drove him past the one barrier keeping him in place. She didn’t need another guy in her life who’d end up hurting her.
She’d said it herself—the more someone loves you, the more you can let them down. Getting attached only bred heartache. He’d walked through it before. Had seen it so many times, even in Drew’s life. Quinn deserved more. He redirected his focus from the window to the crib, heart heavy. “So do you, buddy,” he whispered. “One day, you’ll understand.”
Cooper had made enough mistakes in his life. He wasn’t about to add these next two weeks to the list. He’d do what was best for them both. Starting with figuring out how to convince his brother not to come and make things worse.
Chapter Twelve
Enthralled
Slow, lazy blinks brought a venti cardboard cup into focus on Quinn’s nightstand where the baby monitor usually was. Quinn sat up in bed and looked from her stack of novels in the corner chair to her laptop on the modern dresser against the side wall. The guest room was as still and quiet as it’d been when she’d cut the lights off last night.
“Cooper?” she called.
No answer. No movement. Only the delectable aroma of what could only be one thing.
She picked up the warm cup, lifted the lid, and breathed in steamy, frothy, heavenly perfection. Her lips indulged in a smile and the sweet taste of vanilla. Despite living in the middle of nowhere, Cooper had found her a latte.
The man truly was something else. She was the one who should be buying him drinks after enduring a day at her family’s. Okay, he’d had his share of amusement yesterday, too, but he was doing her a favor she didn’t deserve.
As if eager and waiting to second the thought, the Cruella De Vil song roared into the silence. Quinn wiped the streak of coffee running down her chin while scrambling for her cell.
“Hello?”
“I’m loving the story, Thompson. Who knew Cooper Anderson was such a troubled bachelor?”
Quinn hadn’t written everything Cooper had shared with her, but she’d obviously painted enough of an idea for Cruella to run with it.
This was exactly why she wanted the executive editor position to begin with. So she could choose the right stories for the magazine, match them up with the best writers for the job, and start printing inspiring articles without the gossip and slander.
She scooted against the headboard and bunched a pillow under her arms. “You know, I was thinking. Why not do a different piece on Cooper? I really don’t think anyone’s interested in his past. Even if there was something going on with . . .”
A thought tied itself around her vocal cords and yanked them to the pit of her stomach. Fragments fused together a breath at a time: Cooper’s sudden departure from Shore Corp, his niece’s illness, his brother not wanting to ask for help. There never was a big scandal. Cooper gave up his job to help take care of Maddie, and the only reason he’d kept it so secretive was to shield his brother’s pride. No wonder he’d turned down every interview.
The coffee churned in her stomach.
“Forget the scandal,” Cruella said. “This single-parent, wounded-hero angle is far juicier. Readers are going to eat it up.”
“That’s not really the angle I was going—”
“You’ll write this piece, Thompson. And you’ll get Cooper’s permission to print it, or you can forget about coming back to this magazine.”
“What?” The coffee turned to lead, her insides cracking.
“I expect to see the full feature on my desk by Monday.”
In only a week? “Wait.” Quinn flung her legs over the side of the bed, her mind reeling as fast as her pulse.
It didn’t matter if Cruella lost her job
in a month or not. She was her boss right now. Even worse, Corporate had them both under scrutiny. If Quinn cracked under the pressure and messed up this feature, she’d lose her one shot at everything she’d spent the last four years working toward. “If we can just talk about this, I’m sure we can—”
“Monday morning, Thompson. And by the way, I’d look for a new roommate if you don’t follow through on this. Two jobless girls won’t be able to keep a roof over their heads in Hatteras for very long.”
Ava.
The second Cruella hung up, Quinn scrolled for her best friend’s number, knowing full well she wouldn’t be awake yet.
“You’ve reached Ava Constello. If this is Ryan Reynolds, I’ll call you back in five. Anyone else? Take your chances.” Beep.
“Ava, please tell me Cruella hasn’t fired you. Call me back, girl. This is important.” Quinn ended the call, tapped the phone to her forehead, and tried not to freak.
No, she could handle it. Had to handle it. It’d be fine. She’d come up with a game plan—something that’d make things right for everyone involved. She just had to clear her head.
With a purging exhale, she traded her cell for the cup of deliverance waiting for her and got out of bed.
Her clothes from last night lay in a heap on the floor, tangled with images of Brian hugging her on the pier in an attempt to glue parts together that’d always be broken. At least she’d finally told him why she left. Now, she had to find a way to tell Cooper why she’d come back.
She walked straight to Brayden’s room on instinct. Sunlight seeping through the closed blinds lit a path to his crib. With damp hair and red cheeks, he lay asleep in a onesie he was already outgrowing. Her heart cinched.
Cooper shouldn’t miss watching every little change take place in his son’s life. To see him take his first steps. Hear his first full sentence. She’d give anything to have that chance. Did he really not realize how lucky he was?
And what about Brayden? Would he accept love from adoptive parents the way he did from Cooper? Would he grow up feeling unwanted?
Just Maybe (Home In You Book 3) Page 10